The Proposal - The Special Stages
by Blade of Justice
Summary: "Hey, how do I write one of these?" "Write one of wha... Gah! W-What are you doing? The summary is supposed to go here! Look at all the characters you've used up!" "Not as many as you have." "T-That's not important! Just tell them to go read The Proposal or they won't get this!" "Get what?" "This! This is a spinoff to The Proposal!" "Whoa! What's it about?" "Absolutely nothing."
1. Tutorial

Neptune crossed her arms. She squinted her eyes. She tapped her foot impatiently. She swayed back and forth like a tree. She got on the ground and made angry faces. She jumped into the air and made a pose.

"Nothing? How come...?"

No matter how many annoyed or cute idle animations she went through, nothing happened. She still wasn't loading back into the story. She had always hated the stupid loading screens between chapters, but this one was getting out of hand. In fact, she was pretty sure that something needed to be reset if she didn't appear in the new chapter soon. Seriously, what was going on? Was this a glitch? Was there an error in the system? Had... Had Planeptune been _hacked_? What was she going to do if that had happened? Would the story have to start over?

Neptune gasped as something else occurred to her.

There was always... _that_ possibility.

"What if the world ended and we're getting rebooted? Or we got canceled? Or there's a time loop? Or alternate dimens- Wait, no, we already have those, don't we?" Neptune tilted her head. She supposed that one probably _wouldn't_ effect her too much if that was the case here, but... Reboots or time loops? Those were big trouble! "After all, tons of people are into that these days! Maybe the story is starting over because of some super evil mastermind who wants to change little things about the story to fit their devious plot! All the kids are into that now, right?"

She had to find Noire! After all, if that was what was happening to them... Then their whole relationship might not even happen! Forget _that_, everything as she, Neptune of _The Proposal_, knew it might not even ever come to exist! What if this reboot led to someone else stepping in to marry her? What if it led to Nepgear and her switching places? What if it led to her _not even existing_...?!

What she had thought of as a mere loading screen between chapters, perhaps another data crash like when she and the others had just started releasing Part 2 to the waiting people of Gamindustri... This could be so much more...! What if she would be the only one in this new world who remembered anything?! What if she eventually became emotionally scarred and super angsty and traded in her super sweet lovable self for an emotionless brick that was only known for throwing trucks at people and tilting her head funny?! She didn't even have a license for head tilts like that!

"Neptune, what are you doing?"

The CPU blinked. Slowly, turning away from the window, she found herself looking at none other than Noire herself. Relieved that she wasn't the only one stuck in this strange time loop reboot cancellation warp... thing, thrust from the constant line and sense of the main story, Neptune let out a breath she hadn't realized she'd been keeping in, not at all concerned to be reusing such a tried line to express said relief, and laughed.

"Golly, Noire, am I _glad_ to see you. Can you believe this? We got kicked out of the story!" As if to make her point, Neptune waved her arms around. Sure enough, though they were still, at a glance, in Planeptune's Basilicom, something was definitely off about it. There was a lack of... logic in the air. The lines of continuity were growing thinner by the moment. They were _definitely_ no longer in _The Proposal_, at least not as they knew it. "I guess there's no helping it... If it's just us, Noire... We're going to have to repopulate the world all by oursel- OWMPH!"

Shocking no one, Noire had grabbed the nearest object she could get her hands on (a Lowee Remote of all things) and thrown it straight at Neptune's face, knocking the smaller girl flat on her back while the little thing stuck out of her mouth.

Despite herself and her furious blush, Noire smirked at the sight of Neptune's current situation. Bulls eye. Sadly, time was short, and she couldn't spend the bit that she had gloating.

"Neptune, don't you pay attention to anything? This is one of those... You know." Seeing that Neptune not only did not know, but was now in the process of pantomiming something ridiculous, Noire rolled her eyes and walked over to her wife, yanking the remote out of the girl's mouth. She eyed it for a moment, and after making sure Neptune was too busy coughing to be paying attention to her, she blushed guiltily, an even guiltier look on her face, and pocketed the saliva covered device. Neptune would be none the wiser after all. "A-Anyway, this is a spin-off. A _spin-off_, Neptune. We already have games like that in the... Well, the 'real' series. It's not 'canon'. It's... For fun, I guess? We're still in the regular story, this is just for nonsense on the side. Surely _you_ of all people can understand a silly thing like that, right?"

As her coughs began to subside, Neptune sat up and nodded slowly. She looked at Noire, about to offer a grateful smile for easing her concerns about getting canceled or whatever after only two seasons (they hadn't even introduced a final boss! or a rival love interest! no one had been kidnapped! there was no sixth ranger! they hadn't had a beach episode or a brainwashing episode yet! how could they _possibly_ end things here?!) when she realized she had gained a strange new ability.

"So, Noire, uh... Whaaaat are you gonna do with that remote?" Smiling sheepishly, Neptune stood up, acting as though she was talking to a loose cannon ready to go off rather than her wife. Considering what she had 'seen' Noire do and how she had gone about it? Darn right she was gonna be a little wary! The other Noire and Plutia were probably into this kind of thing, fine and good for them, but she sure as heck didn't need _her_ Noire going stalker on her!

"H-H-How do you...?!" Noire could barely speak, her mouth opening and closing as her cheeks began to burn a bright red. Her eyes widened as _she_ 'saw' something herself. "I-I am _not_ going to go _anything_ on you! And I thought we already talked about stalking once before in the story anyway!"

Rather than react in a "oh no, I'm caught!" way like Noire was, Neptune at least had the sense to point dramatically and start playing uplifting and victorious theme music (in her head).

"That's not fair! Even I don't know what's going on in my mind half the time, so you're definitely not allowed to read it!"

Noire stomped her foot in frustration. She had _not_ read Neptune's mind! She had just...

"Wait... It wasn't there that time. There was a little, but not the same..." The black haired CPU frowned, her blush starting to fade. Genuinely curious, and not at all simply commenting because she wanted a distraction from her "crime," Noire looked around the room, as if expecting "it" to appear again like it had before. But... There was nothing. "Neptune, do that again."

"Ha! I won't fall for that! You can't distract me from the _real_ issue, you _mega perve_-"

"Stop!" Noire thrust both of her arms out to her side. For once in her life, Neptune actually listened and stopped talking... and sure enough, Noire didn't see anything. Yet... Neptune _had_? If that was the case... Then there could only be one possible explanation for it...

"Well? What is it?" Neptune titled her head. She couldn't very well decide if Noire was trying to just divert her attention or not if Noire didn't actually tell her, now could she? "Hurry up!"

Lastation's CPU grinned confidently, ignoring her wife now that her suspicions had been confirmed. For "it" had appeared again, and whether or not she was trying to divert Neptune's attention was a moot point now. She could see things so much more clearly now.

"Since this story isn't 'real', we're totally free from the already pretty thin boundaries of the fourth wall and 'canon' since it's just for fun." Noire held up a single finger, a pair of glasses suddenly appearing on her face, and she looked for the world like a brilliant teacher explaining something incredibly obvious to the dumbest student on the planet. Not all that unlike her current situation, really. "So what's going on here? _We can see the narration_. It's not like we even have that in the games anyway. And what's strictly 'in character' gets a little blurry here too. Think of it like special bonus material from an anime or TV show, like when they have the serious character act _too_ serious for the sake of a joke or make the ditzy character really flirty for one. We're not going _that_ far, but, um... B-Basically, it's scripted, so it's not quite bloopers or anything, but it's... You know... Still a thing... I-If that makes sense. O-Oh, and it's obviously going to be assuming you've read the most recent chapters too, so, you know, consider this a 'spoiler warning' here."

Neptune blinked. That last line had seemed kind of jammed in there. Actually... A lot of that had been... Ehhh, really, wifey? Had there been no more natural way to get it in, Noire...? Well, nothing they could do about it now, she supposed.

"I... _think_ I get it now, Noire! So this is basically just a dumping ground for offshoot junk that isn't a part of the story in any way, but is still tangentially related to it?" Neptune paused as she went over what she had just said. "Holy guacamole! I just said 'tangentially'! And I don't even _like_ tangerines! It's already starting, Noire! My brain is changing!"

With a poof of smoke, just like that, the glasses on Noire's face disappeared. The CPU rolled her eyes at Neptune's antics, but even though she felt a bit better about things now, there was one thing that still bothered her about this... strange situation that they found themselves in now.

"You've basically got the idea, yeah... I just hope no one will get mad at us or anything for this..."

"Why? ... Oh wait, I get it. Because, in other words... What you're saying is... Whatever we end up putting in here is all pretty much pointless fanservice and has no bearing on the main story at all?"

"Pretty much."

"Sounds fun! Let's get started."

* * *

><p><strong><em>The Proposal;The Special Stages<em>**

**_NOW LOADING..._**

**_PRESS START!  
><em>**


	2. Anniversary Stage 1

Neptune let out a "whoosh" of air as she collapsed into what felt like the fluffiest couch in existence. In reality, it wasn't an more fluffy than usual, but after everything she'd been doing lately, it felt like she had just flopped herself down on a cloud. Smiling a satisfied smile, she closed her eyes and let the fluffy fluffiness of the fluffy couch of fluff (if only there was a way she could say "couch" with the word "fluffy!") take her away.

"I can't believe it's been a whole year..." An oh so familiar voice brought Neptune out of her fluff-induced stupor. Opening her eyes, Neptune was greeted with the sight of her wife joining her on the magic carpet of fluffiness — though from her reaction, she didn't appear to find it any fluffier than usual. For shame! "Can you, Neptune? It doesn't feel like it's been that long at all."

Sitting up, Neptune scooted towards her wife — an action that initially got Noire sitting up straighter herself in embarassed surprise, before she settled into letting Neptune lean into her. With that, Neptune grinned to herself and almost found herself purring in satisfaction, like a kitten that had just found its favorite spot again after an especially tiring day. She was _tired_, okay?

What had she been so interested in the _couch_ for? Noire was the only source of soft she would ever need!

"Not to burst your bubble, my dear, but... It hasn't been." Neptune pointed out innocently, looking up at Noire with a "look at how cute I am you wouldn't shove me would you?" sort of look. Noire quirked a brow in response — Neptune was clearly about to say something that was going to frustrate her, as she tended to do. "Not for us, anyway! For us it's only been a little over a month... Well, okay, so there was the stuff going on before Histy called you and Blanc and Vert was going on too, but-"

Noire sighed.

"You know that's not what I meant!" Gently shoving Neptune to the side — and forcing herself not to smile when Neptune made an adorable little cry when she collided with the arm of the padded couch — Noire stood up and pointed to the calendar on the wall. "One year ago today is when this all came into existence! It was one year ago today that everything began! See?"

Peeking over the arm of the couch, Neptune up and looked at the calendar. She tilted her head. Furrowing her brows, the CPU made a face that made her look like she had encountered some kind of enemy that fought with confusing math problems.

"Noire... Why do we have a calendar that does that?"

"Does... _what_?"

Neptune jabbed a finger towards the offending calendar, eyes narrowing with an accusatory glare. Noire actually jumped at the sudden change from cute to... well, whatever that was!

"It's only been a month in the story, and _we're in the story right now_! We shouldn't know if it's been a year or a week or a decade! This is going to totally ruin the immersion of the readers!" Neptune crossed her arms, shaking her head as clicked her tongue. "I can't believe you, Noire, not understanding such basic things about storytelling... It's a good thing you're not the one in charge here."

The black haired CPU could only rub her temples. Why did Neptune have to be so difficult? Besides...!

"Aren't you the one who's always going on about being the main character this and being the main character that?" Noire tossed a hand through her hair, making a 'hmph' sort of noise as she set her hands at her sides. "If anyone has been ruining the immersion, it's you!"

"Jeez, Noire... Of course _I_ can do that, _I'm_ the main character." Neptune placed her hands on her hips and looked at her wife as though she was speaking dogoonese. "You've had this whole scene backwards from the start! If anyone is ruining the immersion..." Neptune ran a hand through long hair that wasn't there, in a perfect immitation of Noire. "It's _you_ for forcing us to take on each others' roles!"

"W-W-What are you _talking_ about...!?" Noire cried indignantly, throwing her hands out to her sides as she returned to the couch to stand in front of Neptune. They hadn't switched roles or _anything_ like that! She had just been appreciating all of the things that had happened to them this past year — was that so wrong?! She didn't think so!

As Neptune looked at her with that look on her face, such a taunting, cocky look, a look that made Noire want to question if this past year — or month, as Neptune had so annoyingly put it — was worth it at all, an idea slowly began to sneak into her mind. It was an idea that would never get to come up without the context Neptune had presented to her now, but since it was there, ripe for taking advantage of...

"Fine... Since, like you're saying, our roles are reversed..." Eyes sparkling mischievously, Noire lowered herself onto the couch — or rather, onto the person _on_ the couch... or more specifically, into a position that Neptune simply would not expect from her. A position right above Neptune, practically on top of her even. "Then I can take your role here and do this kind of thing, right?"

"W... What are you..." Swallowing, either due to nervousness or anticipation, Neptune's eyes widened as she stared at the black haired goddess hovering over her. Noire seemed to have one thing on her mind and one thing only. But... But...! T-They had something to do here, didn't they?! What was Noire trying to pull...?! Had she forgotten that they... What were they doing again...? "T-This isn't what we're supposed to- The scene, Noire, the scene!"

Noire placed a finger on Neptune's lips, her own lips mirroring the smirk that Neptune herself often wore when she pulled stunts like this.

"I think you're going to like _this_ scene much more."

As Noire lowered herself to meet Neptune, the smaller CPU quickly came to realize that Noire was very right about that.

From the next room over, Histoire sighed as she clenched her tiny, shaking fists. She knew that, much as she wanted to go in there and yell at the two CPUs for messing around, should she enter that room, the rating of the story would have to go up without question. Shaking her head as her cheeks continued burning bright red, Histoire withdrew a particular item from a drawer.

Luckily for her, while it might have taken three days to knock some sense into those CPUs, it didn't take three days to install earplugs.

"This is _not_ the way they were supposed to open the special one year anniversary chapter... They didn't explain how the scenes here are meant purely for fun and do not take place within the story at all, how this is meant to thank the loyal people of Gamindustri who have followed our saga for this past year, or how some were meant to be silly behind the scenes segments while others were meant to be random occurrences that could never happen within the confines of the story... There's no way anyone seeing this will understand that the various, completely unconnected scenes within this special anniversary chapter exist outside of the story's 'canon' and are there only as a way to give thanks and to provide some light hearted celebration without the opening scene that they were supposed to provide for us! How will anyone know what's going on _now_? Ohhhh, I should have gotten someone else for this job... Worst of all, because we didn't get this chapter out on time, when it's finally out there, it will be _over_ a year when this is finally seen! Oh, what should I do, what should I do... It will probably take me three _more_ days to find someone else who could do this scene without messing it up..."

Sadly, Histoire would not realize she had taken care of the job herself for three years, during the press conference announcing _The Proposal — The Movie: The Book._

* * *

><p><strong><em>Now initializing...<em>**

**_The Proposal_**  
><strong><em>Super Duper Special Almost-Entirely-Non-Canon One Year (and a little extra) Anniversary DLC Special!<em>**  
><strong><em>Press Start to Begin!<em>**

* * *

><p>"Um... Noire, something seems funny about that last scene..." Neptune shot a look at the black haired CPU, who was sitting next to her on the couch facing the biggest TV screen that either of them had ever seen. The two of them were watching over the first batch of Special Stages together, ones that had actually, somehow, been written long before the idea of "Special Stages" had even come around, and Neptune had immediately caught something being off with the first one. Were they already in legal trouble...?!<p>

"We messed up is all." Shrugging, Noire simply began reaching for the remote to get the next scene going. It looked like they had a pretty long way to go... "This whole 'anniversary' thing was supposed to be in one really, _really_ long chapter that came out on the one year anniversary of the main story to celebrate a whole year of running and all of that. A year's not _that_ long, is it?"

"For regular people, it is. I remember that in a year, Compa- I mean, the baby one, not the one you know, anyways, she got more teeth and was moving by herself more and she even stopped pooping her pants as much." Like she was making the most normal comment in the world, Neptune suddenly burst into silly fourth wall breaking things with examples of her harrowing feats of "motherhood" in the other dimension. Noire just stared at her, jaw dropped. "W-What? I know we didn't talk about it in the game all that much, but diapers don't change themselves! Not all the time, anyway!"

"I'm going to pretend I didn't hear any of this..." Despite how she was acting disgruntled by this knowledge, the fact that Neptune, even in _that_ game, had had a hidden motherly side... Inside, Noire was rolling on a bed and hugging a pillow, squealing about how cute that was. Or something to the girlish effect. Naturally, her outer reaction was one of simple disdain and disbelief instead of anything even remotely resembling how she really felt. "A-Anyway, this whole 'Special Stages' thing that we're in right now instead of the main story only even came into existence so that the anniversary stuff, and maybe future stuff like it, has somewhere to go instead of clogging up the real thing. The anniversary thing could end up just being it for the special stages too, though..."

"Ohhhh... So that's why this was written like it had just come after the end of Part 2?" Neptune grinned darkly as Noire nodded positively to her question. "I get it. Starting with 'I can't believe it's been a whole year' right after Nep Jr. woke up... That woulda been _awful_! You know, I kind of wish we had done that anyway. Wait, does that mean this whole set of anniversary special stages is going to be written like they were the next chapter in the main story? Instead of being their own thing like they are now? Isn't that kind of lazy?"

Noire gave Neptune a very pointed "you are not one to talk" look before she continued.

"We'd been shooting this, I guess if you want to call it that, for _weeks_. Almost _two months_, Neptune. The references and jokes based on it being a chapter in the main stor_y_ and the 'real' world_ aren't_ big enough deals to go through all of that. Can we please start the next one now? There's one I want to get to before Histoire gets back..."

Neptune raised an eyebrow. With Noire's expression... The way she was starting to get antsy... She could push this subject and risk having Histoire walk in right at the good part, forcing them to fast forward... _Or_...

"Well don't keep me in suspense, Noire! Turn it on already!"

"I-I'm doing it, I'm doing it! Gosh..."

* * *

><p><strong><em>Really now initializing this time...<em>**

**_The Proposal_**  
><strong><em>Super Blah-Blah-Blah Special!<em>**  
><strong><em>Press Start Again to Begin!<em>**


	3. Anniversary Stage 2

Everyone had finally arrived. Neptune and Noire were holding a party — because of course they were. There were banners all over the place, celebrating the story's one year anniversary, and balloons and food and all other kinds of typical party favors and delights were strewn about all over the tremendous room. One might have thought it a ballroom, if not for the fact that the walls were decorated like some kind of video game museum. Thankfully, the decorations blocked off most of those.

There was eating and mingling and much excitement to be had. Everyone at the party was having a great time.

There was just one... teensy eensy weensy little itty _bitty_ problem with the whole thing. Totally insignificant in the grand scheme of things, really. Not at all important. Didn't change a thing.

It was just that the guests of honor had yet to arrive. Neptune and Noire were nowhere in sight.

The partygoers all had their own ideas regarding what was taking the lovely Neptune and Noire so long to arrive to their own party. Wouldn't they _want_ to be here? It wasn't like there were any scenes running alongside this one where they were bonding elsewhere like when they had gotten married or anything like that...

"They _are_ aware this scene isn't at all connected to the last one, right?" Sighing, IF crossed her arms. Everyone had gotten dressed up — even that weird guy in the pink power suit had worn a black version of his normal armor so it looked like a tuxedo! Or... At least so IF had thought it was, but apparently he was calling it a dress...? Happy place, happy place! "I hope they didn't decide to _really_ do something together for the sake of 'realism' or anything like that...! This is probably going to be the only time we ever get to do something like this!"

"Don't worry about it, Iffy...!" There was Compa, smiling brightly and dutifully standing at the brunette's side in a stunning dress that was none too showy but still made her look as great as ever — though IF may have been just a _little_ biased in that assessment. "Nep-Nep knows what she's doing."

IF smiled ruefully at the girl's optimism. If only that were true more often. She supposed she could let it go for now though. It was a party, after all! If Neptune and Noire wanted to do... whatever they might be doing, who was she to complain?

"I'll take your word for it then, Compa." IF reached for the girl's hand to give it a squeeze, but in that moment, the sound of a door slamming echoed throughout the spacious room. The sudden noise caught the whole by surprise, and this surprise caused IF to miss her target by quite a bit. Instead of grasping the hand that had been at Compa's side...

"O-Oh!"

... she got the girl's rear end instead.

While the rest of the room's occupants were looking in the direction of the noise, Compa and IF could only look at each other. IF's face was burning bright red and she looked like she had just been caught trying to steal some of Neptune's pudding. Obviously she hadn't _meant_ for this, but now she was simply too horrified to move! What was she supposed to do?! Compa was... Compa was...!

Compa was... just _looking_ at her...! How was she supposed to react to that...?! Sure, she was blushing too, but IF knew if she were an outsider looking at their expressions, based on the way Compa looked compared to her, she would have thought it had been _her_ that had just gotten groped! Compa looked... Compa looked way too at ease with this!

While it was no secret what kind of relationship some of their friends had (they could just read the story after all), theirs was... well... It wasn't... Like _that_. They were childhood friends, after all! They were taking it slow! They were going at their own pace! They were happy with things being as they were now! They were... They were...!

They were... still... not moving... from this position...!

"Now what in the world is going on _here_?"

At the sound of an all too familiar voice, IF's body moved on its own. There was only one thing she could think to do — _move that hand away from that (great) behind_! In her urge to get out of the situation as fast as humanly possibly, however, IF didn't put much thought into how she was going to go about it. All she wanted was to simply move that hand.

In hindsight, sliding it up from Compa's rear and up her side to firmly hold her by her waist, so she could then tug her very close all in one swift, _totally_ not possessive looking movement might not have made all that much difference in the long run.

At least Compa seemed to be enjoying the attention the brunette was giving her, and thoroughly at that, though IF didn't seem to notice this at the moment. While her friend, her _date_ more than that, was positively glowing as IF held her at her side, IF could only pay attention to the reason she had brought Compa to her side in the first place.

For standing before her in a stunning dress of her own was none other than Purple Heart, gloved arms crossed and an almost taunting smile on her face as she looked at her two friends. Not too far behind her was Black Heart in an equally lovely dress, though she was currently entertaining some of the other guests. If IF had to guess, the sound that had caused all of this in the first place had been the two CPUs making their entrance.

"We were just waiting for you, Nep-Nep!" Compa, clearly not perturbed by any of the events that had led to IF's hand winding up keeping such a firm hold on her waist, gave Purple Heart a cheerful reply with a smile. Purple Heart returned this smile with one of her own, and with that, it seemed as though the ice had been broken. IF's hand relaxed somewhat at Compa's side... though she made no attempt to move it, or step away from Compa. "It's your party after all."

"Noire and I just wanted to make our entrance all the more memorable... I don't get to appear much in this form in the story after all." Eyes twinkling, Purple Heart looked from Compa to IF, still smilng ever so slightly at the two of them. "It appears as though you two missed it all the same. It appears as though something _much_ more memorable was happening over here."

Compa, apparently not understanding what Purple Heart was referring to, simply tilted her head to the side in confusion before glancing at IF in the hopes of an incoming explanation. IF, on the other hand, lowered her gaze as a renewed blush began to spread across her cheeks. It wasn't like she could deny what the goddess was saying or anything like that, but...

"T-That's..." Shooting a glance at Compa, IF decided that she wanted what had happened, accidental as it was, technically not even part of the story's canon as it was, to be something for the two of them only. With that in mind, she raised her head to give Purple Heart an almost defiant look. It was time to change the subject! "Did you two _really_ have to start this off doing something like that?"

Purple Heart had expected as much, though she decided to let it slide for now. She knew all too well what it was like when a moment was spoiled, and it was clear the two of them still had quite a way to go before they caught up to her and Noire. It was... cute, in a way. Maybe _this_ was how Cave had felt when she had talked to her that day?

"Like what?" That didn't mean she was just going to accept everything IF said, of course. Raising an eyebrow, the goddess placed a hand on her hip. For Neptune, such an action wouldn't mean anything at all, but to see the mighty Purple Heart doing it, and in such an elegant dress no less... Even though she was still Neptune, it gave an entirely different impression. "I'm afraid you'll need to elaborate. Do you mean how Noire and I caused you to...?"

IF's eyes widened. No, she didn't mean that! She was trying to _change_ the subject, not stick to it even more!

"N-N-N-No! I meant the first scene! How you two opened this!" Shaking her head furiously, IF shot a look Black Heart's way. The other CPU seemed to be none the wiser, as she was currently engaged in some kind of conversation with her sister, but IF almost felt like she _knew_ all the same. Glancing back towards Purple Heart, IF frowned. "You got poor Histoire all worked up over it, and made yourselves out to look like... like..."

IF realized that she had nothing to finish that with. It was just so... It felt like just a little while ago Neptune was coming to her for advice and Neptune hadn't even known what she was feeling, and now here she had gone and totally surpassed IF... What was she supposed to do with that...?

"Like... the married couple that we _are_?" Purple Heart supplied innocently. IF was silent. What could she say to that? It was true, after all. Purple Heart didn't especially want to push the subject further either, but it seemed poor Iffy was feeling conflicted over how things had developed while she hadn't been looking. She supposed she could understand that.

Looking between her two friends, or rather, her goddess and her girlfriend, Compa was at a loss. This conversation was... strange, to say the least, and more than that, it was starting to sound like something better left for the main story! Why were they doing it here when they should have been having fun and enjoying the party?

It was time for this nurse to deliver to these girls their medicine!

"You two, I think that's enough." Compa's interjection brought both goddess and girl's attention where they should have been, which was something Compa found herself quite thankful for. "This is supposed to be a party, right? Why don't we do some party things instead of have these silly serious talks? Come on, IF, let's dance...!"

"W-Wait, Compa, I don't even know this song...!"

Purple Heart laughed quietly as Compa pulled IF out onto the dance floor. There weren't many couples out there at the moment, considering her and Noire's entrance had temporarily halted things. The only pair out there now that she had been paying attention to prior to her friends heading out had been Peashy and Plutia trying to slow dance to a song that was not at all slow in any way whatsoever.

"That's Plutie for you..." the goddess murmured to herself after checking up on that slow dance situation again (Peashy was clearly starting to get very frustrated, whereas Plutia looked like she was falling asleep on her feet — the other Noire was, of course, watching a short ways away, torn between jealousy and amusement at watching Plutia in such a predicament), shaking her head as she returned her gaze to IF and Compa.

It was an initially awkward affair. They clearly hadn't done too much dancing, at least not in a crowd like this in clothes like those, but they were both clearly enjoying themselves — and, as they continued dancing, each other more and more as they danced. A soft smile graced Purple Heart's lips as she watched them, knowing from experience that at this point, they had probably long since forgotten that there were people in this enormous room besides the two of them.

They danced and danced and danced. Purple Heart wasn't sure for how long they had been going, but already a few songs had gone by — and they were having the times of their lives. She didn't mind being an observer for once either. There was a brief interruption when Peashy finally transformed into Yellow Heart to try to get one of her many "parents" to dance properly with her, but that only caused a little bit of a commotion — and luckily, Iris Heart did _not_ decide to make a special guest appearance for the occasion.

As things began to settle back down, more than a few pairs of eyes besides for Purple Heart's finally managed to pull away from the sight of IF and Compa being so happy together — or more specifically, the sight of IF being so happy with _someone other than the person looking herself_. It was later said that the owners of these pairs of eyes, a well known idol and even a _CPU_ among them, all of whom who supposedly had "proper" love interests in the main story, would leave the party early and be found later at a Rebooted and Unrequited Relationships Anonymous meeting. That, however, is a tale for another time.

"Well this is an odd way you're choosing to celebrate." Purple Heart didn't need to look at the owner of the voice the came from behind her to know that it was her wife speaking, still transformed if she had to guess from the tone. Purple Heart didn't take her eyes off of the dancing couple as Black Heart approached her, choosing to stand next to her. "Something particularly interesting about them that I'm missing? All I see is IF trying not to fall over herself."

"I'm just happy for them is all." Finally tearing her eyes away from the sight of her happy friends, Purple Heart looked to her side to see the person who had made her forget there was a world outside of the two of them on more than one occasion. "Is that a problem?"

"Wha-" Black Heart opened her mouth to retort, but seeing the expression on Purple Heart's face, she instead chose to close her mouth and glance away, a blush forming on her cheeks. She crossed her arms and shot a look towards the couple, still dancing, that Purple Heart had been so enamored with. "It's just... This is _our_ celebration, isn't it? Why focus so much on them when it's about you and me?"

Purple Heart chuckled.

"Is it, though?" She smirked knowingly at the confused look on Black Heart's face, but didn't do more — the CPU was clearly watching the dancing duo of IF and Compa more to appease Purple Heart than out of any real interest of her own, which was just amusing. "This isn't like our wedding celebration or anything of the sort. It's celebrating a year of this story, and _The Proposal_ as a whole, having been told for this long and for it continuing to be told. They're just as much a part of that whole as we are, aren't they?"

It was fun watching the gears turn, seeing the different thoughts going through Black Heart's mind so blatantly shown on her face.

"Yes... It _is_ primarily our story, but you know what?" Purple Heart returned her gaze to the two girls on the dance floor, who looked positively taken with their partner. She smiled at them, shaking her head and closing her eyes. "Even for the supporting roles, it's their story too. We're all only here because of this story, but... You and I have the whole story to have more moments. Maybe they do too, but who knows? They might never appear again for all I know." Opening her eyes once more, Purple Heart returned her gaze to IF and Compa. "Even if it's just this scene... I want this one to be for them. For once, I want to be part of _their_ supporting cast."

Black Heart was silent for a few moments. Purple Heart wasn't sure if Black Heart agreed with the sentiment, but with the scene ending in a few moments, it probably didn't matter at this point anyway.

"I guess... you really _can_ act like a main character sometimes... even if you're trying not to be right now."

Purple Heart was taken aback. Eyes widening ever so slightly, she offered her wife a smile. As the two looked at each other, Purple Heart found herself swallowing. She supposed it wouldn't hurt _too_ much if she just... leaned over a little and... maybe just gave Black Heart _one_ little kiss... Maybe another after that... That wouldn't be a problem, would it...?

As the music began to come to an end and one genre of music was being changed for another, still out on the dance floor, IF and Compa slowed to a stop. Both of them were looking radiant — feeling positively wonderful, and it was all IF could do to not grab her girlfriend right there and... well, do something to her! If only they were alone...! Then she would... She would hold Compa's hand! Yeah, she would hold the _heck_ out of Compa's hand! That's what she would do!

"Awww... Look, Iffy..." Compa pointed to something behind the blushing Leanbox native. More than happy to have a distraction, IF cast a glance over her shoulder, before turning back to Compa with a wry smile on her face, a smile that soon turned into laughter — one Compa returned with a giggle.

"Sheesh... Look at the two of them go... You'd think they'd let someone else get the spotlight once in a while. Well, it _is_ their party, so I guess there's no harm."

Looping her arm with IF's, Compa looked up at her surprised girlfriend brightly, an idea starting to form in her mind.

"Be careful what you wish for, Iffy."

IF didn't have time to ask what Compa meant by that. In fact, she didn't have time for much of anything at all — if IF wanted to see what it was like for the spotlight to be off of the CPUs, then Compa was more than willing to give her that chance and then some.

And that, ladies and gentlemen, was how Compa and IF finally shared their first kiss.

It was a moment during which all eyes were on the two of them. It was a moment that none of them would soon forget. It was a moment that...

"... is actually going to be forgotten at the end of this chapter by everyone but the audience faster than the first game was, but hey, who's keeping track of that?" White Heart held up her hands defensively at the glares those around her quickly gave her. What? It was true, darn it!

Despite that being as it was, the girls on the dance floor still looked like nothing else mattered in the world to them as they pulled away from each other. Whether it was retconned or not, this moment was still real as far as this moment mattered, and in this special moment, Compa and IF still didn't care one bit about anything other than each other.


	4. Anniversary Stage 3

"Wowzers... I coulda gotten _that_ if I had preordered this thing? Why didn't anyone tell me?! No fair!"

Sighing dramatically, Neptune lowered her head, her forehead coming to a shameful rest on the desk she was seated at. Now that the more festive parts of the chapter were out of the way, she was taking advantage of its... less than logical approach of things to do some much needed research. How could she keep up with the times if she was stuck in a ficfantion world for a whole year?!

"I can't _believe_ I missed out on that... I should get a lawyer or something so I don't have to give up stuff like this when I'm 'filming' the story..." Groaning, Neptune sat up and leaned back in her chair, a pout plain as day on her face. This stunk! She wanted that limited edition figure! It wasn't like she was crazy like Vert or anything and needed to have hug pillows of Noire all over the place like Vert did of Nepgear ("Note to self: Go to Vert's place with a flamethrower later." ... "Second note to self: Make sure none of those pillows are actually Nep Jr. first."), but... But this one was special! Because... Because...!

"Wha- Is that _me_!?"

Crying out in surprise, Neptune leaned too far back to see the approaching person and, along with her precariously positioned chair, toppled backwards and onto the floor... which led to a follow up cry — this one a cry of _pain_.

"It _is_ me..." Paying no attention to her wife, who was crumpled on the floor in a pile of painfully painful... pain, Noire stepped over Neptune to look at the CPU's computer screen — or more particularly, what Neptune had been looking at. As Neptune slowly began sitting up and returning her chair to its proper position (no thanks to Noire standing in the way now), she was nearly knocked over again when the black haired CPU stepped backwards after reading a particularly shocking phrase on the computer. "Wait... Does this say what I think it does...?"

Too little too late did Neptune realize that she had made a horrible mistake in leaving that screen open for Noire to see.

"_I_ got a game?! I _finally_ got a game?!" Had Noire looked that happy about_ anything else in the entire universe_, Neptune would have been delighted to see that expression on her wife's face. But this was the main character position they were talking about! It was Neptune's livelihood! This was what separated her from the likes of the twins or Arfoire or that guy they made the death flag joke about back in the first game! "When did this happen?! While we were doing the story? Oh, I even got a cute little figure! Look at that, look, it's a little _me_!"

That little Noire figure happened to be the exact thing Neptune was complaining about missing out on being able to order for herself, but she supposed at this point there wasn't any way of telling Noire that. In fact, for the sake of her pride, there was no way she could even let Noire know that she had wanted a little bitty Noire to have all to herself at all! She would never live it down!

"I guess it is _kind of_ cute... If you're into that sort of thing..." Neptune coughed into her hand as she tried to straighten herself again. Hopefully they could change the subject to a different game before things got too out of hand. Plus, she could still order one of those figures from a scalper if she got this scene over with and Noire out of here if she moved it along fast enough!

"I can't wait to see what it's like... Look, I even got my own cast of characters, just for me!" Noire was practically sparkling at this point — Neptune wondered if Noire had gotten so excited about this discovery that she'd forgotten Neptune was there. Knowing Noire... Yeah, there was no way she remembered that she wasn't alone right now. "Hah! I even get a special _strategy_ battle system, with all kinds of special features the regular games don't get! Now let's see just what those are..."

Neptune swallowed as Noire began to go from screen to screen. Any second now, she would see just what happened with those new characters. Knowing that what she was seeing right know was essentially a ticking time bomb, Neptune could only watch with morbid fascination as her wife scrolled down the page... until she finally saw it.

"... Wait... Hold on a minute... Why am I...? I... I wouldn't..."

There it was.

"W-Wait... I... Am I... Am I seriously...?"

3... 2... 1...

"W-W-W-Why am I k-k-k-k-_kissing_ everyone!? I don't even _know_ any of these..." Eyes wide, Noire slowly turned her head. Her eyes were watering and her lower lip was trembling, both in an almost comical sort of way, and her face was bright red. There was no question about it now. She had _totally_ forgotten Neptune had been watching her — and, more importantly, she had totally forgotten Neptune could see everything on the screen right now. "_Why were you looking at this!?_"

Was that steam coming out of her ears? Oh shoot, it was, wasn't it?

"I-I'm sure it's just marketing junk, Noire! Remember how those Lily Rank things never turned out to be anything special...?!" Slowly backing up, Neptune raised her hands in front of her and forced a smile onto her face. She had to cool the situation down — if nothing else, she needed to make Noire not want to break that figure on sight if she managed to get it! "It's probably just totally stupid stuff that doesn't matter!"

For some reason, that didn't seem to make Noire feel any better.

"Oh, so the two of _us_ actually kissing in a game is just stupid stuff that doesn't matter?" Noire's voice was lower now, and Neptune remembered that she was in that game too — she'd sort of blocked it out of her memory after seeing Vert and Blanc leaning in so that they could_ kiss her wife_ and all. Somebody get her some brain bleach! "W-Well, then maybe I'll go see if someone else would prefer getting kissed by me from now on if you think it doesn't matter..."

Wait... This wasn't surprise or anger anymore...

This was an attitude that Neptune was much more capable of dealing with out of Noire...

It was _tsun_!

Finding herself grinning, Neptune held up a finger.

"You've got it all wrong, Easy Heart! I only meant for those other hussies!" It was really hard not to laugh at the horrified look on Noire's face at her latest nickname from Neptune, but Neptune managed to keep it together. "And just to show you I mean it, I'll prove it to you!"

And without waiting a moment more, Neptune took a bold step forward and gave Noire a passionate kiss that she wouldn't soon forget.

... Mainly because the Noire she was kissing was the one on her computer screen.

"See?" Wiping her lips triumphantly, Neptune offered Noire the peace sign with her fingers and placed her free hand on her hip. The black haired CPU had calmed down by this point, thankfully, which finally left Neptune the chance she had been waiting for. "Come on, you got a game, didn't you? It's still _my_ series, but you shouldn't be picky about that right now, 'cause you _did_ still get a starring role, right? So be happy! Live a little!"

"I... I guess..." Resigning herself to her newfound calling as the franchise's harem protagonist, Noire returned to the computer screen. Grimacing at the slobber Neptune had left on it ("Did you use your _tongue_ on it?!" "My computer and I have been through a lot together, Noire! A workaholic like you... couldn't _possibly_ understand our relationship." "Ew. Just... ew, Neptune."), the CPU wiped it off and pulled over a second chair so they could look at the information together. Already, she was started to perk back up — after all, she had a game! Smiling at her wife, she patted the chair next to her. "Are you coming? I want to see the rest of this! You've only looked at this one so far, right? There's still more stuff about this one I want to see, then we can look at _your_ games. So come on, or I'll go start the next scene without you."

As she nodded glumly, Neptune bit her lip. Her wife looked so excited, so happy, so thrilled...

There was still one more big part of her game that she hadn't found out about yet. If she thought having a harem of pretty girls was something to blow up over (Neptune supposed she could understand that — she couldn't even joke about wanting a harem of just Noire considering she actually did know two), imagine if she saw... _That_!

She couldn't ruin it! She just couldn't! She had to stop Noire from finding out about _that_ part of the game! For the sake of Noire's happiness! Ignorance truly was bliss after all!

"Hey, there's other games that have come out too y'know." Neptune oh-so-innocently said, doing her absolute best to act as though she didn't have any reason at all for trying to change the subject except to check out all of the other exciting new games in their series before the scene ended on them. "Why don't we move this along?"

Frowning, Noire considered refusing Neptune's request... But given everything Neptune had been through over the past month... or year... or however long it had been, she supposed it wasn't particularly considerate of her to be rubbing this in her wife's face. Besides, she could always find out about it all herself when the characters inevitably got written into the story anyway, couldn't she...?

... Like _that_ could ever happen... There was no _way_ any of those characters would ever be appearing in any kind of story any time soon, was there? And who knew if they'd even still be at this "story" thing by the time that was even possible?

"Fine, fine..." Sighing, Noire leaned away from the keyboard and mouse to let Neptune take over control of things as she had had before Noire had arrived. "So? What's the next one? Are you the main character of all of the other ones?"

"I dunno yet, dummy. _Someone_ interrupted me before I could look." Neptune stuck her tongue out at Noire, causing the other CPU to sigh in half-exasperation and half-reluctant amusement. As she looked at the purple haired girl next to her, looking for the world like she had never had a problem in her life, an odd thought crossed her mind as she watched Neptune return to the computer to start finding out what the other games were.

"You know... This reminds me of one of the scenes we lost that didn't get to make it into the final story. Remember, after the file- I-I mean, uh, the _film_ got corrupted and we had to go on hiatus for those few months?" Noire remarked thoughtfully, starting to blush as she recalled the exact context of the scene in question. After all, it _had_ been the original "morning after" scene... "I-It was the one where you were teasing me, so I stuck my tongue out at you... a-and then you told me to..."

Noire swallowed. Even if it hadn't happened in the story proper, there was no way Neptune could have forgotten what she was referring to, especially after those details, few as they were.

"Well... Y-You know, Neptune. That one."

"I like the new one better." Now it was Noire's turn to nearly fall out of her seat, though in her case, it would have been out of complete and total surprise. Neptune hadn't given that comment any thought whatsoever! It was like she had already decided before Noire had even brought it up!

"B-But it wasn't as... You know!" Lastation's CPU waved her arms frantically, trying to get her point across. Noire couldn't believe this! Was she _really_ the more perverted one out of the two of them!? What would people _think_ if that got out...? She was still no Vert at least, but still...! "Y-Y-You didn't have any problems _then_!"

Stopping what she was doing on the computer, Neptune turned to look at Noire with a face that make Noire feel like she had just told Neptune people die when they are killed.

It was an expression that could be summarized with a single word: _Duh_.

"Of course I didn't _then_. But the new one was more..." Noire was waiting on pins and needles for Neptune's explanation, expecting something ridiculous... but to her surprise, Neptune started blushing. "I mean... The punchline still got in, didn't it? It was just the tongue part just got cut out... And most of the setup... And the touching... O-Okay, it _did_ get changed a little more than just that, but the punchline stayed, so that's what counts, right? This way, the way it is now, it was more about the two of us — well, mostly me, because I'm awesome, but there was some of you too — instead of just us waking up and being naked so we could lead up to a dirty joke and some action. It was, ya know... more personal."

Seeing the way Neptune was trying so desperately not to look at her, but at the same time trying to catch a glimpse of her reaction to see if she was saying something right or wrong or totally ridiculous, Noire could have kissed her right there. In fact... She probably would once they could get a break between scenes with them in it... They weren't in the next one, were they...?

"A-Anyway, the page loaded a while ago, so let's see what we got here!" Completely oblivious to the plans Noire was already cooking up for them and more than ready to change the subject from her embarrassing admission, Neptune looked at the screen — and what she saw made her gasp before she started pointing excitedly at the images on her screen. "Holy Histy! Check it out, look look look-! _Remakes_! We're in the big leagues now, Noire! There are actually people out there who are actually paying to do the same stuff all over again now that they like us so much!"

Noire fought back the urge to sigh.

"Neptune, that's what _ports_ are, remakes are games that are _remade_. Like how you went from being based off of some silly made up water god to being based off of a game system."

For a moment, Neptune stopped to consider this. Not only was that comment _really_ meta, especially for Noire...

"But... I'm pretty sure that's nothing like a _game_ remake like these two are, Noire. Gosh, don't you know _anything_ about making games? Maybe I should've asked someone else to help me out with the new console..."

"O-Oh, just shut up and tell me about it!" Crossing her arms in frustration, Noire looked away, her cheeks burning in embarrassment at having blown such a simple comparison despite having slipped in such a clever reference. "Or do you need help with that too?"

Neptune wanted to comment on the "too" Noire had added there, like she was implying Neptune couldn't have read about Noire's game without help, but she decided against it. She was never going to get to order that figure if she kept dragging this out!

So instead, she decided to skim over the stuff about the exciting game developments and get it over with as quickly as she possibly could.

"I do _not_ need help! Especially not from kissy face over here." Ignoring Noire's spluttered reaction to "kissy face," Neptune began opening up some pictures to show that she knew what she was talking about. Once she was done, Neptune gestured to her screen and looked at Noire pointedly. She had to move this along! "It's like you said, they remade the first game, but since the second one's remake is... Noire?"

For some inexplicable reason, Noire seemed pretty taken by the images on her screen. Frowning, Neptune turned around to see what exactly it was she had opened — she hadn't really looked at any of it in much detail prior to clicking on everything, she'd just opened up the relevant looking pictures and figured it would get the job done fine. Apparently it was getting the job done a bit _too_ fine, which meant she should probably look herself... When she realized just what it was that she was seeing, however...

"W-Wait a second! They didn't just remake this!" Shoving Noire aside, despite the fact that Noire wasn't even in her way, Neptune pressed her face to the computer screen, as if this method of "zooming in" would somehow reveal the hidden truth behind the strange change in available characters and new scenes that she was witnessing in the screenshots. "Where are... And why are... What _happened_ to everybody?"

"Obviously..." Sighing in annoyance, Noire grabbed Neptune by the back of her hoodie and yanked her backwards so she could get a better look at the screen again herself. Neptune let out a muffled cry of "oof!" as her back connected with her seat, but Noire paid her no mind as she looked over the images. "... They had to make some changes. I don't know _why_, but I guess sacrifices had to be made for the greater good."

Noire shrugged, taking the tried and true "it can't be helped" position. Neptune could only gape at what she was implying.

"But... They sacrificed _Nisa_! She's a walking embodiment of 'the greater good' if half the stuff she says is true! And Gust was an inspiration to scalpers and price gougers everywhere, so that's... sort of a greater good too, right?" Neptune seemed genuinely flummoxed. After all, these were her friends that just... didn't exist anymore, as far as this remake was concerned — as far as _she_ was concerned in this remake! "Wait a second, 5pb. isn't here either... That's totally weird, Noire! Why would they leave everybody out like that? And look at this one, MAGES. is saying she's from... here...? I don't get it! Does that mean we have to include the remake's world in the story now? That's gonna be way too complicated!"

"You know, you're not making much of an argument for RED..." Noire commented dryly. Not that she really knew any of these people as well as Neptune did — or was it "had" now? — but she still found it strange that one was just being so readily overlooked compared to the others. Had something happened between the two of them? This could be interesting...

"The less competition we have, the better. Besides, she's been gone for, like, _a million years_ already, so this is completely different." Neptune's response was oddly dismissive, not to mention her wording revealed something... interesting about what kind of priorities Neptune might have had regarding their fellow cast members. Maybe Neptune had been more bothered about what they'd seen in Noire's game than Noire had thought...? Noire had to admit, she didn't mind. "Oh hey, look! They made Histy playable! I gotta send her a picture!"

Noire fought the urge to roll her eyes as she watched Neptune excitedly snap pictures of the computer screen with her phone, then happily chatter away as she sent the picture to her Oracle. Didn't the CPU realize she could have just sent the article itself to the fairy?

"You said they remade the second game too? I want to see what they did to that." Interrupting Neptune's silly one-sided conversation with the text message she was writing to Histoire, Noire leaned over and started clicking around. She had to admit, this _was_ kind of exciting... N-Not because _she_ cared or anything. More and more people being invested in them meant more shares, if nothing else!

Noire's thoughts came to a halt when she caught sight of the character list of the second game's remake. Immediately, she turned her head to the side and tried not to laugh, resulting in a stifled snort.

Right there on the screen, taking the place of Nisa, was RED.

So much more "less competition."

Deciding that maybe that was a discussion better left for later — or never, that worked too — Noire closed out of the page showing the remakes and looked to see what else there was, if anything. She was surprised that Neptune hadn't gone straight to whatever new main game there was... Was there not one? That could be something to worry about! Looking at the consoles the previous ones had been on, it really didn't look like anything was happening... Maybe they were moving to handhelds? That would make Uni happy at least...

Catching sight of a link with a name that she didn't recognize, Noire let out a sigh of relief.

"'Action'... 'U'...? I don't get it. Why can't they make titles that make sense?" Tilting her head curiously, Noire opened up the first page that came up with the game's name, just as Neptune raised her head from her cell phone to look at the screen.

At once, they both found themselves staring at screenshots of the new game.

Screenshots featuring their younger sisters.

Normally, this wouldn't be that big of a deal. After all, it was always great seeing their sisters in action in the games!

However, _normally_ they didn't randomly see their sisters with their clothes ripping off and in such _poses_ like the way they were on the screen.

For a moment, the two CPUs were silent. Noire had found herself going pale, while Neptune was just... silent.

Too silent.

Nervously looking at her wife, Noire offered the other CPU a smile. Neptune continued to be silent as she stared at the screen, her expression was unreadable, and this concerned Noire, who was looking at Neptune and Neptune alone. Ignoring Neptune's clicking of the mouse, she decided that a game about stripping their sisters was definitely _not_ one they wanted to be involved with, and so slowly but surely, she reached for the mouse.

After all, Neptune's sister had been through so much! That was probably not at _all_ the kind of thing Neptune wanted to see! Why had a game like this even been made?! Honestly, no offense to Marvy, but she hoped to never meet someone who would want such a-

"We're in it too."

Upon seeing the images that Neptune had pulled up on the screen while she had been looking away, Noire's change in reaction towards this new game was instantaneous. Her cheeks starting to darken at the sight of her wife in such a... delightfully _compromising_ position, she found herself standing up immediately, unable to meet Neptune's gaze. She just knew one thing and one thing only.

"I... I j-just remembered, I need to make a phone call."

To Noire's great humiliation, Neptune simply grinned at her before offering her a thumbs up.

"No need, Pervy Heart! I just ordered two copies."

Noire couldn't believe what Neptune was accusing her of! Her cheeks burning even brighter, the CPU crossed her arms and turned to the wall, giving it a ferocious glare. T-The nerve of her! She had been... She had just been going to call Kei to see if she could stop production of this horrendous title, t-that was all! She _certainly_ didn't want that... that _peep show_ of a game!

"Hmph! I wasn't going to order it, because I don't want that at all! I would _never_ want to have a game where I could strip you and play with you and make you dress up for me so I could take your clothes off again whenever I wanted! T-That sounds like a horrible game! Maybe like the worst game in the world even!" Despite the fact that she wasn't fooling anyone, least of all herself, Noire still wasn't willing to admit that she wanted the game in question for reasons that were, well... Less than savory.

Neptune considered her options. She could try to make a joke about how she was getting the copy for someone else and tease Noire about it until she admitted that she really _did_ want the game, _or_...

Her eyes lit up when the perfect response came to her.

Oh, she liked that option _much_ more.

"I guess that makes sense..." Sighing in defeat, Neptune slumped down into her seat, catching Noire by surprise. She was the picture of loss at that moment. She just hoped Noire wouldn't catch on too soon.

"Well, of course it does — I said it after all." Noire added confidently, glad that she was apparently getting off the hook this easily. Maybe it was because Neptune had admitted to wanting the game herself as well? Though that kind of thing was to be expected from Neptune, wasn't it?

Neptune grinned inwardly. It looked like Noire had taken the bait. Now to finish her off and cue the perfect ending to this scene.

"Yeah, I mean..." Now that the time was right, the CPU turned to look at Noire, a smile that looked more appropriate on a Z-18 rated game's cover than on Neptune's sweet little face. "A game that's just about doing the things you can do whenever you want in real life probably _would_ be boring, huh? You might as well just do it in real life."

"_Boring_? What are you..." Initially, Noire was confused. Then she started to feel defensive — so what if she wanted that game? It wasn't like Neptune hadn't wanted it too! She couldn't talk! In fact, she'd just gone and ordered the thing with no shame at all!

But then Neptune's words sunk in. She realized exactly what Neptune was saying. Particularly the "what you can do in real life" "whenever you want" parts.

The images on the computer completely forgotten, Noire found herself interested in a very different sort of image now... though ironically, it was really exactly the same image that she was interested in getting from the game — in a manner of speaking.

"I... T-That's right. Actually, I think I want to play that 'game' right now."

As Neptune made cat calls while Noire descended on her in order to silence her in the way they both enjoyed most, for the sake of the children, the scene began to fade to black.

Sadly, Neptune never did get to order that little Noire figure.


	5. Anniversary Stage 4

It was a peaceful day in the land that was formerly known as Eden. Ever since the nation's one CPU had left the land and become Planeptune's fourth CPU at the time of Eden's collapse (now only the second), the "nation" wasn't really much to look at anymore, and most of the time, the name it had now tended to be forgotten by even those living there. So they chose to simply refer to it as home.

Among those few residents of this land was a rather infamous character who went by the name Anonydeath. Not many had seen this person, but the rumor went that this "Anonydeath" was the most beautiful maiden in all the land. Her beauty could send even the CPUs themselves into fits of envious rage, and one look at her would make a man happy for the rest of his life. That was how beautiful the fabled Anonydeath was.

Of course, little did these people know that that rumor had been started by Anonydeath _him_self — naturally, that meant they also had no idea that the person in question was a _him_ as well. Though as far as the armored villain was concerned, his heart was that of princess'.

Brighter viewers of Gamindustri might be wondering: Why does _any_ of this matter when Anonydeath is such a minor character in this tale?

Because the ever adorable Peashy is paying her "papa" a visit and sleeping over on this fine evening, that's why! Now stop asking questions!

It had been a peaceful visit thus far, at least as peaceful as visits with a pint-sized powerhouse like Peashy could be, but now that it was wrapping up for the night, the man in pink armor was tucking in the little girl — as he and the child's "mother" had done many times during their reign over Eden while the girl had been brainwashed. Despite the fact that the girl was under no such control now, she would still return to him for these little playdates all the same, as she had today, like he really had become a father figure to her. Of course, the poor thing was probably nearing having a half dozen substitute parents at this point, truth be told, so it really wasn't all that special.

Still... It was why he made the special exception to let her know where his "secret lair" was — and surprisingly, she had yet to tell anyone about it. Considering what a white van scenario that was, even he had to give her credit. She was probably just that confident in her ability to stop him if he should ever try anything, him being such a devious person and all. At least, that's what he would say were he ever asked.

In reality, he just _might_ have been... touched by the girl's feelings and her good heart being willing to look past all of the things he had done to her and to many of the other people she cared about in order to spend time with her "papa." For someone like that, considering he could count the people he regularly interacted with outside of his fellow Seven Sages on one hand, that was... well, it was something is what it was.

Oh _goodness_! No wonder he hadn't gotten a callback for appearing in any of the new games! _Listen_ to him! He was going soft!

Shaking his armored head, Anonydeath set those silly thoughts to the side as he finished pulling up the covers over the little girl's small torso. She seemed relatively appeased by this, so figuring his job done for the evening, the maiden-at-heart turned to leave after wishing the little girl a good night.

But how on a moment. If the scene were to end here, why, there wouldn't have been a scene at all, now would there?

"Papa! Tell me a story!" The little blonde's cry was enough to halt Anonydeath in his tracks almost instantly. Raising his eyebrow underneath his power suit, the man in pink slowly turned back to the bed in which little Peashy was supposed to be going to sleep. What he saw instead, however, was the face of a child that was very clearly wide awake. "I wanna hear a story!"

"A story, hmmmmm...?" Tapping his chin thoughtfully, the beautiful maiden wondered just what sort of a story he even could tell this little bundle of energy. Anything exciting would get her wanting to play, after all, and he didn't particularly fancy the idea of Peashy bouncing all over his laboratory for a few more hours. Even he had his limits. Though he did remember that Peashy had been _very_ excited about the events of the other world, going so far as to tell him all about what she thought "Neptuna" must be up to. If that kind of thing interested her, then maybe... "I know! We're going to hear a _love_ story tonight."

The little CPU opened her mouth wide, forming an "o" of surprise at the revelation of the genre her bedtime tale would be taking. A _love_ story? Like _Neptuna's_?

"I see you're interested!" Good, good! This would be easier than Anonydeath thought. "I have to warn you, this is a very special story. It's the original version of _this_ story, in fact! It's a story that only a very select, very special, very _few_ people know... Are you sure you want to know it? Once I tell you, you can't _un_know it."

Peashy's eyes were as wide as they possibly could be as she heard these mystical words. How could he even ask her that? Of _course_ she wanted to hear this story! She had to! She had to she had to she _had_ to!

"Tell me! Hurry! Hurry up! I wanna hear it now!" Kicking her arms and legs in excitement, the little CPU smiled happily at the armored man at the end of her bed, eagerly awaiting the story she was about to hear. She might know something no one else in her whole universe did! Besides Papa anyway.

"Settle _down_, Peashy, and I will." Placing a hand on his hip, Anonydeath raised a brow beneath his armor — an action that went completely unnoticed by little Peashy, for obvious reasons — and waited for the little girl to calm herself. However, as that, well... didn't normally ever happen, Anonydeath cut his losses and pulled up a chair next to the bed before she decided to beat the story out of him. She probably could, after all. "Okay, are you ready?"

"Uh huh!" Nodding furiously, Peashy tugged her covers up all the way to her nose to show just how ready she was to hear the story, which earned her a light chuckle from Anonydeath.

"In that case..." Clearing his throat and crossing one pink armored leg over the other, Anonydeath began his wonderful tale.

"Once upon a time, there was a wonderful, magical land, a land where anyone could be anything they wanted to be, and everyone was beautiful. _Everyone_. This land was called Gamindustri, and it was divided into a handful of nations that liked to compete for dominance and... Well, you know all of this boring background stuff pretty well already, so I'm going to skip ahead, okay honey?"

"'Kay!" Peashy was quite thankful for the offer and more than eager to take Anonydeath up on it. If he had taken too long to get to the good part, she would've probably wanted to go home and have Plutia tell her a story instead!

"Good girl. Now, where was I? Oh, yes! One day, the most beautiful CPU in all of the land got a call from one of the Oracles of the other nations. Can you guess what happened, Peashy? Their nation was in trouble! The Oracle was a serious type, but she knew when she was beat and she wanted to cut a deal with the CPU she was calling..." Anonydeath laughed. "Can you guess what the difference was in this story, Peashy? It was _Lastation_ calling for help instead of _Planeptune_! Isn't that an _exciting_ twist?"

"I-It is!" Peashy clapped her hands over her mouth to hide her gasp. So it wasn't Neptuna who was in trouble originally? And it was actually her who went _to_ help another CPU? That... made... _so much sense_! "Keep going, Papa, keep going! I wanna get to the good parts now!"

"We'll get there, we'll get there...!" Sighing in amusement, Anonydeath cleared his throat and straightened up in his seat, uncrossing and then recrossing his legs. How exciting this was! "As I was saying, the most beautiful CPU in all of the land was personally asked to assist the- Well, you know I'm talking about _Noire_ now, don't you? Of course you do. So the beautiful, gorgeous, _maidenly_ CPU was requested to save the day. Naturally, the only way that this could be done was through a _wedding_, and the CPU, pure and virgi- I mean, kind that she was, was only so, so willing to don her prettiest dress to go be with Noire."

Peashy's brows started to furrow as the armored man went on and on about the beauty of the CPU that Noire's Oracle had gone straight to for help.

Papa wasn't making this up... Was he? This story was almost starting to sound... No no, it couldn't be!

"The two nations got preparations ready right away. They knew they had no time at _all_ to waste to get the wedding of the century going. Sadly, now that she knew the wedding was coming up, Noire's health began to worsen... She realized she simply couldn't _live_ without the beautiful CPU of Eden!" Anonydeath clapped his arms together, sighing wistfully. Unfortunately, this just confused Peashy even more... though it _did_ explain his earlier flattering of the character in the story, or so she thought.

"I don't wanna do that! I don't wanna marry her! Never ever!" Sitting up in bed, the former CPU of Eden cried out her rejection of this story with a swift denial of this horrible reality. She could never accept that! Across reality, not one, but _two_ Noires found themselves feeling like they had just been punched in the gut for reasons they couldn't possibly explain. "Change it!"

Anonydeath simply tilted his head, as if he didn't understand what Peashy was so upset about.

"Don't be silly, Peashy. _I'm_ the CPU of Eden in this story."

"... Papa..."

"Hmmm? Well, I _told_ you it would be surpisi... Wait, hold on Peashy! I know a different story, I can tell you that instead! Let's not be-"

Whatever Anonydeath said next was drowned out by the following explosion caused by Yellow Heart's fists of fury. Ironically, that burst of energy was just enough to put the little CPU to sleep, and as the smoke cleared, Anonydeath found himself facing not the angry form of Yellow Heart denied the bedtime story she wanted, but little Peashy, fast asleep at his feet.

That evening, while Peashy was fast asleep in _his_ bed, Anonydeath finally remembered why his lair was supposed to be a _secret_ one.

And yet... He supposed a little excitement once in a while wouldn't kill him, would it?

... Would it?

Anonydeath sighed and cast a wistful look towards the ceiling. Despite the explosion, it had remained unbroken... The armored maiden wasn't sure if he was okay with that or not.

"If only we had gone through with the original plan for this scene... Shy little Noire could have been the one to interrupt my _perfect_ story instead of this happening. I can't believe they didn't even include me in her game. You know, I think it's about time that I get myself a real lawyer..."


	6. Anniversary Stage 5

"3... 2... 1... You're live, Lady Green Heart!"

The Vert of the other dimension nodded towards the camera, a pleasant smile on her face. She had been waiting for a long time to be able to make this special appearance — she hadn't gotten a chance in the main story, being a character _currently_ more minor than Nisa's cup size, after all, but she'd hijacked the set and now nothing would stop her from her big moment! This might be the only chance she had to make everyone out there watching more interested in _her_ story!

"Hello, everyone!" Waving politely at her viewers, Vert placed her hands on her lap. She was wearing her best dress, wearing her best smile, on her best behavior, and doing her best in every other respect to not ruin this moment. "While I know this may come as a bit of a surprise, seeing as I haven't appeared much in this lovely little story so far, I thought it would be nice to let you lovely people in on what I've been up to behind the scenes. It's nothing too interesting, but who knows? Maybe you'll like what you'll see and just _maybe_ you'll want to see more of it! Won't this be fun?"

As she spoke, Vert picked up a remote that was placed on the desk before her. It was a simple remote, meant for managing projectors and the like, and it was in fact connected to one such projector at this very moment. With her time to shine finally here, Vert raised the remote and hit the power button. The device flickered to life, and behind her, an image appeared, projected onto the screen behind her.

"As you can see, this is me on my vacation." Setting the remote down, Vert held up a hand behind her to put proper focus on the image on the screen behind her. It was naturally a picture of herself, as were most of the pictures that she planned on showing during this groundbreaking segment she had planned. This one in particular was a rather _saucy_ one in which she was at the beach getting a tan — she was even face down on her towel with her top undone, showing off her bare back to all who might be watching! How _scandalous_! "I'm such a busy CPU, doing so many exciting things so _much_ of the time, that being able to take time off was a pleasant change of pace. However..."

Gently picking up the remote again, Vert tapped the button that would change the image on screen. The next picture was again focusing on Vert's bare back, but the situation in this picture couldn't be more different than in the previous one. Between the first picture and this new one, it appeared as though a pack of dogoos had appeared, one snatching away Vert's bikini top and dashing off while the rest appared to be trying to assist in the bikini thief's escape by blocking Vert.

Vert resisted smiling to herself as she heard the various gasps from the people in the studio. Of course they were surprised! While they had all been watching Neptune and Noire beat around the bush for 50 chapters, with Vert's counterpart even getting dragged down into it, _this_ Vert had been _almost completely naked and running around the beach_! Look at what they were missing out on!

Already, things were going according to plan for Vert.

It was only a matter of time now before her spinoff was announced...

"O-Oh my, I didn't remember this picture being so _showy_!" Lie that it was, not a single person called her on it, for Vert looked for the world like she was just as surprised as everyone else was at the events being portrayed in the picture. Sure, Neptune and Noire had their bits of nudity from time to time, but did they have the body to make it count? No, they certainly did not. "Let's change this to a different one! I don't want anyone getting the wrong idea, after all..."

The truth was, of course, that that was _exactly_ what Vert wanted.

"Let's see what was next..." Pressing the button ever so gently so that her show could proceed, Vert let out a gasp and quickly hit the button again before anyone, even the narration and her internal dialogue, could make heads or tails of what kind of image it was that she had shown. That one really _wasn't_ supposed to be in there... Luckily it had only been up for a second...! "Er... Oopsie! We're just having a little technically difficulty over here. Now, here I am after dealing with those pesky dogoos, enjoying a tasty drink on the boardwalk..."

Despite the fact that Vert was showing another interesting picture about her exciting vacation, it appeared as though the people in the studio were much more interested in trying to figure out what they had seen during that brief second in which a picture Lady Green Heart hadn't intended for them to see had been on screen. Even the camerawoman wasn't paying attention anymore — luckily for Vert, there was only one camera she needed to look at, or this could have gotten messy fast.

Vert was starting to get nervous. She reached for a conveniently placed glass of water and took a drink of it as she continued narrating, telling the exciting story about how her innocent lunch had turned into a life-or-death battle fought with chopsticks and a cookie. Despite the thrilling story and matching pictures, people clearly were more interested in what she _hadn't_ intended to show... This wasn't good at all! No one was supposed to know about that, at least not yet! But how had it gotten in there?

"A-Anyway, enough about that girl and her chopsticks, let's move on, shall we?" Vert clapped her hands, a bit more loudly than one might have expected, in the hopes that it would get the attention of those around her. She couldn't even _imagine_ what was going on online right now. If anyone had been able to get a screenshot of that picture... "Now, this next one is a favorite of mine, but it's especially risque, so good little boys and girls should make sure their mommies and daddies aren't watching if they want to see, okay?"

Winking at the camera, as if to show any concerned parents it wasn't going to be all _that_ bad, Vert pressed the button to signal the next picture... and all hell broke loose.

"Here we have me at the hot springs. As you can see, I..." Vert was holding her hand up to display the "goods" on the screen, sure that showing such a tantalizing image would be more than enough to seduce anyone over to her side from Neptune and Noire's. To her surprise, however, the cries that erupted were ones that were _definitely_ not ones reacting to a simple screenshot of an obligatory hot springs scene.

"I _knew_ it!"

"Impossible!"

"It _was_ Lady White Heart!"

"I refuse to believe it!"

"You can't deny the proof! It's right there!"

"But... Lady White Heart... And Lady Green Heart...? How could this be...?"

"Makes sense to me."

"That's impossible! Everyone knows Lady White Heart lusts after Lady Iris-"

"_Be quiet!_ Do you want to get us killed!?"

As the studio erupted into chaos, Vert spun around to look at the screen behind her. The image that had been _supposed_ to appear was one that wasn't anything that deserved _this_ kind of outcry. For one thing, she was the only person in it! Why would she want to share the attention here with _Blanc_ of all people?! And now of all times...?!

"I-I see we're still having some technical difficulties then!" Forcing a laugh that still came out as sounding panicked, Vert quickly pushed the button in the hopes of switching to the image that was supposed to be next — but to her horror, _another_ image of her with Blanc appeared instead. She kept pushing buttons, but with every push, the images got worse and worse! Letting out a cry of frustration as the crowd of studio workers began taking pictures of the images on the screen, Vert finally flung the remote as hard as she could towards the projector, letting out a relieved sigh when the device exploded, taking out the images projected behind her with it. "T... There. There will be no more of that. I'll... I'll simply have to _describe_ my vacation from here on out, since my pictures were so _rudely_ tampered with!"

Vert did her best to collect herself — really, she did. Still... Her mind couldn't help but race, her heart couldn't help but pound as memories flashed through her mind. Things she had been holding back on for the sake of plot twists, things she had been pretended weren't there due to a night they had both regretted... The confused days that haad followed...!

Why was she being reminded of these things _now_?! This was not the time! How could this have happened?

"Unless..."

Could it be...? Had _Blanc_ figured out what Vert had been planning and slipped these pictures in in order to get in on her plan as well? But... That would be crazy! That really _wasn't_ supposed to be revealed until later on in the actual story! Was she really willing to spoil such an important plot point just so they could have more screentime earlier than planned...?!

As Vert mulled this over, it dawned on her why Blanc would do such a thing.

It was simple.

Vert hated knowing about future events in a story, so of course such a strategy wouldn't occur to her. But when it came to getting attention and attracting people to her side — to _their_ side?

This... This was _brilliant_!

She supposed she had little choice now. Maybe this had been Blanc's plan all along. If so, then well played, White Heart, _well played_! Vert puffed out her chest as she placed her hands on the table, standing up with a sense of urgency that, surprisingly, managed to surprise everyone in the room — perhaps even everyone watching at home through the still running cameras as well. The screeching her chair made probably didn't hurt either.

"Everyone! I have an announcement to make." Her words were spoken clearly and firmly. She was nervous about this, but she supposed she could get away with it here, since this chapter wasn't connected to the main story anyway. It wouldn't hurt things too much, would it? "I was hoping I wouldn't have to explain them, but... It appears I have no choice. This is about those pictures of myself and Bla... and Lady White Heart that you all just saw."

Sighing, Vert closed her eyes. There was no turning back now. She just hoped that this was what Blanc wanted of her. It had to be... Right?

"The truth is... Those were not fake. Those were not tampered with. The truth is that we have been lovers since shortly after the events of the third game." Ignoring the gasps and cries coming from everyone in the room, Vert put her hands together and in front of her and continued. For the sake of their screentime... If this was what Blanc wanted of her, then so be it! "We've kept it in hiding for a long time, keeping appearances and not wanting to start any international problems with Lastation or Planeptune, but this is the undeniable truth."

Vert looked away from the camera and the leering eyes of those in the studio as her cheeks began to burn, covering one cheek with a hand as she sighed. If Blanc had wanted to do it this way, why couldn't _she_ have come here to help? Honestly, that CPU could be such a character...

"Our love story was meant to take center stage in a later part of this story, and it was to be revealed bit by bit, but it appears as though I have no choice now but to reveal this to you all. I... I hope you aren't disappointed in us." Lowering her head, Vert placed her hands on her legs. It wouldn't do the two of them any good to upset the people they wanted backing them, after all. "Please forgive us for keeping this from you for so long!"

It didn't even take a full second for the people surrounding Vert in the studio to react. Tears in their eyes, they all began shaking their head furiously or pumping their fist in the air.

"We would never hold it against you!"

"May your love last forever!"

"Director, you owe me fifty bucks!"

"Forgive _us_ for reacting so badly, Lady Green Heart!"

"Let Lady White Heart know that we all approve of your everlasting relationship!"

"This is even better than my fanfiction!"

"Praise Lady Green Heart and Lady White Heart's love!"

"It's the union of the best of both worlds!"

Vert smiled a genuine smile as she raised her head, wiping the tears from her eyes as she looked over the cheering people. Who knew they would be so accepting? After all the worries she had seen displayed by her counterpart, she had been sure she would have...

"TANZERIN TROMBE!"

Frozen in place, Vert could only watch in horror as a familiar axe slammed down into the desk that she stood behind. As it burst into more pieces than she could ever possibly hope to count, she slowly began raising her hand as beads of sweat started rolling down her neck. She meant to signal the people behind the camera to stop the recording, but they were all cowering under tables now — the show would go on!

"I can't _believe_ you are seriously this _stupid_. Did you _really_ think I wouldn't see this before you finished filming this crap!?"

Vert swallowed as the source of the voice came into view and took her axe out of the remains of the desk.

This was no picture on a screen.

White Heart herself had arrived on scene.

"O-Oh, if it isn't Blanc..." Smiling hesitantly, Vert clapped her hands together and leaned to the side ever so slightly, in a pose that she _hoped_ was cute. Had Blanc not wanted their relationship exposed yet? Maybe those pictures really _had_ gotten into things by mistake? Whatever the case, Vert hoped the camera crew would take a hint and cut things off, but to no avail. "W... What brings you here?"

"What brings me here? What brings me here!?" The CPU's indignant voice was rivaled only by the sound her just retrieved axe made as she slammed it back into the ground in frustration. "How about all of this crap you're saying on _live TV_!? What the hell gives you the right to go around putting stuff like that on here!?"

"W-Well, I _thought_ it was what you _wanted_... _Darling_..." Vert swallowed. This was about to go downhill really fast and she needed to get to that camera. Slowly taking a step forward, Vert began making her way towards the device, its red light still blinking, signifying countless people were still viewing her even now. She didn't want them to witness the lover's spat that this was about to become!

Unfortunately, before Vert could get any further, White Heart's axe slammed down once more — this time directly in front of her.

"Cut the crap, Vert!" Hoisting her axe up into the air, White Heart pointed the weapon square in front of the CPU before her. The blonde flinched, but made no move to retreat or continue approaching the camera otherwise. "Maybe they can't see what you're up to, but you can't fool me!"

"M-My my, I have _no idea_ what you're talking about..." Despite her words, Vert was making a "cutting" motion with her hand against her neck, as if signaling for someone, _anyone_, to stop this from being filmed. All this got her was a particularly brave intern coming out from underneath a table... and booting up _another_ camera so they could get close ups. They hadn't done that when it had been just her earlier! "Why don't you and I take this outside? Or... to _our_ bedroom?"

"We don't have a bedroom, you lunatic!" And there went the axe again, crashing down into the floor. Who was going to pay for all of this damage? They hadn't even gotten married yet, they couldn't _possibly_ afford this kind of thing when they still needed to pick out a house and- "And stop messing with the narration! Seriously, holy _cow_! You've been leading everybody reading this on from the start, and nobody's buying any more of it!"

Vert at least had the sense to look affronted at that accusation... but at this point, there was no helping it. Not with Blanc here to call her on anything else she could say to try to defend her story.

She was totally busted.

Her lip starting to tremble, Vert crossed her arms and turned to the side.

"It's not _that_ big of a deal, Blanc. Honestly... So I had some fun with the narration, why is that a problem? It would have gotten both of us a bigger role in the story if you'd just let me finish!" Sighing, clearly disappointed in White Heart foiling her plans, Vert placed a finger to her temple. "I suppose it can't be helped... You just can't see the 'bigger' picture here, can you?"

"Get over yourself!" Stomping her foot, White Heart set her axe down and floated over to Vert so she could look the other CPU in the eye. "We've not lovers! We're not even dating! And we never will be! If you had stuck on _any_ of those 'photos' you were showing up there for more than a few seconds, anybody could have seen you faked them, you friggin' moron! My sisters could've done a better job than that, for crying out loud! Though I guess it's a good thing you have boobs for brains, or this might have ended badly... Seriously, why the _hell_ did you need to pull _this_!?"

Vert swallowed. Tears were starting to spill out of her eyes.

"I... I..."

For a moment, White Heart faltered. For just a moment, with no tampering of the narration on Vert's part, she reconsidered her actions.

"I feel so _left out_... I just wanted to fit in...! So what if I had to be stuck with the equivalent of a cardboard cutout for the rest of my life? At least we'd be fitting in with everyone else, Blanc! That's all I wanted... I just wanted to fit in!"

White Heart immediately regretting giving Vert the benefit of the doubt. Retrieving her axe, the CPU began floating away, shaking her head as she called out the line to instigate a change in scene as she left.

"Oh, shut up and go fit in a coffin! If you can find one that's big enough to fit your chest, that is!"


	7. Anniversary Stage 6

In a dark and lonely corner of a dark and lonely restaurant, two figures sat at a table. Lonely as could be. Some might call them forgotten, but that wasn't the way it had meant to happen. It hadn't meant to be this way! They had been meant for so much more... But things had changed. Gamindustri had changed.

_Justice_ had changed.

For in the darkest and loneliest corner of the darkest and loneliest restaurant, a familiar and once fearsome (... in a manner of speaking, anyway) pair found themselves at a loss. They didn't know what to do with themselves — were they even _allowed_ to do anything with themselves anymore? Who was to say? Would they get a call from their agent(s) if they tried anything funny? Did they have agents now?! If they didn't, how could they get some?!

In unison, Nisa and Gust sighed wistfully, tearing their eyes away from the happy customers around them and returning their gazes to the sorry state they were in. Together, they took a long swig of their (non-alcoholic) drinks and slammed their flasks on the table as one... but even this sight of two pretty girls down in the dumps was not enough to make anyone look their way. Truly, they had hit rock bottom.

"Not paying this time."

Gust was the first of the two girls to speak. It was quickly becoming their routine. They would meet. They would greet. They would mope. They would drink. They would leave. It was all they really could do anymore. After all... After all...!

"It's just not right!" Slamming her fist on the table, causing the glasses on the table to shake as she did, Nisa cried out as she let her frustrations be heard. "We were good characters, weren't we? We were popular, weren't we? Why... Why did this have to happen to us...?! We don't even have a role in the story anymore! Is it because we're flat?! Is it because 5pb. and Cave are bustier?! Is that it...?! There's nothing wrong with us! There isn't!"

Sighing, Gust shook her head to herself as she watched her poor companion vent to no one in particular. The hero had always a habit of talking when no one was listening anyway, so it wasn't like her doing it now was a particularly strange thing to see, but the fact that what she was saying applied to her too was rather troublesome. There were no delusions of heroic grandeur here, no great claims to fame, nothing of the sort. What Nisa went on about now was nothing but a result of the cruel hand that fate had offered them.

Really, some might say that it was a great loss what had happened to the two of them. A Tari-gedy, even. Though Gust dare not speak these fears aloud, she often wondered if, one day, they would just cease to exist, cease to have _ever_ existed. It would be as if everything they had ever said and done would be forgotten, and all of their friends would believe it had been someone else who had said and done those things.

But what kind of catastrophic event could cause such chaos? What sort of evil could do such a thing to such good and kind people like the two of them? Especially Gust?

It was quite simple, actually.

The two of them had been... _retconned_.

Shaking her head, Gust closed her eyes, thinking back to the good old days. Business had been so much better for her before... Now, though? Not so much. She still made a pretty penny off her various online stores, brilliant saleswoman that she was, but it just wasn't the same.

"Was inevitable. Real world events out of our control." Gust nodded sagely, as if the words she had spoken were of such damning importance that there was absolutely nothing she or Nisa could ever hope to do about their cruel fates. She wasn't sure if she was hoping to ease her own troubled heart or Nisa's, but perhaps she could at least reach one of them. "Just gonna have to suck it up. Move on. Pay the piper."

This odd little speech of Gust's, if it could be called a speech, did at least seem to draw Nisa out of her venting... but not to the effect Gust desired. The blue haired hero turned on the smaller girl, confusion and frustration evident.

"'Inevitable'? That's a word that doesn't exist in a hero's dictionary! You should know that too! And why should I pay a piper when I'm already paying your bill tonight?!" Nisa cried out indignantly, pointing at Gust accusingly. It was clear the poor heroine had been through the ringer given how upset she looked at the moment... well, that, or she was suffering from the fabled "getting drunk of off the atmosphere" ailment that appeared in anime so often. Perhaps it was a little of both. "You were supposed to be my sidekick... But then you left me for _her_!"

"Gust was never your sidekick." Gust pointed out nonchalantly, hoping to use that conversation, one they had had time and time again, to divert the issue away from the "her" Nisa had mentioned. They didn't need to start getting into original character territory here, no matter how fitting it might have been for the situation. "Gust think you need some air. Maybe we should..."

"You can't silence justice!" Standing up from her seat, Nisa crossed her arms. Once, her scarf would have started to start fluttering about dramatically, even if there wasn't any wind. Instead, it just... folded over from one side to the other. Dramatically, though! Raising a clenched fist to the sky, Nisa turned to Gust, beginning a speech she had given to the other girl many times. "I'm going to fight back, Gust! Our roles aren't finished yet! Our adventure is only just beginning! Even if we're going to make it an adventure looking for a place to die-" "Gust fine not dying." "-then that will still be our adventure!"

Before Nisa could get any further than that, a familiar voice interrupted her adventure plans.

"Okay, okay, I think that's about _enough_. You shouldn't joke about dying. Now why don't I take you to the back and get you cleaned up?"

As if the room, or at least the pair's dark and lonely corner of doom and gloom, brightened instantly, Nisa deflated as she looked at the speaker while Gust took a sip of her drink. It was none other than the ever busty ninja, MarvelousAQL, who had interrupted Nisa. She was decked out in traditional barmaid attire and looking like quite the catch, but after giving the shinobi a look up and down, Nisa seemed even more troubled.

"How come _she's_ the one who comes to settle me down? Couldn't it have been Lady Blanc? Or... Or Lady _Uni_?" Looking like she was simply pouting now, Nisa cast a disapproving look in MarvelousAQL's direction... or rather, in the direction of her chest. "I was looking forward to getting someone to talk to that wouldn't _abandon me_..." Nisa pointedly looked at Gust as she made this comment, to which the alchemist replied with a shrug. "... but they send... _you_?"

MarvelousAQL tilted her head. Pausing to consider her next words, as she thought them over, she fixed the future narration to recognize her recent change in name to Marvelous!, exclamation point and all, in a manner that wasn't at all added during the creation of this scene because it hadn't been known to those filming it beforehand, and finally decided to place an arm on Nisa's shoulder.

"No one 'sent' me. At least not for you, Nisa. I'm here because I need to meet someone in this bar this evening, and I saw two of my good friends looking like they could use a hand." Offering a cheerful smile, Marvelous! tilted her head towards the back, as if beckoning Nisa to come with her. "I've got some delicious rolls I just made in the back that we can share. They'll definitely make you feel better!"

For a moment, Nisa seemed to be thinking about this as a legitimate option to take. It wasn't like the other options she had right now seemed particularly appealing at the moment, and she didn't mind the sound of fresh food at all. Better than gum that someone had chewed by someone else or rooster blood or monster guts, which was all she ever got these days sticking around demons and their ilk... Letting out a sigh, the heroine of justice lowered her hand to her side and nodded.

"Right... This must be my obligatory 'moment where the hero is faced with a bad situation and has to choose between running away in the face of it or standing up and conquering all the challenges that stand in the way of her delivering justice' episode...! I can't give up here! I'm more than a passing through heroine!" Nisa crossed her arms and nodded to herself, smiling half-heartedly. Her scarf even managed a little more dramatic fluttering this time.

Removing her arm from the smaller girl's shoulder, Marvelous! clapped her hands together and proceeded to loop an arm in one of Nisa's, much to her surprise.

"That's the spirit! Now let's go get some of that futomaki!"

As Nisa began to struggle and to try to escape the ever busty shinobi's grasp, things seemed like they were returning to normal. Sure, she might wind up back here tomorrow with Gust to lament their ever decreasing roles, but for today, she could enjoy herself like she used to without worrying about things like the relevance of her existence and crazy things like that. What kind of hero spent time worrying instead of dishing out justice?

"Look on bright side, Nisa. Better written out than walking, talking plot device like her."

... but then Gust just had to go and open her mouth.

Marvelous! and Nisa both stopped walking, surprised by the sudden words from the small alchemist. Gust, for her part, didn't seem to pay them any mind, as she was now munching on something that she had gotten from who knows where.

"Plot device?" Marvelous! was the first to speak. She was frowning now, her smile having faded and her arm having dropped Nisa's. Gust had definitely been referring to _her_ with that remark, but...

"You know..." Nisa was holding her chin, striking a pose that was not only heroic, but told any onlooker that she was deep in thought. She stepped away from Marvelous! and looked the shinobi up and down, humming thoughtfully as she considered Gust's remark. As the pieces began to fall together, Nisa's eyes widened and she now, once again, was pointing at someone dramatically — but this time, it was Marvelous!. "It's _true_! How did I never notice this before...!?"

"Nisa got brawn, Gust got brains and beauty and more brawn. Not hard." Another helpful comment from the alchemist, who had put aside her snack and turned in her seat to watch the unfolding reactions. They were even starting to catch the attention of some of the other patrons at this point... Should she consider selling tickets?

"W-What are you two talking about?" her arms at her side, the shinobi was feeling significantly less interesting in helping out her friends now that they were talking about her like this. She was not a plot device! "I'm just as much of a developed character as either of you are! Ask anyone!"

"That's not true. Nisa not _nearly_ as developed as you." Once again, Gust was more than happy to supply the most helpful and appropriate commentary for the occasion. At Nisa spinning around to glare at the her accusingly, Gust smirked at the heroine and shrugged her shoulders, as if she were dismissing the unspoken accusation that she was being a bit hypocritical. "Still haven't had growth spurt yet."

Marvelous! puffed her cheeks out in frustration as the hero and alchemist began bickering amongst themselves, as if they had forgotten about her completely now. It was turning into one of those cliche argument scenes, with Nisa getting right in Gust's face and little lightning bolts sparking between them and everything. Now that wasn't fair at all! And it was certainly no way for friends to act!

"Stop it, you two! I want to know what you meant...!" Protesting once more, Marvelous! stepped in-between the two in the hopes that she could settle them down — well, mostly settle Nisa down, really, but she still wanted to pacify the situation and get back to the conversation that it was almost like they were purposely avoiding...

... however, as fate would have it, due to the proximity of the two other girls, when Marvelous! stepped forward, both of them each got a face _full_ of her "character development."

At least that stopped the argument.

"Y-You _monster_!" Her cheeks burning bright red, Nisa flew back almost instantly, pointing accusingly at Marvelous!, who seemed a lot less bothered than one would think she should be given what had just occurred. "Using those... those _things_ as _weapons_ like that! That's so... That's so..."

"Typical of a plot device?" Unlike Nisa, Gust seemed to be taking what had just happened in at least a little more stride, though it appeared as though even she hadn't quite expected that sort of intervention.

"That's it, yeah! That's so typical of a plot device!" Snapping her fingers, Nisa nodded in agreement with Gust's assessment before turning back to Marvelous! with an expression that made it look as though she was forgiving a child that had made a mistake. "It's not your fault that you did that, it's just who you are. It has nothing to do with whether or not you have a heart of justice burning in your ch... I mean, if you have a heart of justice!"

Nodding to herself, as if the matter was now dealt with, Nisa sat down on her seat and reached for her drink as though everything was all hunky dory. Gust looked disappointed now, for she couldn't sell tickets to the cross-appeal event of the... well, the day, at the very least, but she too looked like she had stopped caring.

Well, if that was how they wanted to play it... Fine. Marvelous! still wasn't sure what they had meant, but she could play that game. She was a trained warrior, after all, and sometimes, for the sake of justice, that meant getting her hands dirty!

"I guess it's too much to expect for characters that couldn't even last more than _two_ appearances in the series to be able to explain themselves..." Sighing wistfully, Marvelous! purposefully crossed her arms under her chest — Nisa openly flinched at the "added" size she saw, and even Gust looked a little bothered. "I shouldn't have tried talking to you two... I might end up written out of the games too if I'm not careful... Bye guys..."

Shaking her head, Marvelous! turned to go, dabbing at her eyes to pretend to wipe a tear away. She knew she was being painfully obvious, but it didn't matter how obvious she was being — it would still have the desired effect and all three of them knew it.

"W-Wait a minute! We'll tell you, we'll tell you!" Nisa was once again on her feet, and not a moment later she had grabbed Marvelous!'s wrist and dragged her back to the table. Clearly, perhaps thanks to her origins (Marvelous! couldn't quite remember that girl's name... Usagi...? Asaki...?), the subject of being written out of her rightful role was something of a sensitive subject to Nisa. "We're sorry! Right Gust?"

After giving it a moment of thought, Gust nodded to show her agreement.

"Sorry Nisa is such a doofus. She can explain." It was a backhanded apology, but the two other girls supposed it was the best one could expect out of Gust's type when it was a minor offense like this.

Smiling inwardly, Marvelous! resisted the urge to give Nisa a big hug as the heroine even pulled a chair over for her and "forced" (of course, one couldn't really _force_ her into something she didn't want to do) her into it before returning to her own seat. Now she could get to the bottom of this, then she'd bring her futomaki out for all three of them to share. That would be fun, right?

"So? What did you mean before?" The fact that Marvelous!'s mood had done a 180 from the mood she had been projecting only a moment earlier did not go unnoticed by Gust and Nisa, but now that they weren't kidding around or trying to make themselves feel better about their situation, they realized that this was not exactly the conversation they really wanted to be having. "It sounded pretty rude, but I bet I misunderstood... right?"

There was something in Marvelous!'s voice that made Nisa and Gust feel just a little nervous. It was still peppy and cheerful, but it was lined with something else — something that reminded them that they were dealing with someone who, despite their claims to justice, typically dealt their version of it from the shadows.

And she could even fight while _naked_! Even with all that bouncing! Or so the stories went, anyway. Imagine the mental fortitude she must have!

What had the two of them gotten themselves into...?!

"So, uh... Don't take this the wrong way, but..." Coughing into a gloved hand, Nisa tugged at her scarf awkwardly. She looked to Gust for assistance, but the alchemist was pointedly inspecting a vial that she had pulled out of a pocket or something. "Just, y'know... Look at how you are in the story. Even right now, in this scene, you're just here to move things along. In the story it was for Cave so she could pass along your feelings to Lady Neptune, and now here, you're making me and Gust feel better. Your 'plot devices' even got a role and helped stop our argument too..."

As Nisa trailed off, torn between feeling incredibly ashamed of herself as a heroine and as a human being or glad that she wasn't in Marvelous!'s position, much as she wasn't enjoying the one she herself was in either, the shinobi simply blinked as she processed this information.

That was... true, wasn't it?

She really hadn't noticed it before, but it was true. While it certainly could also be said about other characters, they at least had had roles and purposes outside of pushing things along... She had pushed Cave along, and while that had ultimately led to pushing Neptune along, Cave and 5pb. had still gotten a fair amount of attention on their own, and might even get to have a little more along the way, weren't they?

"Well, I'd better get that futomaki then...!" Her words coming out much less enthusiastic than she had intended, Marvelous! stood up from her seat and began to head for the kitchen. She'd get the food and come back with a smile on her face, just like she had had when she arrived. Keeping emotions in check was another skill that shinobi were supposed to be masters of, after all! And it wasn't like she should feel disappointed about something like this, should she? It wasn't like she hadn't been doing other things during all of that time... It just hadn't been seen.

Maybe this was how Nisa and Gust felt about being written out?

Shaking her head — she couldn't let it get her down! — the busty shinobi started towards the kitchen. Nisa looked from Gust, who looked genuinely conflicted for once, and Marvelous!, who seemed to be "okay" despite how she obviously was not, before finally deciding to stand up.

What kind of hero would let a damsel in distress go off alone?!

As that bit of narration went by, as if struck by lightning, Gust stood up in her seat. It didn't clatter to the floor, as she was so tiny that she was literally standing on her seat, but it did catch the attention of Nisa and the retreating Marvelous!.

"Gust... Gust has the answer!" Pointing towards Marvelous! in a fashion more dramatic than most were used to from the little alchemist ("That's my sidekick!"), Gust made her brilliant plan known. "You. Start the Nisa route. Trigger some flags here and there and you'll _have_ to be more than plot device. It'll be easy."

Nisa and Marvelous! could only stare at the alchemist. Was she... _seriously_... suggesting that... the two of _them_...?!

"Where did that come from!? We've never even talked, at least not as far as I remember!" Nisa was the first to take action, being the ever boisterous heroine that she was. The fact that Gust was suggesting she be paired with such a... such a... such a_ balloon animal_ was... It was a betrayal! Not that Nisa would ever allow herself to be paired with anyone _other_ than justice, mind, but that was still totally out of line! "That wouldn't make sense! Who would want to read a story that doesn't make sense? I've never even heard of a story like that!"

"R-Right!" Marvelous!'s response was less than a little enthusiastic. Her enthusiasm was continuing to drop the more this conversation went on, in fact. Truth be told, she actually had no problems with Nisa's company one way or the other, and while she wasn't sure about being paired with her (or anyone — or _not_ being paired with her or anyone, for that matter!), her mind was still too stuck on the hero's earlier comments to be as invested in this conversation as the blue haired vigilante was.

Gust seemed nonplussed.

"So? There things in _this_ story that don't make sense. IF, Lady Blanc, the fact Nisa and Gust even are still around after retcon... Gust could go on."

Nisa could only gape at Gust as the little alchemist tilted her head innocently. What kind of villainous accusation was Gust throwing out now? Worse, was she trying to get herself _killed_...?! It was one thing to complain about their role, but to complain about... _that_?

Just as Nisa was about to warn Gust that she was treading on dangerously thin ice, once again, the growing group of secondary characters was interrupted by the voice of a newcomer.

"That's where you're wrong, Gust."

"Speak of the Overlord..." Nisa commented under her breath, though inwardly, she was actually very, _very_ relieved that her trusty sidekick and sort-of friend wouldn't be facing divine punishment any time soon.

For it was none other than IF herself who had arrived on the scene.

"If it's me you want to talk about, then you must mean how I'm still from Leanbox in the story, right?" Placing a hand on her hip, IF stepped up to stand between the table that Nisa and Gust were seated at and the one where Marvelous! was. "There's a perfectly reasonable explanation for that if you think about it. It applies all of that stuff — everything you didn't mention too."

"Gust doesn't follow." Despite her blunt words, for the first time since the scene had started, the alchemist finally actually seemed genuinely interested in what someone else among them was saying. She had turned to face IF and was clearly waiting for her to explain.

IF sighed. Well, she supposed if someone had to do it...

"It's simple. It's not like we ever specified that we were going to follow one 'canon' by the book, right?" Crossing her arms, IF surveyed the three young women before her, waiting for them to catch on. Marvelous! seemed to be the first, followed by Gust... Unfortunately, given how something like "canon" meant significantly less to Nisa, it was understandable it took her just a moment more to get her gears going. "Everything like that, like my being from Leanbox, was covered by an explanation in the story, wasn't it? It's not like we just decided to pick some random character and introduce such an important element to them for no reason, right?"

"That's true..." Nisa, finally having caught on fully, nodded thoughtfully as she considered IF's words. It was true! They hadn't just up and said IF worshiped Lady Vert for no reason, she had gotten a whole backstory to both include that while still being able to be Compa's childhood friend, like she was supposed to be. How... _heroic_! "But what about how Lady Blanc's feelings for Neptune? Or some of the other stuff?"

IF rubbed her temples. Really, Nisa...? Oh well. Considering what she was a walking parody of and what she was born from, maybe she needed certain things spelled out to make sense, in a way the main story just wouldn't be able to cover.

"Still simple. With Lady Blanc, it's a combination of a few things. The easiest one is that, because this _is_ a story outside of the games, there's some artist liberty being taken, because this story's main 'canon' is the story itsel...f..." IF wondered briefly if it was okay for her to start explaining everything like this. _Technically_ even _she_ wasn't supposed to know all of this under normal circumstances, but since she had stepped this far out of the wall's reach, she might as well finish... It wasn't like it would matter once the scene ended anyway. "It's also meant to be referencing some 'real world' relationships between the 'real' Lowee and Planeptune. Plus, since the other Lady Blanc seems to feel something towards that Lady Plutia character, since she's not really all that different from _our_ Lady Blanc, maybe _our_ Lady Blanc actually has feelings for Nep too. You could even infer it a little from the remake... Or so I hear, anyway..."

IF wasn't done just yet, though.

"However! Since Nep and Lady Plutia are. well... Well they're _clearly_ different people, our Lady Blanc might show her feelings differently, or just not be as aware of them, since..."

IF paused. Her audience was on the edge of their seats, but... She didn't really want to say anything that could "risk" the wrath of a certain Iris Heart.

"... s-since the people they're interested in are different!" Deciding on the safest answer she could think of, IF nodded to herself, shooting a quick glance around the room to make sure she hadn't spoken about anyone who had been secretly hiding in wait. No Blancs, no Neps, no Plutias... Whew. "Anyway, as for that last part? Like I've said, we're drawing from a few sources. Mostly the games, but, and it'll be a _little_ more obvious in Part 3, there are a couple of things the anime did for characterization and relationships between characters that were used as inspiration for some things in the story, though from what I remember, that's mostly Lady Vert and Nepg... Er... What are you all looking at?"

For some reason, that last thing she had said seemed to have caught them far more off guard than IF had expected it to.

"We... We have an _anime_?!"

"Gust demands royalties."

Oh. Right, since none of them had been able to be in it, no wonder that they didn't know about it...

"A-Anyway, the point is, everything in the story either has basis somewhere, or it's being built up through the story itself!" Hoping she could distract the two starstruck girls at the table on one side, IF cast a look towards the bustier girl at the table on the other. While she had certainly been enthralled by IF's explanations while they had been coming, now that they were over, she was starting to look down again. "More importantly, I want to talk to..."

"That was _soooooo_ informative, Wifey Number One! You should be the one writing this story — no! You should write _our_ story!"

Before IF could speak any more, she found herself getting tackled from behind as some sort of small and... overly affectionate creature latched onto her from behind. IF didn't even have guess to know who had arrived based on these things — she knew full well who the culprit was.

"R-RED?! What are you doing here...?! How long have you..." Doing her best to not fall over as the creature, otherwise known as RED, gave IF a just-for-Iffy greeting, IF finally managed to get the redheaded girl off of her without too much damage. "Listen, RED, I've told you, I'm not..."

The girl seemed to not be bothered at all by IF's protesting — in fact, she was already walking past the brunette, much to her surprise. Maybe... she _was_ finally getting the hint? IF was glad she hadn't had to hurt the girl's feelings to get it through to her that she had a girlfriend, but... Maybe she had figured it out during that scene earlier when she and Compa had been dancing?

"That's fine, I'm not here for you today, Iffy...! We'll always have Las Retcas." Smiling cheerfully despite the confused look on IF's face ("So much for getting thie hint..."), RED turned on the other girls of the group, giving them all appreciative looks before her sparkling eyes finally settled on the blue haired heroine. Her heart beating away in her chest, RED clasped her hands together and took a step closer towards the washboard wonder. "Today, I'm here for my _role mate_."

For a moment, the other girls could only stare blankly at the redhead... except for Nisa, who was muttering something under her breath that sounded strangely like she was reliving a horrible past memory ("T-That expression... That body language... This... This is just like that time that succubus thought I was a boy...! N-No, Lord Laharl, please don't send me out there...! _Heroes aren't supposed to be involved in things rated that high...!_").

"Excuse me, RED?" It was Marvelous! who spoke up, for the first time in quite some time at that, to address the odd choice of words that RED had used. "Don't you mean 'soul' mate? I've never heard of anything like a 'role' mate before."

"Nope, I definitely meant what I said, Marvy," RED's smile was a mile wide as she gave Marvelous! a wink before turning back to Nisa, slowly shifting back to the "blushing bride" version of her usual cheery self. Now what had gotten into her...? "In the second game's remake, I was the one who took over for her when she couldn't be there because she had to _heroically_ go fight monsters and _protect_ us _all_ from _evil_, right?"

"Right!" IF fought the urge to smack her forehead as she watched Nisa perk right up at RED's usage of "the magic words." She had just been reliving some kind of horrible and traumatic memory, now she was like a puppy wagging her tail and eating right out of RED's hand!

"Well, since we both have the same role in the same story now..." RED took another step towards Nisa, holding out her hand with only her pointer finger and thumb extended as she was often prone to do. "... that makes us _role mates_! See?"

"Oh... Okay..." Slowly sitting up, Nisa straightened her scarf. That... didn't sound so bad. It was kind of like having a sidekick, wasn't it? Or... Or maybe some kind of fusion...? That could be pretty cool, now that she thought about it... She just needed to get a motorcycle and find a hat and a guy that could turn _into_ a motorcycle and this could be the start of her heroic comeback! "I _think_ that makes sense... Yeah, I guess we _are_ 'role mates'!"

IF wanted very badly to shake her head and make "no! no! no!" motions with her hands now that RED couldn't see her, but... RED was her friend too, after all. Plus, if it meant RED would get off of _her_ back a little more (literally and figuratively), then why not? Besides, Nisa _had_ wanted an in back into the story, and knowing RED...

"I'm glad you understand! Because, in other words, it's like we've _mated_ through our _roles_, so that makes us even _closer_ than wifeys _and_ soul mates _combined_! All we need to do now is the physical part to seal the deal!"

... something like _that_ was coming.

"Wait wha-"

"Come to momma!"

"Wait, not until Gust gets out her camera..."

"Oh, that's a great idea! We should have pictures of our honeymoon! Let's pose!"

"W-W-W-What!? I don't want my honeymoon to be in a- Wait, who said I had even agreed to this?! Heroes can't have relationships! Y-You'll probably die, you know! The girl one always dies!"

"Then I'll just have to protect you! Don't worry, role mate, our bond is so special that it reaches across gaming platforms! I'd never let you die!"

"Nisa better stay _extra_ close so _she_ doesn't die. Just in case. No, no, little closer."

"Hold on a second, I don't count for that! And Gust, why are you agreeing with her...?!"

As RED tried to to start her honeymoon with the flailing heroine then and there (IF wanted to hope against hope that RED didn't know what _really_ happened on a honeymoon, but considering the adult games that she somehow managed to keep getting a hold of, she couldn't be sure... though she could at least be sure she needed to give Vert and/or Chika a stern talking to about it later), IF rolled her eyes, glad for the distraction, for now she could finally approach, Marvelous!, who had gone from entering the scene and brightening it with her mere presence to sitting on the sidelines and looking... Well, about as far from that as the poor girl could.

"Anyway... Are you still thinking about what they were saying before?" The shinobi didn't need to reply for IF to know she was right on the money. It had been why she had come over in the first place, after all. "Hey, don't sweat things like this. If you think about it, this scene wasn't just to 'mourn' the 'loss' of those two at all. It was to give you and even RED over there a little time to shine too. Maybe it was also a... sort of apology?"

"Apology?" Marvelous! frowned. What did that mean? "What is there to apologize for?"

IF offered the shinobi a sheepish smile in response, casting a quick glance in the direction of the rambunctious group she had left to make sure she didn't need to interfere or cue a fade to black ("Whew! All clear. Guess she doesn't know after all... At least I hope not...") before returning her gaze to Marvelous!.

"For not being able to include you more... Or her, I guess." IF supposed it made sense that RED had appeared now of all times too — she really, for the most part, only had been in the same single scene Marvelous! had been in, occasional references by other characters aside.

"You think so?" Marvelous!'s frown softened. In a way, she felt bad — she didn't need to be apologized to! She was thrilled that her words had helped things between Cave and 5pb.! She just would have liked to... Actually, she wasn't really sure _what_ she would have liked, now that she thought about it. RED clearly didn't mind, from the looks of things, and even Nisa and Gust seemed to be enjoying themselves now... in a manner of speaking. "Even though I'm just..."

IF held up a finger to silence the orange haired girl before her. She may not have been a trained... whatever Marvelous! was, but she did have a little more experience in these matters, if nothing else.

"So what if you're a plot device? I was totally one when I came in there to explain things earlier, wasn't I? Shoot, I was barely that, I was just here for exposition — you could have had a text box do the same thing!" Laughing dryly to herself, IF shook her head, sharing with the shinobi an understanding look. "But... Is that so bad?"

Offering Marvelous! a grin, IF jabbed her thumb behind her — to Marvelous!'s surprise, she realized that IF and RED hadn't been the only fellow members of the cast that had been eating here. There was Falcom, the other Falcom, Broccoli, Tekken, and so many more people...!

"Outside of the wedding scene that had _everybody_ in it, look at all the people who haven't even been mentioned in the story up until now. With such a huge cast, it's crazy to think we'd all get a shot at screen time. Even if you just got to show up to be a plot device for a little while, it was still _you_ who got chosen. _You_ were the one person who could do what needed to be done. Don't forget that."

Feeling considerably better about things now, Marvelous! nodded at IF's words and hopped off of the seat she had plunked herself down on. Before IF could stop her, the shinobi gave the Guild member a big hug, one not unlike the one she _would_ have given Nisa before things had gotten... Well, like they had. Though taken aback by the action, Marvelous! clearly meant no harm by it, so IF returned the hug and then stepped away, rubbing the back of her head sheepishly. She wasn't as bad as Noire and Uni, but she definitely wasn't exactly the touchy feely type either...

It was at this point, now that things on their side had passed over, that the two noticed that things at the table they had stepped away from had grown oddly... quiet. Slowly turning their heads, in unison, both IF and Marvelous! found themselves going pale.

RED was looking straight at the two of them, but rather than looking jealous as one might expect from the lover of all things wifey, her eyes were _sparkling_, and... was that... _blood_ coming out of her nose...?! What in the world was going on in her mind...?!

Nisa, on the other hand, was still in RED's iron wifey-loving grip, and it appeared as though even the great heroine of justice couldn't escape from the power of love. Unfortunately for her, RED had been in the process of smothering her with her "love" in the hopes of convincing Nisa that they truly were "one" and "meant to be" and that they should "go make it official" when she had caught sight of... well, whatever it was that she _thought_ IF and Marvelous! were doing, leaving poor Nisa trapped in the legendary marshmallow hell.

And last but not least, Gust had been happily taking pictures of it all, knowing at least one of them would look great on a poster and would no doubt make her big bucks down the line. She was back in business!

"W...ell, Marvy, I'll leave this to you."

"H-Huh? But I don't-"

"Don't forget, you're supposed to be working here, remember? Bye!"

"Marvy... That was _awesome_! I know! Let's have a double wedding! I'll marry Nisa, then I'll marry you and Iffy!"

"Pwah! _Finally_! I can breathe agai... Wait, wedding?! I didn't hear about this!"

"You have now, wifey! What size dress would you like?"

"D... Don't question me!"

"Awww, look at you with those obscure references! C'mere!"

"Nooooo! Stooooop! I'm too young!"

As IF stepped out of the building, thoroughly pleased with herself for getting out of there before whatever she was hearing had gotten started, she caught sight of a familiar face across the way and waved to them. Seeing the bright reaction she got in response, IF found herself warming up inside as she crossed the street to meet them, already having forgotten the chaos she was leaving behind her.

Because while IF didn't mind being a secondary character or a plot device or even having to deal with the confusion of having backgrounds from different games mixed together to make a new one, as she was now, even if the her of another world or another life might have been perfectly happy with this person or that person, she definitely would have had a few things to say if she couldn't be with Compa.


	8. Anniversary Stage 7

"Oh sister... Why did it have to come to this...?" Sighing dramatically, though truthfully there were few other ways Chika _could_ sigh, the Oracle of Leanbox leaned over the table before taking a desperate swig of her drink. It did little to make her feel better now, but she supposed if she couldn't have Vert in reality, she could drink herself into unconsciousness and see her sister in her dreams. "I'm coming for you! Wait for me...!"

The three other Oracles seated around the table watched Chika with a mixture of emotions. Kei and Histoire could at least relate to the prospect Chika was facing on a level due to the marriages of their own CPUs, even if not the "also having feelings for that CPU" part of the equation, and in their own ways, felt for green haired woman. Mina, who was technically in a similar situation, _would_ have perhaps been feeling sympathetic to Chika in a different sort of way, but as she had yet to be told of what Vert and Blanc had been discussing, even after all of this time, she remained blissfully ignorant, even in this setting free of the restraints of the fourth wall.

"I don't see why you have to make such a big deal out of whatever is going on with her..." Mina shrugged her shoulders dismissively, pushing up her glasses as she reached for her own drink. Naturally, it wasn't nearly the sort of _vulgar_ and _adult_ drink that Chika was drinking. "Lady Vert is available and no one would _ever_ judge you for making advances. It must be _so_ nice, being able to be so open about what you like..."

Chika narrowed her eyes as Mina spoke. Kei looked to Histoire in the hopes that looking at the other Oracle's reaction might clue her in as to what exactly Mina was referring to, but Histoire's reaction — a sigh and a raised hand to her head — didn't help her figure much of anything out. She supposed more observation was in order.

This sort of conversation had occurred before, Kei realized, or at least Mina had made comments like that before... On the other hand, Chika had never been in the state she was in when they had taken place. Was that important?

"Here we go again... Why does it always take me three drinks to remember why I don't like these get togethers...?"

"You... You think you can talk about not being able to do this or that, but you have no idea what you're talking about!" Standing up in her seat, Chika slammed her drink down onto the table with such force that liquid actually flew up from the sides of the glass. "You're just a _lolicon_! It's not enough that my poor sister is blind to what's right next to her because of this, but... But even a fellow Oracle is shamelessly..."

Chika never did finish explaining what she felt that Mina was doing so shamelessly. Her face began to turn a color not unlike that of her hair, and she quickly bolted — probably heading for the restroom.

"That's what she gets for getting up like that." Mina commented to herself, smirking ever so slightly as she watched the Leanbox Oracle go. It was clear that even she, with all her posturing, was starting to get affected by the "poison." "She can be no better than the twins sometimes. Maybe _she_ needs a babysitter herself..."

"Now now, Mina, there's no need for comments like that..." Histoire had stepped in to Chika's defense, being aware of what was going on with the other Oracle. The blue haired woman looked at her curiously for a moment, then shrugged it off and returned to her drink.

With Chika gone for the moment, it appeared as though things would be calm for a little while... Which left Kei to her thoughts. Pursing her lips as she surveyed the table once more and took a sip of her own drink, Lastation's Oracle considered her own situation. Given her greater role in the upcoming Part 3 of the story, and the exact _specifics_ of that role... Or rather, given how she had left things in Part 2... Perhaps now would be a good time to consider her options?

If she was going to look for love, or at least look to understand the _experience_ of love, then obviously she would need another person to help her with that. She couldn't very well do it on her own — it was that sort of attitude that had gotten her to this point in the first place, after all. The most obvious choices would be fellow Oracles like herself, but...

The most obvious of those obvious choices was Mina. No overt or interfering attachment to anyone else like Chika had, not to mention no obvious issues of size differences like Histoire would create. Really, Histoire wasn't even "obvious" like the other two were because of tha,t unfortunately. While Mina might have... whatever it was that she harbored towards her CPU Candidates, Kei didn't know her to be the kind of person who would do anything particularly offensive with that, and if she were to be realistic about it, considering her own appearance, Mina's tastes would work to her own advantage, wouldn't they?

On the other hand... Kei wasn't sure if she was ready to experiment with a person who so readily became inspired and excited by the idea of cleaning her charges with her tongue, even for a scene meant purely as comedy relief.

Actually, she didn't think she would _ever_ be ready for that.

Okay. Definitely not Mina, then.

The next choice would then have to be Chika, but...

Kei bit her lip and glanced in the direction that the green haired Oracle had dashed off in.

The woman had either been drinking enough to make herself sick over her existing feelings for someone else, or she felt so strongly about it all that she was being dramatic about it to make herself feel better. Knowing Chika, Kei suspected it was likely a mixture of both — she probably just wanted the attention. There was also the fact that, given Chika's almost "vigilante" behavior recently, Kei wasn't sure how she should feel about the woman, especially considering how it might effect Planeptune and Lastation... She couldn't say.

On the other hand... Kei had to stop herself from dismissing Chika outright for a moment. While Chika was certainly a wild card, it was clear that she was only so because of her ability to feel affection for another person. Thinking on it a little more, Kei supposed it wouldn't be a stretch at all to believe that Chika probably understood "love," at least the romantic kind that Kei sought to understand herself, better than anyone else in their group.

... However, returning to her initial concerns... Kei didn't particularly like the idea of the drama that Chika would bring with her, even without taking into account current affairs between the nations. That was just the kind of person Chika was. Kei had finally started to deal with her own personal drama and she would be quite happy not having to deal with any more for as long a while as possible. If that meant forgoing the most "experienced" member of the group, then...

In other words?

Definitely not Chika either.

Kei sighed, finishing her drink and setting the glass on the table.

She normally would have only considered Mina and Chika to be the obvious options out of this obvious bunch, but... She supposed she could think outside of the box if she had to. Hesitantly, she turned to look towards the last remaining member of their group. She supposed it was the inside that counted, right? Even if the person in question still had significantly less actual _insides_ than she did — less everything, really.

Well... Here goes nothing.

"Say, Histoire? I have a request."

"Kei? What is it?" The smaller Oracle seemed surprised by Kei speaking up, but her reaction was hardly negative. She was smiling warmly at her and despite her flushed cheeks, for even Histoire had had a few drinks by this point, she seemed perfectly calm and capable right now. Chances were, if Kei had to guess, she was happy to have a distraction from Mina and Chika. Well, that certainly worked in Kei's favor, didn't it? Distraction was just what she was looking for.

Though how was she to go about suggesting it...

As an idea began to form, Kei scooted her chair just a little closer towards where Histoire's book was floating. The Oracle either paid it no mind or assumed Kei was simply getting closer to make the conversation she was about to instigate easier on the two of them, as it _was_ a bit noisy. According to the books Kei had been reading on the subject, not to mention the things she had caught Noire watching that she had been sworn to never speak of for as long as she lived, physical proximity was a good way to approach this sort of thing.

"I've been thinking about Lastation and Planeptune, Histoire." Her tone as formal as ever, Kei's voice and words gave no hint as to the topic that she was approaching. She glanced around the room before returning her gaze to Histoire. Now that it was time for her to act...

... she didn't actually feel bothered. Was that a bad sign? She had read that when approaching a potential romantic partner on the subject, one would get nervous and feel _something_, but she wasn't feeling much of anything yet. Had she done something wrong? She hadn't had much to drink, so she knew that wasn't involved...

"Kei? Is something the matter?" Histoire's expression had shifted to a frown now. It was understandable — Kei's feelings regarding the union of the two nations were hardly a secret, even if her recent attempts to change her heart on the matter were. Perhaps Histoire thought that Kei was about to start some sort of disagreement, or maybe she thought Kei was going to complain about Planeptune...

That would make for a good opening, wouldn't it?

Deciding that she could deal with whether or not she felt anything after Histoire answered her, Kei offered Histoire what she hoped was an appealing smile. It wasn't exactly a skill she had ever needed to use in these circumstances before, though she certainly knew how to appear appealing when it came to business. Would that apply here as well?

"I think we need to go further." Kei started, hoping she would be able to ease Histoire into this without much trouble. Already, the Oracle appeared to be calming down now that it appeared to her that Kei wasn't going to start something — of course, that had never been Kei's intent here anyway. "Lady Neptune and Noire have presented an excellent plan for the unification of our nations, but I believe we can do more. As their Oracles, it is our duty to do this."

Histoire blinked in surprise. This was certainly surprising! For Kei to be talking like this... It must be quite the idea that she had! Happy that her fellow Oracle was more willing to go along with the nations' union, Histoire herself floated closer to Kei, a smile spreading across her lips.

"That sounds wonderful, Kei. Just what is it that you have in mind?" Oblivious to what Kei was planning for her, Histoire appeared for the world like her night had just been made.

Were Kei truly invested in this, the following narration might have been: Little did Histoire know that Kei had much more in store for the other Oracle than business, and Kei intended to make sure she enjoyed it just as much as she would. Were Kei Neptune after a long day of work and the drinks Kei had had, the following narration instead might have been: Little did Histoire know that Kei would making her night _all night long_.

Being neither of those things, Kei simply chose to get right down to business.

"After studying how our shares have mutually increased since the wedding, I believe it would be very beneficial for the two of us to enter a relationship as well." Kei made sure to lock eyes with Histoire as she delivered her suggestion, though without changing the tone of her voice, one might have _almost_ believed she really _was_ suggesting some kind of trade. Realizing that this might be a fatal error, Kei gently, almost clumsily even, raised her hand to place it on Histoire's tiny lap. It was something that felt awkward even to her, and she regretted the action almost immediately — but what was done was done.

If Histoire had been confused about what Kei had been alluding to before, there was absolutely no way that she could possibly be getting mixed messages now.

Her face growing bright red in a matter of seconds, Histoire's book rose in place and already started a retreat — before she had even given Kei an answer no less!

"I-I-I'll... I'll let you know!"

As the little flustered fairy floated off, making a strange "ababa" sound as she went (no... Kei had probably imagined it... right?), Kei sighed once more and placed her elbow on the table so she could rest her face in her palm. She'd have been through three relationships by the time Histoire ever got back to her. _If_ Histoire ever got back to her.

She supposed... She'd have to look elsewhere then. Maybe that was for the best. Chika had clearly never even considered her fellow Oracles, and Mina... Well, Kei honestly didn't know what Mina _seriously_ considered in a relationship. Maybe that was for the best as well. Maybe Mina herself didn't even know. If that was the case... Maybe Mina was the one to ask after all?

Kei wasn't sure if she was particularly interested in trying again so soon, however, and certainly not with Mina right now given the state she was in. At the very least, she was starting to understand why even those who actually did desire relationships found them so difficult. Rejection was... irritating.

Raising her head, Kei decided she might as well get another drink. After that humiliating disaster, she certainly felt like she could use one. Maybe she'd go make sure Chika hadn't hurt herself before she tried to converse with Mina about her situation. Maybe Mina would even be understanding about it...

Unfortunately, before Kei was able to excuse herself and head to the bar or even to the restroom to see how Chika was doing (or if she was even there), her gaze met the gaze of Mina... and Kei quickly realized that she was probably going to need more than one drink. The woman had a strange look on her face, one that made it clear she had been watching the horrible exchange that had just taken place betweem herself and Histoire, but it wasn't one of offense. Oh no.

It was a strange sort of smile. Kei might have called it lecherous if she were the kind of person who used such descriptions to address her colleagues, but she would never apply such a word to a fellow Oracle... still, she really didn't like the way Mina was smiling at all. How closely had she been watching that exchange with Histoire...? And more importantly, how much had Mina had to drink?

Kei didn't like where this was going.

And Kei definitely didn't like the fact that there was understanding in that smile.

"So... You think Histoire is pretty too...? I always _knew_ I couldn't be the only one..."

Kei didn't like any of this one bit.


	9. Anniversary Stage 8

"Look at this, Noire! Look how long it's been since I've been in a scene! We're being taken over... no, we're being _overrun_ by side characters! It's not enough that they're invading the main story like super powered locust people, this might be the only anniversary chapter we ever get, and _we're not even in it anymore_!"

Like a little bouncing monkey being denied her banana, Neptune was fastforwarding through the different scenes that had taken place in the special anniversary special thus far. To her outrage (well, perhaps that was a bit extreme), she was barely _in_ any of them! It had been one thing to give her besties some screentime, but now there were people who had barely had lines — if they'd even had any at all! — jumping in to have scenes all their own! What the heck was going on here?! Just who did they think they were?!

"Neptune, this is only the eighth or ninth scene so far and we've already been in three before this. What happened to you wanting everyone else to get their turn?" Noire sighed as she leaned back on the couch she was reclining on, shooting a glance up at the screen. Right now, Nisa and Gust were doing something it looked like — nothing that particularly interested Noire at the moment, so instead she lowered her gaze to the handheld device in her hands. Uni had let her borrow this so she could play the new remake of the first game that had come out recently, and she wanted to get as much out of it as she could.

"That... That was completely different!" Neptune sounded indignant, but she knew that she'd been caught. She _did_ feel that way, but darn it, couldn't they at least focus on Iffy and Compa more if they were going to do something like that? Neptune would be all for her bestest pals in the whole wide world (except that time they were her and Plutia's children, then they were her bestest pals-slash-kids, she guessed?) getting more screen time through something like this! "Besides, that scene wasn't connected to this one, so... Well, anyway, they're totally different!"

Neptune was glad she had caught herself in time to stop, shooting a glance to the other side of the room. She couldn't really try the "the scenes are all unconnected" defense when she had started the scene off complaining about other ones.

"Doesn't seem too different to me." Thankfully, Noire didn't seem invested enough in the conversation to take issue with Neptune's stumble. She was probably trying to raise her and Neptune's Lily Rank or something... What happened to not playing the game when it was just stuff they could do together in real life, huh?

Neptune couldn't help but pout at the thought — it was one thing for them to play games, games were _kind of_ their lives after all, it was why they had huge, relationship-threatening fights over them, but if Noire was going to put time into grinding Lily Ranks, then she should grind _her_ 'Lily Rank' instead!

Pausing the video, Neptune sauntered over to the couch to assume a seat next to Noire and peek over at how she was doing. Maybe it was just a _really_ good remake...

Wait a minute... She... _She wasn't even playing as either one of them!_ What was up with that?

"What? I'm trying to play here." Noire had finally noticed Neptune was watching her and was looking back at her with a rather frustrated look. There was something strange about it though... Maybe she was trying to get something in the game that she didn't want Neptune to see?

Well whatever it was, Neptune didn't care!

"Aw, come on, don't act like you don't want more time for us to hang out without any restrictions. We could make a slice of life spinoff of the story or something just for goofing off! We can call it 'The Proposal? Nepoffu'!" Neptune grinned at the outdated reference she had just made, looking to Noire for approval of her idea. "Whaddya say? It'd give everybody who looked at it cavities."

Noire simply responded with a shrug.

Now Neptune was _sure_ something was going on here.

"Hmmm... I know it can't just be that game that's got you so disinterested here..." Neptune frowned as she watched her wife play away at the game in her hands, before a thought struck her and she snapped her fingers. "I've got it! You're worried you look like a huge pervert after how most of our last scenes here ended up with you jumping me, so you're trying to act 'cool' and 'indifferent' and restore your honor! Not too shabby, Noire. It would have worked if you had been in a scene with someone who didn't know you so well."

Noire nearly dropped the device in surprise, but she caught herself in time before she let it tumble to the floor. The damage, however, had been done.

"I-I did _not_ jump you!" Red eyes were looking straight at Neptune, and her cheeks were well on their way to starting to match. Neptune couldn't help but grin at the sight — she had Noire's attention again! She was worried she would have had to start being _annoying_ to do it. "Honestly... Is it so wrong that we just act normally here?"

"You were acting more normal in those scenes. Besides, you can still be yourself without closing up on me like an angry clam." Deciding that she had teased Noire enough about it (and that she would much rather have her wife back to normal _before_ the scene ended, thank you very much), Neptune scooted over on the couch and pointedly made no attempt to do anything more than lean against Noire. "We're probably going to be really busy in Part 3, is it that wrong for us to get some time like this now where we can hang out and play like we did in Part 1? We weren't making kissy faces and googly eyes all the time back then, but... I kinda miss that sort of thing. It still happens, but it's happening off screen most of the time now."

The black haired CPU wanted to point out that the reason they didn't spend time together like that as much anymore was that no one would probably appreciate stopping the story to show them on days off or cut off from times when things were happening to show things like that now, but... She couldn't.

Neptune's accusation had been right on the money.

She wanted that too.

She wouldn't mind at all if their watching TV or playing games together or even the simple cuddling could get some more time... Even if it _would_ probably make for a less action packed (if it could be called action) story than one filled with all the developments and things that Part 2 had been... Would it be so bad? Pursing her lips, Noire set the game down and returned it to her inventory.

Neptune had won this round, and the agreement she felt showed on her face as plain as day.

"And _that's_ why I think we need more scenes together!" Neptune grinned triumphantly as she watched Noire, just for a moment, almost want to try to find a way to deny Neptune's point, but it looked as though the CPU simply didn't have it in her right then.

"I don't know... You two have the entire story to have scenes together."

"Yeah, we should be the ones complaining here! Yours have been really long anyway!"

Neptune and Noire both looked up in surprise, clearly not expecting to be interrupted. Much to their... words that are not appropriate for this story, the two speakers who had interrupted them were none other than Vert and Blanc. Blanc pointedly had chosen to sit down next to Neptune, but not before shooting a glare in Vert's direction (or was it Noire's?), while Vert had seated herself next to Noire.

In almost an instant, the pleasant mood that had been building up shattered, in its place leaving something... else.

The married couple exchanged a look, beads of sweat running down the back of their necks.

This was awkward.

"What are you two complaining about?" Noire was the first to speak up, and as awkward as the situation was, what was more evident about her was her typical indignation as Team CPU's resident tsundere. Neptune would have given her a thumbs up in that moment, but it probably wouldn't have helped their cases any — especially since she didn't even know what their case was yet. "Your names aren't even in the story summary, but look at all the screentime you've been getting in it! Neptune may have been whining about minor characters being in _this_, but you two have been jumping into chapter after chapter without any shame at all."

Vert seemed genuinely taken aback by this, while Blanc sported a low-grade scowl in response.

"So? If you were a writer, or had an _ounce_ of imagination, you'd know that most stories evolve over time and change and grow as they progress, like, oh I don't know, _this one_ has. I guess when all you can think about is working or humping your wife like a bitch in heat, creativity isn't really..." Blanc had started off feeling particularly proud of herself for finally being able to chew Noire out for something, but the looks the other CPUs, even freaking _Vert_, were giving her got her to stop herself.

Looking down at her lap, Lowee's CPU tugged her hat down and glared at the floor, muttering a quick apology under her breath.

Noire looked ready to explode. After all, she had _already_ been concerned about how she had been appearing when it came to the affection she had been showing in the chapter thus far, and showing how she felt had always been something of a sore subject for her as it was, and here Blanc had just gone and thrown it in her face in the most derogatory way possible! Luckily, Neptune, who would have rather liked to not have to worry an action scene breaking out, was still there next to her to try to diffuse the situation.

Vert, meanwhile, felt rather conflicted about the whole thing. Part of her was still surprised by Noire's earlier comment, but then Blanc had gone and said what she had, and Vert... wasn't sure how to react to it. After all, she was rather unattached from that whole situation, Leanbox's situation aside, wasn't she? Still... She did like to believe that, on some level, all three of these girls were her friends... _on some level_, but here they were, emotions all tangled together and getting in the way of how they used to be able to get together here, even with their nations competing as they were, and play games and do other silly things.

In a way, she felt like an observer. Despite her obvious connections to Lowee right now, there simply wasn't reason for her to get worked up about this the way the three of them were. Neptune had the honor of her wife to defend, Noire had been verbally jabbed at by Blanc for being with her wife, and Blanc was sitting right next to someone who she had been dealing with her unrequited feelings for for the majority of the story.

Vert... didn't really have anything like that here. Obligations to a relationship with Lowee that was looking shaky at best right now, but was that all?

She wondered when this scene was supposed to be taking place. Set outside of the story, it probably wasn't taking the big ending of Part 2 into account, which meant Nepgear likely wouldn't be making any appearances. Her relationships with others hadn't been established enough to fit her in, more than likely... So did that mean she was sleeping right now? Didthat mean... Could Vert still go visit her...? With everything going on, much as she had wanted to, she really hadn't had the chance...

"Look! Stop everything! Vert's taking up the narration! Stop her before it's too late and _she_ gets the scene!" Neptune's voice brought Vert out of her thoughts. The blonde blinked a few times as she looked to the other three CPUs, all of whom were looking at her in a rather accusatory way, but Blanc in particular had daggers in her eyes meant just for Vert.

"N-Now now, everyone, let's not get too concerned about the minor details like that..." Vert gently raised her hands and offered the other CPUs a smile, hoping she could diffuse the situation quickly before the scene turned into a mishmash of inner monologue. She hadn't meant it like that, really! "I was just thinking to myself, that's all. Why don't we just let Blanc's comment go? She's been dealing with quite a bit — we all have — and I think the two of you know better than either of us that things can get said in the heat of the moment that you don't mean. What do you say?"

Neptune and Noire exchanged a look. Leave it to Vert to calmly present a good point like that. Considering the biggest conflicts of Part 2 had been centered around their fights and insecurities, tinged with a hint of misunderstanding... They really couldn't fairly hold Blanc's comment against her, could they?

As the couple seemed to be debating their next course of action through some odd form of wife-speak that took place by communicating through silent expressions, Blanc instead looked in Vert's direction. She was angry at Vert, and in fact she didn't think she could ever _not_ be angry at her, but...

Giving Vert a clumsy, awkward sort of nod, as if that would be enough to show Vert that she had understood Vert had "saved" her, Blanc glanced away, her cheeks tinged with just a little red with an embarrassed blush. Admitting something like that to the person that she was angriest with was goddamn embarrassing, and Blanc hated putting herself out on a limb like that. That was _all_ it was, though. Really.

Despite herself, Vert smiled at Blanc's response.

"It looks like Noire isn't the only one among us who can be a little 'tsundere'..." Vert spoke quietly, watching Lowee's CPU with an amused twinkle in her eyes.

"Hey!" As one, Blanc and Noire turned to Vert and cried out indignantly — Blanc probably to deny such an accusation and comparison, Noire simply out of offense more than likely. After realizing they had taken offense to Vert's comment in unison, the two CPUs almost immediately settled down and shared a look with each other, before turning immediately in the opposite directions. "Hmph." "Tch."

At this, Neptune and Vert exchanged a look of their own, but theirs was a more positive one — Neptune grinned while Vert offered the smaller CPU a pleasant smile. It looked like the situation had been resolved after all. Turning back to the other two CPUs, who had appeared to have settled down a bit more themselves, Neptune decided it was time to try her hand at conversation.

"Rewinding for just a second here, that _has_ been bugging me, now that... Uh..." Neptune frowned, bringing her hand up to stroke her chin. The scene had been moving so fast that she'd forgotten who had actually mentioned the thing that she had wanted to bring up, and now everyone was looking at her! Time to improvise! "Now that _someone_ mentions it, you guys being on the summary too by now would make sense, wouldn't it? Unless... There's a reason for it...?"

This comment, coming from Neptune no less, surprised all three CPUs. It surprised them so much, in fact, that Noire wasn't even bothered that Neptune had apparently forgotten that it was _her, Neptune's wife_, who had been the one to bring up that point earlier.

"Are you okay, Neptune?"

"She must be ill... Maybe we should call Histoire."

"Shit, you probably gave her your 'I'mOkayWithSharingTheSpotlight-itis'! Dammit Noire! Look what you did!"

"Wh- I am not! And what kind of name is that anyway, Miss 'Writer'?"

"A perfectly good one for a disease that _you_ would have-"

"Guys!" Watching the pleasant scene that had been finally starting to develop quickly start to crumble before her eyes, Neptune stood up in her seat to take a few steps in front of the couch and turn around so she could look at her three compatriots, arms crossed and eyes stern. She tapped her foot and clicked her tongue as she looked at them, who were looking from her (concerned) to each other (mostly Blanc and Noire — annoyed). "I'll _always_ be the main character, no matter who we put on the summary. That doesn't mean I can't put some more eye candy on the cover to make whatever I'm being a main character in more appealing. Don't you guys know anything about marketing?"

The three CPUs simply breathed a collective sigh of relief. That was Neptune logic alright.

"You know what? Let's forget all that serious mumbo jumbo and even breaking the fourth wall!" Breaking out into a grin, Neptune motioned to the television set behind her, which, as always, was hooked up to a variety of game consoles, stacks of different games neatly piled to the side. "Haven't you guys realized it yet? This is the first scene in _the entire story_ that's had just all four of us in it together. Can you believe it? We've gone _over a whole year of this_ and been through over _fifty_ whoppers of chapters, but we haven't gotten together through the whole thing _once_! So whaddya say, huh?"

Noire, Blanc, and Vert stared at Neptune.

That was actually pretty darn true. With how things had been developing and playing out, they had barely even managed to get any three of them together to be able to interact at any length after the first chapters when Histoire had gathered the three of _them_ up to make her request. It had either been the married couple or the angry pair for the most part.

"I say I hope you're ready to let me pick what you and I are having for dinner for the rest of the week, because I'm not going to lose." Noire was the first one to reply, a competitive grin spreading across her lips. After all, before they'd been interrupted, she had wanted to do something like this with Neptune from the start. So from the middle, technically.

"In that case, I'm playing winner." Blanc's own competitive streak was sparked almost immediately after seeing Noire's, and though she wasn't as blatant in showing it as the black haired CPU, it was just as evident with her to the three CPU here who knew her. "Kick her ass, Neptune."

"You two are so impatient, honestly... I suppose that leaves me with the winner of the round after that." Vert shook her head, but despite her words, she too was starting to smile a smile that had just a bit of an edge hidden in it.

Smiling broadly at her three friends, each looking raring to go in their own way, Neptune turned to get the console set up and a game running. As she did, something occurred to her. It was nice to be able to spend time with Noire, for sure, but... It was pretty nice to be able to spend time with all of her friends too once in a while, wasn't it?

Maybe things couldn't always be like this in the story all the time, but things were looking up now, weren't they? There were still a few bumps in the road they had left to hit, but...

This story was going to have a happy ending for everyone.

No matter what it took, no matter who ended up with who, she'd make sure of it.


	10. Anniversary Stage 9

"It's so nice that everyone is getting along, isn't it, Iffy?" Compa smiled brightly as she walked around her kitchen, humming a tune as she went. She was preparing a whole bunch of pudding just for the occasion, though whether or not there would be a chance to actually get it all to Neptune remained to be seen. Even so, she wouldn't know unless she tried!

"You're telling me..." Sighing, IF watched her girlfriend work, an exasperated yet equally amused smile playing on her lips as Compa went back and forth. IF had offered to help her more than once, but Compa had finally told her that if IF asked one more time, she would have to leave the kitchen. In the end, that left IF to her role as an observer. At least Compa wasn't at all something she minded observing. "Sometimes I wonder if we'd be better off with another Console Wars... Well, not rea-"

"Iffy! How could you say that?" Waving some kind of utensil at her, Compa had turned on her heel and was looking at IF with such a _frown_. IF offered the girl in pink a sheepish look, one she hoped that told her that she was kidding, but with Compa, one could never be too careful. Luckily, it seemed like Compa had received the message, for she turned back to her cooking efforts soon enough. "I know that things are hard for all of them inside right now, but... They're going to all get past it! I just know it! They got past their fighting, didn't they Iffy?"

Listening to Compa's optimism, IF wanted to smile. It would be really nice if it could all just work out like that, but she just didn't know if it would be that easy this time. It had been hard enough for them to settle their other differences as it was, after all.

"Yeah, they did. Maybe it'll work out just fine after all." Still, this was hardly the time or place to be concerned about such matters. IF would happily free herself of her worries in the story to be able to just enjoy an afternoon with Compa in her kitchen like she was right now... Especially after that... earlier scene...

Just thinking about it got IF blushing furiously. She shook her head and slapped her cheeks, inwardly berating herself. All of these scenes were supposed to be independent from one another, yet almost all of them so far had been referencing other ones! Why were they so terrible at keeping their fourth wall breaking from breaking the fourth wall?!

"Iffy, say 'aaaaaah'."

"Ah?" Thoroughly distracted, IF simply responded as a force of habit to Compa's request. Therefore, when the young woman placed a spoon of pudding in her mouth, IF had no idea it was coming. When it did, the sensory overload that came with it was enough to send a shock from her tongue through her entire body. As Compa removed the spoon, IF was practically dancing up and down as she coughed, attempting to swallow the "delicacy" that she had been offered. "Too sweet! Way too sweet!"

To her complete horror, rather than look surprised and send what she had already made into the trash, this seemed to _please_ Compa, for she clapped her hands together as though that had been the exact result she had wanted to see.

Deciding to forget that for now, IF made her way to the sink, grabbing a glass on the way, to drown out the taste in as much water as she possibly could. She felt _sick_, that had been so sweet! How did Neptune eat that so often...?!

"That was from the sad and lonely plate of rejected puddings that I'm going to throw away." Compa explained cheerfully, watching IF try to cleanse herself from that awful, awful taste as though it was a matter of course for her. Well, at least it wasn't _supposed_ to taste like that... "You looked way too serious, Iffy! So I decided to save you."

"W-With- t-_that_!?" IF barely spluttered through gulps of water. Having finally diluted the taste enough to be able to talk again, IF placed the glass in the sink and reached for some paper towel to wipe her mouth off — she'd made a bit of a mess. "There... There _had_ to have been better ways to do that, Compa..."

"This was the only one that made me feel better about wasting all that food, though." Compa seemed to find this explanation perfectly reasonable, and IF in turn decided that it wasn't worth arguing over. Seeing IF giving in, Compa made her way across the floor once more, picking up a plate of pudding that appeared to have been set for her, maybe...? "_This_ is a good one. Would you like it?"

IF looked at the pudding, wobbling up at her precariously, before she turned back to Compa. It didn't _look_ threatening, but... That other one probably hadn't before she'd been force-fed it, either!

"Well, uh, I thought you were making them for Nep..." The brunette's words died on her tongue as she looked at the pleading expression on Compa's face. Swallowing nervously, IF gingerly took the place from the pink haired girl, earning IF a cry of delight from her before she turned back to what she had been doing, apparently leaving IF's eating of the pudding to herself. "T-Thanks, Compa!"

Normally, IF would have no complaints trying anything Compa made for her, but having more pudding immediately after that... _other_ pudding? Naturally, her first instinct was to be wary. Maybe dispose of the evidence and pretend that she had eaten it... But what if Compa had put something in it that she was supposed to notice? If she just acted like it was fine and normal, she would be caught...!

It looked like she didn't have a choice.

Hesitantly, IF reached for the spoon that had been placed dead center in the pudding, as if waiting to be removed like some kind of ancient, mystical sword. Maybe she would get lucky and the spoon wouldn't come out? This might be some kind of legendary spoon stuck in some kind of legendary pudding, and...

No such luck. It popped right out, because spoons stuck in pudding typically don't require much effort to be removed at all. Silly Iffy.

Taking a large chunk of the pudding out with a single slash of her spoon, IF raised it to her mouth. If nothing else, she could say she had tried a lot of it and wouldn't need to try any more.

"Well... Here we go..."

Hopefully it was just normal pudding with nothing at all wrong with it...

"... Mmmmm!" Eyes sparkling, IF held the spoon in her mouth as she turned to look at Compa, unable to bring herself to remove the spoon. It... It was good! It was really, really good! Compa had outdone herself with this one! Torn between wanting to savor the taste that was still flowing from the spoon to her tongue and throughout her body and wanting to tell Compa how she felt about it, IF began hopping up and down as she slowly finished her treat.

Unlike her previous reaction to IF's "taste test," this time Compa seemed to be genuinely interested in it. She was smiling brightly and watching IF now that she had gotten Compa's attention, apparently having been waiting for the moment when she could find out just how good other people thought it was.

"I'm glad you like it, Iffy...! I worked really hard on it!" Her fists clenched tightly, Compa decided to let IF finish the pudding without interruption now, and returned to her work with a renewed vigor. If she could get that kind of reaction out of everyone, then it would be amazing! "There are a few more over there if you still want more...! Help yourself!"

Making a noise acknowledging that she had heard Compa, IF instead chose to lean against the wall and finish this one pudding for now. Compa had made all of these with everyone in mind, and as good as it was, it wouldn't be fair of her to try to hog it... No matter _how_ good it was.

And it was _really_ good!

Like that, time passed slowly for the two young women. Compa cooked, IF enjoyed her pudding, and overall, it was peaceful. In fact, after IF finished her pudding, she opted to resume watching Compa, as she had been earlier. It was a pleasant moment for the two of them, and despite how simple it was, it was enjoyable. Under normal circumstances, IF wouldn't question this kind of development at all — in fact, if anything, she would take the chance to enjoy it.

However... After a while, IF began to wonder why the scene hadn't ended yet. Thus far, most scenes had started to end on the characters, with the people in it being aware it was coming, yet here... It was just dragging on.

Well... She shouldn't be complaining... But if she was getting all this time to herself with Compa, shouldn't she be using it? Deciding that yes, she should, IF stepped away from the wall she had been leaning against and approached Compa. The fact that they had been just here... existing for so long meant that Compa had made a _lot_ of pudding by now, and it was starting to become a bit concerning to IF.

"Say, Compa, what are you going to do with all of this? There's no real guarantee it'll carry over to another scene, and you'll have to make it all again in the main story if you want to give it to people there. Don't you think you might want to ease up a bit?" IF gave Compa a smile as she said it. She didn't want to come off as hurtful or inconsiderate or anything like that, especially when her intentions were quite the opposite, but considering how excited Compa had been about her reaction, it would be understandable if Compa didn't like the idea of calling it quits...

Thankfully, Compa seemed to get the message. She looked from IF to the the incredible amount of pudding she had made, so vast in amount that it was now spread out across most of the kitchen, before turning back to IF with a sheepish smile.

"Hmmm... Maybe I did overdo it a _little_ bit..." Giggling, Compa began removing her apron from over her clothes — IF stepped forward to help her untie it from behind almost instinctively — and once that was done, she took a moment to stretch out her arms. "Whew! I feel a lot better now! Even if no one eats these, I made them and hopefully someone will. That's good enough for me."

IF laughed. Leave it to Compa to see the bright side in such an unusual situation.

"I just wish everyone could be like that." The Guild member commented to herself, sighing wistfully as she looked at Compa. She admired that about her. Some might call it stupidity or childishness, but IF didn't think so at all. Compa was just... Compa. She worried, just like everyone else did, but she could also take things in stride and try to make them better in ways not everyone else would — there was a reason, out of everyone in the entire world, it had been Compa who IF chose to take with her to try to save the CPUs, and it wasn't just because they were both friends of Neptune. "Maybe then all the problems they're dealing with wouldn't seem so bad."

"Who says they aren't?" ... on the other hand, Compa could also say things like this that still surprised IF. The brunette tilted her head at the strange question Compa had asked, to which Compa replied with a smile. "I think everyone is like that in their own way. Look at how everyone is thinking about love and marriage! That's not a bad thing, is it?"

"N-No, but..." IF glanced away. Marriage for CPUs was different than it was for normal people like them, but... With how things were turning out for Neptune and Noire, it wasn't that different either, so... Should she really say anything...? "For them... I mean, it's not..."

Compa tilted her head.

"It's not what, Iffy?" Taking a step closer, the bright eyed girl took her girlfriend's hand in her own, still smiling brightly, though now her expression had an added bit of concern and... maybe something else in there. "Do you... not like the idea of it? Is that what's been bothering you lately? Marriage?"

"W-W-W-What?" Where was this conversation going...?! W=Were they even talking about CPUs anymore...?! Why was Compa looking at her like that...?! What was going on here...?! Swallowing nervously, a strange sort of excited panic rising in her chest, IF found herself starting to sweat, feeling like her whole body was quickly becoming soaked in it — oh no, Compa would notice! — before she withdrew her hand from Compa's. "I-I don't... I mean, who... Isn't it kind of soon? Hahaha..."

"Soon?" Frowning, Compa slowly reached for IF's hand again. Was that really how IF felt about these things? That was a surprise...! Maybe Compa was misunderstanding her. "I don't understand what you're saying... Do you really have that much of a problem with it? I think it's a long time coming, not soon... Don't you, Iffy...?"

IF couldn't think straight.

Compa was holding her hand.

Compa was talking about marriage.

Was this really happening...?!

The way Compa was looking at her... That tone of voice...

Compa may not have been asking her explicitly, nor might she have been asking her to do it right _now_, but it was clear to IF that the subject was on Compa's mind... Should she have been thinking about it too...? Was it bad that she hadn't...?! Had she failed as a girlfriend...?! After all, Compa had been the one to initiate their first kiss while she still got flustered over hand holding...! Was she going to slow...?! Would Compa leave her for a more exciting "bad girl" someday if she didn't step things up...?!

What should she do...?! What were her options...?!

[FIGHT MONSTROSITY  
>ITEM RUN]<p>

[RUN!]

"The Histoire! I need to go there for Guild!" Blurting out the first jumbled excuse she could think of, IF withdrew from her Compa, bright red and sweating profusely as the world spun around her — her eyes taking on a stereotypical swirled appearance to highlight just how flustered and confused she was. Before Compa could could press the matter further, she turned tail and bolted out of the apartment, crying out a jumbled apology after her as she went.

Tilting her head to the side, Compa crossed an arm under her chest as the other hung at her side.

"Was it something I said?"

Compa didn't understand.

Why would the CPUs all getting married be something that bothered Iffy so much?


	11. Anniversary Stage 10

"There she is... Since this chapter doesn't take place in the real story, it means I'm free to get revenge without consequences."

Cave was not normally a vindictive woman. She was efficient, to the point, and never let her emotions get in the way of her mission. She wanted to say she was like Solid Serpent, but unfortunately, thanks to Noire, she could no longer make that claim (and probably not even that reference) thanks to a character having been invented to fill that exact role.

Though she supposed, now that she thought about it, that just gave her one more reason to be doing what she was doing right now, didn't it?

And what _was_ Cave doing right now?

Why, she was exacting her revenge on Lady Noire, of course! It was a simple, petty thing that normally would never cross her mind. Truthfully, she had gotten over what had happened fairly quickly. The fact of the matter was that she had been calmed significantly after her discussion with Lady Neptune, and her bigger priority during that period had been, of course, calming 5pb. down and helping her get ready for her concert later that evening. After a shock like Lady Neptune barging in on the two of them in such an intimate moment, the poor idol's heart had been pounding even more than it normally did when she went on stage.

She had, however, finally managed to get on stage, and that would have been the end of it...

... if Cave hadn't noticed that there was a segment in the anniversary chapter where Lady Noire was alone. How could she possibly pass up such an opportunity? It would have no effect on the story as a whole or her relationships with anyone. No one would have to know a thing. She could do what she wanted to do here and no one would be none the wiser once this chapter ended. Even better, while originally, the script had been written so that she had been to mistake the _other world's Noire_ for the one she actually _meant_ to go after, that had even been changed as well.

Although... Now that she thought about it, she wondered if maybe she should have brought 5pb. along to do something else that she would have liked to do, or have done to her rather, were there not certain... "consequences" attached to it... An entirely different sort of "consequences," that is, but still, they were things that wouldn't disappear normal-

"What am I saying?" Cave shook her head, torn between being ashamed with and annoyed at herself. The lack of a stable fourth wall was already getting to her...! It was getting in the way of her objective — her petty, meaningless revenge! No matter how good 5pb. looked in that Iris Heart costume, fourth wall or no fourth wall, Cave simply would _not_ ask her to act like-

The redhead's internal monologue was interrupted by the sound of movement below. At the moment, she was perched just above the balcony of Noire's personal bedroom in Lastation.

This was the moment she had been waiting for. All that time (since the beginning of this scene)! All of that preparation (all few paragraphs of it)! Everything she had done (in the past few moments this scene had been running for) came to this!

Lowering herself just enough so she could see inside, Cave pulled out the greatest weapon of all, the mighty device that would send Lady Black Heart to her doom:

A camera Cave had bought on the way to the Basilicom.

While she wouldn't be able to see very well from this distance, certainly not enough to be able to pull off something as precise as the perfect revenge, with this, she could see exactly what Lady Black Heart was doing as she did it, and could react accodingly! It was a foolproof plan, or at least Cave liked to believe it was.

Setting her camera to take a few pictures for her every second, now all Cave needed to do was sit back and watch — and plan out just what she would do next, of course.

The images she was seeing through her camera were... strange. Cave had heard the odd rumor that Lady Black Heart would occasionally engage in the activity of wearing costumes and acting like the characters that belonged to those costumes, but she had never witnessed it before, and what she was witnessing was something she couldn't describe in words.

Lady Black Heart, currently in her human form, had started off by putting on some sort of music (Cave wasn't paying attention to the lyrics — something like about fantasies and the cosmos and love? it didn't sound like a recent song, whatever it was) before... jumping around the room...? Cave had to glance up from the camera to make sure it wasn't malfunctioning, but no, the thing in the room that was certainly Lady Black Heart moving around was definitely moving in the same peculiar manner that she was on her camera's screen.

It looked like she was fighting some kind of invisible enemy. Cave might have suspected she was simply image training, or worse, actually being assaulted by some kind of unseen foe, but Lady Black Heart's current actions said otherwise. First off, she was wearing jeans and a jacket rather than her normal attire, which lended to Cave's theory that she was engaging in her strange hobby. Second, Lady Black Heart's current style of fighting didn't resemble how she normally fought at all. She was throwing herself around and using her fists and kicking at the air, as though she were some kind of hand-to-hand fighter, when it was a well known fact that she wasn't.

It... It almost reminded her of Nisa, but the idea of Lady Black Heart doing something even remotely comparable to Nisa of all people was simply unacceptable — it didn't happen.

Yet... It certainly seemed to be. Before Cave's very eyes in fact.

Over the top movements and jumps that made it look for certain like Lady Black Heart was fighting an invisible enemy in the manner that a "hero" might. Her outfit added to that, but then, as the song continued, Lady Black Heart did the strangest and most amazing thing of all — as though the enemy had actually struck her, she was flung across the room, crashing into the wall as boxes fell around her. Cave could even hear her make some kind of scathing remark to the invisible enemy, as though it had really just struck her.

As Lady Black Heart stood from the "wreckage" that was the fallen boxes, she faced her enemy with a gaze that looked as though she was really fighting an enemy. Then, rather than continuing her battle, she started... Cave didn't even know, but at this point, she found she had actually been taken in by these strange movements of Lady Black Heart's.

First, the CPU had her left fist clenched at her side while her other arm was extended straight towards her foe. After only a mere moment of this, she brought both arms to her right side and began clenching her fists. Cave almost thought her camera had stopped working, but no — Lady Black Heart was holding that position, tightening up every muscle in her body slowly but surely, her gaze cast downward. Strange as this was to observe, there was something almost impressive about the lengths she was going to do... whatever it was that she was doing.

In an instant, after holding the position for at least a few seconds, Lady Black Heart was moving again. Her left fist flew to her hip, palm facing upward and elbow outstretched behind her as she kept it firmly at her side. In this same instant, her right arm followed her other hand, quickly reaching towards it, before, in the next instant, it was that arm that was at her other side now! In that same moment, the arm that had been at her side was thrust forward, pointing straight to the right with all of her fingers outstretched.

Cave would have thought this was more than enough, but Lady Black Heart still wasn't done. Like the arms of a clock going from 10 to 2, her outstretched arm moved in a slow but clearly practiced motion. Finally, for the first time since this strange process began, Lady Black Heart spoke.

"Trans..." It wasn't even a complete word, but it didn't matter — in the next moment, she thrust _both_ arms in the opposite direction now, and with that, it appeared as though she was finished. "... form!"

Cave shielded her eyes from the familiar light of a CPU's transformation as her camera kept taking pictures of every moment of it. When she finally was able to look back at Lady Black Heart's room as the light faded, she was in for the greatest surprise of all.

Apparently having decided it wasn't enough to have her normal outfit in on whatever it was she was doing, because even her HDD form was different. Compared to how Lady Black Heart normally appeared, significantly less skin was showing in this new form. Besides for stripes of yellow and red around her wrists, ankles, and neck, and a silver belt around her waist, everything about this new form was black, save for the processor unit in her hair, which looked as though it was almost some kind of helmet — red orbs on either side of it, with two prongs sticking out almost like antenna of sorts.

Finishing off her routine, Lady Black Heart did a few more poses, which culminated in her leaping through the air and landing on her bed in the most triumphant post of all.

"Nep Ranger... Black!"

She held it for a few moments... then finally collapsed onto her bed, letting out what seemed to be a satisfied laugh.

At long last, Cave realized she had gotten so distracted that she hadn't enacted her revenge.

As Lady Black Heart was floated over to computer — apparently, she had had her camera filming her the entire time, probably for her own personal collection — Cave decided it was time to withdraw. Turning off her camera, she began to sneak away from the balcony. Thinking on it, this was actually going to be a lot easier than she had thought — she could simply post these online. Her hands would be free of blame in these matters, and Lady Black Heart would suffer an embarassing situation of her own.

All in all, it was a harmless little act that...

"Wait... What's this in the window...? Is that... _a person_...?!"

Cave's eyes widened as she heard the voice coming from the room below.

Time to go.

And in a motion not unlike the ones Lady Black Heart had been making just moments earlier, Cave leapt off of the side of the building, twirling and spinning in midair. As calm looking as ever, Cave glanced towards where the viewers might be and gave them a salute of sorts before she spoke, all still while she was falling.

"See you next Sunday morning, kids. Be sure to buy all the new Masked Megami Black toys that you saw in today's episode."

Landing perfectly on the ground below, Cave turned from the "camera" and began dashing off, giving this week's exciting episode of Masked Megami Black the perfect ending.

Wait... Wasn't it supposed to be this week's episode of the Nep Rangers...?


	12. Anniversary Stage 11

"This _stinks_!"

Sighing rather dramatically, Noire slumped into her favorite work chair. She wasn't sure whether or not she should be thankful about what was happening thus far or incredibly, _incredibly_ annoyed. She was currently torn between the two emotions, but as neither one was a particularly enjoyable one to be feeling, she honestly wished she could just toss both of them out.

"First my big confession scene gets preempted by a stupid cliffhanger gag, and now every single one of the scenes I was _supposed_ to be in here got rewritten to either not have me in it or be about the _other_ me! When do I get a turn?" Raising a hand to rub at her temples, the Lastation CPU groaned as she realized that, to top it all off, she was now spending the only scene she probably _would_ get in this special complaining about it all. Even her universe's Vert and Blanc had done something more entertaining!

She would just look like a big spoil sport if she didn't do anything now...

But... But would could she do...?

There was no way she would do something that involved an audience, and thanks to that stupid joke, she couldn't interact with Plutia normally either since the scene's resolution was supposed to still be shrouded in mystery! Talk about unfair. That didn't mean they couldn't have some kind of goofy segment, did it? But apparently Plutia hadn't even been planned for any of these...

... Now there was an idea...

Yeah... That was something. Special chapter or not, she wouldn't mind going to find Plutia right now at all. So what if she hadn't gotten to beat up Anonydeath or get accidentally attacked by a crazy redhead she didn't know? She should be thankful for those things! No, now was her chance to do something she wanted to do. Now was her chance to do something for her.

"If I could have one scene that _I_ got to pick in this whole thing, then I'd want to do that. Definitely." Nodding to herself, Noire stood up from her chair. She looked at it for a moments, then a flash of brilliance struck her. Smirking to herself, Noire gave the chair a nice, long look, before she spoke to it, as though she was commanding something far greater than herself or a simple chair. "It's a good thing I brought this with me to Planeptune. Plutia's furniture just wasn't cutting it."

With that done, Noire waited. Not for long, mind, but just long enough to see whether or not her idea would have any merit to it...

Heading to the door of the room, Noire took a deep breath and opened, not sure what to expect.

What greeted her made her grin.

She was in Planeptune's Basilicom.

"It _worked_! Take that, scripts!" Puffing out her chest arrogantly, Noire took a few steps into the hallway and looked both ways. Everything seemed normal enough — it looked like all she had done was pull off a little trick. "And here Vert was trying to rewrite the story and make the people make things happen for her. That's not _nearly_ proactive enough." A giggle escaped her lips. She had really done it! This scene might turn out okay yet. "Now that's what I call using your head, Noire."

But just how _had_ the lovely CPU used her head anyway? Why was she so pleased?

It was a simple trick, really. Well, maybe not _that_ simple, since Vert hadn't figured to try it out.

Since her location hadn't been specified during the opening sequence, if she just acted as though she was supposed to be _in_ Planeptune before the narration reached that point naturally, then it looked as though Noire had free reign over what was going to happen to her. She would bet, though, that she couldn't contradict anything she'd already said, so for better or for worse, now she was stuck in Planeptune.

"That's just what I wanted, though, so I'm not going to complain." Smirking, Noire began heading towards where she suspected she might find Plutia. She couldn't believe her luck! So she couldn't interact with Plutia "normally" — if she had an office in Plutia's Basilicom and enough pull to control the furniture, then whatever happened next was totally within the rules of that restriction! All that meant is the following scene would play out as if such a thing were natural. How could _that_ possibly be a bad thing?

It couldn't, that's how.

Loopholes, thy name is Noire.

Fighting the urge to hum as she walked along and inwardly celebrated her victory, Noire finally found herself outside of the door that she would open up and find the oh so familiar room where most things seemed to happen in this place — and most importantly, where the one person Noire wanted to see most out of everyone else in this ridiculous story would be undoubtedly waiting for her.

Despite the fact that she had been the one to "arrange" them meeting this way, Noire found herself growing nervous. Neither she nor Plutia could reference what had happened at the end of Noire's attempted confession scene in any way, or this scene would undoubtedly get cut short, but...

Noire furiously shook her head, pushing open the door as she pushed thoughts like that far away.

"I don't care how she acts or what happens next! I just want to see her!"

The room was as it should have been. Just as Noire had wanted, she really was in Planeptune's Basilicom, and everything that thus came with that. Which meant, somewhere in this room...

"Hello, Noire..." At the sound of a familiar, drawn out voice, the exact slowly spoken voice that Noire was hoping to hear, under normal circumstances, she might have jumped. Under normal circumstances, upon hearing Plutia's voice, Noire might have put on her normal attitude and defenses and layers and started their usual routine. "I was waiting for you..."

None of these things were possible for Noire right now, because Plutia was pressing her against the wall and nuzzling her neck like it was a perfectly normal thing to do.

"P-P-P-P-P-Plu-Pla-Plo-" In an instant, Noire was blushing bright red and trying to struggle and escape from Plutia's grip, but despite how gentle Plutia was being, she found she couldn't. In fact, to her horror, her arms were wrapping around Plutia's waist, her hands settling on Plutia's behind against her will, as if being controlled by some unseen force.

"Please... Do this? Is that what you want, Noire...?" Speaking slowly, deviously, feigning-innocence-ly, and of course, tantalizingly, in that taunting sort of way only Plutia could talk to her (funnily enough, _that_ was something that wasn't too different from normal here), Plutia's fingers began slipping into the upper part of Noire's skirt.

W-Why was this happening...?! How had it happened...?!

"Kya!"

_Why did it feel so good?!_

No, N-Noire, stop, don't get distracted! Think! Nothing strange happened before this, nothing except... Wait... Was this _her_ fault...?! If she had an office in Planeptune's Basilicom and the pull to change things like furniture in and out as she willed... T-Then... based on that premise...

D-D-D-Did this scene take place in some kind of alternate reality where she and Plutia were super intimate?!

_"I don't care how she acts or what happens next! I just want to see her!"_

Oh _great_! Even if her first bit of scene building hadn't done it, that had totally made this possible, hadn't it?! It had practically set up all the flags for it and everything in fact!

"Your top is reeeaaally getting _annoying_, Noire... I think I _hate it_. Sooooo, I'm going to take it off, _okay_? Hoooold stiiiii~iiiiill..."

_W-W-W-W-W-W-W-WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?!_

She wasn't ready! Who even cared about her confession anymore?! She barely got this far with Plutia in her _dreams_, forget whatever reality was like! Ohhh, why couldn't she have just enjoyed having a normal scene to herself instead of trying to cheat the system...?! Darn it, no matter! She had to think fast before the rating of the story skyrocketed and her blunder caused them to get canceled!

She just... She just had to think of a way to change the scene again and make Plutia stop...

... But... But...

_She actually really really really wanted to stay here!_

Torn between a rock and a really, really, _really really really_ soft place, Noire desperately tried to look Plutia in the eye so she could reason with her. Maybe... Maybe she could just talk to her and say something to turn Plutia back to normal! Or at least get her to slow down enough so they could keep going without having to... Wait, no! Bad Noire! Very bad!

As she finally met Plutia's gaze for just a moment, still unsure of what she wanted to do, that look into the renowned sadist's eyes gave her the answer that she needed.

It was... sobering in a way.

This wasn't a dream. It may not have been taking place in the story proper, but it was still "real," so this... thing was a "real" Plutia. Maybe from a different story, maybe from a warped scene she had created through her own intervention, but...

Plutia didn't look at her that way.

There was something missing.

This was wrong.

"Oh wait, that's right... A-Ah! I'm actually on vacation in the other dimension...! This must be a dream I'm having because I... because I..." Noire closed her eyes, ignoring the pleasant things the girl pressed against her was doing — though with her mind made up, they actually even _felt_ less pleasant now — so she could focus and think of something reasonable. No longer was she torn between trying to stay in this reality or whatever it was and fixing it, now she just wanted out. "Because I walked in on the other me and Neptune doing something dirty last night!"

The Plutia before her withdrew from Noire, looking surprisingly wounded for whatever she was, but that had done the trick. Not sure if she should feel thankful or regretful, especially now that this _was_ technically just a dream, Noire began fixing her clothes — promptly glancing away from Plutia's state of attire when she realized that her own hands, while they had been out of her control, had been rather busy too.

Most of all, though... As she started to hear a strange ringing noise and as the world around her began to fade and blur...

She felt relief.

She wasn't sure if it was the right thing to do or not, but in her heart...

Unless it was a dream, the only Plutia she wanted to be with, in this way or any other way, was the real one.

"So... I guess that's what Neptune meant when she said it was really obvious... that I wasn't the right one..." Noire mumbled quietly, feeling like she was both falling asleep and waking up all at the same time. The world around her almost didn't exist anymore and she could barely remember what she had just been doing.

"Huh? What I meant when I said what was obvious? Hey, Noire, has anyone ever told you you sleep talk?"

Slowly opening her eyes, Noire let out a yawn as she took in her surroundings. Familiar, but not... No, she wasn't sure where she had just been, or why she would think that she should be somewhere else. The only place she would have been before this was right here in bed, in this guest room in Neptune's Basilicom. She was on vacation, after all. She couldn't remember why she had decided to come _here_ of all places, considering it was _Neptune's_ Basilicom...

... and plopped on the bed next to her was none other than Neptune herself, watching her with an amused expression and twinkling eyes that practically screamed "I am teasing you right now."

Her cheeks starting to burn a furious red, Noire moved to shove Neptune off the side of the bed as horrible, horrible memories of the night before returning to her as she woke up in full. At least the cry Neptune made when she landed on the floor made her feel a little better.

Still... Why did she feel like she was missing something? For some reason, she almost felt she should feel proud of herself — and she definitely felt just a little bit homesick.

"Awww, Noire, just 'cause you like Plutie doesn't mean you can get kinky like that with _me_, I'm a _pure_..." Lifting herself off of the floor, Neptune trailed off when she watched the other Noire's reaction to her mentioning Plutia. Wow, that was just a little bit tactless of her, wasn't it? What if Plutia had rejected her? Man, she'd feel like a real tool if that had been how it went down... "Hey, want breakfast? Me too! I'm gonna go see if Noire's done! She's bailing once she's done, so I'm taking mine to go with hers, but you're totally welcome to chowing down while we're gone. Bye!"

With that, Neptune, more than a little guiltily, dashed off, leaving Noire to her own devices.

For some reason, rather than feel upset or anything like what Neptune had suspected, she actually felt... good.

She didn't know why or what or anything else, but what Noire _did_ know was that she was sure that she had made a good choice... about something, and it had involved Plutia... somehow. She couldn't really figure out the context of it beyond that, but the feeling it gave her right now told her one thing for sure.

She had definitely made the right choice.


	13. Anniversary Stage 12

Love was tough.

It didn't always end up sparkles and rainbow( colored pudding)s. Even when it did, as Neptune and Noire could attest to from their various dramas that took place over the course of Part 2, that didn't mean it was still going to always be smooth sailing. If a couple wanted to stay together, they had to work together, and that could be a lot tougher than it sounded sometimes.

Others would argue that those who said that were just getting cocky in their having something that they didn't. These others were those, naturally, who were cursed with the unfortunate fate of their love being... _unrequited_.

And among these others cursed with the unfortunate fate of their love being unrequited were two girls who were all too familiar with Neptune and Noire's drama, at least in a manner of speaking. Though their relationship with that drama couldn't be more different, one thing remained: They were irreversibly attached to the ever unfolding story that was the tale of Neptune and Noire.

However, these were two lovely ladies who did not normally get to meet. In fact, if not for the circumstances of this anniversary chapter, it wouldn't be at all strange to say they might never interact with each other at all. Luckily for the viewers at home around Gamindustri (though perhaps unluckily for them), thanks to a previously established concept in one of the earlier scenes of this chapter, a concept has been introduced that has allowed the two of them to finally meet for the first time!

That's right...

Tonight, the story opens on a very special Rebooted and Unrequited Relationships Anonymous meeting. What's more, tonight's meeting was focusing specifically on the members who were "in" relationships of the _Unrequited_ variety. "In" rather than simply in because, well, being unrequited, these people are obviously not actually in relationships with the objects of their affection, much as they may desire it.

"... which is why I blew up his house, so he would know he _always_ has _me_ there for him!"

The current speaker smiled brightly at the other members as she finished speaking, her eyes twinkling with manic delight and pride at the... the _thing_ that she had just described doing. The rest of the members forced themselves to clap, and those who were wearing hats or jackets with hoods instinctively lowered them, as to better block their face's from the young schoolgirl's view. Some were even bold enough as to look away, but the chill they felt go down their spine made them regret it almost immediately.

"Y-Yes, well, thank you, Miss Yan, we all wish the best..." The NPC running the meeting smiled awkwardly as she tried to get everyone's attention off of the laundry list of felonies that they had just heard so that they could get back on topic — that topic being their _own_ miserable relationships and the felonies resulting from them, of course! "Okay everyone, who wants to talk next? I believe we have a few new members with us today, why don't one of you take the stage? If you're comfortable speaking, that is!"

Spread around the room, a few more noticeable faces had been lurking in the shadows, trying not to be seen. Of course, considering some of those shadows were in fact the shadowy figures of the NPCs that were the other members of the meeting (luckily most of them had recieved upgrades to full bodied profiles), it was a bit hard to miss them.

There were some pretty big names among their ranks tonight, and word had spread! Someone who knew one of their top members was here!

"F-Fine, I guess I can..." Standing up from a spot in the back of the room was none other than the legendary Lady Black Sister! Even amongst NPCs, the raging storm of unrequited love that she felt for Lady Purple Sister was known far and wide! To the younger members of the group, she was like their _idol_. Luckily for her, not being transformed, she could pass off as a cosplayer in her human form, as her sister was occasionally prone to doing (unbeknownst to her, of course). As the CPU Candidate surveyed the group of people looking at her, she found her cheeks flushing. She couldn't believe she was doing this!

But now that Nepgear was awake, she had to start somewhere, didn't she? Maybe coming to a meeting like this was the first step in figuring out what she should do with herself. She had quickly begun to realize that approaching Nepgear now that she was up again would just... _not_ work given everything that had happened... But maybe now she could work out her feelings this way?

Taking a deep breath as she made her way to the front of the room, stepping up behind the podium meant for speakers just below the banner that displayed the group's name proudly, Uni just hoped that this wouldn't be a huge mistake.

"H-Hi, everybody!" Waving nervously at the crowd, Uni felt as though she wanted to turn into a puddle. The only person in the entire world who even had an _inkling_ of how she felt about Nepgear was Neptune, _Neptune_ of all people, and she had just volunteered to talk about those feelings to a room full of strangers! What was she supposed to do?! "I-I'm... Well, I'm new here, and-"

Before Uni could continue, the room erupted in a chorus of "Hi, Newhere!" from the people seated in the room. At first, Uni was about to correct them and snap at them, but watching them, she realized that they hadn't done it out of slowness or to mock her — rather, they were welcoming her. They understood she was nervous and obviously dealing with some problems, otherwise she wouldn't be here, and were trying to make it easier on her.

Oddly enough, it actually kind of worked.

Smiling a little at the crowd, Uni laughed weakly and felt herself relaxing.

"Right! So, um, about the person I like... I don't really know what to say about how we are now, but... I want it to be different in the future." Nodding to herself, Uni stood up just a little straighter. This much she could certainly say, couldn't she? "I-I mean, she probably doesn't even see me that way at all, b-but she's going through a hard time right now, a-and I... I want to help her somehow. I don't know how, o-or if I even can, because, well, she's actually kind of in a coma, and-"

"Too bad it's not your dumb sister that's the one in the coma..."

The room went silent as the words, suddenly spoken as they were, hung in the air, almost like a noose had inexplicably dropped down from the ceiling. The comment had come from a seat in the front. Those seats had been filled by all of the regular members when Uni had arrived, so whoever had said it had to be someone who came here pretty often — it was probably why no one was saying anything either. They must have had a lot of power...

Uni was sure she had recognized the voice, but having been taken off guard by the comment itself, she hadn't been able to place it. As she surveyed the front rows, hoping to find a familiar face, her eyes widened when her gaze finally settled on an a familiar scowl.

Sitting in the second row, arms crossed and her face aimed at the wall, expression set in a rather nasty scowl indeed, was none other than Blanc, the CPU of Lowee.

Clenching a fist, Uni stepped away from the podium and began approaching the CPU. The various group members, NPCs and even familiar faces (was that _Pirachu_ scampering off...?) among them all getting out of her way. It was clear to them that this friendly little meeting was about to turn into something much, much different.

"Say that again." Uni was not exactly the type of person known to get angry, and she wasn't even known for her pride — unfortunately for her, the "best" things she was known for were for her "shrinking" bust and her self-image issues. Indeed, it being Uni of all people towering over Blanc meant that it was probably not the most threatening thing in the world to her.

That stuff didn't matter right now, though. Even this meeting didn't matter. When it came to Uni, people just _didn't_ talk badly about her sister in front of her and get away with it — and they certainly didn't say _they wished she was in a coma_ and get away with it!

"Say it again. Come on." As if she was warning Blanc, Uni repeated herself. She was positively furious right now, for her sister's sake, but also for Planeptune's as well. If her sister hadn't been there, where would they be right now? Did Blanc not care at all? Uni knew that the CPU could be harsh at times, but to think she could be so... _cruel_... It was unbelievable!

Just when it looked as though Blanc was going to sit there and do nothing, perfectly content with ignoring Uni, the CPU turned to the Candidate and looked at her.

She looked angry.

Really? Seriously? She had made such a horrible comment and _she_ was angry?

Well, fine! That was just fine with Uni — if she was going to get mad that Uni dared to stand up for _her sister_, then Uni would just be even angrier too!

"Sorry about this. I'll see you guys next week." Then, just like that, Blanc had looked away from her and was leaving. She had stood up and was already almost out of the door. No cursing or yelling or smashing or breaking or anything. She just left, just like that! She hadn't even so much as acknowledged Uni!

That was what really stung. She had been making progress, but... She just _hated_ when people treated her that way!

"I-I'm leaving too!" Without thinking about what she would do once she caught up to Blanc, only thinking that she would do it and get to the bottom of that horrible comment, Uni didn't even look at any of the other members of the meeting as she followed after the retreating CPU, simply hoping it wasn't too late to catch up with her.

Anger and confusion were the primary emotions she was feeling as she exited the gymnasium, storming outside of it and looking around frantically, fisted clenched as she realized she was all too ready to give that CPU a piece of her mind... However, in doing this, she realized too little too late that if Blanc had flown away, she would be stuck with no way to track her down in time to say what she wanted to say or do what she wanted to do.

"Tch... You followed me? What the hell is wrong with you? I could kill you, you know."

Uni's eyebrows shot up as high as they could go at the casual remark that the CPU made from behind her, spinning around to gape at the brown haired girl. K-K-K-Kill?! Where was this coming from?! Sure, it was kind of true given their drastically different levels of strength, but... Was she really that upset?

Crossing her arms angrily as the question floated through her mind, Uni tossed a hand through one of her twintails — in a manner that was not at all unlike Noire.

"Of course I followed you! You said something horrible about my sister for no reason at all! Why would you think I would let you do that without saying anything?" Was that really how little people thought of Uni? That they could say what they wanted in front of her and she would just let them? If that was the case, then White Heart or no White Heart, this goddess in front of her was about to learn herself a very harsh lesson indeed.

To her surprise, despite the CPU's rather violent reputation, Blanc simply chose to shift in place and look up towards the night sky.

"I didn't think you would hear me. I come here to vent, just like you were doing, so I vented." Blanc shrugged. "Only thing I did wrong was speak out of turn. If you hadn't made a scene, you would've gotten to listen to me bitch and moan when it got to be my turn up there anyway, so it doesn't matter one way or the other when you heard it, now does it?"

Uni hadn't expected a reaction like this from Blanc. It was almost like the CPU was... confiding in her? No... That couldn't be it. That definitely, under no circumstances, could possibly be what was happening. Blanc wasn't the kind of person to _confide_ in people — that was probably why she was an anonymous meeting! Because she couldn't talk to people she kn...

... Oh. _She_ didn't exactly know Blanc that well, even though they were both technically main characters, did she? That would explain that then...

... which means... maybe she _was_ being confided in...?

Still... As... As _interesting_ a fact as that was... That didn't explain why she said what said!

"So you would have said something like that about my sister when you got a turn anyway? Then I still would have said something, even if _I_ would have been out of turn." Uni finally responded, making sure she came off as firm as she felt on the subject. Her sister had barely even spoken to Blanc over the course of the story, at least as far as she knew, so there was absolutely no reason for them to be angry at Noire.

As she looked at Uni, Lowee's CPU didn't seem to be in a particularly good mood, but at the same time, she didn't seem too invested in the idea of leaving either. Uni realized that if Blanc had been at the meeting, as she had been, that meant she probably _had_ wanted to talk to someone.

... Oh no... Don't tell her... That didn't mean... _Her_, did it...?

"Let me put it into words you can understand, squirt." Uni narrowed her eyes at the comment from Blanc — who was she to talk like that? They were practically the same size! Despite Uni's clear dislike of the comment, however, Blanc continued on, looking like she felt increasingly more awkward about the conversation with every word she spoke. "The reason you were in there is... Shit... Do I have to say it...? Okay, I know, _your_ reason is _related_ to the reason _I_ was in there."

Uni tilted her head. That had sounded like a big hint, but she couldn't figure it out. What was the CPU saying? Was this some kind of cryptic goddess code? A riddle maybe?

Seeing this as a chance to impress a CPU, Uni furrowed her brows and put all of her energy into figuring out just what Blanc could have been getting out, completely missing the flabbergasted look on Blanc's face when she hadn't answered immediately.

"Let's see..." Uni had gone to the meeting because of her lack of self-confidence. She... wasn't sure how she could approach Nepgear, especially now that Nepgear was awake. She had been really excited at the prospect of making games with Nepgear, but she couldn't just... go up to her and... and get it on with her! Nepgear was probably super confused, and... What was Uni supposed to do? Obviously, Uni was also there because Nepgear didn't return her feelings as far as she knew, but Uni figured that was probably redundant.

Putting that all together... And making it _related_ instead of the _same_ as her reasons...

"I've got it!" Placing her hands on her hips, Uni turned to the CPU before her and beamed. "You have _some_ self-confidence, but not enough to go for the person you like, so you're coming here to work up more. You also aren't sure how you can approach the person, because they sleep a lot. _They_ want to make games with you, but you don't... want... Um... Why are you looking at me like that? This is related, isn't it? It's Plutia, right?"

Slapping her forehead, Blanc grabbed her hat off of the top of her head and tossed in on the ground.

"Is it _really_ that hard? It's not _any_ of that crap, it's _related_ because the _person_ that has _me_ here is _related_ to the _person_ that has _you_ here. How hard is that to figure out?!" Blanc shook her head and bent down to retrieve her hat, truly surprised that the CPU Candidate hadn't figured it out the instant she had used the word "related." How much more obvious could she have gotten than that? "Freaking kids... It's because your consoles don't have any games that make you think like Lowee's do, that's what this is... It's all about blowing stuff up or stripping people with you guys..."

Uni wasn't paying attention to Blanc's further comments — not now, when the hint she had been given had been spelled out so clearly to her.

Where was Uni? At a meeting about unrequited feelings.

Who was the person that Uni had unrequited feelings for? Nepgear.

And who was related to Nepgear...?

Patting her hat, Blanc watched in morbid amusement as the gears turned in Uni's head. Her mouth began opening more and more, slowly but surely, and her eyes were getting wider and wider as she slowly raised a hand, a _shaking_ hand at that, to point at Blanc. Despite herself, Blanc couldn't help but smirk at the shocked CPU Candidate. Took her long enough.

"Ho... Ho..."

Blanc rolled her eyes. Really? "Ho"? That was the best this kid could do? Even her sisters were more creative with their insul-

"_HOME WRECKER!_"

There we go.

Her smirk fading as the CPU Candidate quickly closed the distance between them, Blanc closed her eyes as Uni grabbed her by the collar, almost foaming at the mouth like a rabid little animal. Blanc paid no mind to Uni's words and instead raised a hand to knock the two at her collar away.

"If I'm such a home wrecker, then why am I whining about poor little Blanc's feelings at a place like this instead of, oh... I don't know, _actually wrecking somebody's home_?" Despite the fact that she knew damn well she was in the right here, Blanc still couldn't bring herself to look at Uni. She felt shitty enough about this whole situation, she didn't want to see what the Candidate thought about it — and she sure as hell didn't want the pity. "I made one comment in one stupid scene that isn't even part of the story because I'm a selfish bitch full of selfish regrets. Show me anywhere where I've tried to screw with the two of them. Go on. Open up the story on your phone and look through the whole thing if you want, I'll wait."

Stepping away from the CPU, who was clearly beating up herself more than Uni ever could, all for simply _caring_ about someone else, Uni knew that she didn't have to look at even a single paragraph to know that she'd been wrong.

"S-Sorry." Still... This was a shock. Blanc... had feelings for Neptune? She... actually _could_ relate to that. Really well, even... Uni pictured those certain, closer times that she'd seen Nepgear with Vert, with the twins, with those people from the other dimension... even with Neptune too! It wasn't a fun feeling at all, even when she knew there wasn't anything to it... But what Blanc must be feeling, knowing the person she liked was out of her reach _forever_... What she felt couldn't even be comparable to that. "I didn't..."

"Damn right you didn't. No one else knows about it after all." Arms hanging at her side, Blanc shot Uni a look that told her if she told anyone else about this, even in the context of this special anniversary chapter, it'd be the last thing she ever told anyone. "Well... Vert might. Blonde bimbo. Way too nosy for her own good. That doesn't mean you can go gossip about me to her."

"Huh?" Uni blinked. Her and... Vert? Sure, the CPU had always been especially nice to her, affectionate even, but... Uni just wasn't the gossiping type — and Vert wouldn't be the person she went to anyway! Vert was her competition! Sort of! If... If she was even in the race, anyway... Thinking like that, Uni couldn't help but sigh. Maybe she'd be in Blanc's position soon enough herself. "Um... Don't worry. I won't tell anyone."

Blanc eyed the girl for a moment, before she shook her head and took a step forward.

"Good." Taking another step forward, getting dangerously close to Uni's personal bubble, the CPU did something she hadn't thought she would after Uni had chased her. Maybe she felt like she could make a difference, maybe she felt a stupid sense of camaraderie, maybe... something, it didn't matter. Regardless, she took a step forward, stepping behind Uni, and spoke. "Listen... I'm going to talk to myself for a second, okay? I'm about to pretend I have a chance to talk to myself from before the story started. This has _nothing_ to do with you. I'm just talking to _myself_.So don't go interrupting."

Turning around to look at the CPU, who was now looking away from her, Uni tilted her head to the side, confused. Had all of that confiding broken the CPU? Should she call someone? Should she...

"Hey, you. Yeah, you, the dumbass tilting her head like she doesn't know who's talking to her." Uni's eyes widened. W-Wait, was... Was Blanc...? No, she couldn't be... But she _had_ to be... "Good work, 'me,' you're catching on. Stop thinking and listen up. You're only going to get one shot with her. I screwed mine up and I'm _still_ not over it, but it doesn't have to be the same for you. You still have a chance, so make it count. Don't sit on your ass, don't bitch about what ifs, just get out there and take the risk. You're just going to end up bitter and confused like me if you don't, and right now, being me _sucks_."

For a moment, the two were quiet. Blanc considered... No, that was it. Having said what she wanted to say, Blanc began walking. Despite this, Uni found herself smiling at the retreating CPU.

"Y-You know... Don't take this the wrong way, but... I think you're a lot nicer than my sister says you are."

Uni fought back a giggle as Blanc stumbled in her steps, clearly having not expected the sudden complement, tsun as it may have been.

"S-Shut it. And you should listen to your sister! Or... Actually, what do I know? I don't care what you do. I was just talking to myself. I forgot you were here. Do what you want." Shaking her head, the brunette CPU continued on her way, muttering something about stupid candidates and lolicon blondes to herself. Uni couldn't catch it, but she figured she probably had a good idea.

Now she just had to hope that someone could give her a similar pep talk for real when it came time for her to need it.


	14. Anniversary Stage 13

"WAIT... A... _MINUTE_!"

Noire jumped a foot into the air at Neptune's outburst. She had almost transformed into Black Heart and flown straight through the ceiling she had been so surprised by the sudden cry from Neptune! _Now_ what was going on!? It had better be good!

At the moment, the pair of CPUs were relaxing in their bed, having wound up there due to... due to... Well, let's just say it was due to reasons. T-They were just practicing for the new game, that was all! It was _not _like that! That was a totally different scene, after all!

In _any_ case, the pair of CPUs were relaxing in their bed when all of a sudden, Neptune had sat up in her bed, screamed so loudly that the entire country had probably heard, and had then started tapping at her phone with some kind of crazed fury, the likes of which Noire had never seen. Was it because she didn't have her computer right now? Was that it?

Rubbing her ears, which felt like they were pounding inside, Noire rolled onto her side and gave Neptune the dirtiest look she could muster — which was saying something considering the looks she had been giving her wife just a little while ago, though this was a rather different sort of "dirty" compared to those.

"What is it Neptune? I was trying to go to sleep... At least I think I was." Groaning, the Lastation CPU sat up herself, rubbing her forehead in frustration. It had been such a nice... however long it had been too. Time didn't exactly flow normally in non-canon anniversary chapters, especially considering this was the only segment connected to any of the others beyond mere mentions. Had it been hours? A day? Was she supposed to be tired or feel refreshed? She was so confused! She wanted to get back to the real story already! The people of Gamindustri were probably going to hate this for wasting so much of their time with a pointless chapter anyway, couldn't they get it over with already?!

"We missed one, Noire! This is super duper important, so hurry up and look! Forget about sleeping or being Pervy Heart for a minute and look at this!" Neptune held out her phone towards Noire, her arm going up and down and up and down and to be perfectly honest, in her sleepy state, the almost-completely-naked-but-for-underwear body attached to that arm was looking kind of hypnotic with the way Neptune was movi...

As her eyes began to focus on the image on the screen, rather than the hypnotic movements going on behind the phone, Noire couldn't even find it in her to deny Neptune's claim. Like a snake, her arm snapped forward and grabbed Neptune's wrist ("Kya! So bold! _Now hurry and read_!") to steady the bouncing CPU so she could properly read and look at just what the

"T-This is..."

That concept art... Those new character designs... That... _Neptune_ looking person... Was this...?

"It's the next console game! Like, connected to the story! For reals!" Neptune cried out, the excitement in her voice evident as she resumed bouncing around as Noire gingerly removed the phone from her wife's hand.

"We're even moving up a console..." Noire whispered. She couldn't help but feel excited — they were paving the way for the next generation! This was seriously big news! How had they missed it during the first segment? ... And why was Neptune peering at her chest like that? Was it because of how that segment had ended? Flushing, Noire pulled up a blanket to shield herself from Neptune's eyes. "W-What? Stop that."

"_You_ stop it." Ignoring Noire's protests, Neptune tugged the blanket down and began inspecting her body like Vert did her lewd figures ("I do not!" came an indignant cry from a few scenes away) rather than like how someone would look at such an intimate part of her wife. "And hold still! Since you're based on the consoles we're on and 'the consoles we're on' is being 'upgraded,' I'm trying to see if _you_ got 'upgraded' too..."

"_What_?!" Shoving Neptune to the side, Noire pulled up the blanket once more and proceeded to wrap it around her as much as she could. "Why would _that_ be how I get upgraded?! Maybe I'm stronger! Maybe my stats went up! Why does it have to be my chest?! Why did you look there first before anywhere else?!"

"I wanted the excuse to look." Neptune's reply was offered bluntly and without missing a beat, not even grinning about it — she just felt like she could say something like that! How was it that Neptune could always say such ridiculous things with a straight face?! Couldn't she at least wait until they were off screen or something? "Come on, you're no fun. Besides, it's not like it's nothing I haven't- Ow! Hey, be careful with that!"

Naturally, Noire's response had been to fling Neptune's phone right at her head.

"Idiot!" Making sure the blanket was secure, Noire looked down towards the mattress, now bare of any blankets to speak of, and felt her cheeks warming up. "You don't need an _excuse_, just don't be like _this_ about it... Really, Neptune..."

Still recovering from the near-fatal wound Noire had caused her by throwing such a dangerous weapon, Neptune naturally had completely missed the fact that Noire had been all but jumping up and down dressed in absolutely nothing but an event flag moments earlier. Instead, she had resumed looking at the phone like nothing had happened. After all, this was some awesome stuff!

"You're just mad you don't get a sexy new design like I do. Even if it's not teeeechnically _me_... I am _hot_!" Grinning broadly at the picture on the phone, Neptune began tapping and pinching and tapping some more so that she could get the best possible look at this "older Neptune." At first, it was really exciting to see, but the more she looked at the pictures, the more her grin began to falter. "Though... She's not _that_ good looking... I mean..."

Letting the blanket begin to slip off of her so she could lean over and get a better look, Noire raised an eyebrow as she watched the changes taking place in her wife. If she didn't know better... But no, no one would possibly think like _that_...

"Hey, at this angle, she kinda looks fat, doesn't she? Right? Right?"

Neptune wasn't feeling self-conscious of herself... because of a picture of a different version of _herself_... was she? That would be like getting jealous of Purple Heart!

"Yeah, now that I look at it some more, she's super ugly. Boy am I glad it's some chick from another dimension and not _me_ they did that too." Neptune shook her head, setting the phone down dismissively and crossing her arms behind her head.

Noire couldn't believe it. She couldn't help but smile seeing Neptune acting like this.

Only Neptune would act like this over herself.

"I-I am too." Discarding the blanket completely, Noire slid over to Neptune's side and proceeded to wrap her arms around the CPU's waist. Flushing at such a bold move, Noire set that to the side to focus on Neptune — even if this scene wasn't "real," she wasn't about to her her wife feel like she wasn't good looking. "T-To me... She doesn't have anything on the original."

Despite her misgivings about that _other_ Neptune now, if that was how Noire felt about the situation... Then, needless to say, Neptune found herself feeling significantly better after that. Smiling, Neptune lowered her hands to touch the pair that had wrapped around her waist and met in the middle, laughing to herself as she did. Noire certainly didn't _feel_ bothered by what she was touching... Not that she had before. If she could act like that after seeing Neptune MK2...

"Thanks, Noire. I _guess_ she doesn't look _that_ bad if that's how you feel about it... N-Not that that's why I care or anything! I just didn't want my gajillion fans to think I was getting fat is all!"

Noire snorted. _Now_ who was tsundere?

"You sure got over that fast. Now what are we supposed to do? This scene is pretty short as it is right now, isn't it?" Sighing, Noire shook her head. Leave it to Neptune to pull something like this — though she supposed it was really more _her_ fault that this game had to get its own segment, really... Despite her words and even her exasperated expression, however, rather than pull away or leave in a fit of annoyance, Noire actually pulled her wife into her lap to rest her head on top of Neptune's. "Well, I guess I can't complain too much. It means you're finally growing up a little. Remember how bad you were in the main story? 'Help! Help! For some insane reason I think the amazing and smart and wonderful CPU I'm married to that couldn't keep her hands off of me last night might not think I'm attractive!' Would I have done _any_ of that if I thought you were ugly? E-Especially when I... When I did _that_? Even if I was doing everything else because of how much I really loved you, even I have my limits. Seriously, Neptune... Use your head a little... Sheesh..."

Fighting back a grin at Noire's_ really really bad_ attempt to imitate her voice, not to mention her willingness to be so free with her feelings in front of her, Neptune decided to let Noire have her little (totally tsundere — yeah, she could see that earlier narration!) ramble and not comment, especially since _she_ could just as easily comment on how far _Noire_ had come too. She used to be just as flustery as IF was, but now look at her! Acting like Neptune was little more than a hug pillow meant purely for her benefit like this, talking about all kinds of raunchy things...

Noire had really started to let Neptune inside of her barrie... Waitwaitwait, that didn't sound good.

Noire had really started to open hersel... Nope, still bad.

Noire had really started to let Neptune past her defenses, hadn't she?

... Eh. Close enough.

It was kinda funny, now that Neptune thought about it. While getting in a relationship had made Neptune _more_ sensitive about a lot of things, it had helped _Noire_ become more _open_ about a lot of things instead. Were they balancing each other out or something? That was kind of nice. It was also kind of annoying too, but in a nice way.

Settling down into her wife's embrace, Neptune closed her eyes, waiting for the usual fade to black. She wasn't expecting any last minute punchlines considering their state of dress, and she wasn't really in the mood to get down and dirty either. This was nice as it was.

Unfortunately, Noire was not a mind reader, nor was she reading the narration. As she finished grumbling ("... using the camera to look up your skirt...") about how she most certainly _was_ attracted to Neptune and how Neptune had been fool to ever doubt it, she finally realized that Neptune actually seemed pretty content to be with her like this. Seeing that, she herself couldn't help but flush, realizing the humiliating thing she had just gotten finished doing all while Neptune had turned her into a nest.

Time for a convenient subject change.

"S-So... Now that that's settled... Neptune?"

"Huh? What is it?" Neptune didn't even bother to look up at Noire as she replied. She was way too cozy (in way too many ways) to care about anything else right now. She was sure whatever Noire had to say didn't require her moving anyway, and certainly not when they were undoubtedly heading for the scene changing any second now. Though if that were the case, maybe she should have pretended to be asleep...

Noire swallowed.

Was it too soon?

One way to find out.

"You wouldn't get mad if I asked you to... c-c-cosplay her once in a while, w-would y-"

"_Noire_!" Scratch that last thing. Looking up at Noire, who had thankfully pulled back just enough so she could look down at Neptune (had her chin still been where it had been, Neptune realized too late that she probably would have broken her nose...), Neptune frowned at her wife. "I _am_ her! The only important difference is the size!"

"What?! I-I was just _asking_!" Feeling like a total fool, but in a position where she couldn't do anything to escape Neptune's scrutinizing gaze, Noire could only blush furiously and try to defend her question now that she had gone and asked it. Worst of all, she might have totally undone her earlier actions. "S-Stop looking at me like that! That doesn't mean I like her more! I-I mean it! Stop! Stop or I'll.. I-I'll prove just how much I l-like you more!"

Neptune stared at her with narrow eyes, the hurt on her face plain as day.

And then she cracked a smile.

Why that _little_...

"Awww, come on Noire, I was _kidding_." Relaxing in Noire's arms once again, Neptune lowered her gaze once more, resuming her earlier comfortable position. Since Noire had opened the door to it... The CPU grinned. A little honesty from her end couldn't hurt things either, could it? After all — it _was_ "her" they talking about. "I mean, I think _I'd_ go out with her. Look at that butt!"

"H-Hold on a minute, who cares about _her_ butt, look at _your_ butt!"

"What _about_ my... Wait, did you just...? Why are _you_ getting like that over it? I get _me_ doing it, but..."

"S-Shut up! I'm going back to sleep!"

"'Kaaaay. By the way, I love you and your butt too."

"No one was asking!"


	15. Anniversary Stage 14

"What... _is_ this...? T-This is fake, right?"

The CPU Candidate of Lastation didn't know what she should think right now. She had been sent an e-mail... well, no, _everyone_ had been sent the e-mail. Uni would have pegged it as simple spam at first, but the fact that the subject line had her sister's name in it made her pause. If someone was sending spam about her sister, ohhhh, she wouldn't let them get away with it!

Rather than nasty comments or baseless flames or dirty stories about the sender and her sister — the usual sort of thing one might expect from spam e-mail directed at a CPU — what Uni found inside the e-mail was a simple set of links. Not a single picture and not a signature for Uni to attribute the e-mail to. It didn't even look like the same people were hosting the different links, so this was likely a gathering of... well, it was a gathering of _something_, that was for sure.

In other words? Nothing _too_ bad...

... _or_ something _so_ bad that it couldn't be contained in a simple e-mail!

With her sister's reputation potentially at stake, Uni knew she didn't have a choice in the matter. She made sure all of her anti-virus software was up to date and proceeded to open up the first link, prepared for the worst.

What did she find?

A page showing off the pictures Cave had taken earlier in the special (not that Uni knew anything about that). On the page, for the entire internet — meaning all of Gamindustri — to see was Noire prancing around and posing like some kind of... well, Uni wasn't actually sure what it was like, but between the dedication she was clearly showing and the odd clothes, it was quite obviously something that she had been working very hard at.

And given the clothes and poses, it was _obviously_ fake! Right? Why would her sister, her cool and awesome and _sophisticated_ sister, be hopping around her room and jumping on her bed and... and all of these things...? Uni didn't understand! The pictures didn't _look_ fake, and the comments weren't even questioning whether or not they were real! Why didn't anyone believe in her sister? What was Gamindustri coming to?

"Well, I'll just have to show _them_..." Cracking her knuckles, Uni began tapping away at her keyboard, determined to show these ignorant people online that her sister would never do something like this! That _other_ Noire might, but _her_ Noire was a respectable lady with only proper hobbies... Well... Maybe Noire _did_ have some... No no no! Her sister would definitely never put herself out on display like this! Definitely not! Nodding at her screen as she finished rereading her comment, Uni tapped the send button. "There. That should fix this."

Naturally, it did no such thing, and not two minutes later did Uni find herself responding to a slew of comments making fun of her defense of Noire and denial of the identity of the woman in the pictures.

"I-It is _not_ the most obvious thing in the world! It could be something totally different!"

"My butt isn't hurting! Why would they even _ask_ that?"

"W-W-What do they mean I sound like I think she's my 'wifey'...?! She's my _sister_...!"

"H-How could I... w-with her... I-I-I-I-I d-don't even _h-h-have_ a..."

With that last comment forever burned into her mind, Uni decided it was time to leave this page forever. As she shakily moved her mouse to close out of the page, her entire face a bright burning red, she found that she had a newfound respect for the parental controls Mina forced on the twins — she really wished she had had something like that on, but for some reason, Noire never seemed to want to push the subject...

Uni shook her head furiously as her mind began adding two and two together. Noire just didn't like censorship, that was all! She wanted her people to have the freedom of choice! T-That was all! Just like how Uni had _chosen _to stay on the page instead of leaving it, now she was _choosing_ to leave it! Noire, in all her brilliance, had left out things like that so that people could grow and learn from mistakes, yes, that must have been it!

Her faith in her sister now even stronger than it had been prior to seeing those obviously faked images, Uni found herself looking at that e-mail again. There were still two more links left to click. Did she want to risk it? It would probably be more of the same, but...

"Wait a sec... _My_ name is in the address for that one... But what's that 'x' between us for...? Ah, it couldn't be! They probably put pictures of me and Noire together to make it look like we're _fighting_! That's just playing dirty! Well I won't let them get away with it...!"

A few rooms over, having just seen the e-mail herself, Noire was in something of a panic. Not only had incredibly unflattering pictures of her been posted all over the internet and been sent to places and people she absolutely had _not_ wanted them sent, but _those_ fans were taking advantage of the "scandal" to send around all kinds of fan-made pictures in the midst of the real set's hubbub. With that real set in the mix, of course people were looking at everything, wanting to see even more, and naturally, this meant they'd find the things that _absolutely_ weren't real...

"I can't believe they sunk so low... This time, I'm not letting it slide! Anonydeath in the anime was one thing, but this is another... Luckily, I have a plan in place for this."

Just as Noire was about to call Blanc so she could ask if Felix Wrong was taking cases right now, the sudden sound of gunshots interrupted her train of thought.

What had just happened? And so close? That had been in the Basilicom!

Wasting no time, Noire whipped a blade out of her inventory, left her office, and was dashing down the hall towards the source of the noise. If she was right, then that had come from Uni's room, but... What could have caused that? Had Uni been attacked? Was this entire situation online an elaborate ruse to distract the CPU so that her sister could be left defenseless...?!

Just as Noire arrived at her destination and was about to open Uni's door, to her surprise, the door opened all on its own. There stood Uni, looking physically no worse for wear, apparently on the way out.

"O-Oh, hello Uni, I..." Noire quickly returned her weapon to where it belonged before Uni could question her on it. If she had jumped to a conclusion, well, that would just be embarrassing! Setting that aside, Noire decided the adult approach was in order. "Are you heading out?"

To Noire's surprise, Uni didn't even look at her — or maybe she couldn't — as she walked past her. Her only explanation for this peculiar behavior was the single sentence she spoke as she brushed past Noire, not even addressing the issue of the gunshots.

"I need to buy a new computer."

With that, Uni was gone.

Now while certain things went over Noire's head from time to time, the fact that Uni had randomly decided to get a new computer right after those pictures had gone viral... Probably wasn't a good sign. Especially considering the sounds that Noire had heard prior to meeting Uni just now. Swallowing, Noire peeked into Uni's room, though at this point she was fairly certain that she knew what she would find within.

And she was quite right.

"S-So... Uni saw _those_ pictures then, did she..."

It wasn't a difficult conclusion to reach after a glance into the room — for there, sitting on Uni's desk, was her laptop... or what remained of it, that is.

Closing her eyes, Noire slowly stepped away from the room, closing the door as she retreated into the hallway.

"Well... Better she react like that than decide she likes it, I suppose..."

Noire paused as she considered the fact that the e-mail would still likely be in Uni's inbox if she had chosen to close it out that way rather than by simply deleting it.

"Maybe I should ask Blanc about parental locks instead of a lawyer... Just to be safe."

They did say curiosity killed the dogoo, after all.


	16. Anniversary Stage 15

Kei looked down at the address she had been given, before looking up at the address on the apartment before her.

No doubt about it. This was the place.

It was a ridiculous notion that she had gotten in her head, she knew, but after her last failure with her fellow Oracles, perhaps extreme measures needed to be taken. After all, it wasn't as though she actually had any vested interest in this for her own sake — it was for Noire's sake, for Lastation's sake, for her relationship with both of those things' sakes, that she was trying to understand what it was like to love.

Therefore, seeking out the greatest remaining mage in Gamindustri in the hopes of obtaining a love potion (that she would then use on herself) seemed like a perfectly reasonable conclusion to reach... well, that, and Kei really didn't want to have to go through another scene like she had with Histoire. If it meant locking herself up in a room with a love potion so she could experience the effects and then be done with it, sinking to this level was fine with her.

Taking a deep breath, the Oracle decided she was ready — there was no turning back now. Steadying herself, prepared to face whatever kind of blasphemous person opened the door, she raised her hand and knocked.

"What the...?! I'll call you back... I think they've found me! Loochs tneve emag noitamina cisum."

The surprised cry of a woman from inside the apartment was the first thing Kei heard. The person sounded a lot younger than she had expected... and from the sound of it, was involved with things that Kei wanted nothing to do with. Perhaps she should call the authorities before she left? This person might be some kind of smuggler for all she knew... "Mage" indeed! What had she been thinking?

As the sounds of crashes and explosions followed what was likely approaching footsteps, Kei considered her options.

She had known this would be a ridiculous option from the onset, but the more she waited, the less it looked like a feasible ridiculous option — and quite frankly, she just wasn't in the mood for something that wasn't feasible right now.

This, in turn, meant that she had a choice, a choice that she had to make right this instant.

She could stay here and deal with whatever ridiculous shenanigans this "mage" had to offer, inevitably leading to the "I'm not a mage, my NAME is MAGES." punchline... or she could cut her losses and leave before she made a fool out of herself for two scenes in a row.

As it happened, Kei took the second option.

"Forgive me for keeping you, I had _urgent_ matters to... Hello?"

By the time MAGES. got around to opening her apartment's door, there was no one outside. The woman peered outside, looking both ways down the hall, but there wasn't a person in sight. Frowning, the blue haired mad scientist pulled out her cell phone and began dialing, suddenly looking rather upset.

"Hello? It's me. They got her. We should be very careful moving forward..."

And with that, MAGES. slammed the door behind her and returned to the depths of her lair.


	17. Anniversary Stage 16

"Aaah... I wish I could have another scene..."

Vert realized she was probably just pouting, but she couldn't help herself. Thanks to Leanbox's situation and Blanc being so _un_-cute with things as of late, she hadn't even in the mood to game as much in the main story, meaning she had a year's (or was it a month's? Noire and Neptune had confused her...) worth of games to catch up on all within this one single anniversary chapter! There was no way she would be able to pull something like that off...

If only it had been Nepgear that she was marrying. Even if Nepgear were avoiding her, at least she would be _cute_ about doing it. Actually, thinking on it... Now that she was free of the story's restraints, while she would most definitely prefer Nepgear, she wouldn't mind the alternatives if she could have her pick... Maybe an older Peashy, maybe Rom and Ram could do a fusion dance and become someone twice as cute as their grumpy older sister... Why, she would even be willing to entertain Compa or some of the other friendlier characters she so rarely got to interact with for a little too! How exotic that would simply be!

What's more, even for a super gamer like her, spending this chapter playing games instead of doing something fun like everyone else was just _wasn't_ fun! Maybe she could try to retcon herself in the spirit of the recently released remake and play with Iffy for a little while? Or see if she could get a Nepgear to appear in the same way the other Noire had Plutia?

"No, that wouldn't be very fun... I don't think Nepgear acting that way would be nearly as cute as her normal attitude either. My, that wouldn't be very original of me anyway, would it?" Realizing _that_ important fact made Vert sigh. She supposed that option was off the table completely then — heaven forbid she make it look as though she was taking ideas from _Noire_ of all people. That just wouldn't do at all. "I suppose I don't have a choice but to hope a scene meant for me comes along again..."

At that exact moment, just as Vert was about to dive back into her games, she heard a rapping noise — a knock at her door. Now who could that be? Now, of all times? ... Well, actually, she didn't really know what time it was, as such hadn't been established, but still! Was she about to get a scene after all? Simply marvelous!

You know, speaking of, she wouldn't mind Marvelous! or the other side characters either... There was nothing wrong with broadening one's horizons, after all... She was getting kind of excited!

Who would it be? Who would it be? There was only one way to know!

"Come in!"

In a delightful twist of fate, while she had just been concerned about copying Noire, the person at her door and now entering her room was none other than Noire's younger sister herself. What a treat!

"Hello, er, Vert...?" Looking rather unsure of herself (adorably so!) was none other than little Uni, entering Vert's room with a stack of papers held tightly in her arms. She seemed taken aback for a moment — perhaps such was expected, considering she hadn't been in Vert's room since the CPU had redecorated. There was so much new merchandise decorating it that Vert had just had to fill up another room or two! "I was supposed to give you this, but... Maybe I should go..."

"No no, Uni, please stay." Smiling brightly, Vert rose from her desk to welcome the CPU Candidate into her room. It was about time she got a scene that wasn't with her fellow CPUs! And if it couldn't be Nepgear, then sweet this little tsundere was a perfectly acceptable placeholder. "Why don't you have a seat? It's been much too long."

Uni tilted her head. She... hadn't expected this kind of reaction out of the CPU. At first, she felt wary about it, but as she considered Vert's position... while Uni had gotten to have scenes with Neptune, Kei, and her sister, plus Nepgear (sort of) that one time, Vert had been stuck with just Chika and Blanc for most of her big scenes. She hadn't even had much of a role in Part 1, whereas Uni had been around quite a bit in comparison. Uni had even gotten to see more people in the anniversary, hadn't she?

Maybe Vert was feeling lonely?

"Sure..." Figuring it couldn't hurt — after all, Vert _was_ usually pretty nice to her and the other Candidates, even if she was a bit _too_ nice to Nepgear for Uni's liking — Uni followed Vert over to a couch, keeping the stack of papers she had brought with her close. She couldn't forget to tell the CPU what she had come here to tell her! "I guess it _has_ been a while, huh?"

Uni had just been trying to follow the conversation, but Vert seemed to brighten almost instantly at the remark.

"Hasn't it? Would you like anything to eat? Oh, while you decide what you'd like, let me put some tea on..." Just as Uni had sat down, Vert was already hopping up and heading over to the one "normal" looking part of her room to start making some drinks for them. It would have made her feel bad about how she'd thought about Vert during her encounter with Blanc earlier in the special had she remembered it right now — thank goodness for a conveniently timed lack of continuity saving her from that potential guilt!

"I'm actually not that hungry, really." Uni knew it would be rude of her to refuse Vert's offer, and as much as she _would_ have liked to sit down for tea and snacks with Vert (if she really thought about it, she didn't goof off _too_ much like Neptune and she wasn't hard to read like her sister or Blanc — she could live with the... well, Vert-ness if it meant she could relax a little more), she didn't think it was right to take up that much more time when Vert was supposed to be...

"My, don't be silly, Uni. This is a special occasion! Who knows when, or even _if_, we'll get to share another scene together?" Vert's mood was better than it had been in ages. She wasn't even thinking "if it couldn't be Nepgear" anymore — the idea of pleasant, no-drama-attached (not to mention cute as a button, can't forget that!) company was simply too delightful to pass up. "At least have some cake. Oh, I have some cookies left from this morning, would you like some of those?"

Uni bit her lip. She really _did_ have an important message to give Vert, but...

Hesitantly, she peeked at the narration. While she was a bit bothered by the part about Nepgear, apparently Vert wasn't even thinking about that anymore, which meant... She was just genuinely pleased to see Uni? N-Not that Uni _really_ cared how Vert was lonely or how nice she could be o-or anything like that at all, she was just curious!

And... And...

W-W-Was she really... cute?

Uni swallowed.

That cinched it.

Curse her similarities to her sister kicking in at such a crucial time!

"I-If you _really_ insist, I guess... I can have a couple of cookies..." In a tried and true tsundere fashion, Uni crossed her arms, cheeks tinged with the slightest bit of pink, and glanced pointedly away from Vert. Under normal circumstances, this would have been the end of it, but being in Vert's room, that meant she had turned to look directly at a shelf of figures and the... _sparkling_ poster above it.

This left Uni no choice but to turn in the _other_ direction, her cheeks now flushed a significantly darker shade of red than they had been a moment prior. Having watched this scene play out from across the room, Vert couldn't help but smile, though for a moment, it faltered as she considered the likelihood of this ever happening again.

They wouldn't remember any of this in a little while, would they? The special was finally almost over, and then it would be back to doom and gloom and worrying about Leanbox and regretting things for her. Uni, well, she wasn't sure what Uni was up to these days, but surely it had to be better than what was happening on her end.

Still... That didn't mean they still couldn't do this sort of thing again, did it...?

Looking rather somber as she brought over a plate of cookies (with a bit of cake having been added just in case Uni changed her mind once she started eating), Vert sat down on the couch across from the Candidate and offered her a smile, though it clearly wasn't as bright a one as the one she had been wearing only a few moments prior — even Uni noticed, but rather than comment, at first she chose to simply take a cookie.

"Thanks. Down the hatch then...!" It was certainly good — cookies did tend to be — so Uni set her remaining reservations aside and continued nibbling at the sweets she had been presented with, a bit surprised that Vert had stopped talking to her. She realized she was probably looking like a chipmunk, sitting there holding a cookie and munching on it like that, and that was just _embarrassing_... With that in mind, Uni swallowed what she was chewing and set her unfinished cookie down on a napkin. "Is everything okay? You got quiet all of a sudden. I can go if I'm a bother."

Vert gasped lightly. Oh, what a terrible host she was being! She was making Uni feel unwelcome, when she was anything but!

"Not at all, Uni. I was just... thinking about things. It's a bit complicated, but I don't want to spoil this talking about serious things like that." Vert offered Uni a sad sort of smile, followed by a shrug. Between the idea of not getting to do this again and needing to go back to being so down... She would not mind at all if this scene could last another ten chapters just as long as this whole one had been. "You, though, have done nothing to bother me at all, so don't you worry about that one bit. I dare say you coming here is one of the best things that's happened to me since this story started."

"I-Is that so..." So much for trying to make some smalltalk. Blushing once more, Uni found herself reaching for the cookie she had abandoned just moments ago to resume the muching squirrel position.

Watching Uni nibble at her snack, Vert couldn't help but wonder... What would it be like when it was her and Blanc? What would it be like if she could really have wooed Nepgear? Or someone else entirely? Would it be awkward? Would it be frustrating? Or would it be pleasant... like this was?

She hoped it would be that last option.

Even if it wasn't, though... Maybe it would be possible to spend some time with Lastation's CPU Candidate on occasion anyway?

"Say... Uni? Might I ask you a question?"

"Huh!?" Having gotten so used to the silence, Uni nearly jumped off of the couch in surprise. Luckily she had just finished the cookie, else she might have tossed that up in the air, which would have been absolutely _awful_. Blinking a few times, hoping that reaction hadn't been too obvious, she looked to the blonde CPU across from her — the earnest look on her face took Uni off guard.

Was Vert sure that she wasn't being a bother...?

"Did I surprise you? That must have been good. You should try the cake too!" Apparently amused by Uni's reaction, but not having realized just why she had reacted that way, Vert leaned forward to push the plate of sweet delights towards the already flustered Candidate, unintentionally giving Uni the best seat in the house, so to speak.

The CPU Candidate tugged at her collar nervously, unsure of how to proceed. Looking away would make it obvious, but... was it okay to look...? Seriously...? What would Noire do right now?

_"I-It's not like I _like_ looking or anything!"_

Aaah! That didn't help at all! Why had she stayed up late watching her sister and Neptune's scenes last night?!

"Uni...?"

At least Vert was sitting up now... No wonder she was considered such a dangerous opponent... With how Neptune used to be, it was no wonder Nepgear liked to spend time with Vert...

Uni swallowed nervously. Since they had established the anime as a minor source for things, did that mean... If this kept up... Instead of Nepgear... _Was she_ going to be the one snuggled up to Vert's chest on her balcony...?!

"Ah, was it too dry? Do you need something to drink?"

This time, as Uni was finally pulled back to reality, the CPU Candidate did jump a little off of the couch. She had been so wrapped up in her thoughts (were they starting to turn into fantasies now?) that she had gotten fairly distracted. Flushing, this time out of embarrassment, Uni shook her head.

"N-No, no it's fine." Coughing into her hand, Uni decided her best option right now would be to try to return the subject to wherever Vert had been trying to take it while she figured out her best means of escape. "Sorry, I wasn't... W-Well, forget about that. What was it you wanted to ask me?"

"Well..." Vert pursed her lips. She wondered if this was a bad time... Certainly, it might be the only time she could ask such a question, but if they were going to be done with each other when the scene ended anyway, what did it matter what she did? Whether she asked or didn't asked... This whole anniversary affair... Now that she thought about it, much as she wanted to ask, it wasn't like either of them would be able to do anything about it, was it?

Was it all pointless? Had they been wasting everyone's time with this? Should she really have been feeling so happy to see Uni when it was in a context such as this?

"You should!" To the surprise of both CPU and even CPU Candidate, Uni stood from the couch, arms at her side, and cried out. She may have revealed that she had peeked into the narration again to see what Vert had been thinking, but she didn't particularly care at that moment. Why was Vert thinking such depressing things? "So what if it's pointless? W-We've been at this for a whole year! I'm really happy we're still here after a whole year! Nepgear is finally up too! T-That's all worth celebrating, isn't it? So maybe we took a little longer on this special than we meant to, so what? T-That's not so bad! It was nice, wasn't it?! And maybe we will get to hang out some more in the main story...! M-M-Maybe you and I will both get so sick of the d-drama part that we'll decide to go e-e-e-elo-elop...hant shopping together! F-For an elephant! For fun!"

Vert seemed taken aback by Uni's outburst, which might have been something if not for the fact that Uni herself, face as red as the reddest part of CFW Brave's armor, was even _more_ stunned that she had managed to get all of that out. Perhaps that had been the straw that had broken the figurative camel's back — or, in this case, the figurative elephant's back?

"A-Anyway, I came here to let you know that you have a scene coming up. S-So... Bye!"

And just like that, Uni dashed out of the room like a black blur, the papers she had left behind now the only remaining evidence that she had been there at all.

Blinking a few times, still thoroughly surprised over what she had just witnessed from the CPU Candidate... But looking back on it, such behavior wasn't that unheard of for her. Building up stress, letting it all out in one burst... That was certainly a rather "Uni" thing to do. A very cute thing too. The poor thing was probably curled up somewhere and berating herself for being so embarrassing, when, most of all, she had been quite right.

This was a celebration! This was for fun! This was a happy occasion! Neptune and Noire's story — _their_ story, _all_ of their story, had been going strong for such an amazing length of time! It might have seemed small to some, but it was still such grand news that it most definitely was worth celebrating!

"I suppose I should count my blessings that the one who came to deliver that message was so sweet. I do hope our next encounter can be as... tasty as this one was. Is that a little unrealistic of me...? Well, one can certainly hope, at least, now can't they, Vert?" Feeling especially cheerful now, Vert rose from her seat and headed over to her computer to see if she could get in a quick game before the scene ended.

She wasn't quite sure how she felt about all of this, whether she wanted to eat Uni up or squish her and try to adopt her from under Noire's nose, but either way...

"I will most certainly be seeing her again. Of that much, fourth wall or not, I can promise."


	18. Anniversary Stage 17

Letting out a rather loud yawn, the CPU of Lowee leaned back in her seat and stretched out her arms behind her, filled with nothing but satisfied feelings. She had been working for hours upon hours on this project today, and beyond today she had in fact had been at this for almost a month off and on, and now... She had finally decided to share it. Some might have thought that offering it in slow samples would be the better way to go about it, but she just couldn't resist.

Eyes almost sparkling, the petite brunette returned to her sitting position and began clicking away until she found herself looking at the fiction website's front page. She still couldn't believe it, but there it was. It had been a wild ride, and it was far from over for her, but now had been a good a time as any.

Now the whole world could see what she had created.

_A Much Better Proposal by Hammer of Superiority _  
><em>Summary: Planeptune is on its last limbs. Shares are at an all time low, Neptune has run herself ragged trying to support what's left of her country, and Nepgear is probably there too, but you don't care and neither do I. Fearing the demise of their nation imminent, Histoire summons Gamindustri's greatest CPU to request that she save Planeptune, using the only means left: Blanc... must marry Neptune. Rated for extreme violence and graphic sexual content. REVIEW OR ELSE!<em>  
><em>Real Person Fiction — Rated: Adult — Neponese — DramaHumor — Chapters: 18 — Words: A lot — Reviews: 0 — Favs: 0 — Follows: 0 — Updated: 1 min ago — Published: 5 min ago — [Blanc/White Heart, Neptune/Purple Heart] [Vert/Green Heart, A Really Big Truck Rigged With Explosives]_

Blanc smiled proudly to herself as she looked at her newly published story. There was no way this wouldn't become a hit. She had outdone herself this time. If it were an original work, she could probably get this published. She could probably have even gotten a movie deal out of it!

She didn't want any of that though, because this wasn't supposed to be anything like that. What this was was something much...

"'I'll do it.' Vert, Noire, and Histoire all stopped in their tracks, which wasn't very hard because they were so slow. Vert had been in the process of being absorbed by her massive boobs, like always, Noire had been whining about it not being like she really wanted to do things that she _really_ wanted to do, and Histoire was on her hands and knees before the two of them, pleading for them to stop arguing in the face of the great White Heart. They looked to the source of the voice: Blanc. Her eyes were sharp and only determination could be seen on her perfect features. 'Of course I'll do it. Of course I'll marry Neptune.'"

The CPU's reaction was instant. Not a second after hearing the voice of the intruder, she stood up in her seat, a moment away from transforming. She spun around to try to find the source of the voice, glaring at the newcomer despite the fact that she had recognized their voice from the first word. Her cheeks were already becoming stained with a furious, embarrassed red — she had not written it like that! She was not _that_ self-serving, dammit!

"Vert, put that phone down and stop acting like you're reading what is actually written in my story before I rip your head off." Blanc's words were spoken evenly, and she was doing her best to keep calm, but the fact was that she was positively humiliated — and of all people, it had to be Vert that was the one to not only find what she had done, but _call her on it_! "I know what I wrote and I know damn well you're making it look worse than it is."

The blonde CPU standing in the doorway to Blanc's room laughed sweetly — _too_ sweetly.

"My, I'm surprised to hear that from you, Blanc..." In that moment, something dangerous flashed in Vert's eyes. For a moment, just a moment, Blanc seriously considered transforming — but she didn't want to risk harming her computer when there was still so much data on it! "This coming from the _sweetheart_ who has me paired with a truck. Not even a dashing and handsome alien truck that can transform into a robot with an _unquestionably_ attractive voice actor and an even _more_ attractive voice, no, you have me paired with a _truck_ that is set to _explode_, Blanc."

Blanc opened her mouth to respond, but given the look that Vert was giving her, she chose to divert her gaze.

While Vert had certainly been... _accentuating_ certain things about what she had written when she had been quoting it earlier, Blanc had indeed put Vert together with such a truck. I-It was her right to do that as the author, okay?!

"If I keep reading, will the inevitable _explosion_ at least be attractive?" Vert shook her head at the snort Blanc offered in response, choosing to instead enter Blanc's room (offering noises of what must be... well, Blanc wasn't sure, but they had to be reactions to what she was seeing in her room — just who did this bimbo think she was?!) and find a comfortable seat on the smaller CPU's bed. "Did you really think no one would see this?"

Surprisingly, Blanc just shrugged.

"Like I care. I just wanted to start getting that out. It felt good- It _feels_ good to be able to do that." Seeing that Vert was going to be playing it nice, at least for the moment, Blanc returned to her seat and let out a sigh. It really had helped. "Shouldn't you be able to relate to that? You decorate your whole damn Basilicom with all kinds of dumb stuff. So I'm decorating a little, _tiny_ corner of the internet with what I wish had happened if I hadn't been so stupid. What's wrong with that?"

"My, when you put it like that, not much..." It almost looked like Vert was actually going to be reasonable about this. Then she raised her eyebrow. "Only just the part where you have me paired with a moving explosive, that's all. Was that really necessary? I doubt you _really_ want that to happen... Do you? Do you really 'wish' that on me, Blanc?"

"That's... It's an artistic choice! It's for the story, that's all..."

Despite the implications, Vert couldn't help but laugh.

"Oh? Taking one of the world's leaders and blowing her up is an 'artistic choice,' is it? Are you sure it's not something else? Maybe you're just taking out your frustrations regarding our situation on me because I was the one who noticed it and brought it up to you. Could that be it, perhaps?" Eyes twinkling throughout her entire assessment of the smaller CPU, Vert didn't choose to gloat in the fact that she was right. Instead, she laid back on the bed and sighed. "I do hope you hurry up and get over that, or I might have to set my eyes elsewhere. You really can't keep a lady waiting forever, you know, especially when we're in the situation that we are."

Blanc rolled her eyes, reaching into her desk for an eraser to throw at Vert, granting her a light "ouch!" from the blonde as she sat up to rub her forehead. Smirking at the bullseye she had gotten, Blanc acted like nothing had happened while Vert began looking around the bed in vain for what had hit her. The eraser had already bounced off and onto the floor.

"Come on Vert, we both know your eyes were elsewhere even before you called me up." Really, who did this broad think she was? She had just had a scene where she had been eye humping _Noire's sister_ the whole time for crying out loud! Well... That wasn't technically completely true, but it was true enough in Blanc's mind!

"But I still called you." It was lucky for Blanc that Vert had rolled over and was now on all fours searching for what had hit her when Vert oh so bluntly had pointed that fact out. Blanc actually felt rather stumped, stupefied even, by that fact being pointed out so simply, and she felt at a loss for words. "Blanc, I think your ceiling might be in need of a repair, because I could have _sworn_ part of it just fell off and... Blanc? Why have you gotten so quiet all of a sudden?"

"I'm recording you shaking that fat ass of yours around so I can post it on the internet!" Blanc barked back a quick response now that Vert had brought her out of her surprise, but naturally she had been doing no such thing. As Vert cried out in surprise and began quickly began to try to look as proper as possible, Blanc collected her thoughts — perhaps so she could stuff them away in a box to forget about, or perhaps so she could really deal with them.

It was obvious, after all, wasn't it?

The situation that Leanbox and Lowee were in was not (currently) so dire that immediate action had been necessary — Vert had known that. That had meant that that meant preemptive action would have been all the better, because they had a lot more time than Histoire had had when she had called the two of them and Noire together to ask for help. It was why _her_ fucking around and avoiding Vert still had yet to cause any real damage — because they still had time.

But it also meant Vert still had all the time in the world to wait.

... Okay, maybe not "all the time in the world," but she still wasn't in a rush either. Her shares were still a heck of a lot better than Neptune's had been when it had hit the fan, at least relatively speaking anyway. Sure, they were still dropping slowly but surely, but the pace right now was enough that Vert wouldn't be in life threatening danger if she put it off for another month or two.

But she hadn't. She had seen it all and come to Blanc, because she had known Blanc was in that situation too. She had chosen to forgo what she could have done for herself to...

Blanc shook her head. So _maybe_ Vert had maybe done something a _little_ nice. That still didn't make what she was suggesting okay. And she didn't have to be such a cocky bitch about it either, which was all the more reason why she had to find an alternative that would make it so they definitely didn't have to get hitched. There was no way she would ever let herself be stuck with Vert of all people. Not a chance in hell.

Besides... It'd mean that one day, she and Vert would probably have to... to...

Ugh! She couldn't even _think_ about it! Do not want, do _not_ want!

"Delete that this instant, Blanc!" Having finally made herself look presentable, Vert turned to the other CPU and stared at her, as though she was demanding her to make a "good" video in place of the one Blanc had(n't actually) been taking earlier. "If you _really_ want to film me, I'm sure we can think of something that will entertain viewers much more than something like _that_."

Considering what she had just been thinking only moments prior, Blanc's first thought was naturally one that would require gratuitous amounts of censoring were it to be described in any manner of detail here. Thankfully, looking at Vert, she was able to deduce that the CPU's intentions were absolutely nothing like the evil, sadistic succubus version of Vert that existed in her mind ("Note to self: Write that into a new story." -Blanc), and was able to cool herself down before she snapped.

"The only thing _anyone_ would want to see _you_ doing is the kind of thing that would get me banned if I posted it anywhere." Even if _Vert_ hadn't meant it like that, though, that didn't mean Blanc couldn't taunt Vert in such a manner about the idea, smirking all the while. The way Vert actually looked upset by the idea both made it totally worth it... and a little disturbing to think that only she had been the one to "go there."

"_Blanc_...! My goodness, I simply meant something along the lines of a 'Vert Plays', and by the way, I'll have you know plenty of people out there would most definitely enjoy watching something like that." Crossing her arms defiantly, Vert shifted on Blanc's bed and raised one leg to let it dangle over the other, looking away with her eyes closed as though she was... looking down on Blanc! The nerve of that- "In any case, I do not want to hear that sort of thing from little miss 'extreme violence and graphic sexual content' over there."

Blanc choked.

She had _really_ hoped she could have gotten out of this scene without Vert bringing that up.

Time for a diversion.

"Fine, you want me to change it? That's what this is about, right?" If it meant Vert would stop pestering her about this, or at least stop before she started quoting Blanc's purple prose, sacrificing her artistic vision would be a small price to pay. She could always post the "original" version with Vert and the unquestionably unattractive truck later anyway. "You don't want to explode anymore, fine. Can we drop this crap already?"

Like she had just been offered the first spot in line at a new game release, Vert had uncrossed and recrossed her legs and was now beaming at Blanc with an expression that made her wonder if the blonde was just a little broken in the head. It wouldn't surprise her any, that was for sure. Unfortunately, given how genuine that smile on her face seemed to be, Blanc almost had to wonder if Vert actually _hadn't_ been...

"Oh! Well, I was really just teasing you, you should know I wouldn't ever ask you to _really_ change any of your stories, that just wouldn't be right for _anyone_ to do. Since you're offering, though... That _does_ sound like a delightful idea, doesn't it? That's very kind of you, Blanc."

Blanc swore internally at this revelation (she _knew_ Vert just liked to mess with people when there wasn't always meaning behind it too! she was kind of like Neptune like that... how could she have forgotten?), but it was too late to back out of it now. Vert was looking so... _happy_ about the whole thing now that Blanc probably would have felt bad if she turned the bimbo away — even if that would have been Vert's fault, as most things that went wrong in Blanc's life these days tended to be.

"Then get your ass over here so we can 'fix' it already."

As she said this, Blanc shifted her seat over in an attempt to make room next to her before sitting back in it, looking at her poor, pre-Vert word document, quickly making a quick backup as Vert made her way across the room. Speaking of, rather than politely stand in the space Blanc had made for the CPU at her side, Vert came up _behind_ her, of course pressing those gazongas against her back because what the hell else could she do with sacks of useless fat like those?

"Now if we're going to fix this up, the first thing we have to do is deal with that... thing you had me paired with. You already posted the story with it in there, so we can't just up and ignore it, now can we?" To Blanc's surprise, perhaps in part because she had a pair of fairly distracting... _distractions_ pressed against her, Vert actually seemed to be taking the situation somewhat seriously. Who knew she had it in her? "Oh, but that's still not a problem. If we put our heads together, I'm sure that there will be an easy way to make this work out just fine without coming off as strange or upsetting to the... My, does the truck even _have_ fans? If it was a choice for a character to put on the summary, I suppose it must, but I can't imagine who would want... Well, no matter. Has the truck exploded yet?"

Blanc just blinked, managing an "uhhhh..." before she began moving to open up the most recent "moment" between Vert and the truck so the other CPU could see for herself.

It wasn't that she was speechless or anything, it was just... the fact that Vert even seemed to _care_ about her story being consistent, even in regards to the whole "Vert plus bomb on wheels" part, actually, _especially_ in regards to that part, was pretty damn surprising to her. After all the teasing Vert had just put her through, Blanc would have sooner thought Vert would have told her to scrap the thing and start over rather than work with what Blanc had already done.

"Here it is. Right now, you're..." Blanc trailed off, gritting her teeth as she felt those... those _meat sacks_ pressing up even more against her than they had been before as Vert leaned forward to read. Still... She _was_ reading it, which was another surprising thing in and of itself. Though that didn't mean that Blanc was out of the woods just yet, and she certainly would love to get the hell out of this pillow factory. "Do you want a chair or something?"

"Hm...? Oh my, no, I'm fine like this. Isn't it easier for you to type when you have all the room there?" Vert's response was given in an absentminded sort of way, as she was still in the process of reading the dramatic scene where she found herself strapped to the back of the truck. Blanc might have found the response considerate if not for the fact that Vert was actually making things far more difficult by doing what she was now. "This... definitely is something, that's for sure! I do think this _is_ salvageable though. I was worried I would be inexplicably professing my love to it already, but I see you're waiting for me to... 'bond' with it first before I become willing to explode along with it when it crashes into Lastation's Basilicom. My my, you certainly do have this all planned out, don't you?"

"You're... surprisingly adaptable." Blanc couldn't deny it this time. She was _sure_ Vert would be about to throw a tantrum now that she had actually read some of it (she sure as hell probably would have), but the CPU was still acting surprisingly calm over the whole damn thing. Sure, it was just some shitty finfaction that Blanc had written that was mostly about herself and Neptune, but...

"I didn't say I _liked_ it, just that I can _fix_ it." Blanc wasn't sure if she liked Vert's tone, but it was still better than the alternative she had been expecting. "Let's just introduce some new character for me, maybe Nepgear or Uni or even IF or Chika, whoever makes the most sense with what you already have, and have them save me from that horrible truck. Oh, if it's already heading to Lastation's Basilicom, Noire saving me would work, yes? You can say I was brainwashed and you had that _other_ 'pairing' in the plot summary to keep your readers guessing. My, that doesn't sound bad at all, now does it? We could even have a double wedding!"

Rolling her eyes at the idea — though at least it was better than _her_ marrying Vert — Blanc began tapping away at her keyboard.

They stayed like that for a surprisingly decent amount of time. Blanc was genuinely surprised at how... civil the whole thing went. At times it had almost been, and she did mean _almost_ here... Fun...?

Sure, Vert never had managed to pull together the decency to move her jumbo jugs, but eventually Blanc got used to it.

At long last, as Blanc closed out of the newly finished outline of the "updated" version of her story, the two CPUs remained silent. Vert felt pleased with herself, clearly, but... Blanc just couldn't let things end like this — not when there was a question that was festering inside of Blanc like it was some kind of... well, she had used up all of her classy descriptions for her story, so right now all she could think of was that it was festering inside her like something was literally under her skin trying to break out, and dammit, she had to know!

Even if it meant a night of regrets afterwards, she had to know before the scene ended...!

"Hey. Vert."

"Hmmm? What is it?"

"Would you _seriously_ be okay with being paired with a freaking transforming truck if you liked how it looked? I mean... It's a truck! A truck!"

"Oh tut tut, Blanc. If it's 2D, anything is possible. _Anything_. That's the magic of it all. Imagine how romantic it would be, teaching an alien hero like that about a woman's touch... Doesn't that sound lovely?"

"You... You really scare me sometimes, you know that?"

"Heehee."

"Don't 'heehee' me! That wasn't a compliment!"


	19. Anniversary Stage 18

Tappa tappa tap tap. Tappa tap tap tappa tap tap tap. Tappa tappa tappa tap tap tap tappa.

The sound of fingers furiously typing away at computer keys was the only sound that could be heard as the door to the forbidden room slowly opened.

"_Again?_"

As she entered Neptune's "office," which was seemingly less and less like an "office" and more and more like a "use the anniversary chapter to screw around room," Noire shook her head. Every time she had been in a scene so far where Neptune was using a computer, only trouble had followed. Had another new game been announced? Had Neptune found the pictures Cave had taken of her — or worse, Blanc's story? Weren't these scenes not supposed to be connected to each other? Sighing, the black haired CPU decided she might as well get it over with and headed on over to her wife.

"Okay, Neptune, what have you found _this_ time? Did they announce a new sequel, maybe?"

As Noire continued her approach, Neptune slowly turned from her desk to face the other CPU, a wide... _guilty_ smile spreading across her lips. Noire already knew she wasn't going to like where this was going, but now that she had gotten the ball rolling, she didn't have a choice. She'd have to see this madness out to the end — and probably fix it too, more than likely.

"I did a bad, _bad_ thing, Noire."

An admission right from the start? One that, unlike the one from that big old fight of theirs in the last chapters of Part 2, couldn't be misunderstood in any way at all? Now _that_ got Noire's attention. Eyes narrowing, Noire approached her wife with such speed that it was a surprise she hadn't transformed into some kind of super speedy superhero to pull off such a quick maneuver.

"Neptune, if it was _you_ who was sending those e-mails earlier, you'll be finding yourself on the couch faster than..." On the bright side, it looked like Neptune seemed to be somewhat clueless as to what Noire was referring to here, so she could feel a little relieved about that. Though realistically, she doubted even Neptune could be particularly happy about the content of those e-mails, now that she remembered what had been in them. "N-Never mind. Forget I said anything and don't go looking at the last few scenes like you were earlier. So what is it that you did?"

Noire knew that Neptune was already making a mental note to do the exact thing that Noire had explicitly just told her _not_ to do, and while this normally might have been concerning, Noire also knew, and could take a little bit of smug satisfaction in the fact, that the anniversary special was finally almost over. That meant that there was no way Neptune could sneak in another chance to look over what had progressed thus far — especially since reusing a joke like that would be _so_ passe.

Deciding that she wouldn't give Neptune a chance to railroad her into talking about those earlier scenes herself, Noire crossed her arms and put on her most defiant face of the chapter — after all, jokes aside, if Neptune did something bad, Noire needed to know, didn't she? Darn right she did! So that meant that Neptune was going to talk whether she liked it or not.

Judging by that smile, though... Despite it apparently being a "bad, _bad_ thing," she didn't seem too ashamed about whatever it was.

Still smiling, Neptune motioned to the computer she had been typing on. Now that Noire looked at it... It wasn't Neptune's. It wasn't one she had ever seen before at all, actually. Maybe she _had_ seen the e-mails earlier and had a reaction similar to the one Uni had had? That would _almost_ be kind of sweet... Even if it meant Neptune had seen those things in the first place, which meant Noire had no choice but to force amnesia on her so that she could never speak of them or even think of them ever again.

Alas, if only it had been that simple.

"I stole the computer that our story is being written on. Our entire universe exists right _here_, on _this_ computer. I could look up all the spoilers for the story or be super duper morbid and end everything right now if I-"

"You _what_!?" Noire looked from the computer to Neptune and back and forth again a few times for good measure. The expression on Neptune's face said it all — this was legit. "How could you do something so reckless...?!"

Looking fearful, Noire began frantically looking around the room for sources of danger, as if she was afraid that she would get struck down by some sort of higher power at a moment's notice. However, it was Neptune who was struck by something in this moment — with inspiration, that is. As Noire continued to look around the room, as if she expected that book to come to life and assault her at any moment or that chair to decide she looked good enough to eat, Neptune began typing away at the computer again.

"Neptune, now is _not_ the time to be messing around!" Noire cried out indignantly. With Neptune not paying any attention to her, she knew that drastic times called for drastic measures. Luckily, she had come in here with _this_ sort of activity in mind anyway — so without further delay, she grabbed the sides of Neptune's chair and shifted it around so that Neptune was looking at her and her alone, before she grabbed her dress and ripped it open to allow Neptune full access. "Now is the time for _this_!"

Strangely enough, Neptune didn't look surprised that Noire was staring at her with such a ravenous expression, undergarments exposed and looking as though she was ready to pounce at a moment's notice. In fact, Neptune looked pretty pleased about the whole thing. In fact... She looked like she had been _expecting_ that to happen.

In fact... In fact... If anything, _Noire_ was the one who was starting to feel more and more surprised, because... She hadn't come in here for that reason at all, had she...? As her cheeks began to turn a lovely shade of pink, Noire stumbled backwards and tried in vain to close her torn top — where had this lingerie underneath come from!? she hadn't been wearing anything like that a few minutes ago! — when she caught a glimpse of the text on the computer screen.

_Even though Noire wanted her honey's attention sooooo much, Neptune (aka Sexy Heart) was hard at work on the computer like a good little muffin. As Noire looked around alllll over the place to find something to catch her Neptuney-Pie's attention, she found that nothing would fit the bill! Good thing she _always_ had _just_ the things on her that would do the trick._

_"Neptune, now is _not_ the time to be messing around!" Noire cried out indignantly, her voice dripping with innuendo and honey mustard. With Neptune not paying any attention to her sexy self, she knew that drastic times called for drastic measures. Luckily, she had come in here with sexy time in mind anyway — so without further delay, she grabbed the sides of Neptune's chair and shifted it around so that Neptune was looking at her and her alone, before she grabbed her dress and ripped it open to allow Neptune full access to the goods. "Now is the time for _this_!"_

"Okay, so before you get mad, I also wrote that you usually leave a change of clothes in the cabinet over there for when you can't control yourself and feel like jumping me when I'm hard at-"

"I can't believe you, Neptune!" Covering herself, Noire finally settled on glaring at her wife — abusing the power of the... well... god-computer like that! This was even worse than the stunt her other self had pulled with Plutia! At least that had been an accident and mostly outside of her control — Neptune could have done so much good here, and instead she just wanted a peep show? What happened to all that "stuff you get in real life" junk from the scene they had been looking at the new games? "And why did you use honey _mustard_ instead of just regular old honey?! What kind of voice drips with _that_?"

"W-Well I'm hungry! And I already used honey!" Of all the things for Neptune to get defensive about, Noire should have expected that it would have been her choice in food descriptors rather than what she had done to her. At least this exchange meant that she had probably escaped whatever trap Neptune had laid out for her in the "story" that she had written and had full control of herself again... Thank goodness.

Though... hold on. If Neptune was so hungry...

"Why didn't you write yourself a burger or something then?" Noire gave Neptune a scrutinizing look as she watched her wife's gears turn. Had Noire flashing her a little been a more logical and interesting way to see how much power that computer had over their world than solving a more realistic problem like sating her hunger? Seriously, Neptune!

"That's... a _really_ good idea, actually." Truth be told, the idea that she might be able to create things like that hadn't even remotely occurred to Neptune at all, but considering she'd totally changed Noire's mood (and her underwear)... That definitely made sense as a possibility, looking back on it. She smiled brightly at her wife, hoping she could smooth this over by "cooking up" some of their favorites. "Wow, Noire, you're a genius! Want something too?"

Noire rolled her eyes. Neptune could be a little _too_ obvious sometimes... N-Not that that was always a bad thing.

"Sucking up isn't going to do you any good now." Even with her words, Noire was starting to smile again. It was hard not to when Neptune got her going like this — and she didn't mean through crazy computer brainwashing either. "I'll give you five points for at least considering it, but let's just say you don't want to know out of how many that is."

The purple haired girl sighed woefully.

"Awww shucks." Grinning sheepishly, Neptune began scooting her chair back to its proper position, as it was still facing Noire, before she turned back to the computer, getting ready to make them the feast of a lifetime. The only problem was... "Um... Wowzers, I don't think I've ever had this kinda power before! Noire, what should I get? I've never been able to order off a menu that had _everything_ before!"

"It's not a _restaurant_, Neptune!" Noire was this close to slapping herself on the forehead, but she knew that too would elicit some kind of tease from Neptune, and why do that when she was supposed to be the productive one in the relationship? R-Recent events nonwithstanding, that is. "Just move over. You'll probably write yourself something that tastes terrible without even realizing it. At least I know what I'm doing."

"Really?" Neptune blinked a few times, before slowly rising from her seat and gesturing for Noire to sit, a wide smile on her face. The idea of a super meal like this "made" by Noire was even more enticing than it being "made" by her! "That's awfully swell of you. I hereby upvote this comment and will grant you access to the super computer so that you can write us up some lunch!"

"Yeah, yeah..." Sighing, Noire shook her head as she ran a hand through her hair and settled into the seat. She _still_ hadn't gotten to change how of the clothes _Neptune_ had torn up (because _she_ sure wasn't taking the blame for that), and now she was "making" Neptune a meal? Somehow, this didn't seem like it was very fair. "Go sit down over there or something and give me a minute to figure this out. We'll probably only get to do this once, so I want to make it count... unlike _some_ people."

Making sure to look directly at Neptune as she said that last part, Noire turned to the computer screen and cracked her knuckles while Neptune retreated into the back of the room to find something to mess with while she waited. Looking at the document, it seemed simple enough — hard to believe it had had the power to make Noire do what she had done earlier. Did she really just need to type on this and things would happen? Was it that easy?

"I guess a test is in order..." Noire shot a glance over her shoulder at Neptune. The other CPU had already found a game to amuse herself with and was quickly becoming absorbed in the opening cinematic. Good. That meant doing this wouldn't be _too_ embarrassing. "Okay, here we go..."

_As Noire sat down to type on the computer, she remembered that she had had a spare set of clothes in her inventory all along, meaning there was no need for her to go through the motions of changing the old fashioned way. The CPU let out a sigh of relief as she simply selected the item in question from the rest and found herself wearing a perfect set of clothes once again, without rips or tears or any unsightly lingerie best left for special occasions_ only _to speak of._

Not a moment after finishing the final sentence, as if it were the most natural thing in the world, Noire found herself being possessed by some kind of... force — no, not even that. Like she had decided to do everything that she had just written on her own all along, she opened up her inventory and switched her torn set of clothes for the fresh one that she had just "created" through the computer. In no time at all, Noire's outfit was back to normal, as was she once the "scene" that she had just written ended.

Needless to say, the CPU was pretty impressed. To think that Neptune had wasted such power on something so... trivial! There was so much the two of them could do with something like this, so much more than just making food appear or getting each other to do silly, nonsensical things like Neptune had!

_But_... Since Neptune _had_ done something like that...

"Turnabout is fair play, right?" Noire commented quietly to herself, shooting a quick look behind her to make sure Neptune wasn't watching. Luckily for her, Neptune had gotten past her selected game's opening sequence and was already playing from wherever she had left off previously — in other words, until Noire presented the food or some other pressing matter came along, Neptune was dead to the world. "W-Well... Here goes nothing."

Noire took a deep breath. She _could_ just forget about this and just make Neptune her food, then take the computer and go do all the amazing things she just _knew_ she could with it... Really, there was no reason to do something so _petty_ and _silly_, was there? It would just be childish to do something like that. And wouldn't it mean Noire was sinking to Neptune's level? It would, wouldn't it? There were so many better things she could do, like creating world peace, solving the share problem, or...

"It's so _hot_... Better take this off... There we go...! All better!" The sound of Neptune's voice from behind her made Noire swallow... and also realize that despite her conflicting thoughts on the subject, she had already gone and typed out a few paragraphs of what she _really_ wanted to do with that power. T-This was just a test, that was all! She had to see how far it went, that was all this was!

... Well... No sense in ending the scene when it was only halfway over. Right?

"R-Right..." Swallowing once more — and fighting back the urge to turn around and see how things were progressing — Noire dove right back into the keyboard. If her observations were correct, Neptune would still feel like all of what she was doing was perfectly natural, and her indignation — if she even would _have_ any — wouldn't even kick in until Noire was done with her, which seemed pretty fair to her considering that Neptune had pulled the same stunt with her just a little while ago. "Okay... Maybe not the _exact_ same stunt, but who's keeping score?"

It wasn't like Noire "keeping score" was what had gotten her typing this in the first place or anything.

Soon, Noire found that her fingers were flying from key to key, her imagination running wild. At some point, her own outfit had transformed into that of a fantastic, over the top version of the traditional chef outfit, complete an abnormally tall toque, flashy jacket, stunning pants; the works. She did her best to ignore the sounds coming from behind her, because she knew that if she looked, she'd either feel bad or feel something... else, but either way, it would mean she wouldn't get to finish typing, and _that_ would probably end in nothing but disaster.

"And here... we... go...!" As the final sentence flowed from her fingertips to the screen before her, Noire knew that there was no turning back now. Neptune had played a mean trick on her, so now — in addition to her lunch — she was going to get a nice helping of payback to boot. Exhaling (that had been a lot more work than she thought it would have been!), Noire leaned back in her seat. She had purposely not included herself in what she had written, meaning she basically had free reign over her own actions... though the same wasn't exactly the case for Neptune.

"Wow Noire... This looks _great_. Why don't you come and join me? I'll even let you have the first taste." There was Neptune, right on time. From the huskier, sultry tone of voice she was using, not to mention the exact words, even the pauses... Noire's "plot" had definitely taken effect. She couldn't believe her ears!

Standing up to face the music, Noire wondered if now it was _she_ who was reusing material — her other self's material no less! Nothing she could do about it now, though... At least, unlike her other self, she was more than prepared for what she was about to find when she turned around — after all, it was only happening because she had described it in detail. This wasn't anything like what her other self had gone through, because she was _prepared_. She had even left appropriate "blank" moments for herself to react and for Neptune to have proper reactions without breaking the scene. She had written this in such a way that no matter what she did, Neptune would react just perfectly. She had thought over everythi...

"W-W-W-W-What are you _doing_?!"

... On the other hand, as the saying goes, seeing is believing, and despite everything that had happened to this point, seeing a fruit-snack-bikini-clad Neptune on top of a table "dressing" herself in whipped dream and fixings was an entirely different experience compared to writing about it.

"I'm making you your lunch, obviously. Oh, I guess I'm gonna be more like your dessert here, huh?" Acting as though this was the most obvious thing in the world, Neptune laughed at Noire's confusion and her own joke as she continued "dressing" herself with all sorts of sweet food stuffs — and boy was Noire thankful she had included that bikini, edible as it may have been. "Now are you going to eat me or what?"

Sure that she was going to have a stereotypical nosebleed any second now considering how much blood had rushed to her face, Noire found herself torn. All in all, once she got to return to normal, Neptune's biggest complaint about this would probably just be that she hadn't gotten to eat any of the "food" (and actual food) herself. On the other hand... On the other hand...!

"I-I-I'm sorry! I'm so sorry! I'm not ready after all!" Shaking her head so fast and furiously that her twintails began to whip up a storm, Noire rushed back to the computer and tried to type away what was going on behind her — but to no avail. She still had to reach that point, after all! Nothing new she wrote now wouldn't take effect until after her own clothes spontaneously turned into sprinkles! Why had she chosen _now_ to be so creative? "What do I do, what do I do, what do I do..."

Neptune, being Neptune as well as the helpful tool of Noire's handiwork, was more than happy to offer a suggestion.

"You get over here and put this chocolate sauce to good use, that's what."

Noire gulped, squeezing her eyes shut and shaking her head some more. She wasn't ready for that! And she wasn't ready for the kind of power this computer held! Even using it for good was too much! If only there was a way to get rid of all of this and make it as though it had never happened...

"Of course...!" It was so obvious! Noire opened her eyes, as if a shining light was making it impossible to keep them closed... And in a way, one was — the shining light of the backspace button. Breathing a sigh of relief, Noire cast one last look behind her at what she had brought Neptune to doing, before she shook her head one more time. Definitely definitely _definitely_ not ready to do that. "Sorry everybody, but this scene is going straight into the recycle bin."

Noire couldn't believe how easy it was. Highlight the offending text, look behind her to save a mental picture of Neptune like that one last time (f-for... for reasons, that's why! sh-shut up!), then turn back to the computer to hit backspace and save the document.

"Noooiiiire, what's taking so long? It feels like it's been a lot longer than it takes to type out 'giant pool of pudding appears in the yard'!" Noire let out a sigh of relief as she heard the familiar voice of her wife from across the room. A quick look confirmed that Neptune was once again fully dressed and playing her game, none the wiser to what Noire had pulled.

"I'm working on it! And you're not getting a pool of pudding!" Calling back a quick response to Neptune in the hopes of appeasing her, Noire shrugged. As she began typing out the description for a nice lunch appearing out of thin air, she decided that she probably shouldn't pay too much attention to things like this. "I guess since it never finished, she doesn't remember, but since I wrote it, I do even if it didn't make it in. Weird. I wonder if that's what the real story is like too... Nah. There isn't anything like _that_ in there, is there...?"

Noire shrugged. Even if there had been, there wasn't anything she could really do about it, was there? And more importantly... Even though the crisis had been averted and no record of the text existed, Noire could still feel her heart racing at the thought of what she had done despite the fact that the only food she was describing now was the kind that would be _horrible_ on top of another person. She hoped. Boy did she hope. That, or she still had some innocence left in her despite how being associated with Neptune was _clearly_ corrupting her, which would be a nice thing (read: excuse) to consider. Whatever the case was...

This computer was dangerous. They had to end this scene quickly and let it cease to exist within the story before it was too late. What if someone like... like... like _Blanc_ got a hold of it? Imagine if she so much as opened the story she had _already written_ on it...

Noire shuddered at the thought. At least Vert was distracting her... or was in the process of... or was going to... When was this scene taking place again...? What if Vert was still with Uni right now...? Or were all four of them playing games somewhere too...? Agh, whatever! Either way, this definitely was one thing that absolutely could _not_ leave this scene.

"Aaaand... There. Get it while it's hot!" Noire leaned back as she hit the final period and saved, feeling a sense of relief and satisfaction filling her as she heard Neptune cry out in surprise at the appearance of all of her favorite foods — and, of course, not an eggplant in sight. She didn't need to turn around to know she had made the right call this time. "How is it? Good?"

"Wow Noire... This looks _great_. Why don't you come and join me? I'll even let you have the first taste."

Noire's eyes widened in horror. Had something gone wrong? Why was Neptune talking like that? Had she made a mistake...? Was this going to go just like it had for her other self...? Slowly but surely, the CPU got out of the seat to see just what she had to deal with now. She hoped Neptune at least was still decent.

To her surprise, the reason for Neptune speaking like she had was that she was hovering over the food and wiping away drool. Her eyes were sparkling and she looked positively _taken_ with the spread. Noire could have fallen over from the relief at seeing such an average sight rather than what she had been expecting.

"Noire?" Frowning, Neptune managed to pull herself away from the food to approach her wife, hands on her hips as she looked at the black haired goddess. Why was Noire acting so _weird_? "If you don't hurry, you won't even get the tenth taste. I may be a super generous CPU, but with all that just begging to move out of their parents' plates and into My Tummy Apartments, I can't promise I'll be willing to wait for you to finish having an inner monologue about how perfect I am!"

If nothing else, Noire supposed that, for better or for worse, she could always count on Neptune to get her back on her feet.

"Hah! In your dreams! Oh, and I'll be taking you up on that first through tenth taste."

"Whaaaat?! I only said first! Only the first!"


	20. Anniversary Stage 19

A very odd group of people found themselves gathered in a very odd place this afternoon. People, of course, meaning children, and very odd place, of course, meaning just about anywhere a scene possibly could take place in Gamindustri in general — though the setting here today is simply Planeptune's Basilicom. That odd part about this, of course, is that it is the Planeptune in the other dimension ("For realsies this time!" -Neptune) that this group has found themselves in.

So here, in the Basilicom of the other Planeptune, sitting around a table much too low to the ground for the average person, were none other than the ever lovable trio of Rom, Ram, and Peashy.

In other words... The kids.

"I can't believe we got stuck at the kiddy table... Can you believe it, Rom? We've done all kinds of grown up stuff before, but we still have to stick around here? This is so _stupid_!"

Naturally, none of the three were particularly thrilled that they only had the obligatory "kids do the darnedest things" scene to themselves, and apparently it wasn't even supposed to be that long judging by how much airtime the anniversary special had left. Even Peashy, who had managed to sneak into an early scene with Anonydeath after some rewrites that turned out especially lucky for her, found herself in welcome company with the twins, who had been stuck to just this scene from the get go.

"I-It's not so bad, Ram..." Rom, at least, was trying to look on the bright side of things somewhat. From her perspective, things were going pretty decently, all things considered. Blanc was paying more attention to her and Ram lately, they were getting to play with Peashy right now, and who knew what the future had in store for them? Maybe she was simply being too forgiving about these things, but as far as she could see, things weren't that bad at all. So what if they didn't get any crazy scenes in this chapter? Did they need them when they had each other? Did they even _want_ them? Off screen, poor Uni had ended up needing to borrow her computer for something after apparently going through something very bad and breaking _three_ of her own...

"I wish I could've had a scene with Neptuna..." The smallest member of the group blew a raspberry at no one in particular at the thought that she might have missed her only chance for who knew how long to see Neptune. Not that she couldn't just go over and visit whenever she wanted normally, but when would it ever work in the main story? Neptune was always so _busy_ now, and she and Ploot had things to do here anyway... Probably. It wasn't super important right now, so she didn't wanna think about it! She just missed Neptuna!

The twins exchanged a look as they watched the annoyed little blonde. At least they had gotten to be with Blanc pretty regularly up to this point. Peashy hadn't gotten to see Neptune since that one little scene in Part 1. That was... That was so unfair!

"Rom, what's that thing where we don't do stuff anymore?" Ram looked to her sister, a sort of childish desperation in her voice that would only be appropriate coming from one of the people meant to be sitting at this table. "I think we should do that thing. The one with the signs and banners and stuff!"

Ram's twin tilted her head, pressing a finger to her chin as she tried to think of what Ram could possibly be wanting from her. This should have been an easy riddle, but it took Rom a little while to reach the conclusion that Ram was looking for.

"'Protest'?" She finally offered. "You want to 'protest'...?"

"That's it! I wanna protest!" Ram smiled brightly, before she realized that such an expression was not at _all_ appropriate for the drastic, big girl move that she wanted to make here. Slapping her cheeks to quickly ready herself for her great, grownup battle, Ram shook her head furiously and crossed her arms. "I'm protesting! If we don't get any more scenes, and if Peashy can't see neptune, then I won't be in the story any more! Not in the special and not in the regular one! Can't make me do it!"

Rom simply frowned. Maybe there was some logic to it, but she didn't think this could end well... More importantly, that wouldn't be fair to Blanc if Ram disappeared, would it...? What should she do? Should she say something? Should she let Ram realize it on her own? W-What if Ram disappeared from this scene before she even got the chance...?

That idea scared her, and with that in mind, Rom knew this was something that just couldn't wait.

"Um, R-Ram..."

"Uoooooh!" Before Rom could raise her concerns, Peashy had jumped into the air in excitement, a broad smile on her own face — this all sounded like such _fun_ after all! And she wasn't appearing all that much anyway, so it'd be super easy for her to do this "protest" thing to get what she wanted! "I'm doing it too! Me too, me too!"

Rom began looking frantically back and forth between the two girls — one looked like she was going to bounce off into space at the idea, the other looked like she _felt_ like that but was instead choosing to keep it all bottled up so she could look "serious" or something. If this was their one scene, they shouldn't be wasting it doing silly things like this...!

No wonder they were stuck at the kiddy table...

"Now now, everyone... I made you all an extra special treat that's _sure _to make you feel _alllllll_ better..." Three pairs of ears perked up as three heads turned towards the source of the new voice — it was coming from the doorway and it was a very, _very_ familiar voice. Of course, it wouldn't be surprising for the CPU of Planeptune to be present in a scene that was taking place in her own Basilicom, and sure enough, there was Plutia in the flesh, controlled by nothing but her own desires and pushing one of those fancy food carts along and looking like she could fall asleep at any moment. "I think you're really gonna liiike iiiiit..."

"Whoooooa! What did you make, what did you make?!" Apparently having completely forgotten the previous issue of the protest at the idea of a special treat, Peashy returned to her sitting position to look from the cart to Plutia excitedly as the older CPU finished pushing the cart over. There was only one tray on the cart and it had one of those fancy round covers over it, encasing the entire thing and making it so the girls had absolutely no idea what kind of wonders were within.

"I'm not going to tell you _that_, silly." Plutia giggled and took a few steps back now that she had rolled the cart right up next to the three girls. The trio gathered around it, eyes wide with wonder, curiosity... and of course, hunger. "Why don't you open it up and see for yourself? I know you'll be surprised."

"No fair, I wanna know!" Pouting now, Peashy turned to Rom and Ram, her eyes pleading. She wanted to open it, but she couldn't very well plow through the two of them to do it... They had to help! If this was their only scene, she had to be a big girl and make it a team effort! "Come on, come on, don't you want to know too?"

"Y-Yeah, of course I do!" Ram stepped forward, clenching her fists and giving Peashy a sharp look, as if to tell her that she was just as ready as the little CPU was — maybe even _more_ ready! After all, she had existed waaaaay before Peashy had. She had been ready before Peashy had even been_ concept art_! "Rom, you're ready too, right?"

"U-Um... Go ahead..." As she watched the other two girls approach the food cart, Plutia glowing in the background, Rom bit her lip. She felt like this was all leading up to something, something that should have been obvious or familiar to her, but she couldn't quite put her finger on it. Just what was it...? Why would Plutia choose _this_ way to give them their snack...?

"Upsy daisy...!"

"Let's see what it is...!"

And off came the top of the lid, just like that. Nothing exploded or went wrong or anything. Rom might have thought that she had been worring for nothing... If not for the fact that something was definitely off with their "treat." For rather than a plate of delicious food, there was simply a large hole in the cart where the rest of the tray should have been — and sticking out of that hole...?

"You guys were expecting some delicious food? Too bad! It's just me, NepgeaBWAH!"

[LOADING... LOADING... LOADING... Did you know Neptune's favorite food is pudding? LOADING... LOADING... LOADING... Blanc's fanbooks are a hit in certain circles, but don't let her friends ever find out about them! LOADING... LOADING... LOADING...]

[PRESS START TO RESUME SCENE, PRESS SELECT TO REPLAY PREVIOUS CUTSCENE AND WATCH PEASHY PUNCH NEPGEAR IN THE FACE AGAIN]

"W-What the goodness?! Why is that even an option!?"

[PRESS START TO RESUME SCENE, PRESS SELECT TO REPLAY PREVIOUS CUTSCENE AND WATCH PEASHY PUNCH NEPGEAR IN THE FACE AGAIN]

"O-Oh, right... Um, start-! I push 'start'!"

[RESUMING SCENE...]

Nepgear rolled out of the side of the food cart and rolled out through the cloth covered side, clutching her nose as she tried to blink back the tears. Surprising the kids had been the plan, yes, and that had certainly happened... just to a much larger extent than she and Plutia had originally anticipated.

"Neppy Jr...? You okay? I got these but I don't think you need them after all..."

Now on the floor next to the cart, Nepgear could see that a concerned Plutia was sitting next to her, bandages and tissues in her hands — no doubt prepared for blood considering where she had been punched and by whom she had been punched by. In the back of her mind, Nepgear wondered why Plutia had been able to get those things so quickly (had she expected this...? a heads up would have been nice!) but at the moment, as she looked at a hand that was not covered with any blood, she was just grateful that it did indeed look like she wouldn't need them.

"C-Can I have a hand, Plutia...?" The CPU Candidate still felt a little woozy all the same and hesitantly reached out for the CPU, who was her partner-in-crime for this scene. The light haired girl tilted her head, as if she wasn't sure if she should take Nepgear's hand, before she smiled and nodded, helping Nepgear to her feet...

... only for her to be tackled back to the ground by the person who had brought her there in the first place.

"Are you okay?! I'm sorry I hit you...! I thought Ploot had cut off your head! I didn't want you to just be a head! Um, um... If I had known you weren't a head I wouldn't have, promise!" Peashy's words were rushed and flew out of her faster than she had tackled Nepgear, but they were clearly sincere, which was all the older girl needed to hear. Though the fact Peashy had actually thought Plutia beheading her was a realisitc possibility might be worrying... "How come you're here? What's going on?"

"G-Goodness Peashy, it's fine, I'm sorry we scared you- A-And if you let me get back up, I'll be happy to tell you..." Torn between letting the small little blonde cling to her (Nepgear was more than happy to accept and any all forms of attention and affection right now, considering how long it had been since she'd gotten to talk to anyone) and gently pushing her off so she could straighten herself, Nepgear finally managed to use the wall behind her to stand up while Peashy was still clinging to her like some kind of humanoid koala creature. "There we go...! Now let's..."

Peashy tilted her head, waiting for the explanation that still wasn't coming. She had gotten super surprised! Maybe even _scared_! So why wasn't anyone saying anything?

From her vantage point, she couldn't see how Nepgear had just caught the expressions on the faces of the twins. Tears were running down Rom's face, while Ram was doing her damnedest to hold back hers. It was almost funny to think that just a moment ago, the two had been screaming at the sight of the other Candidate's head sticking out of the food cart. Looking at the two of them, Nepgear smiled wrly — trying not to cry herself — and held up an arm, the one on the side that Peashy wasn't attached to, as if to call them over.

And that was all it took for the two of them to start running over to her as they began to wail.

Watching this scene unfold, Plutia smiled, because she was truly happy for the friends who were finally able to be reunited... and she also smiled because Neppy Jr. was probably about to be _really_ glad that she had a wall to lean on considering she had the twins barreling straight for her like that.

"I'll get some pillows." Plutia offered helpfully as the twins made impact — and to no one in particular, as the cheerful reunion was one that was clearly not meant for her to be a part of. That was okay. She had Nepgear had "reunited" off screen when they had come up with this little plan to make up for their lack of presence in the anniversary despite their increased relevance in future parts of the story anyway... "Tee hee hee... "

As Plutia made her way out of the room to find the pillows, Nepgear sent a grateful look in the direction of her retreating form — the twins had her pressed right up against the wall on one side, and with Peashy still clinging to her on her other side, it would be a miracle if she was still upright by the time Plutia got back...

"... W-Wait..."

Assuming she didn't take one look at the pillows and decide to take a nap herself, that is.

Nepgear quickly realized that, knowing Plutia, that was exactly what the upcoming punchline was — but that was okay. Blinking away the tears, she managed to return all three hugs with the biggest hug of all, her smile growing wider and wider with each passing moment. Right now, all she felt like doing was smiling.

She was finally home again.


	21. Anniversary Stage 20

"Well, Noire... This is it."

It had finally arrived. The dramatic closing sequence of the anniversary episode. The two CPUs found themselves standing atop a building as the sun set before their eyes — if Neptune had to guess, though she couldn't see or here it, the credits were rolling as a touching song with lyrics that only half-fit them played at this very moment.

"Aren't you being just a _little_ too dramatic?" Noire shot her wife a curious expression, raising an eyebrow and crossing her arms. After all... "It's not like the story is _ending_ — this is the complete opposite! The fact we managed to pull through for an entire year and that we're _still going_ was the whole reason for doing this, but you're making it look like this is the very last anyone will ever see of us. Can't you get your moods together, Neptune?"

Neptune stuck her tongue out at her wife. Now who was ruining the mood?

"I do say, I think I earned the right to be dramatic! Even after we went through editing and cutting down scenes and even cutting _out_ scenes _completely_, look how long this thing got! Kind of a weird way to say thank you, if you ask me. Couldn't we have just sent everybody a card?" Neptune shook her head, dismissively raising her arms in a half-hearted shrug. "How is everybody out there watching us in Gamindustri — and beyond, even! — supposed to know how we feel? We can't just say 'Hey everybody! Yeah, you! Especially you! Thanks for supporting us and this crazy story for this past year! Your encouragement has meant a lot, and no matter what happens with the story, even if something you don't like happens, we're super thankful for you being there and super _duper_ hope you'll stick with us and' blah blah blah, right? That'd be so... cliche."

Noire raised a hand, a single finger held up, because she _really_ wanted to point out that Neptune had just...

... Well, whatever.

"Like Oracle, like CPU I guess." Noire shrugged. Nothing she could really do about it now. That was just how Neptune was, after all, and she happened to like Neptune. "So now what? Do we just... wait? Oh, want to bring out the 'super-computer' again? There was that one idea for the scene that we didn't get to do, after all... I really wanted to look at the Part 3 spoilers that we were going to before it turned into-Mmpngh?!"

Before Noire could continue, she found an annoyingly familiar hand being pressed against her mouth. The owner of said hand had practically flown across the building and was now holding her free hand to her mouth, a single finger raised as she made the "sssshhh" hand gesture. Noire rolled her eyes and shoved Neptune out of the way, but Neptune would not be stopped.

"Noire! You can't talk about that kind of thing _here_, especially not _now_ when the credits are rolling! It's bad karma!"

"And where else am I going to get to talk about it? If you're right about those 'invisible credits' — yes, I looked at what you were thinking, since this _is_ the last time I'll probably get a chance to — then this is the last scene, isn't it?" Placing a hand on her hip, Noire shifted slightly so she could better give Neptune the _look_. "I was looking forward to seeing that... And now that I've mentioned it, I'm betting all those poor people out there are going to be disappointed that they didn't get to see it too."

"It's not like they won't get to see all that stuff eventually... We weren't going to spoil that much anyway." Neptune smiled sheepishly, shifting awkwardly from one foot to the next. Leave it to Noire to get stingy right at the finish line. "Plus, there are tons of people who hate spoilers, right? You'd just get 'em mad if we did that. Look, it'll all work out, you'll see! Didn't Part 2? Even after we had those fights? Don't you worry your pretty little head off, missy, nobody'll be missing anything — in fact, I betcha that they're all glad this wall of text is finally almost done. Man, just scroll up a little, Noire, look at the size of it! We dragged it out waaaay longer than we meant to, and I bet our ratings are in the toilet now... Oh man, oh man..."

Noire would have done a double take if she had been in the position for it, but it didn't matter — Neptune was starting off on some crazy subject that she couldn't even hope to understand. Ratings? Dragging it out? Honestly, this wife of hers. What in Gamindustri was she going on about now?

"Neptune, this was a _gift_. A completely irrelevant chapter to thank people for sticking by us and to celebrate the fact that we're still here a year later. That's _all _that it is, and that's _all_ anyone needs to take out of this! Really! That means you too, Neptune!" As she said this, seeing that Neptune clearly wasn't listening ("... and they'll introduce a new character no one likes with a special new form to try to boost toy sales! It's just like Nisa always warned me...") Noire considered something. After another moment of thought, she turned towards the closest window, as if someone might somehow be peering through it — or as if a camera might be there. That was silly though... Wasn't it? "By the way... If anyone out there is _somehow_ listening to this conversation, please don't expect anything like this to ever happen again. For something that doesn't really hit on the main story at all, much as we _are_ happy that we've made it this far and are still going, chances of us stopping everything — even work on Part 3 — for over a month like this, in fact... They're really, really slim."

Finally catching on to what Noire was doing, as if she hadn't just been in the middle of a paranoid monologue about ratings and staff changes, Neptune bounded on over, a mile-wide smile on her face, and waved to the "window."

"Sooooo, if you ever have any doubts about how much we like you guys or any of that other junk, just get your tushes back on over to this chapter instead of hoping for a new one! 'Cause while we love you guys and we love the story, we don't love you _that_ much." While Neptune seemed particularly proud of her being so brutally honest, Noire could only gape at her wife. What... the.. _hell_ had possessed her to say something like that?! How could they end things here, on a sour note like that?!

"Nep..._tune_...!" Arms poised, as if she was going to strangle the other CPU, Noire began her approach — at which point Neptune just raised a hand and offered the peace sign.

"What's with the face? I don't know about you, Noire, but I love _you_ a lot more than I do random people I've never met, and I'm sure _they_ love reading about us and reading the regular story a lot more than they did this. That's kinda what everybody's here for, in case you forgot. It's what we're celebrating, after all!" Finishing her explanation with a wink, Neptune proceeded to grab Noire by the wrist and pull her over. "And since Part 3'll be a loooong while in the making, I think it'll be best if we end this part on a high note! Whaddya say, sugar butt?"

"S-_Sugar butt_!? Anyway, listen to you! You could have said this on a much more positive note, Neptune...!"

"Come on, Noire...! Roll with it! They all know what I mean, and we're out of time and the script ended a few lines ago! We used up all the narration too, see? It's just dialogue from here on out!"

"Oh... Alright, fine!"

"Great! So thanks for reading, everybody! Hope ya didn't get too bored by Noire here-"

"- _or_ too _annoyed_ by _Neptune_."

"Hey! I am _not_ annoying!"

"Whatever. _Anyway_, random stalkers and people out there that we're pretending that we're addressing for the sake of the scene even though everyone knows we're really addressing the readers- Just remember when waiting for Part 3 that the reason Part 2 was able to come out so quickly and so frequently was because a lot of time and work had gone into it _long_ before it started coming out, so..."

"So keep your pants on! It'll be worth the wait! Probably, anyway! Now... If you excuse me, I'm going to take _Noire's_ pants _off_."

"- Eh?! B-But I'm not even wearing any..."

"Oh good, you're one step ahead of me. Attagirl!"

"Wha- That's because I _never_ wear- Stop, Neptune! Neptune? _Neptuuuuuuuuune_!"

"Aaaand that's all folks! Doo dee doo~ Dee doo doo doo dee doo doo doo doooo~ Doo doo doo doo doo doooooooo!"

_**GAME OVER**  
><em>


	22. Obligatory Post-Credits Scene

The two CPUs let out sighs of relief as one as the last of the credits rolled and the screen faded to black. They had both been terrified that there would be a post-credits scene that would take things even beyond that final exchange between Neptune and Noire. At long last, with the anniversary special done with, Vert stretched her arms out behind her and let out a quaint yawn before standing up, her heart set on those cakes that she had stashed away the night before for whatever reason. Maybe this? Still seated on the couch, Blanc could only shake her head.

"_That_ was originally going to be a single chapter? It was almost as long as all of Part 1..." The brunette pinched the bridge of her nose. For something that had been ultimately a waste of time, it had sure been a _long_ waste of time. "I think I get why Neptune was so worried about retcons and spinoffs before this started now. Part 3 could be a lot further along if we hadn't blown over a month on this thing... It's not like anything that was _that_ interesting came out of it..."

The CPU knew even as she spoke those words that that wasn't exactly true. She had enjoyed... some of it. Some of it, though, she hadn't enjoyed at all, but there had been a few things here and there that hadn't been so bad. From somewhere behind her, Blanc heard a faint giggle. It made her twitch. Vert thought that was funny, did she?

"My, I happen to like the idea myself. I'm surprised you aren't warming up to it even faster than I am." Resuming her place on the couch next to Blanc, Vert placed a plate of small cakes on the little coffee table sitting before them and bent over to tug it over. Blanc groaned at the obvious display of cleavage Vert was offering for anyone who might be looking by bending in such a way, and to her surprise, Vert suddenly laughed. "Oh dear, I would have worn something more flattering if I had known you would be staring so much, Blanc."

"Oh, come _on_, the thing is over! Isn't it? Can't we stop with the mind reading stuff already...?" Blanc's voice came out like a strained growl of sorts, to which Vert simply shook her head in amusement.

"I'm rather enjoying being able to be civil with you again like we were before the story started... Well, civil as the two of us _can_ be." Blanc was surprised to see Vert actually smiling at her as she resumed her seated position, almost like... like Vert _cared_ about her or something. All of her blood must still be in the wrong place from when she had bent over for her to have said something ridiculous like that. "Besides, we're still in a 'Special Stage,' so I don't see why we can't act like it. You're free to take advantage of that just as much as I am."

Sinking into the couch after snatching a cake off of the plate, sulking really, Blanc crossed one arm over her chest and began to munch on the sweet. She wasn't about to give Vert any more ammunition after that, definitely not.

"So why would I like this kind of thing again? None of this matters for us in the main story after all."

With that utterance, Vert's eyes lit up, as if Blanc had just said the magic words that would open the doors to the golden land. Instinctively, Blanc scooted over to the other side of the couch, already not liking where this was going and not caring that she'd thought that about Vert before. She would probably think that about Vert _a lot_ before all was said and done between them.

"Blanc, think about it. While _this_ isn't 'canon', what if, someday, we got something like it that _was_? That's the beauty of this medium of fanwork, is it not?" Smiling brightly, Vert took a cake for herself, innocently biting into it even though she was saying something completely absurd. "A 'what if' story here, a 'this happened while these things were happening' there... The possibilities are _endless_. If I were the writing type, I could write an epic love story about the two leads of _When The Tsunderes Cry_, then I could write another story that builds off of that premise but takes one of the leads and puts him with one of the minor characters instead. Doesn't that sound exciting? And it's only possible with fanfi-"

The CPU of Lowee had heard enough.

"So what you're saying is you'd rewrite this story to be one where everything happens just the way you want. How convenient." _Now_ Blanc could see why Vert was so into this idea. Knowing Vert, it'd be some twisted version of the story where all of the CPU Candidates landed on her doorstep or something... Not that she could really complain, given one of the scenes they had just gotten through watching, but... That had just been a story. It hadn't been real or what happened...!

Vert held up a finger and shook it disapprovingly, clicking her tongue as if she were a teacher correcting a child's mistake on the blackboard... or a cocky anime character about to reveal something big. Either worked.

"Now now now, Blanc, you seem to be missing the point. As far as the hypothetical new spinoff of the story is concerned, it's not 'what anyone wants.' It's just what happened. All that matters to that story is that's _in_ that story." Vert spread her arms out around them, as if to gesture to the whole world that they existed in. "After all, isn't that the case for even the main story itself? So one such spinoff story could be about, oh... Myself and Nepgear, for example! Perhaps she might wake up before I ever come to you and she and I are able to move things along naturally, without things like the issue of the nations to worry about. Or maybe some other turn of events will lead to her coming to me in a way that hasn't been able to happen yet!"

"Huh... This is unlike you. You know what's going on right now though, don't you? You don't have that excuse in the story, but now? Who's to say I'll _really_ go along with your stupid plan by the time we have to actually get down to it?" Blanc shrugged nonchalantly, popping the last bit of cake into her mouth. As she swallowed, she couldn't help but give Vert a confident look. She always loved it when she got to burst Vert's bubble. Vert was getting rather arrogant here, wasn't she? "You're making a lot of assumptions about me, you know. As far as the main story is concerned, who knows? You and me? Really? Maybe you _will_ end up with Nepge..."

Vert smiled broadly at her, victory written all over her face. It only took Blanc a second to realize the trap that she had just walked into.

Damn! She had walked right into that one too! Vert had _wanted_ Blanc to be the one to suggest that! She could have just as easily suggested a spinoff where she and Blanc got together, implying that she and Nepgear would be fated in the main story and all of that crap, but by wording it that way, she'd gotten _Blanc_ to be the one to say it this way... Oh, what a _sneaky_ little...

"There'd probably be a riot if that happened anyway." Opting for a change in subject, Blanc pointedly looked away from Vert. "That doesn't explain why _I_ would be interested."

There it was. The conversation change. The flag that the blonde had been waiting for from the start of this...!

"Oh _please_, Blanc. What happens will happen and whether I come to have a relationship with you or Nepgear or even Uni or Chika, no one and no riot can stop it. After all, I don't believe we _ever_ made any claim as to who was to be 'paired' with who, except of course for dear old Neptune and Noire. Everyone else, every_thing_ else, except perhaps for those other side pairings that have appeared in the meantime, are fair game, now aren't they? I could even end up with... Mina, for all I know." Oh bother. Even that hadn't gotten a rise out of the smaller CPU. Well, seeing that Blanc was set on the subject change now, just as Vert had hoped for, she decided to let it drop, for she had made her point anyway, and continued. "_Speaking_ of Neptune and Noire, though... Yours would be much easier. In fact, haven't we already had a scene talking about it? Just imagine this..."

Vert was quiet after that. _Too_ quiet. Blanc didn't like the sudden silence from the other CPU. Just as she was considering turning around to see what the hell was going on, she heard it — _felt_ it. The softness of a whisper in her ear, the tickle of that bimbo's breath on her skin...

"Imagine a story where you had spoken up instead of Noire, or maybe where Noire hadn't gathered her feelings quickly enough. A story where you had the chance to do what you've been regretting now for _over sixty chapters_ now. A _real_ one. Not one you wrote, Blanc... But a real story where _you_ get to be the one to marry Neptune. Nothing else before that event changes... Just that you got to speak your mind first before Noire. Wouldn't you like that chance? Wouldn't you like to see something like that happen? Mmmm...?"

Blanc spun around, eyes wide, as Vert returned to her seat, practically skipping all the way before she plopped back down onto the couch.

"B-But... But Neptune and Noire..." For once, Blanc couldn't find the words. What Vert had suggested was so preposterous and so _insane_, yet so... _enticing_ all at the same time, that she honestly had no idea how she could possibly react to it. "They..."

"Neptune and Noire would be none the wiser in that story, and neither would you. Yes, Noire might not be thrilled about it in that story, but you haven't exactly been enjoying yourself over what happened in _this_ one — that is, the main one — now have you?" Vert was speaking matter-of-factly now, and unfortunately, being a hopeful writer herself, Blanc couldn't find a flaw in her logic. It was true. Even their own series was a perfect example of this kind of thing — their own remakes and reboots and spinoffs had all done the same kind of things, hadn't they? "In the 'main' story they would still be perfectly happy and you would still be a grumpy little elf, just like normal, and in this 'new' story, _you_ would be Neptune's savior and all of that... Though I can't tell you if she would be as receptive of you as she was Noire, but it's not like this is actually happening, so for the sake of my example, I think that's enough." A beat. "_Now_ do you see the appeal?"

"I..." Blanc couldn't deny it. Maybe she would like Vert someday. Maybe she wouldn't even end up with Vert for it to matter someday. It didn't matter. Either way, she _did_ have to admit... That kind of thing... She wouldn't hate it. She shook her head, reaching for a piece of cake "I guess... Maybe?"

Vert sighed. They were never going to get anywhere if she couldn't be honest with herself. At least she wasn't as bad as Noire... Oh dear, imagine a story about _those_ two. The busty CPU shuddered at the thought of what _that_ particular trainwreck might be like. Though if she were thinking on such a broad scale... _She_ wouldn't mind being with Noire all that much, she supposed... In fact, now that she was _really_ thinking about it... Out of the three other CPUs, Noire would probably be hands down be the one that Vert would go for if she could only choose a partner from the three of them.

"Oh dear... Considering that's yet another thing I share in common with Neptune, maybe it's actually _her_ I should..."

Snarling at the idea of Neptune being with _Vert_ of all people over her — Noire she could deal with, but _Vert_? — Blanc tossed her piece of cake at Vert, hopping off of the couch as soon as she was sure it made contact with the crazy broad so she could see herself out.

"I'm going home!"

"Wait, Blanc, come back...! I wanted you to write my 'Vert and Nepgear get trapped on an island alone' spinoff for me! I already pulled some strings and have some animators lined up for the anime version...!"

"I'd rather drop dead!"

Vert sighed as Blanc slammed a door, signaling her exit from the scene.

"Honestly, that CPU... I don't see what the big deal is..." The blonde shook her head, a weary smile on her face despite the situation. "If you think about it, we're _already_ going that route anyway, aren't we? Between these 'Special Stages' here and those mysterious ones coming up that will be put into _another_ separate story but actually _are_ canon to the main one, why, I'd say it's only a matter of time before there's a story about _me_ being the one being saved by a knight in shining armor... Oh, I hope they're nice!"


	23. Original Heart!

As she peered out of the largest window in Planeptune's Basilicom, Noire just knew that today would be a good day. The sun was shining, giant bird monsters were chirping, shares worldwide were doing just _swell_, and there was no longer a horrific backlog of things that needed to get updated and posted. So long as no evil plots started up right about now to ruin her positively _positive_ mood, she was pretty darn sure that today would be fantastic. She and Neptune had the entire Basilicom to themselves for the next few days, and today seemed like the perfect day to start. Nepgear and Chian were off on their honeymoon on Leanbox's space colony, and Histoire was on a singles cruise, looking for large love in small places. Sounds reasonable, right? No? Well, maybe none of that is true, but because the only characters who are relevant to this Special Stage are Noire and her protagonistastic wife, what anyone else is doing is really up in the air! Enjoy those mental images, Gamindustri!

"Where _is_ Neptune, though?" Noire murmured to herself. Turning from the window, Noire realized that she hadn't actually seen her wife all morning — not after breakfast anyway. Neptune had scarfed her food down, mentioned something about needing an important item from the basement, and run off... She didn't even know this Basilicom _had_ a basement. "Well, maybe she's still looking for... whatever it was? I can't believe she'd blow me off when we finally get this place to ourselves... That 'item' of hers better be worth it."

Shaking her head, Noire figured that if Neptune was missing, then she had nothing better to do than to descend into the Basilicom's depths herself. If Neptune wasn't there, she'd have just wasted a little time, but if she was? Then _maybe_ they could start enjoying themselves like a proper married couple for a change, no consoles or business or work or sisters to speak of to get in their way.

"O-Only because the opportunity has presented itself, though! If it weren't for that, then there'd be no reason to do it." Noire reminded herself. It wasn't like she...

... Oh, who was she kidding? There wasn't even anyone around _to_ kid.

The CPU sighed and headed off to find some stars, her cheeks tinged with pink.

Some things never changed.

* * *

><p>As it turned out, the Basilicom <em>did<em> have a basement... in a manner of speaking. As far as Noire knew, "basements" didn't really look like the area she had just entered — she wondered if this was a secret dungeon, if anything. The fact of the matter was that the "basement" was so tremendous that, upon putting her foot on the ground after the last stair, Noire had to wonder if she had just stepped inside some kind of ancient Planep-tomb rather than their basement of all things. It may have been lit well enough, but... What in Gamindustri could Neptune be looking for in a place like _this_? It was bigger looking than an entire city block, maybe even more — how was all of this even under one building? Did it expand beyond it?

Noire was at a loss for words. If Neptune _had_ come down here looking for something, it was no wonder she hadn't come back. She'd probably gotten lost!

"Neptune?" Cupping her hands around her mouth, Noire called out the other CPU's name in a random direction. She could hear her voice echoing all across the strange "basement" area. Who knew how far this really went back? Maybe it extended to underneath all of Planeptune, or at least the main city? That would be crazy! Despite herself, Noire imitated Neptune's voice, as if imitating what she thought might be the reason for such an absurd place to exist. "'Don't you know anything, Noire? Main characters need to have access to random buildings to break into at all times! How else are we supposed to get paid?' Right, Neptune? Sheesh..."

Noire shook her head. She doubted that the reason was anything as silly as _that_, but... With Neptune, one could never be too careful. Speaking of careful, considering this area was one she had never been to before and knew nothing about, despite her desire to track down her wife, who was _supposedly_ down here (maybe she had lied to see if Noire would actually come down?), now that Noire was actually seeing it for herself, she was getting the distinct feeling that it might be better for her to not try to go spelunking here without some kind of guide — Neptune might know her way around or have her minimap of the place filled out enough to know her way around, but Noire didn't and Neptune had all of their Eject Buttons on hand right now.

"I guess there's always tomorrow..." Noire commented to herself, feeling rather sullen. Sure, she had tried to convince herself (rather badly) that she wasn't all that interested in spending the day with Neptune, but now that it looked like she wouldn't be able to find the other CPU? That was downright depressing.

Turning to leave, glad she hadn't traveled so far that she couldn't still see the stairs, Noire resigned herself to another afternoon of stealing Neptune's clothes to cosplay her and pretending her pillow was Noire herself — or maybe just normal cosplaying things — when she heard a crash. Alarmed, Noire turned on her heel. If Neptune _had_ been down here... Then surely that noise had involved her! Whether it was danger or something stupid, it was a clue, and if Noire followed the noise, there was no doubt in her mind that she'd find her wife.

Relieved, the black haired young woman took off, not paying attention to where she went or how she got there. The sound had definitely come from _this_ direction, past those strange looking statues, around that massive pile of stuffed animals, just beyond those empty vats that Noire was going to pretend weren't labeled "100% PUDDING," and now all she had to do was turn this corner and...!

"_There_ you are!" Before her hesitation and reservations could catch up with her (they were still trying to get over the boxes of limited edition Nep Bull that had been stashed down here), Noire saw the outline of the CPU she had been looking for. She must have transformed for some reason, perhaps to avoid whatever that crashing noise had been, because the outline Noire was heading for was closer to that of Purple Heart than that of Neptune, but no matter. Noire was just _so_ happy to see her wife after all of this wasted time. "Why did you come down here by yourself? Jeez, you really _are_ a big..."

Noire gasped, retracting her arms from the person that she had reached for. She had assumed only Neptune would be down here, obviously, but... Shockingly, now that she was close enough to get a good look, not only was there someone she had never seen before here, but this person _appeared_ to be...

"A CPU...?!" Lastation's CPU felt alarmed. Either Planeptune had been hiding another CPU all this time in their basement, or someone, perhaps from a newly developed nation, had broken in and was up to no good. It would explain why she hadn't seen Neptune for so long too! This intruder had taken advantage of her wife's carefree nature, that must be what had happened. Neptune had probably come down here to find a present for Noire and had gotten attacked! That was the story that Noire was going to stick with, anyway.

There was something strangely familiar about this CPU, though... She was looking at Noire like she was familiar with her, which made no sense to Noire, because she had never seen this CPU before in her...

Noire squinted. There was... _something_ about her... Her eyes, a light turquoise, not quite blue or green in color, were watching Noire, clearly waiting for a reaction. Her hair... It was tied back in long, single braid, which was sort of familiar but sort of not... And it was definitely the right color for Planeptune, but at the same time, it was a _lot_ lighter, like Neptune or Nepgear had tried to get it bleached but hadn't gone all the way with it. This HDD form... Not that Noire was the type to get worked up about this sort of thing, but it seemed like her bust wasn't that far off from her own... And the form itself? It was reminiscent of something, but... Noire felt like the colors were off... What was a dark purple should have been a light purple, what was black should have been dark purple... Bits of metallic silver decorated her armor, and _that_ actually reminded Noire of...

Slowly, Noire raised a hand to rub at her eyes. The similarities were all there. They were impossibly obvious to her now... The CPU still had yet to speak or even so much as _react_ to what Noire had done. She was either exceptionally slow or she wanted to see Noire's reaction without so much as giving any hint to her identity... Or maybe... _Maybe_... Wracking her brain, Noire finally came up with an answer — and once it dawned upon her, Neptune's earlier behavior all made sense. The "item" that Neptune had come down here to find? It was standing right before her very eyes!

"Neptune... Neptune..."

The CPU's eyes lit up. Her lips turned upwards into a small smile.

"Neptune _created a child for us_...?!"

The CPU's mouth opened, her expression one of surprise.

"I... I can't believe this... I know we're making a game console now, so I guess it makes sense it would have a personification, b-but this is so sudden! I... I mean..." Noire shook her head. She was embarrassing herself _in front of her daughter_! Oh gosh... _She had a daughter now_! Taking a deep breath, Noire gently placed her hand on the CPU's arm in what she hoped was a motherly gesture. This was so sudden...! "I-I don't know what to say... Where's your... mother? Y-Your other one, I mean, u-um... S-She should be d-d-down here too, right? I really need to talk to her about this- _You_, I need to talk to her about _you_!"

What did this make her title, though...? Purple Daughter? Black Daughter? Purple-Black Daughter?! What a mouthful! No one better make fun of her, or else Noire would show them what for!

The CPU — CPU Daughter? CPU... Spawn...? What was the proper thing to say here!? Was it Candidate here too? — was biting her lip. She _still_ had yet to say anything... Had Noire made a bad impression? Of course she had! She had practically jumped _her own daughter_!

Although... If Neptune had just "made" her, then... Maybe it really did get back to Noire's original thought...?

"D... Do you not know how to talk yet?" Noire tilted her head, concerned. Maybe she was just confusing the poor girl. Maybe, despite her looks in _this_ form, if she returned to normal, she would look like a young girl — maybe even younger than Peashy... And... And she'd look like her and Neptune, wouldn't she? Noire had to turn away from the CPU at that thought, clutching her bright red cheeks as her heart pounded away. "What will she look like? What if she's more like me than Neptune? Wait, what if she's more like _Neptune_ than me?"

Amidst the pitter pattering of her heart and her imagination running absolutely wild...

"Pfft."

Noire blinked. A sound had come out of her child's lips. It was almost like... No, this girl was a mere day old, she couldn't make _that_ sound. Of course, Noire had been making the situation worse by ignoring her — she would just accept the girl no matter how she looked or what sort of sounds she made! With that in mind, Noire turned around and faced the strangest sight yet.

Her daughter was holding her hand to her mouth, looking like she was desperately trying not to... To throw up...? Did the baby need to throw up...?! How was this supposed to work!? She was bigger than Noire right now! Noire couldn't burp her if-

The CPU couldn't hold it in... and she laughed.

It was a very _familiar_ laugh.

"F-Forgive me, Noire, I was _sure_ you would realize, but then you jumped to this conclusion and I-"

As soon as the CPU had started speaking, it all became clear. Noire's eyes widened, her jaw set as her cheeks began to burn an embarrassed crimson. That was why "her daughter" hadn't said anything...! It wasn't because she didn't know _how_ to talk... It was because she _couldn't_...

Because her _voice_ would give her _true _identity away!

"_Neptuuuuuuune..._!"

The CPU who looked like Purple Heart and Black Heart had been stuck in a character-fusing-blender offered an apologetic smile as Noire raised a shaking, angry hand — unsure of what to do with it, of what she _could_ do with it to the CPU before her. She was still _acting_ like someone more mature (though after this little practical joke, Noire wasn't so sure about that) than Neptune was... Or rather, she was acting like Purple Heart. There was no doubt about it now. Whether this was some kind of strange new processor set or what, this was definitely Noire's missing wife.

Neptune... Or Purple Heart or Purple-Black Heart or whoever she was now, decided to take the initiative by taking Noire's raised hand into her own, her smile still apologetic... and maybe just a little bit amused.

"This is what I wanted to find. It's a... special processor set that takes form based on the user's shares. I wanted to see what I would look like now." The transformed Neptune smiled knowingly as understanding dawned on Noire's face. "That's right. Your shares are my shares and my shares are your shares. You would think that our transformations would have changed form as soon as our marriage was settled and we became connected, but I suppose that kind of thing is too confusing for a story like this... It's an interesting concept though, isn't it? And you weren't _too_ far off in your little theory either, if you think about it. Maybe a hypothetical child of ours _would_ look something like this."

Noire wanted to be upset with Neptune for letting Noire act like that, and she wanted to ... yet looking at this form Neptune was in, this physical state that could only be described as _them_...

Her sentimental thoughts about Neptune wanting to look like "them" were interrupted as her gaze settled on the transformed Neptune's chest once more. Her bust matched the size of neither Black Heart nor even herself as Purple Heart... It was somewhere in between. For sure. Meaning this form really _was_ both of them... Which _meant_...

"Wait. Wouldn't I look exactly the same if I used this? Wouldn't that be... y'know... kind of weird?"

The HDD CPU blinked, raising a hand to her chin thoughtfully. Noire breathed a sigh of relief. At least in this form, Neptune wouldn't-

"Some people would probably call it 'hot,' Noire."

"Oh come on!"

* * *

><p>As the two CPUs (<em>not<em> transformed, thank you very much — Noire had made Neptune put that "special" equipment in her inventory so she could stop being weirded out by it) began their climb up the staircase back into the Basilicom, where Noire hoped they could _finally_ start on enjoying their day, Noire found herself being stopped by a hand clutching her wrist. Sighing, the black haired girl turned around — she _really_ wasn't in the mood for more games right now. This had just been one weird event after another weird event, and all she wanted to do was take Neptune upstairs, sit on the couch with her, and act like she would rather be anywhere else while loving every moment of being in the presence of her wife.

"Neptune, what are you..."

"I don't think we _can_ have kids, Noire, but... I'm sorry! I shouldn't have let that drag on...! It was just... You know how I... Anyway, I, uh, dunno what I can really do more than that, but..." Noire tilted her head as Neptune bowed her head, her body language offering as much of an apology as her words. Way to add a serious note to this scene right at the end, Neptune."I'm super super sorry, Noire!"

Strangely enough... Noire wasn't actually bothered by it. She _wasn't_ ready for that kind of thing, after all, as this had oh so clearly proven to her, and she was already thinking about her and Neptune's future console like their "baby" anyway — even if it _was_ possible through some freak manipulation of shares (nothing would surprise her at this point), there was no _way_ it was ever going to be on the table for them any time soon, and certainly not within this story's time frame... And yet, more than that, she just found this kind of... funny.

She didn't want to embarrass Neptune right now, so she simply nodded slowly, glad Neptune's head was still bowed.

She couldn't help but let one thing slip out.

"P... Pfft."

Like a bullet firing from a gun, Neptune's head shot up, and the CPU looked at her wife like a stunned little child.

"Huh? W-What's so funny?!"

Noire shook her head furiously, doing her best to cover her mouth to restrain any further amusement escaping her. She hadn't meant to let Neptune know how she felt! Neptune had been being so _serious_ with her, after all!

"I just... I think this is the first time I've ever seen you apologizing for something you've done as Purple Heart in this form. Isn't it usually the other way around?"

Neptune's mouth fell open somewhat.

"Noire, I have to change back! The processor must have switched my personalities around! If I don't change back before midnight, I'll be trapped this way forev-_OW!_ Why do you always do this to me?! Get some new punchlines! Nooooiiiiiireeee...!"

Sighing, Noire rolled her eyes as she pulled Neptune up the stairs — _gently_ — by her ear.

Neptune definitely didn't have to worry about her personality going anywhere or doing anything, that was for sure.


	24. Of Pudding Pools and Shark Attacks

As she watched the group of hard working NPCs move around on the lawn before her, Neptune shook her head. They all were holding a piece of a long, single strand of rope, and at a glance, one might assume that Neptune was trying to get the borders set up for some kind of hole in the ground... Though what she planned on doing with that hole was anyone's guess. Knowing Neptune, it probably wasn't a good thing, that was for sure.

"A little to the left guys... No no no, _my_ left! Now you have to go forwards! No, I mean backwards! Gosh, never send a group of grown men in to do a small statured girl's job..."

Noire, who had no idea that Neptune was doing anything with anyone today, could only assume that Neptune might have remembered that "pool of pudding in the yard" comment from that special something or other that they weren't supposed to remember anymore, and knew it was her duty as the voice of reason to set the record straight. There would be no pudding pools on their lawn — or any lawn, for that matter. Think of the bugs!

Approaching the strange group made Noire pause, however, for the NPCs seemed to be affiliated with a generic landscaping company, so generic that their logos didn't even have words on them — just imagery meant to evoke a "wow! they landscape!" sort of feeling. Noire supposed Neptune could have just lied about her intentions, but would she really do that to her followers? That just didn't seem like her...

... Okay, it didn't seem like her _anymore_, anyway.

"Neptune? This isn't for pudding, is it?" Straight to the point, Noire placed a hand on her hip and watched for reactions — particularly those of the NPCs. If they were in on it, even if Neptune tried to cover it up, there was no way any of these guys would be able to defy the stare of a goddess such as herself. "_Is it_?"

The NPCs, rather than look guilty, all excitedly began exchanging looks. "It's Lady Black Heart, it's Lady Black Heart!" and the like began erupting amidst this ragtag group of workers, and Noire got the distinct feeling that she was about to wish it had been something ridiculous like a pudding pool. Neptune, telling the group of Planeptune workers to take five, hopped on over to Noire as soon as they set off, an all too innocent expression on her face.

"Hiya, Nep Black! Here to stop my evil plans?" Noire sighed at the name, shaking her head. How many times had it been now...? In fairness, she supposed they were probably overdue for Neptune calling her that, weren't they? She wished she could come up with a pet name like that for Neptune... It would be so embarrassing, though...! But why should Neptune get to be the only one who had a pet name...?! "Uh, Noire? You in there? Your eyes didn't turn yellow, so you're not dead..."

"M-My eyes don't change color like that!" Crossing her arms, Noire let out a light "harumph!" under her breath as she shot a look past Neptune and towards the abandoned bit of rope on the ground. "Now answer my question, and not with another one this time either."

The CPU grinned.

"It's for the talking shark I'm gonna get us. I need to give this a lot of room since I want it to have a friend."

Noire closed her eyes, before pinching the bridge of her nose and taking a deep breath. Curious as to why she wasn't getting chewed out yet, Neptune leaned forward, on her tiptoes, and tilted her head. What was going on? Was Noire actually okay with it...?

"Sorry, Neptune, I think my life just glitched. Can you repeat that?" Stay calm, Noire. Stay calm. Neptune definitely hadn't said what Noire thought she had. There was no way, in no uncertain terms, that Neptune had...

"It's for the talking shark that I'm-"

Darn it Neptune! Stop letting her down at times like this!

"We are _not_ getting a talking shark!" Noire cried indignantly, heading towards the rope to stop this madness before it got so far out of hand that there wasn't any hope of going back from it. "Why would you even _think_ about something so ridiculous? Let alone get some people out here to actually make it a habitat... I'll show you a 'shark,' that's what I'll do."

"But Noooiiiire! We _need_ one! It has to be our new Oracle!" Protesting with all her might, Neptune latched onto one of the black haired CPU's wrists and dug her feet into the ground. For the sake of her future shark friend, she could not fail! "Everyone is doing it! Do you want to be _lame_, Noire?"

Noire wasn't sure which part of that she liked less. The implication that anyone was doing it, or the idea that she could possibly ever be lame. Deciding on the more logical approach, Noire turned and gave her wife a good, hard look in the eye.

"First, don't assume I'm okay with it, by the way, because we both have perfectly fine Oracles right now. I'm just humoring you." With that out of the way, Noire offered her wife a confident smirk and held up a single finger. It was all she needed to win this argument and save the lawn from certain doom. "So Neptune, I just want you to do this: Name one person who is hiring a talking sea creature as their Oracle. Just one. If you can't, this conversation is over and you're giving all your pudding to those NPCs. Okay, go."

"Just one? Well, my cousinmomsister from the new game is doing it." Well that was unexpected. Neptune actually had an answer? Just as Noire was about to bring up the fact that that couldn't possibly true, not to mention none of the characters in that game were any of those things to Neptune, certainly not all of them at once, Neptune pulled a rolled up picture out of her hoodie's pocket and proudly presented it to Noire. "See? Look at this hottie. Don't you just... Don't you just wanna fry him up and make fish sticks out of him? He's practically doing it himself he's so smoking!"

Much as she wanted to protest and comment on Neptune's terrible fish joke... Upon closer inspection of the picture, the art style _did_ fit their universe — in other words, the art style of the goddess above even they, the goddessesses themselves.

What it didn't fit, though, was what Neptune was doing now.

"Neptune, that's a tiny little fish with an emoticon for a head. That doesn't explain a talking shark or a talking shark's _friend_ at all." Smoothly sidestepping the fact that she had been technically proven wrong, for this was a sea creature of some kind, Noire raised an eyebrow and awaited Neptune's answer. "That's more than a little jump in the food chain, isn't it?'

Neptune didn't even miss a beat in replying.

"It is!" Holding up three fingers, Neptune offered Noire a simple "ha ha ha!" sort of laugh, as if she was about to explain the truth behind a great mystery that only a child would still not understand. "First! If the important new main characters have fishies as their new Oracles, we gotta have one too! Second! Our new console needs all new stuff to go with it, including an Oracle! So why not a fish to keep up with the times? And third! Since we're definitely way better than any 'new' and 'original' character will ever be, our fish Oracle should be the best kind of fish you can get!"

With that, Neptune spun around and finished up with a pose.

"And that's why I'm getting us a talking shark!"

Noire groaned. Right now, she _seriously_ wished it had just been a pool filled with pudding that Neptune wanted. Only Neptune could come with something like this to totally surpass her worst expectations...

... though hold on. Hold on one moment here!

"That doesn't make sense." Shaking her head, the black haired CPU twirled a finger in the air and, by the power of breaking the fourth wall, called forth a literal text box featuring Neptune's last piece of dialogue for the pair of them to look at. This actually took Neptune off guard — the Special Stages were evolving! they could actually rip it out and touch the script now! — but Noire paid it no matter, instead tapping part of the box instead. "Look at this part. What you said here."

"Noire, is what I said important right now? You just did something that could _revolutionize_ our story as we know-"

"Neptune!"

"Fine..." Sighing, Neptune made a mental note to abuse this discovery someday for all it was worth, before looking at the specific words that her wife was trying to get her to look at. Nothing seemed that strange to her, though... "What? Are you saying I'm _not_ better than any new charac... Wait! Noire! You _do_ like that fat version of me better than you like me me, don't you!? I should have known!"

The CPU of Lastation had to try very hard not to whack Neptune over the head with the text box right then.

"T-That's not what this is about at all, stupid! And you know it!" Starting to get just a bit frustarted now, Noire pointed to the text herself. "Look, see this? You're better than _any_ new character? Don't you think that's a little strange? I mean, okay fine, _ignoring_ your ego, isn't there something wrong with that, Neptune?"

"Hey, I said 'we,' ya know." Neptune shrugged awkwardly, giving her wife a rather dismissive look. She wasn't really sure where Noire was going with this, but she definitely wasn't feeling it from where she stood now, that was for sure. She needed to find a shark store before they went out of season...! Who knew how hard it would be to find one that talked and had a witty personality that bounced off of her perfectly? The friend, meanwhile, could fit with Noire. "What's the big deal?"

Neptune's head was looking really tempting right now... but Noire restained herself. Instead, she took in a breath and calmed herself.

"Wouldn't your shark be a new character too? And its friend? Wouldn't both of them be that?" She quirked a brow and waited to see how Neptune would react to this, hoping that it wouldn't shock her too much. "And if our console has an Oracle... Going off of last chapter, s-shouldn't it need some proper representation t-too? So... So are you saying you'd be better than..."

Neptune grimaced.

"Fine, fine, I get it!" She crossed her arms, a noticably annoyed pout on her face. She hated it when Noire used _logic_ on her like that. It was so totally _unfair_! Who wanted _logic_ in a story about _her _anyway? That stuff was no fun at all! "I'm still the main character here, but fine, I'll allow it."

For a moment, there was silence between the pair. After all, they were bordering a very dangerous topic right now. One wrong step, and they'd go from joking about a new Oracle and a what-if daughter to unleashing the very contents of Pandoriginala's Box itself...

What? Never heard of the feared thing? If only Gamindustri were so lucky!

It was a box that kept Gust's new boss and who knew who else from escaping into the world... From girls with two toned hair that trapped people in schools to girls made of cloth strung together as though they were a rather cute sack person... From CPUs of other, long forgotten lands to physical manifestations of atrocities like pay to win games and overpriced DLC...! It held the potential to both create and destroy, to bring life and to bring death...! All of it was kept hidden away from the world in that one tiny box... Just one tiny box...

It was a box that kept that which was new at bay. It was a box that kept that which was original far from that which was rehashed and redone. It was a box that...

"N-N-N-N-Neptune! Where did you get that!?"

... was in Neptune's hands at this very moment?!

"Weeeeeell, I figured if you could make the _text_ boxes real..." Neptune was grinning from ear to ear as the tossed the cube back and forth from one hand to the other, a criminally guilty expression on her face as she watched Noire's eyes go wide every time the little thing left one hand and traveled to the next. "I could make this one too. Besides, if you think about it, Nep Jr. and the rest of the kids were just 'new' and 'original' at one point too, but now we all love them plenty, right? Who says all the people stuck in here shouldn't have a chance?"

"That's..." Noire bit her lip. While Neptune certainly raised a good point, one that she would be proud of her wife for coming up with under normal circumstances, with Neptune holding onto that thing right now, she couldn't help but be wary instead. "I guess that's true, but now really isn't the time to let all of them out, is it?"

Neptune frowned. Noire had been the one to show her the light! Why was her wifey turning her back on her at such a crucial time?

"Why not? Wasn't everyone like that at some point? Iffy, Compa, our sisters... What about Kei and the rest of them, huh? How come these guys aren't welcome here to even have a chance but we were tooootally okay with all our sisters and Oracles and Plutie and everybody else?" Shaking her head, Neptune extended the box towards Noire. "Is it 'cause you're worried they'll take your spot on the popularity poll? Is that it?"

The black haired CPU ran a hand through her hair nervously. They were getting dangerously close to opening it now, even without actually doing it! Stop, Neptune, before it's too late!

"Neptune, that kind of thing... Isn't... You know..." Noire waved a hand in the air, making a few circular motions, in the hopes that her point would be made through that action. It was true, after all. Unfair as it was, new things were usually given a lot more scrutiny than the old, and the kind of new things Neptune was trying to set loose. "I'm worried about the _opposite_ happening. That they'll all be on the bottom for not being the kind of characters people want to see."

The smaller of the two tilted her head.

"So? How come the ones who might should lose out 'cause of the ones that might not, huh? There's always gonna be stinkers. We've got stinkers too! Everybody's a stinker to somebody — I bet even _you_ reek if you asked the right person. That person's crazy, 'cause you smell fine, but if we just worried about stuff like that, we'd never shake up the status quo... No one would buy our games anymore!" With that, before Noire could even comment on the comments about her smell, Neptune tossed the box high into the air and spread her arms wide. "Think about it! Blanc never would have gone into 3D games if she did that! Our sisters wouldn't exist! Vert and _Iffy_ would probably be the ones married right now, and poor Compa would be all alone! Plutie, P-ko... They wouldn't even be here! In fact..."

Rather than listen to Neptune for much more, Noire held her arms over her head and waited — as soon as the box came down, she just knew there was going to be some kind of explosion. It would either be a real explosion, an explosion of them getting overwhelmed with darkness, or maybe just an explosion of sound from all of the new people the box being opened was sure to bring. Squeezing her eyes shut, Noire awaited the end. If nothing else, their cancelation was guaranteed now.

Strangely enough, though...

Nothing happened.

No explosion. In fact, there was barely any sound at all. Unless Neptune had thrown that thing so hard it had left the planet itself (maybe leading to a segway for a weird "Planet of the Originals" spinoff where the movie ended with the lost-in-space Neptune finding the ruins of the Neptower...? was that her game now...?!), chances were... Nothing was going to happen either.

As Noire slowly opened her eyes and lowered her arms, what she found before her was something fairly different from the scene that she had expected to find upon looking at the world again. No chaos or doom and gloom, or worst of all, the unexpected and different. No... Instead, Neptune was simply extending a text box towards Noire.

It read: "_Even you and me wouldn't be here. This story — _our_ story — wouldn't be here._"

Noire chuckled, smiling wryly. Now that had been unnecessarily dramatic, now hadn't it, Neptune?

The point had definitely been made, though, that was for sure. It had been made loud and clear.

"Okay, I get it. Honestly, you take this 'main character' thing a little too seriously sometimes. Isn't Nepgear supposed to be the preachy one out of the two of you? You might want to worry about being called annoying in a _different_ way now." Despite her words, the tone she spoke them in made it clear she was teasing. Shaking her head, Noire placed a hand on her hip, taking the text box from Neptune as a sort of token of affection, to which Neptune responded with a stupid looking grin — though that wasn't saying much considering this was Neptune they were talking about here.

At this point, Nepgear might have made a cameo appearance to comment on Noire's unfair comment about her, but unfortunately for her, the restraining order the plot had filed against her for interacting with any major characters in the Special Stages would be in effect until Part 3. Instead, she found herself somewhere else, doing who knows what with who even knew. The scene _might_ have even made a detour to show off just what that something was... But why not save it for another day instead?

"Now that's what I call foreshadowing."

"Damn you, conveniently worded restraining order that has never been mentioned before now! Damn yoooouuu!"

Noire rolled her eyes. Way to kill the moment, Neptune. It was just as well, she supposed, she was starting to feel like this was dragging... Or more like... What was it...? Hmmm...

"Anyway, since that crisis has been averted and we're on the same page now, I'm going back inside." Although she felt like she was forgetting something important, Noire let out a yawn as she turned towards the Basilicom, stretching one arm over her head to stretch the other straight up.

Neptune watched her, a glint in her eyes that went unseen by Noire. Her lips curved upwards in a smirk.

She had been waiting for this.

"So... We're on the same page?" Her first question was asked innocently. Her true intentions could never be discerned from something as simple as this. For this was the first piece of bait of many... Now that things had come to this... Neptune was going to...!

Stopping, Noire frowned. Was Neptune still confused about something? It was all pretty clear to her. Shooting a glance behind her and seeing her wife, looking fairly confident and normal, Noire paid the feeling no mind.

"Yeah, we are. Why do you ask?" The black haired CPU didn't suspect anything. Neptune was sure of it. And yet... It still wasn't time! It was too early to strike! Not yet!

"That means that you're saying new characters are good?" Neptune offered Noire an innocent, sweet sort of smile. Childlike even, like she was saving the game for the very first time in her young life. It was the face of an angel!

An angel of _deceit_, that is.

"Yes." Shrugging, Noire turned again, ready to head back into the Basilicom — she was getting a little hungry at this point, and for the strangest reason that she couldn't quite remember, she felt like ordering some fish... Why would she feel like having fish out of nowhere, though...?

"And you're saying they're okay?" As Noire turned away from her, Neptune found her grin widening. She was taking the bait, she was taking the bait! Just a little more... One more push... All Neptune needed was...!

"_Yes_, Neptune. I said it first, remember."

Bingo!

"Great! I'm glad you agree!"

Upon hearing the surge of enthusiasm in Neptune's voice, coming from when she had been speaking in a much slower tone only moments, seconds prior, Noire spun around — but the only sight that greeted her was Neptune's retreating back, heading off to who knew where.

"Wh- Huh? What are you..."

Neptune looked over her shoulder, grinning wolfishly as she offered Noire a thumbs up. In that moment, Noire remembered exactly what it was she had forgotten — and why she had suddenly had a craving for fish of all things.

"I'm off to get our shark!"

"You are not!"

No matter how she felt about new people (and no, that didn't mean she wanted friends or anything like that, before anyone says anything!), that did _not_ mean that Noire was okay with them adopting a talking shark to be their new Oracle! She'd sooner let Histoire and Kei dress up as sharks, and seeing as that was never going to happen, they certainly were never getting a real one!

Thus, as Noire gave chase, that, dear Gamindustri, was the day that Noire herself ended up becoming the "shark" chasing down its prey, while poor Neptune was the "fish" going to be eaten up.

And no, it was not at all going to be in the fun way.


	25. Remake Zone Stage V

"This is so exciting... We're getting a remake too...! We're reaaaally getting ooone...!"

"I can't wait, I can't wait! I'm gonna see Neptuna and Ploot again!"

"Huh...? But Peashy, I'm right here..."

"Huh? Oh yeah! Ploot! I missed you so much!"

"Huuuuuuh...? I went somewhere? Why didn't anyone tell me...?"

Nepgear couldn't help but laugh at the antics of the two CPUs before her. Being the bearer of the remake torch, so to speak, and still being forbidden from interacting with people she would actually be primarily interacting with come Part 3, she found herself spending time with some of her other friends. As it happened, all this meant was that that "terrifying foreshadowing" Neptune and Noire had been so concerned about simply amounted to her spending time in the other dimension with Plutia, Peashy, and the others there.

"Now now, you two, it hasn't been released _yet_..." Nepgear held up her hands to try to calm her two friends, but they didn't seem dissuaded from their celebrations in the slightest. It was understandable, of course, though she wondered if it was really okay for them to be celebrating it so early. Looking at how pleased the two of them looked... Nepgear sighed in defeat. "I guess it's okay."

Seeing their dimensionally (and plot) misplaced friend give in to their nepdeer games, the two CPUs exchanged a delighted look and each reached out for one of her arms. Nepgear let out a yelp of surprise as she was tugged onto the couch the pair was seated on, finding herself the center of a Nepgear Sandwich, which Plutia and Peashy rolls working as the bread.

"W-What the goodness... I don't think I deserve anything like this. Especially since I'm going to have more than enough to talk about soon enough anyway." Smiling bashfully at her fellow CPUs, she wrapped an arm around each of their shoulders cheerfully. "You two are the ones who have something to celebrate here, not me. I'm very happy for you both."

"Me too! I know! I'm gonna get started on it!" Peashy cried out cheerfully, thrusting her free arm into the air. The two other CPUs watched the enthusiastic girl fondly. Seeming not to notice, the girl began to pull out a sketchpad and some crayons out of her inventory and began drawing what she presumably must have thought the remake would be like. "... And Neptuna'll go 'kaboom!' and then... 'Kabam!'"

Nepgear blinked a few times, already feeling a bit concerned as to what Peashy was hoping to see come out of this new game, before she turned to Plutia. The CPU simply offered her a knowing smile, which... actually didn't help at all! Had they been importing games from Leanbox while she and Neptune were away...!? What was with the explosions!?

As Nepgear tried to figure out just what had happened with Peashy's upbringing, the girl in question declared she needed to get more crayons — she had already used up all the red and orange!? — and dashed off, leaving Nepgear and Plutia to their own devices. Nepgear shook her head. Maybe she was overthinking this...?

"Is it that surprising? You've seen her SP Attacks, riiiight?" Plutia tilted her head, eyes lazily looking at Nepgear as she waited for the girl to recall those special attacks of the little girl's — dramatic explosions fit for action stars and superheroes filled them all. She even put Nisa to shame sometimes! Recalling how dangerous it had been raising her Lily Rank with the girl, Nepgear found herself smiling awkwardly and nodding to Plutia's question. That was an experience that she wouldn't soon forget, that was for certain. "That's right... So Neppy Jr., Neppy Jr... What's it like? You _haaaave_ to tell me."

The CPU Candidate frowned. She would have thought Plutia knew that better than anyone, except for maybe her sister. Was she actually more experienced in this area? That... was surprising! It made her feel a little bit more adult-like, even!

Crossing her arms, Nepgear nodded in the way that she knew was the sort of way a wise old sage would. Slow and with purpose.

"Well... You always have to keep healing items on hand, because she isn't very good at holding back. It's not as bad before she changes, but once she transforms, her claws can get tangled in your hair if you don't watch out. It's okay, though, because you'll get used to that eventually. _You_ should be okay, but for me..." Nepgear fought back a shudder at the memory. It stopped happening as frequently once their Lily Rank got a little higher and they got more used to each other, but those first times had _really_ hurt... "Ask Compa for anything she has for burns, small and big, whenever you plan on being alone with her. Just in case. Oh, and if you aren't too careful, you might get stuck in her chest... T-Though... That can actually be kind of nice after she's been beating you up all day... It was kind of like the reward for being able to withstand all of... Huh? P-Plutia?"

For some strange reason, Plutia was looking at her with an oddly excited look. W-Wasn't this the kind of thing she wanted to know...? How to raise her Lily Rank with Peashy?

"Noooo... Nepgear, I meant about the _remake_. Not about _Peashy_..." It was terrifyingly clear that Plutia had taken a quick peek into the narration, or maybe she just understood Nepgear well enough to realize where her mistake had been. The way she was smiling now...! Oh no! What had Nepgear done...?! She had triggered the worst possible flag at the worst possible time! "I mean... I had nooo _idea_ you liked to have so much _fun_ like that. Maybe we should work on _our_ Lily Rank too? Don't worry, I won't tug on anything _aaany_ harder than you like..."

The CPU Candidate swallowed, realizing her fatal mistake — of course Plutia would have been asking her about the remake! It was why she was here in the first place!

There was nothing she could do about it now, however. Plutia already had that glint in her eye, a hand already placed gently on Nepgear's shoulder... In vain, Nepgear reached for Plutia in turn, but she knew even if Plutia was just playing, what was going to pass would pass no matter what she...

"R-Really, i-if you think about it... T-This is a good chance, right? Maybe I can help my ratings a little with a remake too...? I could even start appearing more in the story!"

"That would be soooo cool, mama!"

Thank goodness! Peashy had returned! Surely, she would be able to save Nepgear's Lily Rank this day!

Nepgear's relief, incredible and even exhaustingly wonderful as it was, at being rescued by an interruption only lasted a moment, sadly.

For Peashy wasn't alone when she entered the room. She wasn't alone at all. In Peashy's hand, rather than a fresh box of crayons, was another hand instead. A hand in a black glove. The hand of Rei, otherwise known (at least to Peashy) as "mama."

Needless to say, what should have been a joyous scene of freedom and salvation from Lily Ranking with Plutia any more than absolutely necessary or required turned into something much more awkward. At least it was probably better than what Plutia wanted to do with her... depending on Plutia's mood, anyway...

Alas, Nepgear wasn't given any more time than that brief moment to reflect. The two who had just entered were about to have their say. While she stared in shock, her face quickly turning an increasingly deep shade of red, Plutia simply chose to lazily push Nepgear onto the couch, gently resting her head atop Nepgear's chest and looking for the world like she was moments from falling asleep with a favorite pillow.

All things considered? If Plutia had just done _this_, Nepgear probably wouldn't have been too bothered (after the first two minutes spent expecting Plutia to do something more only to realize she had fallen asleep _four_ minutes prior). Too bad this probably wasn't at all what she had had in mind after that all too detailed description Nepgear had given her about her time bonding with Peashy...

"Ploot! What are you doing!? I want to play too! You're hogging heeeerrrr...!"

"Eeeee! Peashy, stop, cover your eyes! Y-Y-You're too young for 'play' like that! _I'm_ too young for it!"

"_Maaamaaaaaa_, stoooop...!"

As Nepgear watched the blue haired woman struggle to cover Peashy's eyes from the indecent act she assumed she had walked in on (but in fact may have prevented by doing so), she realized that any moment now, knowing Peashy... She tried to get up and do something, but with Plutia (who seemed to really have actually fallen asleep at this point — how did she do that?) clinging to her, she wouldn't make it in time before the little CPU-

"YAH!" Look at that precise elbow maneuvering! But will it take effect...?!

"(unintelligble noise of pain)!?" _OHHHH_! It's a one hit wonder! They're outta here!

Thankfully(?), the noise woke Plutia up, which was all Nepgear needed to be able to get out from underneath her to go check on the blue haired woman crumpling to the floor. Peashy _had_ seemed miffed that Plutia was trying to play with Nepgear without her, but since that "game" had ended, it appeared as though she wasn't bothered anymore. As for her "mama," though?

"Eeeeeeee... T-That was..." She actually seemed a lot better off than Nepgear would have expected. Maybe she had just been surprised before? The Candidate supposed that just might have been surprise for the sake of a joke earlier, rather than actual pain. Or at least she could tell herself that so she could feel less bad about not being to stop it from happening, anyway. Considering the person in question... She supposed she just shouldn't question these things.

"Are you okay?" Nepgear offered Rei a concerned smile, tilting her head slightly as she tried to help the taller woman up. The blue haired member of the Seven Sages gladly took Nepgear's assistance, and in no time at all the two were right again. "There we go... Good as new, more or less. So, um..." Realizing she probably had a very limited window of opportunity to change the subject before it returned to where it had been previously, Nepgear took this chance to strike up conversation. "Peashy told you about the remake coming up?"

The bespectacled woman seemed taken aback by the Candidate showing interest in her opinion in such a manner, but it soon turned to gratitude as she began considering the girl's question... which was actually somewhat surprising, considering Rei's particular role, or role to be, in the game in question.

"She did! I just know it's going to boost m-my p-p-popularity a little... It'll highlight my plot too..." The woman puffed her chest out somewhat, an excited, nervous sort of smirk on her face as her glasses slipped down her nose just a little. "I mean, if you think about it, isn't Tari the nation that needs someone to save it the most? S-S-So... Maybe someone w-w-will marry... me?"

Surprise didn't quite cover how Nepgear felt hearing that kind of comment out of, well, _Rei_. Perhaps she hadn't ever expected to hear her once-enemy express an interest in something like that... or maybe it offended her that she dared suggest she wanted screentime when _she_, the main character's adorable little sister, _still_ barely had had any — though even Plutia seemed somewhat surprised by Rei's comment, and this was Plutia. So maybe there really was more to it than that...

However, no one was more taken by the comment that little Peashy.

"What?" Seeing the reactions she was getting, Rei nervously flitted her gaze back and forth around the room, panic clearly starting to rise. At least that was a more typical response to see from the blue haired woman, but the "damage," so to speak, had already been done. There was no going back for her now. "Can't I get m-m-m-married too? I-I wouldn't do anything bad to them, h-hones-"

"What about papa?"

With that one simple, innocent question, Rei froze mid-sentence. A pin dropping would have sounded like an explosion in that atmosphere. All three CPUs slowly turned to look at the little blonde, who was looking up at Rei with wide, questioning eyes. _Confused_ eyes.

She didn't understand.

She understood that _papa_ could get weird and talk about Neptuna's wife like he did, but... That was different because he still had always stayed with mama, right?

But...

She didn't understand at all!

"H-Hold on, Peashy, I think... I-I think you might be misunderstanding something here..."

Instinctively, Nepgear took a step away from Rei as she started to try to explain herself to the little girl before her. Even though that meant taking a step towards _Plutia_, in this case, she actually felt that she might be better off in the hands of Iris Heart than near Peashy right now, if for entirely different reasons anyway.

"Y... Y..."

There it was. The trembling lip. The frown.

The CPU Candidate was immediately glad she had moved.

"You can't do that mama! You can't can't can't do that! I won't let you!"

"Eh!? B-But I... W-Wh-"

"Yooou caaaaaan't!"

Sighing in relief at having avoided getting involved, Nepgear found herself returning to the couch as she watched the strange pair try to sort out this... peculiar familial issue. At least no one had ever tried to deal with the custody of Peashy before, now that she was a CPU and completely aware of herself again... How many parents was she on now? A dozen, maybe? One would think she would just start declaring aunts and uncles at some point...

"It's funny, isn't it Neppy Jr.?" The Candidate glanced to her side as Plutia, who had followed her back to the couch, spoke to her, unsure of what the CPU was talking about. She supposed Rei and Peashy's conversation _was_ kind of funny in a way, but given how her last conversation with Plutia had gone in this scene, she wasn't about to assume anything about what the light haired girl might be talking about. Who knew what kind of things Plutia would try to pull on her — maybe even literally — this time...!? "Heeheehee, don't be silly, I just wanted to talk... Is that so bad? You have such a naughty mind."

O-Oh. Shoot. She forgot they were in a Special Stage. She really had to keep better track of these things...

Blushing, Nepgear lowered her gaze. Could anyone blame her for thinking like that though? When it came to Plutia... I-It just came with the territory, that was all!

"Like it came with how you were talking about Peashy's transformation a little while ago...? Ohhh, or that beach scene in the anime...? Neither of those were _me_..." Nepgear's blush deepened, but she couldn't comment... N-Not because Plutia was right or anything, o-of course not, but just because... I-It was Plutia! That was all! "Hahaha... That's cute. You're so funny, Nepgear."

"W-W-Well if I'm wrong, then why don't you tell me what you _really_ meant!?" Nepgear cried out, arms outstretched and clearly flustered by Plutia's teasing. If Plutia hadn't been telling the truth about what she was saying and Nepgear was right, then how could she judge Nepgear for... F-For things that weren't even true anyway!? Y-Yes, that's right!

Plutia tilted her head, blinking slowly as her long hair drooped over her shoulder. For a moment, Nepgear had half a mind to think that Plutia had just forgotten what they had even been talking about — or that she knew full well but was going to claim she had forgotten just to spite and/or tease Nepgear, which was definitely just as likely a possibility.

"I was just thinking... The series only got regular games before, but then it started stretching out, riiiiight...? It got a spinoff here, a remake there, and it got sooooo stretchy..." To illustrate her point, Plutia stretched both of her arms out to her sides and made a great effort to look like she was stretching as hard as she could. Her eyes were closed tight and one look at her face might trick a person into thinking she really was using a great deal of energy... but one look at her hands would make that person wonder how this person got out of bed in the morning if a stretch like this made them make a face like that.

The whoosh of air she let out as she dropped her hands didn't help.

"I suppose..." Nepgear touched her chin, a thoughtful expression crossing her face — somehow able to completely ignore the scene that continued to go on before her between Rei and Peashy, which was quickly turning into something even stranger than it had started off ("What's an allowance anyway...!?" "Eeeeeee... A-Ask him! Ask him! He always kept the money! I never kneeeew!"). "What's funny about that? Isn't that a good thing?"

Plutia raised her head (w-was she actually panting? had that meager stretch really been a lot of work for her...?!) and nodded at Nepgear.

"It is! That's what's funny about it, Neppy Jr..." Without any warning at all, Plutia proceeded to lean over the side of the couch and pull out a pair of stuffed toys — they were Neptune and Noire, but dressed in a certain type of clothes that Nepgear knew had no place being described to anyone anywhere for any reason ever. ... W-Was it okay she kind of wanted the Neptune one...? "Look at these... I would neeeeever ever _ever_ make anything like this in the real story, but for a joke here? It's okay. Toootally okay. Even if poor little Neppy is going to be veeeery cold like this..."

"Right..." Nepgear nodded slowly. Plutia was probably getting at something, but she was transfixed by the items in Plutia's hands — the one resembling her sister, her sister in such... such attire anyway, if it could even be called that. N-Neptune would _never_ wear anything like that... Not even for Noire! Never! Never never never! Just thinking about the real Neptune wearing something like that... Imagine if she transformed...! I-It would be... indecent! Yes, indecent, that's what it would be! Just... imagine it. How... terrible it would be. Quite... terrible. Just awful... From head to toe awful... So awful...

Plutia giggled as she watched Nepgear's mind go on a ride. Maybe her example had been a little too much for the not-so-innocent girl to handle?

"Neeeeeeeeepgeeeeaaaar..." The CPU hated taking the girl out of what looked like such a fun train of thought, but she wanted to finish the conversation before it was time for her 3:00 nap, else she might end up being late to her 5:00 one, which would just _completely_ ruin her plans for her 8:00 one! With that in mind, she shifted one doll to the other so both were under one arm and slowly placed a hand on Nepgear's shoulder. "_Listen_ to me..."

"Huh?" The rosy cheeked Candidate blinked a few times before quickly shaking her head furiously in the hopes that Plutia hadn't caught on. "W-What were you saying, Plutia?"

"I was _saying_, isn't it funny that we're ending up like that now too?" Plutia hadn't actually come out and said as much yet, but it was what she had been leading up to. Getting right to the chase might help Nepgear recover in time for Plutia to _maybe_ ask Nepgear to join her for that nap... She missed when Neppy would always be around for that... "Think about it. It's fun, right?"

The girl considered it, admittedly still recovering from the "damage" seeing Plutia's new Neptune doll had "inflicted" on her mind.

She supposed Plutia had a point. They were already _in_ one such spinoff right now, weren't they? With another, one tied to the main story, already having long since been underway... It certainly did seem like they were expanding similarly, and around the same time too! Nepgear wasn't sure if it was funny or just downright scary. If it was the latter, it would make sense that Plutia believed it to be the former, though.

"I'll say it's... interesting." Finally deciding on this course of action, Nepgear nodded to herself and to Plutia. If nothing else, she was getting to appear more thanks to these things, so she certainly couldn't complain even if these Special Stages weren't directly tied to the main story. She wondered if she would get to appear in any of the short stories that were on the way...? "Maybe a little funny."

That seemed to satisfy Plutia enough, for she turned away from Nepgear and leaned into the couch. The Candidate closed her eyes and sighed. This day was turning out to be strange... But she was glad too. Plutia seemed happy enough, and despite their peculiar argument (was it even one anymore), Peashy and Rei seemed happy enough too... She was glad she had gotten to be the one to deliver the news to them. Maybe she could go with Plutia someday to see that new girl when it was her turn?

That would be pretty fun...

For a little, Nepgear entertained herself with what kind of things she could look forward to from the new friends that were sure to come someday... But something started to nag at her. At first she ignored it, but the more time passed, the more she realized that any moment now, the scene would have ended and she would have missed her one opportunity... Since this was a Special Stage... Asking here wouldn't hurt, would it?

The girl opened her eyes.

She was going to do it.

She just... had to figure out how.

After a moment, Nepgear glanced at the wall. She took a breath. If she was going to ask... She needed to do it before the scene ended. She just... She just had to steel herself.

"P-P-Plutia?"

"Hmmm?" The curious CPU watched the Candidate before her, who seemed to be having trouble getting the words out. Just... what words did she want to get out, though? She wasn't a _mind reader_, silly Nepgear! And Nepgear wasn't even narrating what she wanted to saaaay...

"C-Can I... Ummm... T-That is, I just..."

Plutia stared for a moment at the blushing, fidgeting form of Nepgear before her, before her eyes lit up in mischievous delight as Nepgear's intentions became perfectly clear to her. She didn't any narration to figure out what Nepgear wanted from that. Bending over for just a moment, she picked up the disgarded Neptune plush doll, stood back up, and happily offered it to Nepgear, who, after making sure Peashy and Rei were still occupied, quickly took it, locking it in a vice-like grip in her arms.

"Here you go. Enjoy her..." All smiles, as if she were looking at a happy customer rather than a girl who was possessively holding a doll of her sister, Plutia almost seemed like she had known Nepgear wanted it all along. That... That wasn't how it was... She didn't... She _wasn't_...!

What she _was_ was clinging to that doll like it was a precious artifact she needed to smuggle out of a dungeon without getting hit or noticed by anyone, and she didn't even have so much as a cardboard box to save her here.

"W-What the goodness!? I-It's not like that, Plutia! I-I just-! E-Enjoy? _Her_? I...! I'm not-!"

"IIII knooooow."

"Yoooou doooo nooooot!"


	26. ReProposal? Murder? Jiggling? Oh my!

"Plot device this, plot device that... I can't believe this... How could we have forgotten? How could _I_ have forgotten?"

A single cheek puffed out in some sort of emotion, perhaps frustration, or maybe just disappointment, Marvelous A! Q! L! finally stopped pacing around the room and settled into a seat, sighing and paying no mind to the usual obligatory bounce that followed the most basic movements from her.

First she found out she was still apparently called AQL in the remake, or at least its translation, making her correcting her name in her last appearance just seem _strange_, and then, upon looking over one of the previous new Special Stages, she came upon a startling discovery... Or rather, a _re_discovery — a _re;_discovery, even! One that changed everything about the first one!

She _hadn't_ had just that one scene that Cave's flashback derived from at all! She had had a scene _directly interacting with Neptune and Noire_ during their first date, and everyone had completely forgotten about it! She had been partially responsible for "Nep Black" even being a thing in the first place!

"This almost feels worse than just being a plot device. At least that had been memorable enough to be worthy of a scene in the anniversary..." The busty girl sighed, earning another accentuated bounce from her famous assets as she did. Considering this, the shinobi perked up somewhat, a half-hearted sort of smile forming. "If anything, being so forgettable was lucky, huh? Maybe I should learn a memory wiping technique or something like that...? I bet Nisa and RED would love to make their first appearances over and over again."

The redhead shook her head, laughing at her silly attempt at humor. Poor Neptune didn't need any more things interfering with her memory as it was, much less from any of her friends, even if the Neptune she knew in this story was... relatively fine as far as her memory went.

"Still... What if... You know?" The girl kicked her legs in the air absentmindedly, a fresh bouncy bounce coming with each precise, fluid movement of each one of her legs. Paying no mind to such random fiction physics, the the shinobi raised an eyebrow and turned her gaze skyward as she began to think.

It was a crazy idea, she had to admit, especially considering the status of the story as it was now... But wouldn't it be for the best? Think of all the unchanged typos and things that could be elaborated on...! Nothing would _change_, just... get a little touching up, that was all.

"Maybe we should have a Re;Proposal too?" Marvelous L!Q?A. finally offered to no one in particular, tilting her head and looking just a little bit hopeful, an especially bouncy bounce following the tilt of her head. "Just a few edits here and there, maybe an extra bonus scene for some extra character development... Yeah! Nothing would have to really change, right? It might even be fun to go over old ground! Like training!"

It was at this moment that Neptune entered the scene. Blatantly Obvious Convenience were her middle names, after all, and she had a very good reason for seeking out good old Marvelous !LAQ! anyway. A rather _sharp_ reason at that.

"Heyyyy, Marvy, you ninja types are good with sushi, right? 'Cause I maaaaay have this really big fish I need 'taken care of' if you know what I..." A sheepish look on her face that would put even actual sheep to shame, the ever adorable CPU of Planeptune waltzed through the door to the room Marvylous QQL? was having her solo scene in. Upon glancing at the dialogue and narrative that had been flowing before her entry, however, thoughts of hiring Marvelous AOL to assassinate her new pet shark quickly flew from her mind. "Hold on a second! Stop, stop! What's this about a Re;Proposal I'm seeing in here!?"

Marvelous AAA jumped up in surprise, the following bounces so bold that a lesser person might have been knocked over as though they were in the midst of an earthquake.

"N-Neptune! I didn't know you were coming!" Smiling brightly now that she was over her surprise — it did a person in her profession no good to be taken by surprise for long — the redhead bounded over to the CPU, each step she made creating a bounce like no other. As she made her way over to Neptune, even the happily married CPU couldn't help but be drawn in by the hypnotic effects of the highly advanced physics engine Marvelous DDD used... "Um... Neptune?"

The CPU shook her head and looked back at the shinobi girl's face, unable to quite meet the girl's eyes. She might just be in trouble if Noire ever happened upon the recording for this scene... Or worse... If she actually appeared in it! After all the worrying she had done about her body... Oh, Marvy's bouncing again... Like a pendulum... Look at them go...

"Helloooooo?"

Shaking her head once more, Neptune coughed into her hand and looked at the wall. Video games were really getting advanced, weren't they? Just imagine the next kind of crazy innovation they'd come up with after the miracle of those things!

_And speaking of crazy things like miracles...!_

"Right! What was that you were saying before!?" Spinning around on her heel, Neptune did her best imitation of one of Blanc's leading characters and pointed dramatically at Marvelous FFF. Sadly, no exciting looking text box followed her amazing finger gesture, much to Neptune's great disappointment. She really figured after that other scene one would have too... "It wasn't about a remake of Part 1... _Was it?_"

The shinobi blinked. What was with the theatrics? Would it be such a problem if it was?

"It might have been..." She was confused. Wasn't that a good thing? After all of this remake talk, even a little remaking of their own origin here and there couldn't be that bad, could it? "Why? I didn't mean a whole new story like the first remake, though that _would_ be fun, just a touchup like your sister's and Plutia's is all. Doesn't that sound exciting?"

For some reason, from Neptune's expression... She didn't seem to agree with Marvelous .!?'s suggestion.

"Let's think... Go back and make the story everyone knows look nicer, _but_ make them rewatch it all to see every minor new thing... _or_ do actual new stuff and _maybe_ finish the story we're trying to tell now?" Neptune placed a hand on her hip and held out her other hand expectantly, in a "pay up" sort of posture. Given this and the point Neptune was making, even the strong willed shinobi before her had to give in... dropping her head to her chest and her arms to her side, creating a brief bounce in their wake as she did so. "I thought so! I mean, we've still got one more teeny tiny set of _these_ things after this bit almost done before we can start dropping those short stories!"

Hearing that, Marvelous AlwaysQuiteLively perked up — in more ways than one.

"There's more coming? At this rate, we'll have enough Special Stages cleared for you to be Super Neptune in no time!"

Neptune nodded, appreciating the reference, though this time, her sheepish grin from before started to return in place of the more teasing, confident one she had been wearing just a moment prior.

"Uh... Yeah..." Looking rather shifty eyed, Neptune glanced for the door warily, as if she was suddenly worried about something happening. Shrugging it off, the CPU returned her gaze to her ever buoyant friend. "Well, these next ones were _actually_ s'posed to be in the anniversary thing, which was supposed to be part of the main story if you remember, but it was like spinoffception there! It went from one scene to two and before we knew it it got so big it got booted out as an idea for a rainy day that we ended up filming on the side of the short stories that are on the way, and now here we are!"

A bead of sweat ran down Marvelous ?'s neck as she offered Neptune a sheepish looking smile of her own.

"That's... a little confusing, isn't it? Actually, maybe a liiiittle bit more than that. Even my idea to touch up Part 1 is a lot less confusing then all of the stuff you're talking about..." Shaking her head, the rest of her (or at least the rest of her where Neptune was probably looking) shaking along with her, Marvelous ! held up a hand and began counting off what was supposedly on the way with her fingers. "So let's see... There's Part 3... A few more Special Stages... A new story for short stories... And who knows what else down the road! Neptune, I'm getting a little worried here... Are you going to be okay?"

Despite her own similarly concerned expression, Neptune waved a dismissive hand at the busty girl before her. She was the main character, darn it! If she couldn't be confident that everything they were planning was going to work out and be awesome, even if it meant a bajilliontylevenandten thousand years of work to make it all happen, then who would? It was her sacred duty to fulfill, right after gathering the Quadforce of Pudding and all eight Neponium Emeralds in order to stop the evil Dr. Wily Coyote!

"Don't you worry about anything! It's all probably maybe hopefully completely under control!" To prove her point to the shinobi, Neptune offered a thumbs up and a grin that she hoped was actually confident looking now. "Like I said, just a couple more Special Stages, and unless any other awesomesauce things need to get spoofed here, it's all 'real' stuff from here on out! Which means sucky waiting and load times until everything is up and running and raring to go... I think. I mean, you should probably ask MAGES. since she's probably better at telling the future than I am, but-"

Marvelous WEK (Who Even Knows) shook her head, a light bounce accompanying her, as she smiled cheerfully at Neptune. She did certainly feel better... even if she still thought a revisit to certain things about Part 1 might be in order... _Someday_, at least. _Maybe_.

Oh well, enough about that. She had gotten a whole scene for herself and Neptune up to this point! She couldn't complain about her idea, great as she thought it was, getting shot down. There was no way she could waste it any longer going over silly meta things like this when she could be having fun with her friend instead.

"So what was it you were coming to see me about anyway? Something about sushi?"

Neptune blinked... then her mouth went wide, followed by another dramatic point as she started hopping up and down.

"Oh yeah! I need you to murder someone for me!"

"W... What!?" This time, the shinobi was really taken off guard. She had been through plenty of strange situations with Neptune before, but this was just... Really out there. It wasn't like she'd never gotten requests like that before, but from Neptune? Maybe she had heard wrong? After all, what did _murder_ after to do with _sushi_? "Ummmm... Can you try that again, Neptune? I don't think I..."

Neptune shook her head, a sad, overdramatic look sweeping over her features.

"You see Marvy, dear _sweet_ Marvy, there's this shark, y'see, and it's _invading_ Planeptune. Came outta nowhere! First it brainwashed some poor NPCs to build it a fortress outside our Basilicom just for it, and then, wait 'til you get a load of this, the NPCs finished early but had been paid for the day, so it made them make a big pool of pudding just to get Noire mad at me... Can you believe it?! This thing is pure _evil_! So that's why I need you to come help me so I can..."

... And thus began the epic tale of Nep Ran Kagura Over: Shinobi Versus Shark.

There were no survivors.


	27. Crackombo Zone Act 1: Hot and Cold

For the first time in her life, Noire actually wanted to talk to herself — that is to say that she honest to goodness _wanted_ to talk to the "her" from Neptune's dimension. The girl, the "her," that she had pointedly avoided for so long... Strangely enough? She wanted it. She wanted it really badly. Some might say that such a desire was unlike her, but right now, she didn't care what was or was not "like" her. She just... really, really needed this. There was nowhere else she knew that she could go, and that was saying something, because she happened to know a lot. She prided herself in that.

But why? What had happened? What had caused such a change in heart in the proud CPU? What could have possibly forced the awkward girl's hand?

Looking at the past few hours...

It was easy enough to guess.

Plutia had turned her down... No, that wasn't just it.

She should have known she wouldn't be as lucky as her other self. How could she have ever assumed that?

It wasn't just that Plutia had turned her down. That hadn't even been an option.

Blanc had already gotten to her.

That was all there was to it.

Blanc had "won."

Noire felt somewhat guilty thinking about the other CPU in such a way, but when it came down to it, they had always had sparks between them. Blanc "winning the Plutia" just set everything ablaze... and then promptly put it all out. After all, what in the world could she do about it now? She couldn't very well challenge Blanc over Plutia like Planeptune's CPU was a _prize_. Plutia would just think even less of her, and her doing that would be a victory for Blanc more than anything, wouldn't it?

She had to face the facts, harsh as they were.

She had lost her chance. Perhaps... She hadn't had one in the first place?

She couldn't be sure. She didn't want to think about it.

All Noire was sure about, all she knew, was that happiness that she had observed on her other self's face that day seemed out of her grasp forever now.

Why she thought her other self might be a source of comfort was beyond her. If she thought about her, her other self probably had no idea how to help her. That Noire was happily married, wasn't she? Her happiness had been Noire's driving force, the inspiration that had pushed her to talk to Plutia in the first place. If anything, Noire should try to find someone in the other world who cared about Neptune or Noire like she did Plutia and seek them out... But there wasn't anyone like that, was there?

One might assume this was where this tale takes the obvious turn, in which Noire discovers something in the other dimension's Blanc... For after all, did she not share the same feelings, the same situation, as that other CPU? Well, as far as this Special Stage is concerned at least, they certainly did share a common thread between them like that.

But that would just be too easy, now wouldn't it?

Noire found herself still traveling to the other world's Lastation, as she had intended, even though her reasons for going felt flimsier and flimsier the closer she got. She had only been here a few times, and she would be lying if she claimed those instances were the most pleasant of experiences. Interactions with her counterpart of this world were just... awkward. Forced. Uncomfortable.

Perhaps she could seek out Uni instead and just... run away...?

No! Running away was what got her into this mess! If she hadn't run away... Maybe then...

"It doesn't matter now." She reminded herself bitterly, eyes downcast as she surveyed the layout of the Basilicom she was approaching. "It's too late."

It was weird how she could see the little differences between herself and this world's her in things like this. The architecture of their Basilicom was an obvious thing that Noire couldn't help but notice... Despite the fact that Noire's was a little more old fashioned, this Noire was the one that was actually much older than she was. It was a strange...

Well, no matter. Now wasn't the time to be enjoying the view. Finally landing on what looked like an important looking balcony, Noire steeled herself. She knew the two Verts got together often enough, and even the two Blancs shared stories from time to time... She and her own counterpart, however, never had such moments of "sisterly" bonding. They had never had a heart to heart and never really had any real connection... T-They were the same person after all, right? Sort of...

At least they could both agree that that sort of thing would just be weird.

Maybe that would be a good place to start before she led into the real reason she was here...?

Taking a deep breath, Noire pushed open the doors and braced herself. Knowing herself as well as she did, she didn't expect the warmest of welcomes.

Oddly enough, she didn't get the greeting she expected — the greeting she probably would have given herself — at all. The office, an office that, despite the very obvious differences, still resembled her own tastes somewhat, was devoid of any Noire other than herself. In other words... She had apparently gotten herself all worked up for nothing. Not even Uni was around.

"What am I thinking? Goodness..." She shook her head, sighing as her nerves started to relax. "Just because she's not _here_ doesn't mean she's not here at _all_. She's probably just in another room or something, that's all. I-I'll just... find her and then we'll talk. That's what I'll do. If I could talk to Plutia, I can definitely talk to-"

"Looking for someone?"

"Kya!"

An unfamiliar voice interrupted Noire's monologue, and she jumped a good foot in the air in response. Spinning around to locate the source of the voice, the CPU found herself face to face with someone she didn't know at all.

"Good afternoon. You must be the Noire of the other dimension." The woman offered Noire a small, pleasant seeming smile. It was strangely unnerving — in no small thanks to the fact that Noire had absolutely no idea who she was talking to, or so she thought, but such was clearly not the case for the stranger who had appeared before her out of nowhere here. "It's good to finally put a face to a name... Though I suppose I had the face all along, didn't I? Hahaha. It really is uncanny..."

Despite the joke and even the laughter, the woman didn't seem all that amused. If anything, she seemed rather analytical. It was as though she was giving Noire an inspection of sorts. As the woman nodded to herself, though Noire had no idea what it could be for, the CPU vaguely remembered hearing about the "Oracles" that the CPUs in this world had. Uni had often mentioned her and her sister's during visits. If Noire's hunch was right, then, this person would have to be...

"And you're... Kei, right? Noire's 'Oracle'?"

The woman nodded, her cool expression seeming to relax somewhat... or maybe Noire just imagined it. It was hard to tell with this woman. If this was some kind of test, then had Noire passed it by knowing who she was? She certainly hoped so. She hated playing the part of the fool.

"Correct. I doubt anyone other than Uni would have ever had the chance or desire to mention me to you, though. Am I right?" As she nodded, Noire half-expected some kind of threatening "I trust everything she said was good?" line to follow that one, but it never came. Instead... She simply continued looking over Noire. Her scrutiny was beginning to make the CPU feel awkward. "I see. Yet you wanted to talk to Noire? Not Uni? I wouldn't have expected that from you, considering I've never seen you before until now. Has something happened?"

Noire could read between the lines enough to not need to push to know what Kei was implying. If Kei had never seen her before here, it meant the relationship between her version of Noire and the one standing before her wasn't particularly good, which in turn meant that Noire probably would only seek out her counterpart if it was serious... which, as it turned out, wasn't at all wrong. This woman was scarily perceptive.

"I-It's nothing like what you're thinking..." Noire hesitated. The woman was already raising an eyebrow — with good reason, after all. Noire certainly suspected that the Oracle suspected that the relationship between the two Noires was strained... And that Noire was here for something dire... How could she explain herself to this kind of person without humiliating herself? She wasn't even sure how she was going to be able to explain herself to, well, _herself_ yet! "I just... I just wanted to talk to her about something."

Kei didn't respond or even move for a moment, instead quietly observing Noire for what seemed like an eternity. Her sharp blue eyes gazed at Noire with a cool intensity that Noire realized she was not used to — she had only ever been exposed to the fiery passion of Plutia before today. This... This was... This was different.

She wasn't sure what to make of it.

_Ba-bump._

Instinctively looking away, Noire tossed a hand through her hair.

"W-What? Am I not allowed here? I _am_ technically a Lastation CPU too, you know." Noire hadn't meant for that to sound as standoffish as it had, but what was done was done. She couldn't take it back now.

To her surprise, the Oracle standing before her simply smirked. Again, Noire couldn't help but find a distinct contrast from the kind of thing she was normally used to. It radiated something, but it was still chilled — reserved. Nothing like the blaze that Iris Heart would unleash with her broad smiles.

_Ba-bump-ba-bump._

Noire rubbed her arm awkwardly, feeling actually somewhat chilled now. This was getting a bit ridiculous, wasn't it? Maybe she was just nervous... S-She wasn't a loner, though! Neptune wasn't right about all that! Was she?

"You definitely are like her..." The silver haired woman shook her head, smirk still playing on her lips, though now it seemed as though there was something more to it — amusement? W-Was Noire funny to her?! Why she oughta... "Would you care for some coffee? I was on my way down to the kitchen to have some when I overheard you arriving. Noire is out right now, but she's in Lastation today. It shouldn't be terribly long before she returns."

Noire cursed herself inwardly as Kei spoke. "Today"? That's right... She hadn't even considered that the other her might have been in Planeptune — with her _wife_! — when she had come here. She had been so wrapped up in everything that she had just come here straightaway... Imagine how foolish she would have looked if

"You shouldn't worry about it. She wouldn't be one to talk anyway if she said anything." Seemingly reading her mind, Kei chuckled lightly before heading towards the door. She looked behind her, her cool eyes gazing straight towards Noire — was she looking through her? The CPU wasn't sure. "Are you coming? I don't mind whatever you do, but I won't wait if you don't make up your mind."

_Ba-bump._

"R-Right, I heard you!"

Kei seemed to accept this answer, either because she was used to Noire — or _a_ Noire, anyway — or maybe because she just didn't get phased by answers like that. For some strange reason, while the former possibility just flat out bothered Noire (she was her own person, darn it, no matter how similar she was to the other one!)... The second option was kind of... exciting?

Why would someone _not caring_ excite her?

Logically speaking, Noire supposed as she followed after the Oracle down the Basilicom's halls, perhaps it was simply because she just wasn't used to being treated this way. Even the quiet Blanc, at least "her" Blanc, tended to argue with her a lot of the time. Rarely did she ever encounter anyone to just be so... So _dismissive_ of her!

_Ba-bump-ba-bump._

She could... She could respect that. All business. That was what _impressed_ Noire about this Kei person, not _excited_ her about her. She was just getting her wires crossed because of this Plutia mess, that was all. Finally seeing someone else who could be so... well, so like _this_, it was just comforting, that was all — comforting in how positively _not_ comforting she seemed, as it happened.

It made sense, really. After getting such a shock from Plutia, being faced with such a cooling situation... That was all there was to it. Noire could calm her nerves a little with this while she waited for her counterpart to arrive. It wasn't that big a deal. She was just thinking too much. If she wanted to make a good impression — and she was Noire, which meant she did — she couldn't very well let herself get so flustered like this over nothing, now could she? Especially not to such a dignified seeming woman like the one leading her through the main area of the Basilicom now.

"Uni tells me you CPUs were once human over there. Is that right?"

"H-Hm? Oh, yes, that's right."

"Interesting."

Noire found it more interesting that CPUs just sort of _were_ over here, but she didn't comment on it. For her, her having once been human was just normal for CPUs as far as she was concerned... But she supposed that was just how these things went. She did find a little bit of pride in the fact that she had managed to say something impressive, however small a feat of impressiveness it was, to the Oracle though. She had felt strangely off guard for the entirety of this encounter...

... And yet, as Noire followed after the short haired Oracle, the kitchen growing ever closer, she found her steps feeling strangely... _Lighter_...?

Even she was starting to doubt her half-assed excuse from earlier right now.

A terrifying thought crossed her mind.

It couldn't be _that_, though, could it?

After all... That was impossible.

Just because Neptune had often teased her about her "dangerous" tastes when it came to Plutia... That didn't mean... That didn't mean her tastes were dangerous in _general_, did it? That would be ridiculo-

"Would you like it black? Or with sugar?"

_Ba-bump-ba-bump-ba-bump!_

The CPU jumped at the sound of Kei's voice, her twintails jumping with her as though they were alive and reacting just as she was. The woman glanced at Noire, head tilted ever so slightly to the side, a questioning look on her seemingly stern face. Her piercing eyes, even without her saying it, even without her likely even _meaning_ it, made the CPU feel guilty, like she had done something wrong.

A sense of dread settled in upon the next realization.

Because... She realized... She might like that feeling.

Noire inhaled, a chill going down her spine like an electric shock, as she placed a hand on her chest in the hopes of slowing down her heart. Cool it, girl! Or... No, in this case, warm up, girl! Whatever hold this Oracle had on her, she couldn't let it get to her. She still had to talk to her counterpart and...

"Noire? Is something the matter? You haven't answered my question."

"W-Whatever you're having is fine!"

_Ba-bump-ba-bump-ba-bump-ba-bump-ba-bump!_

Noire lowered her hand from her chest, looking away from the woman dealing with the two mugs of coffee. Whether she held her hand there or not, it wasn't going to stop the pounding, and that's exactly what she felt inside. Her heart was pounding away, like...

Like when...

The image of a certain sadist flashed in her mind. With the image came a mixture of feelings, fiery and exciting and shamefully good and...

The black haired girl swallowed as she cast a glance back in Kei's direction.

The fire inside of her... cooled somewhat as she did so.

There was no question now.

She really _did_ have dangerous tastes...

* * *

><p>"So, you wanted to talk to me?"<p>

Somehow, Noire had managed to get through having coffee with Kei without breaking anything or running away. She had been set on running away _after_, almost positive she was losing her mind, when, wouldn't you know it, then her counterpart had finally chosen to show up. She wasn't sure if it had been perfect timing or absolutely horrid timing, but whatever it was, now Noire found herself alone with her mirror image in the CPU's office.

"T-That's right... You see, some things have been happening on my end and, ah..." Noire closed her eyes, her throat feeling strangely dry. She had thought she had been preparing herself all this time, getting herself ready to talk about Plutia, but now that the moment was here, her voice was cracking and her tongue felt like a desert in her mouth.

She... She could really go for a nice, cool drink right now. Why had she agreed to that coffee...!? What she really could go for was...

"I-I-Is..." As Noire thought that, she found herself speaking without realizing it. Rather than what she had wanted to talk about all along, instead...

Her counterpart across the room frowned, unsure of what was going on here. She had come home from getting Neptune a present (n-not that she was going to let this... copycat or Kei know that!) only to discover her Oracle and her clone getting along all... weirdly and now the other CPU wanted to talk to her alone? S-Seriously, give her a break!

"Yes? W-What is it? You're starting to creep me out, looking at me like that..."

Noire took a deep breath.

If she wanted to get over Plutia, she needed to jump out of the frying pan...

"_I-Is your Oracle single?!_"

... and into the freezer!


	28. Crackombo Zone Act 2: Good and Evil

It looked like it was the end of the road for her.

This was it.

The last tango in Planeptune.

The last showdown in Lowee.

The last episode of her three part special... even though it was technically only the second part of a three part special.

But for her, it was the last episode.

For her?

This was the finale.

"Sorry, but I'm not going to let you go. You've done a lot of bad things, and now that I finally have you here, I'm not about to let you go back to doing them again." Her captor looked at her with a passive expression, apparently neither guilty nor particularly excited about her catch. It was like catching her had been just part of the job or something like that. She would have been annoyed at how little value her freedom seemed have with the person if not for the fact that, well...

Linda... had been caught.

"Come on... I'll never do it again? You _know_ you can trust me." Linda tried offering the most apologetic look she could to the busty broad that had finally managed to take her down, but the so called "shinobi" paid her no mind.

"Sorry, no means no." Okay, there might have been a little sympathy that time, but not enough to make any headway here. Not as cold as Linda first thought, but then again, with knockers like those, it would be weird for her to be a cold type of character anyway. "Just you sit tight, okay? I promise the hard part is over now."

The small time villain watched as the girl before her turned away from her, maybe contacting authorities or doing her makeup or something else. Truthfully, Linda quite honestly didn't give a damn what she was doing, but now that she wasn't looking, at least Linda could let herself show a little emotion. A little _real_ emotion, that is.

And so she smiled.

It was funny. Seriously, it was hilarious. She wasn't actually all that torn up about this. Not even close. Fact of the matter was, this had gone just as she had planned it, not the stupid bouncing bimbo in front of her. Yeah yeah yeah, that totally sounds like an excuse, but she was legit this time. She had gone into things this time planning on getting caught from the onset of it all.

Why? Sounded pretty idiotic, right?

Well, see, she'd been thinking.

She had this all wrong.

Why bother with a life of crime or whatever you wanted to call being a minor villain in this crazy ass series when there was _such_ an easy alternative sitting right before her very eyes? The whole story was based off the idea! She couldn't believe she'd been so _stupid_ to not realize it! She couldn't believe no one else had thought of it before her! Was it because she was the only villain around with half a brain? Was that it? Well, whatever it was, she was going to make sure it worked before any of those bozos in the other dimension could rip off her great idea.

"So... What're you gonna do with me anyway?" Linda put on her best 'oh woe is me' voice for this next line. The next stage was key, after all. If she screwed this part of things up, then she'd be up shit's creek without so much as a paddle or even a boat to help her out. "You're not gonna k-k-kill me... Riiiiight?"

She was playing up the pathetic angle just a bit too — no, she was _not_ normally pathetic, thank you very much — just so it seemed all the more authentic. She didn't try for any puppy dog eyes though, that kind of BS would just get her called out faster than a blue hedgehog at a hotdog convention. She wanted this to look _real_, dang it!

The well endowed ninja girl glanced behind her, looking at Linda with sympathetic eyes. For a moment, Linda almost felt worried. This wasn't like the usual bimbo patrol she normally dealt with — ninjas _were_ assassiny types, right? What if... What if she _was_ on the chopping block here...?! If that was the case, then she might've just walked into the worst possible situation ever!

Ironically, those fears allowed the expression on Linda's face to look that much more genuine, and at just the perfect time too. The redheaded shinobi was looking her way just as those thoughts crossed Linda's mind... And so while Linda was starting to worry her safety might actually be at risk...

"You've been through a lot, haven't you?" The girl's red eyes seemed to soften, her oddly shaped pupils trained on Linda for a moment before she turned around once again. "Don't you worry about a thing. I'm sure you have your reasons, but that doesn't matter anymore. It's going to be all behind us now, you'll see."

Linda's jaw fell open as she heard these words, her eyes nearly bulging out of their sockets.

Oh... Oh... Oh _shiiiiiit_! It was actually working! Was this seriously happening!? _Seriously_!? She was in business after all!

Her fool-proof plan really was going to go off without a hitch if she played this right! It was already basically there from the looks of this! No more petty crime for her, no ma'am!

"What makes you so sure? Huh?" Linda added a little edge back into her voice now. It was time for her to act like her captor's words were too good to be true — like all she knew was a life of crime or some cliche crap like that. Linda could already see from the way the girl's back straightened that she must have been imagining what kind of harships Linda regularly went through...

As if!

See, this was it. What she had realized was that all she had to do was get some dopey hero type — and in Gamindustri, she had her pick of the litter when it came to dopey heroes — to catch her in the act and decide to "reform" her instead of punishing her. It happened all the time on TV, right? After the "reforming," a Las Nepas wedding later, and she'd be living the easy life for the rest of her days while the sap of a "hero" that she snagged would bring the bread home for them from then on. Piece of cake!

It was already going perfectly for her. Sure, she'd ended up with a dopey hero that was actually somewhat unknown to her, but who cared? Considering this Special Stage was part of a series with the theme of weird ass combinations like her and... well, _anyone_, that just made her even more confident that this was all going to work out in her favor. She was gonna be set for _life_ after this!

"I know you can't trust me yet, but I promise, you will." Linda could practically _hear_ the smile in the other girl's voice. Oh man, what a total sucker! She couldn't believe her luck. She had thought it had been a disaster, losing that blue haired flatso like she had, but running into this walking pair of beach balls might have been even better than going with her first pick! Talk about a home run. "I know just what you need..."

Linda swallowed. This was the big moment. Even a crook like her could see a flag about to be triggered when it was being done as blatantly as this. The only question that remained was whether it was the flag she wanted or some other one — she was dealing with a dopey hero type, after all, and those losers _did_ tend to be pretty unpredictable...

"Halt! Stop right there!"

And speaking of unpredictable losers, if she didn't know better, she could even hear the voice of her original pick for this plan of hers. That'd just be stupid though, right? There was no way that that washboard that made _her_ look stacked would still be on her tail now that Lady Bounces-A-Lot had grabbed her.

In that moment, a blue haired heroine dramatically entered the scene. Her scarf billowed in the wind as she entered the clearing, taking a step towards the two girls she was intruding on. The "larger" of the two — the one that wasn't tied up on the ground — looked at the blue haired girl with a sense of familiarity, while Linda found herself starting to wonder if she had counted her blessings too soon.

Because as it turned out, life was pretty freaking stupid sometimes.

"Marvy! I never thought you would stoop as low as to conspire with someone as low as this fiend..." Linda wished she had a free hand, if only so she could slap her forehead upon hearing the speech the newcomer was starting. It was plain as day that she was hardly conspiring with the broad that had captured her, and even this lunatic had to see that much. Did she _have_ to go through the motions like this every time?

Well... That kind of attitude _was_ what had initially led Linda to choosing her for her plan before it had been railroaded... She'd be so damn easy to manipulate, after all!

"Hmm? I'm not conspiring with her. I captured her — she's nothing more than my prisoner right now." Linda grit her teeth upon hearing the simple, uncaring response of the boob ninja. Nothing more than her prisoner!? They were supposed to shack up, and she was supposed to be living the easy life! Had she overestimated her acting abilities...!? "What brought this on? I thought you knew me better than that, Nisa."

Wait a second... These two knew each other?

Could it be... _that_?

Before Linda could consider this new development further, the justice maniac thrust a finger forward to dramatically point at her fellow "hero" as though she had just committed some kind of crime. This was getting pretty funny, now that it was turning out like this...!

"That's not true! I heard you two talking earlier!"

Linda blinked at this admission of Nisa's, somewhat impressed despite her current position. If this raving lunatic had been listening in to their conversation prior to her entrance... Even she could _kind of_ see how that vigilante nutjob could get to a conclusion like that. Plus...

"So you were eavesdropping?" Despite herself, Linda couldn't help but smirk in the self-proclaimed hero's direction. After all, what kind of "hero" pulls shit like that? Hah! "Somebody's slipping."

As expected, the smaller of the two heroes turned on Linda, her cheeks tinged with a frustrated blush as she snapped at the villain. It wasn't that surprising — they had had this kind of dumb back and forth going on for a while now, hadn't they?

"Y... You... Silence! I'm going to be the one to bring you to justice!"

Inwardly, Linda burst into laughter. She's said it! She'd as good as said she wanted to "reform" Linda! Even if the first broad hadn't wanted to do it, here was someone practically begging to be her meal ticket for the rest of her life! And considering there was already someone here who seemed pretty eager to do it herself...

Then it _was_ that!

The flag she had triggered... It was way better than some stupid hero wins the villain over route.

These morons were going to _fight over her_!

She was about to be in the middle of a _love triangle_!

No matter which one of them lost, she won!

Linda had to admit it. She could deny it no longer.

She was a freaking genius.

"Hmmm? Do you two know each other?" So the talking tits had a brain in there. Didn't matter to Linda, though, because she was golden now. Heck, maybe she could get this one jealous? Now _that_ would be interesting to see. "I see... That explains it. I didn't realize I'd captured someone you have a history with." What the hell was with that bounce!? She was barely moving! "Don't you worry, Nisa! We're not conspiring at all. I'd never stray from my path, just like you and yours."

The bound girl blinked as she watched the blue haired girl take in the redhead's words.

Something suddenly seemed off about this...

"D... D..." Ohhh, look! For a so called "hero of justice," she was _trembling_ she was so angry! Linda had to do everything she could not to burst out laughing as she watched the sap she intended to take for a ride do her best to contain herself. Any second now, the lunatic was surely about to start yelling at the living flotation device about justice or some other crap like that, Linda just knew it. "_Damn you, villain_!"

Except she was pointing at Linda.

Marvy had the decency to jump in surprise, at least, but at this point, Linda was just starting to feel lost. Like the flag she was sure had just been waving around before her only moments ago... wasn't there anymore.

"Huh?"

"You... You made me question the integrity of a fellow hero!" Making overblown gestures of sorrow, the girl with the scarf bigger than she was clenched her fists, her teeth clenched in some kind of ridiculous, righteous fury, like she could barely contain her anger at herself and the "evil" person before her. "Even if she's... a little... like _that_, I know, in my heart of hearts, that Marvy would never betray the spirit of goodness inside of her! But to think, because I misunderstood... I almost made a terrible mistake! I'm unforgivable!"

Naturally, the little "like that" Nisa was referring to — and doing her best to avoid looking at — was about as far from "little" as it could be. What's more, Linda _still_ didn't have a single damn clue as to where things were headed now that they were going like this. Why weren't they talking about how badly they wanted to reform her like they were supposed to?

"Huh?"

"Ni~sa! Don't say that." Bounding right on over to the whining washboard, the pair of of watermelons on legs grasped the other girl's hands and smiled . "It's just like you said, you misunderstood. I'm not bothered. I'm glad I have a friend who cares enough about my morals to get upset on their behalf like this."

"Huh?"

"I-It's not like that-! And keep those things away from me! You're just rubbing it in..." Some might say Marvy was doing a lot more than rubbing it in given the sudden proximity the two heroes now shared, but oddly enough, Nisa didn't seem as perturbed by her comrade's "DLC" as her words might imply — after all, large, extra large, or so large she broke the scale, Marvy was still a fellow heroine of justice! I-If her chest had to be so offensively large, then it must have been that way to keep in her heroic spirit...!

Seeing this all taking place before her, slowly realizing her decreasing relevance to the narration, Linda looked from one of the girls she had hoped to turn her into a (rich, never-have-to-work-again) woman and then to the other.

"Huh...?"

"Rubbing what in? That I caught that girl before you had the chance to...?" Either oblivious to Nisa's true issues with her or swiftly dodging them, Marvy simply smiled brightly at her fellow do-gooder and gave her a gentle pat on the shoulder. "That's not important, is it? She's caught now."

The smaller girl before her seemed to consider this.

"Y-Yeah... Yeah! You're absolutely right!" After she was done with her consideration, the vigilante thrust a fist in the air, seemingly completely rejuvenated despite how close she was to those offending parts of Marvelous. Perhaps when they were a fellow hero's, it didn't bother her... as much? "All that matters is that justice is done! It doesn't matter whether it's you or me, so long as the swift hammer of goodness is brought down upon evil! Ha ha ha!"

If she hadn't been so dumbfounded at the moment, Linda probably would have thrown up in her mouth a little hearing that corny line come out of Nisa's mouth. Not that it mattered — it was starting to sound like she wasn't even being considered as a person as far as these two numbskulls were concerned.

"That's right!" As if the disgust that was just radiating off of her prisoner didn't even register to her, Marvy simply continued to look at her fellow freedom fighter with a fond look, a considerate expression crossing her features. "Oh, I know...! Why don't we take her in together and get something to eat afterwards? I'd love to catch up with you. Were you really visiting a school for demons?"

"... Huh...?"

"I was! Neptune told you, right? But I bet she didn't tell you that I met _the_ Prism Rangers in person!" Now looking completely restored to her normal, jubilant, heroic self, Nisa offered Marvy a victory pose of sorts before she continued. "He was a zombie when I met him, but I even got the very first Red's autograph! I'll show it to you at the restaurant — and as a heroine, and since you aren't Gust, I insist on treating, especially after how I messed up things for you earlier."

Totally unperturbed by Nisa casually dropping the fact that she had not only met a zombie, but gotten the autograph of said zombie into their conversation (just what the _hell_ did this ninja girl deal with on a regular basis to be okay with that kind of thing!?), the Marvelous formerly-and-maybe-even-currently-known-as AQL cheerfully accepted Nisa's offer, simply glad to have the misunderstanding out of the way and to be back in the other girl's good graces again.

"Then it's settled!"

"You bet it is! Now let's deal with _this_, then we'll be off!"

"Let's!"

As the two turned on her, looking at her less and less like a person should look at the object of their affections, Linda could only stare back at them as the horrible truth of this whole affair began to sink in.

"... H... Huh...?"

Wait just one freaking minute here... Were they telling her... Were they _seriously_ trying to tell her that the combination of characters that made up this Special Stage's unique pairing... The pairing that was to be the premise of this entry in the "Unique Pairing" Zone of Special Stages... The pairing that this entire premise — the pairing that the premise of _her letting herself get captured_ had been leading up to...

... didn't even _involve her_!?

"What gives!?"


	29. Crackombo Zone Boss - First Form

"I love you too."

The body in Neptune's arms slowly relaxed as soon as the words left Neptune's mouth. It was a natural, well practiced movement. The girl wondered briefly how many times they had gone through this routine and how many more times before they'd get it down just right. It didn't matter to her. She'd be willing to do it forever until they got it just right if she had to.

"I-I'm not going to say 'I know', if that's what you want from me..."

Neptune's grin turned to a smile, and then it widened. She didn't need the other girl in her arms to say any more than she already had. She knew they had gotten it right now for sure.

"I know."

Like that, the two held on to each other. They both knew it. They felt it.

Everything was going to be okay.

"And... cut! That's it girls! That was a perfect take!"

Neptune let out a sigh of relief at the director's words, rolling onto her side to allow the other actress on the bed some breathing room as various studio staff began rushing over to their sides with towels and water bottles and all sorts of things to cool off the hard working leading ladies — not to mention some clothes to change into before they got back to their dressing rooms. They'd been at this scene for hours, but now that they'd finally gotten it right, it was time for a well deserved rest.

At least for Neptune's co-star, anyway. The night was still young in her case.

For most, it was just another day in Filmindustri, but for Neptune, today marked much more the last day of filming for the second season of _The Proposal_. Despite that, she couldn't help but marvel over that fact though, even now that talks of a movie were in the works. She had just been a small time actress before she'd landed this part, always in the shadow of her two older sisters' — who coincidentally had landed smaller roles as her _younger_ sister and her alter ego in this show.

No, she didn't get it either.

As an intern offered Neptune a bottle of water, which she happily began guzzling down, she shot a brief look at the black haired girl who had been in her arms only a few moments ago. She was already off the bed, dressed, and looking like she was ready to hit the red carpet even though she probably needed to change just as much as Neptune from the quick stuff she'd just thrown on.

Still... Wow.

Noire was the star of the movie and television world right now. Neptune was still amazed that she'd landed the lead role of something alongside her. Pretty, popular, classy, and able to act out any role she pleased. To think she'd started out as a regular cosplayer — now she had movie directors lining up at her door every morning, starring in Filmindustri's highest rated show, and happily engaged to the woman of her dreams.

Neptune wasn't the jealous type, but if she were... Man! That was the professional kind of person she'd totally be aiming for being like... if she were the super motivated type, anyway. She supposed it was really her own fault for being a slacker for so long before she'd landed this gig, having only really been in commercials for game consoles (Nepata Tuneshiro _did_ have a pretty big following, in her defense!) before this.

She wasn't going to let it slip away from her now that she'd finally gotten it, though!

"Neptune? Did you hear me?" The purple haired actress blinked. Her co-star had been talking to her. Woops! Luckily she was an airhead anyway, otherwise she might've lost some points on that one. Neptune grinned sheepishly at the girl before her, who was already looking like she was thinking about what important thing she had to do in her life.

The reality of Noire's thoughts at the moment was far from what Neptune visioned, of course. She just wanted to get something to eat, then go home and take a nice, long bath to relax her muscles before her adorable fiance came home and tied up for a good portion of the rest of the evening... but Noire wasn't about to get into those boring details with Neptune.

"Uhhh, sorry! I was thinking about something." The black haired actress shook her head, sighing at this response — expected as it was. Neptune didn't take offense to it, like one might expect given their positions. It was funny, really, how Noire had started off so polite and professional when they had started working together, but now they seemed to be close enough that Noire was fine acting natural like this around her. Not that a bubblebrain like Neptune was different, mind, but that was because Neptune was like that with everyone... "What's up?"

"Sheesh... This is why you have trouble with your lines." Noire ran a hand through her hair, hopping off the bed and walking around it to face Neptune on her side head on. The purple haired girl rolled her eyes in response — sure, Neptune may have been scatterbrained, but even the pro before her had stumbled sometimes! She still had that blooper reel, thank you very much! "I wanted to know if you want to grab some dinner. Plutia's going to be late tonight, so I'm free."

Neptune quirked a brow. There was a time when she wouldn't have said anything, given the drastically different standings that existed between the two of them, but now...

"Could it be... you're feeling lonely, Noire!?"

... she just couldn't help it!

"T-That's not it at all! I've got lots of people around me! I don't need you for anything like that!" Neptune grinned cheekily at the response her tease had gotten. She was right on the money then. Noire narrowed her eyes at the smaller actress before her, knowing she was being toyed with... but also knowing unfortunately all too well that that was only possible because her co-star really _had_ gotten to know her well. She didn't dislike that... much. "Anyway, do you or don't you? I'm not going to ask again."

The purple haired girl considered pushing her luck and teasing some more, but she decided against it. Instead, her grin somehow managed to become even wider than it already was.

"No can do." She flashed her co-star a victory sign with her fingers. "I've got plans. Sorry, but you can't come."

Noire tilted her head as Neptune added that hasty clarification — was it a sign of the last traces of the fading respect (or whatever one could call this girl's equivalent of respect) that Neptune once showered her with during nearly every moment of filming the first season that Neptune had added that, or was it for Noire's sake that Neptune had added that, to stop her from asking if she could tag along and... W-Well, it wasn't like Noire _wanted_ to hang out with the girl or anything, she just...

The black haired actress sighed. She'd been beat. Neptune seemed happy enough, so she knew she shouldn't push it. She could find something else to do until Plutia got home.

"Okay, okay. Much as I hate to admit it, you've gotten a lot better at this." Noire offered the younger girl an affectionate look, like an upperclassman might offer a student that they had taken under their wing. Despite how their relationship had changed since they'd started working together, Neptune found herself swelling with pride seeing such a look from Noire directed at her. "Whatever it is you're up to, you've earned it. Go have fun before I decide to come with you whether you want me to or not, okay?"

Neptune beamed, before nodding brightly and dashing off towards her dressing room to get fixed up so she could head out.

Once she was gone, Noire let out a laugh, a wry smile on her face. She was a little disappointed, but she couldn't be too disappointed if she was facing that kind of expression. More importantly, that just meant she had extra time to get the ropes nice and ready for when Plutia got home... Maybe she could try getting herself ready to welcome Plutia home...?

"M-Miss Noire? Are you feeling ill? Your face is looking quite red, could it be you've got a fever-?"

"S-Shut up! I'm fine! I'll be in my dressing room!"

* * *

><p>While Noire was already heading home from the studio, Neptune hadn't actually gone that far from the set at all. She'd quickly dashed into one of the studio's showers after cleaning herself up in her dressing room, gotten dressed, argued with her sisters for a few minutes (her oldest one, the one that could be a supermodel if she wanted, had no right to tease her about this!), and finally set off towards her destination.<p>

It was weird. She had been really excited before, but now... Now she just felt nervous. Was that normal? It wasn't like the nervousness she'd felt taking this job and putting herself out there — a make or break gig that would change her career forever. This was something else. That kind of "nervousness" was exciting, and she was almost dull to it. Her oldest sister made fun of her for her inability to get too worried, but oddly enough... Here she was.

She was nervous. That was kind of like being worried, right?

It made sense, if she thought about it.

This time, it was personal.

"Oh, that sounds like I'm in an action movie." At least that thought took some of the edge off — it made her smile a little too. It didn't last, however, for her lonely trek still had a ways to go before she arrived at her destination.

And at long last, or maybe after no time at all, she realized she was standing outside of the door that she had had her mind set on approaching all day.

The door to the staff area.

It was where the writers, editors, special effects people, and other behind the scenes types typically hung out when they weren't working — or when they were even when they weren't supposed to be... well, most of the time, it was just a lounge for the writers to hang out.

It was the area where _she_ hung out.

The actress tugged on her collar, a sheepish grin on her face as she recalled how often she would find herself coming her to talk to these people in the early days of filming. It had been hard, but the writers

_one writer in particular_

had been more than willing to work with the up and coming starlet, even if they often got frustrated with her — she was glad for that. No respect like they showed Noire — when she messed up, they didn't hesitate to help her get it right. She was the kind of person that laughed off just about everything, even criticism, so that treatment was just fine for her.

Come the second season's filming, however... She didn't need to come here as often. She had gotten better — thanks to them

_thanks to her_

sticking with her for so long during the first season. She didn't stumble as much, things didn't need to get rewritten to accomadate her clumsiness... She was coming into her own and everyone could see it. So why was it that she had started to long for the days of her constant screwups? Why was it that she had started to miss her frequent trips here?

It was obvious, really.

Neptune, rising star of Filmindustri's hottest new show, current face of television everywhere...

... had gotten herself a _crush_ on one of her writers.

The potential for scandal was definitely there, but she was young and she didn't particularly care. She was selfish like that — and her confidence had gotten a huge boost thanks to the success of _The Proposal_ on TV. Her sisters had given her their blessings, and that had been all she needed to feel like the potential risk was worth it.

Now all she had to do...

Now all she had to do...

"Oh. This might be a problem."

The actress lowered her hand as it dawned on her. Despite the fact that she had been acting in the number one love story in the country for over a year now...

... she had no idea what to do when it came to her own potential love life!

She didn't have a clue!

She knew she had wanted to somehow leave here with the object of her affection to dinner, but... how? What was she supposed to say? What was she supposed to do? Why wasn't this as easy as it was on TV!? It was her doing it all!

Neptune sighed dramatically, a sheepish grin on her face. Her heart was pounding and her nervousness had somehow managed to triple thanks to this exciting new development — and still, here she was grinning stupidly at a door!

"It's too bad I can't just screw up and let her come to me. Real life doesn't work like it does on TV..." Grumbling to herself, Neptune kicked at the floor as she recalled how her character had lucked out, debating turning back and trying again another day. She had been working her nerve up all day for this moment, but maybe she had gotten herself too worked up. ... Wait, what was- "Oh."

In her attempt to vent, instead of just kicking the ground, she had just kicked the door open.

Her eyes met an all too familiar pair of blue ones.

She swallowed.

Should she consider this a stroke of luck or a disaster waiting to happen?

"H-Hiya Blanc! Whacha doin' here at this hour? Isn't everyone here supposed to be gone for the night?" She smiled awkwardly. She had known Blanc would be the only one here right now. She had planned this knowing that. She had been hoping for this exact thing to happen, in fact! The two of them had spent more than one evening here going over lines, and even rewriting the script just so on occasion to give Neptune a hand in her early days.

In other words, Neptune knew full well that Blanc stayed late. Considering that the writer narrowed her eyes in response to Neptune's words, apparently she wasn't falling for Neptune's feigned innocence.

"What do you want?" The quiet brunette cut right to the chase, shaking her head as she stepped back to allow Neptune entrance into the writer's lounge. Neptune offered the other girl a grin of thanks and took up this offer, already starting to feel more comfortable with their once normal routine starting to resume itself. She followed the girl in and settled down on a couch they had spent more than one night practicing things on. "You can't get a peek at next season's script yet if that's what you want. We're still working on it."

The purple haired girl tilted her head, blinking at the almost accusation. Was that what Blanc really thought she would want? Well, before Neptune could even think about her original objective of inviting the other girl out to dinner

_inviting her crush out on a date_

first she had to correct any confusion there was about how she was viewed! That should be easy enough, right? She was super friendly and likeable, after all! It wasn't like it had taken her years to get this job or anything, right...? It wasn't like she had been considering giving up and going into voice acting if this hadn't worked out or anything, right...?

"... Neptune? W-What's with that look?" Why did Blanc sound so concerned all of a sudden? Looking dejected as she recalled failed audition after failed audition, Neptune raised her head only to see a very surprising sight — the writer looking away and scratching one of her cheeks awkwardly. Maybe it was just the light, but that cheek looked a little redder than normal... "Stop it. I would show you if I had anything to show you, but I really don't. So... Don't look at me like that, okay? Knock it off."

Her heart skipped a beat seeing Blanc looking like that.

Nervousness slipped away and in its place, something else remained. Rather, perhaps it would be more accurate to say that something else _returned_.

Watching Blanc, Neptune just grinned. The good feelings she had been swimming in during filming earlier started to return. Seeing the writer looking so vulnerable... It was nice. It made her want to see more sides to her — more than just her quiet and angry sides that she was so used to.

Of course, Neptune's change in demeanor was quickly creating one in the writer now. With Neptune looking so... _stupid_, Blanc in turn was looking rather sour now — but that was okay, that was just how Blanc often was.

"If you're here to play some stupid prank on me..." The brunette started off with a warning, but Neptune didn't even care. She wouldn't expect anything less from the girl that she had chosen.

She didn't know how Blanc viewed her. She didn't know how to approach the subject of asking Blanc out to dinner.

She was kind of stupid like that. She couldn't lie about it — Noire was old enough to drink, unlike Neptune (just a few more years!), and she had said as much to the younger actress in a tipsy fit of honesty on more than one occasion.

She was clueless. She was no better than the dunderhead she played on TV.

She did know one thing though.

She really liked the girl in front of her, even if said girl was staring at Neptune like she had three heads.

Therefore, Neptune did the most logical thing she could think to do — the thing that would answer all of her questions in one fell swoop.

What did she do?

Nothing drastic.

She just kissed Blanc, that's all.

_She kissed Blanc._

It wasn't a "made for TV" kiss like most of her kisses in life had been. This was real. This was a kiss that had heart.

... Well...

Her heart, anyway.

Uh oh.

The actress slowly pulled away, her face starting to heat up as she began to put together how her action just how could result in some pretty terrible things going down, not the least of which being her sessions with Blanc coming to a swift and abrupt end.

"So... Uh..." Neptune was struggling to take the heat off of what had just happened, but this proved rather difficult. She wasn't moving and neither was Blanc. She could still feel Blanc's lips on her own, she could almost taste Blanc, but more than that... This wasn't going well. This wasn't going well at all. Realizing she was even more clueless now than she had been _before_ she had kissed the girl before her, Neptune forced a grin despite the pounding she was feeling in her chest. "H... How's the weather?"

Blanc was looking at her, her mouth hanging open and her eyes wide. Emotion splattered all over her face like her heart had taken up painting. Shock. Anger. Confusion. It was all there and it was all over her face.

If Neptune had to guess, inside Blanc's head, there might be a countdown — like a bomb of sorts — and any moment now, the writer was going to explode, as she often did, and tear into Neptune. She hoped it would happen soon, because she was really starting to get scared now, and...

_WHAM!_

If that wall had been a person, that person probably would have a broken bone right now.

"G-G-Give me some goddamn _warning_ before you do that next time or I'll write you into a coma next year!"

Neptune winced, covering her face with her arms just in case the next target of Blanc's fist happened to be her gorgeous face. One might say it was a strange relationship for actress and writer to have, but the undeniable fact was that she knew from experience that Blanc packed a mean punch — a punch she was all too sure was on the way right now.

Except... the blow never came.

Hesitantly, Neptune lowered her hands to sneak a peek at Blanc.

The brunette was staring at her, face bright red, with an annoyed, almost... expectant look on her face? Why? Was she waiting for Neptune to lower her guard before she finished her off?

"Aren't you gonna hit me?" Despite herself, Neptune couldn't help but ask. One just couldn't be too careful when around this firecracker of a writer — and if it meant avoiding being written into a coma, she should probably just take the hit anyway, right? Who knew what such a turn of events could do to the show's ratings...?!

Yet as Blanc replied, it seemed as though she and Blanc were on completely different wavelengths at that moment.

"Don't tell me you're into that stuff too. Do you know how hard it is changing Noire's scenes last minute when she's feeling sor..." Blushing deeper as she realized Neptune had absolutely no idea what she was talking about, Blanc cut herself off and looked away. _She_ would be the one getting hit if she let that secret of Noire's slip out. For the moment, she simply focused her attention on glaring at the wall. "Just. Forget that. Anyway, why would I hit you?"

Neptune titled her head, her blush fading somewhat. If Blanc was really asking, then...

"For getting my lines wrong ten times in a row even with you showing me cue cards, for eating your leftover food without asking while you're working on changes I asked you to make on the script, for telling the music director you think she's a wimp, for giving your sisters too much pudding that time and getting them sick, for _me_ getting sick here when we were working late and making you have to stay here overnight, for..." And now, after her list of actual examples started to reach its end, Neptune's blush returned. "... kissing you?"

In the back of Neptune's mind, it occurred to her that bringing up all of these examples might have been a pretty bad idea considering the writer before her was obviously already feeling rather testy. Why point out all of the things that had given Blanc reason to hit her in the past when she had, for some reason, yet to do so now?

"I don't remember hitting you for that." Instead, the scowling writer simply sighed. She almost looked amused, in a weird, angry sort of way — it wasn't like the tsundere way Neptune was used to seeing from Noire on set all day, this was a sweet, grumpy, "it can't be helped" expression that had its own charm completely unlike anything the beloved starlet she worked with had. "But I _do_ remember hitting you for getting surprised by something we foreshadowed months beforehand... More than once too. I thought you were better at paying attention to dialogue. Haven't we gone over how every word can count?"

For some reason, despite the harsh words, the way Blanc was saying them was anything but.

Even so, Neptune had no idea what Blanc was talking about. What dialogue? They weren't talking about the script — Blanc had just told her there _was no script_ to even look over in the first place. Wondering if she should be concerned — maybe she had shocked Blanc so much, she had amnesia! — Neptune hesitantly leaned forward to get a better look at Blanc, a small frown on her face.

"Blanc, I think I mighta messed your head up. We weren't talking about any dialogue or anything like that, all that happened was-"

Before Neptune could explain herself and her concerns for the person she had gotten to know and care about over the time they had spent working together, something prevented her from doing so. Something that, in a way, at least wiped all her concerns about amnesia away without any problem.

_Blanc_ was kissing _her_.

Being the goofball that she was, Neptune didn't have to think too hard about how to respond to this.

She kissed Blanc right back.

It was a clumsy kiss. Their positions weren't ideal and there were no cameras they were trying to make it look good for. It was just for the two of them — but for the two of them, it was more than any of those kisses on screen could ever be. It didn't last too long, but it wasn't so short that it could be called chaste either.

It was just right.

For a moment, the actress and the writer simply sat there, taking in what had just happened between them. They both shared an expression of both embarassment and excited nervousness, or at least versions of the expression appropriate to them.

"But Blanc... I still don't get what you meant about that dialogue junk..." Unfortunately, Neptune was still Neptune, and she still didn't have any idea what Blanc had been trying to say to her prior to that very welcome kiss. She also didn't know the meaning of the word "tact."

The writer next to her lowered her gaze, her cheeks darkening considerably as she explained herself.

"I... I said 'next time,' you idiot. It was a cue. It meant 'saying that was the warning in itself, so shut up and kiss me again.'"

Neptune wasn't sure if it would ruin the moment, but considering how good she was feeling combined with the words that Blanc just spoke, she couldn't help herself. She laughed, and she didn't care that Blanc was glaring at her.

"Okay, _maybe_ that was a cue I missed or it was foreshadowing for _something_ or whatever you wanna call it, but I'm pretty sure you're the only one who would think of it like a cue like _that_." Still amused, Neptune leaned back in her seat and let out a sigh of relief. She hadn't even imagined she would actually kiss Blanc tonight — she'd just wanted to ask her out! ... Which she still hadn't done, admittedly, but that would be easy after this! This had worked out so much better than she had ever imagined it would, so...

... why was Blanc looking grumpy again?

"Um..." Blinking, Neptune scooted over just a little bit — her shoulder now touching Blanc's — to really get a good look at her this time. She tilted her head and leaned over just a little more, face dangerously close to the face of the brunette that she had been kissing only moments prior — she could probably count her eyelashes if she wanted. "What is it? I know my breath isn't bad or anything, but..."

It looked like Blanc said something, and maybe she did, but either her words were such a mess or she had said it so quietly that it couldn't be understood, because for the life of her, Neptune had no idea what came out of Blanc's lips — if anything — in response to her question just then. She was still looking at the floor, too!

"I didn't get that."

The writer inhaled. Whatever was on her mind, Neptune was wondering if it was serious. Maybe she _did_ have bad breath?

"The... The explanation just then was a cue too."

Oh.

... _Oh_.

Blanc wanted another kiss.

In that case...

A catlike grin spread across Neptune's lips as the pieces clicked together.

"You're gonna have to drop this 'I'm the writer' mumbo jumbo when we're together, Blanc, because I plan on 'writing' just as much as you here, if you know what I mean."

But... Just in case she didn't...

Neptune gently closed the distance between them, brushing her lips against Blanc's once more.

With that, Blanc understood what Neptune was trying to say to her loud and clear.


	30. Crackombo Zone Boss - Second Form

"Gah!"

Neptune jolted up in bed, her eyes wide, and looked around frantically. She had to make sure she was in her bed — her _real_ bed — and not some swanky apartment in a city she had never seen before in a universe she had never been to before that she was paying for doing a job that she could never do.

"Please be games on the shelf instead of movies I've never heard of, please be games on the shelf instead of movies I've never heard of..."

It was the only way she would know for sure if she was home.

And as soon as she spotted the cover of one thing in particular...

"Whew! Thank Histy for _that_! I never thought I'd be this happy to see Battlefrogs in my life!"

Upon confirming that she was indeed in the bed in her room that she had always slept in, she let out a sigh of relief and dropped backwards, her head crashing onto her pillow and her arms landing onto the sheets as she did. She wasn't in any "Filmindustri," and thank goodness for that. She was in her bed in her Basilicom in her Planeptune that she was the goddess of.

"Well... One of the _two_ goddesses of..." The CPU corrected herself, shooting a glance to her side, a smile creeping up on her face as she imagined getting to spy on the other goddess fast asleep. She was surprised her waking up from her dream hadn't woken up her wife, but if it let her spy on the other girl's sleeping face, she wasn't about to complain about something like that for very long at all. The only problem was... "Wait a- Where the heck is she?"

There was no one else in Neptune's bed right now.

"Guess that explains why I didn't wake her up..." Despite the comment, the CPU of Planeptune couldn't help feeling lonely seeing the sheets and blankets empty beside her. Not that she had anything against Blanc, but she was happily married and darn it, she could have really used a cuddle right about now, even if it meant being in the dogoo house tomorrow for waking her wife up to get it. "I wonder what she's up to..."

Pondering this for a moment, a grin slowly began to creepy onto the still tired Neptune's face. If her wife could sneak away from her during the middle of the night, she couldn't blame Neptune if Neptune did the reverse to her, now could she?

Slipping out of bed, the pajama-clad CPU began tiptoeing her way out of the bedroom and into the hallway of the Basilicom. Gone were the thoughts about that vivid dream she had been having — her mind was set on one thing and one thing only: finding that bride of hers and showing her what happened when she walked out on the mighty Purple Heart in the middle of the night!

Perhaps if she were more awake, such a plan might have felt a little childish, even by her standards... Or maybe it might have felt not nearly elaborate enough for the situation. The CPU was too sleepy to think too much on it — she just wanted to find her wifey as soon as she could.

Luckily, if Neptune really had to guess, she actually had a fairly good idea what she would find her wife doing this late and by herself. It wasn't like they were attached at the hip or anything — they both had their own interests that didn't always intersect all of the time. They had both known that about each other long before they had gotten married — Neptune even teased her about some of her hobbies that she didn't share on occasion. It was no big deal, right?

There was just... this one hobby of hers though. Well, it was a big one, but Neptune just didn't get how it kept coming to this.

Neptune didn't think she was embarrassed by the fact that she knew about it, since that had been the case for years, but maybe it was different now that they were married? She wasn't bothered by it or anything, at least.

"Then again, it's not like she was really ever super secretive about it before... Unless it's the other one... Then it's not like she was ever super open about _that_ one, but..." She shrugged as she considered this, fighting back a yawn. They were married now! Her wife's embarrassing secrets were Neptune's, just like the skeletons in Neptune's closets, basement, and attic were for her wife in turn!

Whatever the case was, chances were pretty high that her wife was off doing _something_ by herself, and if that was the case, then Neptune was more than happy to remind her that there were no secrets between the two of them — possibly doing so while simultaneously embarrassing the heck out of her and/or getting to see her all flustered in getting caught to boot! In other words, it was a win-win for Neptune!

And sure enough?

It looked like the person Neptune was seeking was in her favored room for such activities after all. It had computers, all kinds of clothes, costumes, books, stuffed animals, just about whatever a guest could want in there — not that she was a guest in this house... er, Basilicom. Never. Even before the marriage, her being here had just always made sense.

The CPU grinned as she stood in front of the door. The light was on, but it was dimmed to the point that there was no way someone focused on what they were doing would notice someone approaching. Neptune could walk right up to her, maybe cop a feel (no offense to dream Blanc, but as hypocritical as it made her considering her own previous body issues, Neptune, well... while she was no aficionado like Nepgear, she didn't dislike a more... _rounded_... m-moving on!), before giving her wifey the proper greeting she deserved.

Though the groping might apply to that, depending on the situation. Neptune would just have to see, now wouldn't she?

Slowly, ever so slowly, eeeeever soooo _sloooowly_, Neptune began her entrance into the dimly lit room. Spotting the unknowing target of her adoration in the perfect position for a surprise midnight greeting, Neptune had to do everything she could not to just tackle her to the ground and playfully complain for leaving her alone at night then and there. Instead, she continued her approach — she was the monster hunter and the vixen before her was her high level dragon, waiting to be hunted.

She had to time this just right... She needed to get close enough... She had to hold her breath now, because she was so close it would be felt if she did... Ready, aaaaand...!

_Midnight Grope Attack Go!_

"Heeeeellooooooooooooo _nurse_!"

The buxom blonde Neptune had gleefully (and _gently_, she would have any wondering minds know) latched onto let out a shriek of surprise at the sudden entrance of her wife, spinning in her seat with burning bright cheeks to gape at the smaller girl, who was now draped over her. She was still in a rather compromising position with her hands no less too, though it seemed like the surprise was conveniently blocking that fact from reaching her for the moment.

With her mission complete, Neptune decided to play it safe — she removed her hands and instead lazily wrapped them around her wife's neck to drop her face onto one of her shoulders. She closed her eyes, a teasing smile on her face — content now that she was finally where she belonged again. Her favorite pillow really needed to stop this bad habit of hers!

"Seriously, if you gotta grind that badly, at least leave me the hug pillow that has you on it... And if it's just dirty games, you can do those during the day, can't you?" Neptune honestly wasn't _that_ perturbed that Vert was doing this — whichever thing the "this" was — she loved Vert. More than she'd ever loved anybody. Vert hadn't asked her to change any of her habits, who was she to do so to Vert? Especially after everything Vert had done for her and Planeptune when she had taken up Histoire's proposal and agreed to save them all that time ago? She couldn't go that far. Even she, lazy slob extraordinaire, wouldn't go that far... "It sucks waking up at night by myself."

She just wished the other CPU would give her a little warning or leave a note or something — she was usually good about sneaking back into bed before Neptune woke up most of the time (Neptune had learned this after she started realizing the days Vert wanted to sleep in all day were typically the days _after_ raids or big game releases), but when someone wakes up in the middle of the night and expects someone to be there, them not being there — even if they know why when they're fully awake — isn't a fun experience.

The blonde CPU sighed as she felt Neptune's head pressing gently against her own. Her heart was pounding from the combination of the shock and the greeting that Neptune had given her, and once she had registered what was happening, it started to pick up the pace even more out of happiness — who doesn't want a greeting like that from their wife in the middle of the night?

... okay, fine, so most people don't want that, but Vert got a lot of things from all the anime she watched. In other words, this seemed like a perfectly normal thing to be happy about to her, thus leading to her heart picking up the pace that much more. While she was starting to calm down now, she was sure Neptune could hear it. If it was that loud for Vert, it would be impossible for Neptune not to hear it.

Still, happy as she was that Neptune had come to see her (and relieved as she was that she had finished playing that new eroge a little while ago)...

"Neptune, I..."

... shouldn't be making you do this in the first place.

It was frustrating. She wasn't sure which bothered her more. The fact that she couldn't have Neptune and her games at once, the fact that Neptune never _really_ complained about Vert leaving her periodically to binge on them, the fact that no other CPU would likely do this sort of thing to the lonesome Neptune, or the fact that Vert felt more bothered by this situation than it seemed Neptune was, which just didn't make any sense at all considering their positions. Neptune was the one who had been going through so much — was she just turning into a masochist?

Was... Was Vert turning Neptune into a doormat through her love of games forcing her to put her adorable Neptune second to them time and time again...?!

Now, the fact that "the fact that Neptune kept interrupting her precious gaming sessions" wasn't even on the list of things Vert found frustrating about this situation would have clued most people in to how they really felt about said situation. In fact, that realization might clear up where their priorities were straight away.

Maybe Vert would catch on someday.

It'd help if new games didn't keep coming out to distract her, though.

However, a yawn at Vert's side distracted her much sooner that that. It was a pleasant noise. The feeling of her wife's breath against her skin brought a tingling sensation to Vert's entire face.

"I c'n go boot up the laptop and drop in if there's room in your party..." Neptune made a sleepy offer with her eyes still closed and her arms still looped around Vert. She was still standing, still tired despite having been woken up by a strange dream (not that Vert was aware of this — and not that she ever would be either, if Neptune didn't want to sleep on the couch that is), yet she refused to budge from her spot. "You'll owe me pudding tomorrow tho'..."

She just wanted to be with Vert.

Against a simple event in her game like the one she was staying up for tonight, something like that was an unbeatable final boss in comparison.

As she considered this, Vert sighed again.

It wasn't a sigh like the previous one. A smile had formed on her face as she made it, and she began closing out of things as quietly as she could as to not let Neptune — whose eyes were still closed — in on what she was up to.

"Veeert...? Is your party full or nooot...?" The smaller girl at her side didn't seem too invested in actually following through with her own offer, and Vert knew it — Neptune seemed perfectly content just having Vert in her arms in this faux-cuddle she had managed after sneaking up on the other CPU. She still had yet to open her eyes or catch on to what Vert was doing, and chances were she'd probably stay like this until she really did fall asleep (Vert knew this because it had... kind of happened once before) if Vert let her. "C'mon, if it's not, lemme join...!"

That's right.

Neptune just wanted to be with her.

And while her games may have a very powerful grip on some aspects of her life, the end of the lasso attached to her heart was always going to be meant for Neptune's hands only.

"My, and let a sleepwalker like you cost us the match? I don't think anyone but our opponents would appreciate something like that, Neptune." Her voice teasing, Vert leaned back, into Neptune, as the computer — muted, naturally — shut down. The sleepy CPU attached to her still hadn't caught on to Vert's scheme yet, instead grumbling under her breath.

Giggling at the sound of it, Vert decided it was time to end the game they were playing — well, the game _she_ was playing, anyway. Despite how tired she was, Neptune seemed like she wouldn't be letting go of Vert for just about anything right now. With that in mind, if Vert moved just right and was as precise in real life as she was in her games...

"W-What's going on!? I'm being Nepnapped!"

... she could pick up her little sweetheart piggyback style!

"Oh hush, you, or I'll drop you on the floor." Straightening herself, Vert made sure she had a good grip on Neptune's legs as she took a step away from where she had been playing. Neptune was still holding on to her, just as Vert knew she would, but now it seemed as though she was somewhat more awake than she had been. "Do you really think I have the fortitude to be able to ignore the beckons of my angel for more than a moment?"

Neptune blinked lazily. What the _heck_ was that about...?

"I have... I have noooooo idea what you just said, Vert." Yawning, Neptune resigned to her fate of being carried and got cozy, leaning into Vert's neck and letting out a sigh of satisfaction. This was much better than standing up or being alone in bed for sure... Still, she couldn't leave what Vert said alone just yet. "You really shouldn't play those castley medievaly games late at night if you start talking like that after. You'll get brainwashed and turn into an old timey queen!"

Vert couldn't help but pout at that response, ignoring the half-hearted laugh Neptune made after her sleepy joke. She doubted Neptune's tiredness had anything to do with her attempt at fancy flirting being dismissed so easily either.

Oh well. That was just how Neptune was.

"If I do ever turn into an 'old timey queen,' would you be willing to grind as many levels as it takes to fight all the bosses and save me from being their prisoner?"

And without even a moment's hesitation...

"'Course I would."

Vert beamed.

She wouldn't have Neptune be any other way.

* * *

><p><em>"My goodness... We're getting nowhere arguing about this, and Neptune and Nepgear's situation isn't getting one bit better. If neither of you are willing, then I'll do it."<em>

_The other two CPUs stared at her. Even Histoire looked surprised by Vert's words. Perhaps she hadn't expected Vert to be the one to speak up out of the group — or perhaps she hadn't expected anyone to actually be willing to answer her plea._

_"Y-You're just saying that to get into Nepgear's pants!"_

_Naturally, Blanc was the first to object._

_"If that were the case, marrying her sister would be rather counterproductive of me, now wouldn't it? Unless you plan on taking my place, I don't think you have any place to complain about this."_

_"T-That's..."_

_Surprisingly, Blanc became deathly silent for the rest of the meeting after that._

_Vert looked to Noire, her expression becoming pensive — concerned, even. The black haired CPU still looked stunned by Vert's decision, but after a moment, she seemed to be regaining her composure well enough. Whether she was accepting it or getting ready to fight, Vert was prepared. If she said something, then Vert wouldn't be opposed to changing her mind..._

_"H-Hmph! That's fine with me. I feel sorry for you, Vert — stuck to Neptune forever. That sounds horrible. You've always been ridiculously good natured, but don't complain if she brings Leanbox down next."_

_It took a little more discussion, but in the end, Noire promised to support Leanbox and Planeptune as much as was necessary to get the people willing to accept this absurd idea, but that would be it from her. They were on their own after._

_And that, as they say, was that._

_Just like that, Vert and Neptune were to be married._

_For a long time, Vert wondered if she had made the right choice. Noire probably would have stepped up if she had been given more time to think about it, but... The problem with that was just that there hadn't been more time. Perhaps she wasn't worthy of the role of Neptune's wife, but someone had to be. Indeed, part of her decision had been selfish, in a way. Concern primarily for Neptune's sister — a girl that she considered her own sister, maybe even something more than that — had most definitely been a factor in her decision._

_It was also just who she was. Caring was in her nature. A pair of her friends were in grave danger and she had the power to do something about it. How could she not act?_

_Time and time again, from dimension to dimension, this was a trait of hers — and even her very nation itself — that repeatedly continued to shine. From her own willingness to work with Planeptune in one world to her Oracle's willingness to aid the Candidates however she could for the sake of who she cared about, this was simply how the people of Leanbox conducted themselves._

_Some might consider it masochistic to function like this — at the very least, self-destructive. Observing the actions in other worlds still, it wouldn't be strange at all to think that way — from a goddess that would set aside her own desires to pursue aiding another nation in need to an Oracle that would risk the wrath of that goddess in the hopes of helping that goddess find some happiness._

_Really, what was wrong with this nation? They should be more selfish, like Planeptune or Lastation, if they wanted to survive._

_Yet this was how they were. No matter what._

_The same held true for this land._

_She and Neptune didn't hit it off like magic. Neptune was far worse off than Vert could have ever imagined. She questioned if she was the right person for this on more than one occasion, but still, she stayed by Neptune's side through every step of Planeptune's slow and steady recovery. At some point, she stopped worrying about whether or not it would happen. It didn't matter if it did or not. This was the path she had chosen, and she could be happy knowing she was doing something she could be proud of, helping people she cared about, couldn't she?_

_She could._

_In time, she forgot about her worries. Life with Neptune became natural for her. They weren't exactly a real couple, but she would be lying if she ever said she wasn't coming to enjoy the company of the other CPU — far more than she had ever anticipated. Certainly, they never would probably become a "real" couple, but she was enjoying what they had just fine._

_And yet..._

_It _did_ happen._

_It was a slow process for both of them. It took months of growing accustomed to the other and growing to care more and more about the other. They didn't even realize it._

_It happened on the morning Nepgear finally woke up, months and months after the wedding that had gotten the process of her recovery started._

_Relief filled both of them from head to toe._

_Happiness surged through their bodies and their hearts._

_And in that moment, that ecstatic, happy moment, the feeling just had to be expressed._

_Vert just grabbed Neptune and kissed her right then and there._

_Neptune didn't complain, however._

_Because she had been reaching over to do the exact same thing._

* * *

><p>There were no birds chirping when Vert finally decided to move from bed. She let out a noise that seemed like it was torn between whether or not it wanted to be a groan and a moan and tugged her wife close, incoherent noises slipping out as she burned her face in the shorter girl's hair.<p>

Yes, that's right. Turning Neptune into a pillow was "moving from bed," as far as this couple was concerned this afternoon.

"See? This is what happens." Neptune was smirking knowingly, not minding the extra attention from the exhausted CPU that held her. She had been up for a little while already, but with Nepgear away for the week, she had no reason to get up — and she didn't particularly have a desire to anyway, especially after the previous night.

"I don't want to hear that from you, Neptune... At least I have a _reason_ for sleeping in... You'll do it anyway even if you go to sleep _early_..." Despite her words, a smile was gracing Vert's features as she spoke into the smaller girl's hair, an irreplaceable warmth filling her as she held Neptune close. "You lazybones."

"That's because I get to spend more time with you in the morning if I do." Cheeky as ever, Neptune simply offered this as her reason for being the way she was to Vert. She was getting what she wanted, after all, she could brush off some remarks like the ones Vert was making now no problem.

"My, is that so? Strange... That would mean something if you hadn't always been this way." Vert closed her eyes, sighing wistfully. She was still a little tired, truth be told. "It's very convenient for me, though, so I won't complain too much. Just so long as you stay with me like this for a little longer..."

They probably wouldn't be up until dinner at this rate.

Neptune simply grinned at the thought of wasting a day away with Vert like this.

"You don't even have to ask."


	31. A Shameless News Broadcast!

**WE INTERRUPT THIS PROGRAM TO BRING YOU...**

In a very familiar studio, on a very familiar set, in front of a familiar desk, with two familiar glasses of thankfully unfamiliarly fresh water, two very familiar girls settled in front of the cameras.

It was a scene most were familair with. It was the magical place where the fourth wall was shattered beyond repair, where product placement was rampant, and where dreams of players were crushed as they frantically rushed to help websites.

That's right...!

It was time for another exciting episode of...!

**NEPSTATION!**

With the familiar logo flashing in neon colors on a sign just above the heads of the two hosts, the cameras flickered to life and began filming the lovely pair of news ladies.

"Whew! We're finally just about done with that crazy set of Special Stages." The purple haired girl on the right, clad in her usual white hoodie, smiled broadly and wiped her forehead with the back of her palm to emphasize her relief at her long and arduous task finally being complete. "These have really been something else! You didn't get to appear in any of them — actually, you've never been in any of them before — but what did you think, sexy cohost of mine?"

"I'm glad you asked, _equally_ sexy cohost of mine!" The purple haired girl on the left, wearing the _black_ hoodie that she had taken up to wearing recently — at a certain someone's request — to keep her identity a secret, smiled brightly in turn, almost a mirror image of the girl on her right. After all, with her hood down now, all bets were off. "I would have to say that I thought the same thing you did."

The girl on the right nodded seriously at this answer — the expression was surprisingly unlike her, but the girl on the left seemed to agree with it for some reason, because she took to mimicking it after just a moment.

"I see, I see... That makes sense, because..." All pretenses of seriousness dropped, the girl on the right opened her arms wide and smiled brightly towards the cameras. "Today's Nepstation is being brought to you with a pair of very special hosts! Take it away, gorgeous!"

Not missing a beat, the girl in black on the left nodded and picked up right where the girl in white on the right left off.

"You're completely right! Next to me, from _The Proposal_, we have... Neptune! The sexiest, cutest, and most lovable CPU you ever did see! Give her a round of applause, everyone!" With her introduction complete, the girl in black began clapping for her cohost, since there was no actual live audience here to do so for her.

"But wait! There's more! Next to _me_, _The Proposal_'s sexy, cute, and lovable Neptune... is the sexy, cute, and lovable Neptune from _Into the Abyss_, invited here by our mysterious director-slash-camera-person! Give this shameless cameo a round of applause!" Now with her introduction for her counterpart complete, the Neptune on the right — henceforth to be known as Noire's Honeybunch — put her hands together just as the Neptune on the left — henceforth to be known as Darker and Neppier — had done for her a moment ago. "I, Neptune, welcome you, Neptune, to the Special Stages! Now let's deliver the news! Care to start us off, Neptune?"

At this suggestion, Darker and Neppier nodded cheerfully, before turning back to the camera.

"Don't mind if I, Neptune, do just that, Neptune!" Picking up some papers on the table, Darker and Neppier got right down to business. After all, she was back in her element for once! She was gonna enjoy this as much as possible, since as soon as this ended, she'd have to go right back to her story again. "First order of business... Holy Nep! What a reception to those last few Special Stage things! I'm glad I, Neptune, don't have to deal with this kind of stuff, Neptune."

"Whaddya mean?" Noire's Honeybunch raised an eyebrow at the comment her Darker and Neppier counterpart raised. In those little pocket universes, she (or "she") had been enjoying herself well enough, so to speak. They were their own thing, just like all the Special Stages were. "Don't you have it way worse than me? I get a harem ending here, you just get beat up a lot over there."

Darker and Neppier shook her head, which led to Noire's Honeybunch considering the possibility of her counterpart having become a masochist. Then again, anyone who spent enough time with Plutie probably had that as a hidden character trait, just waiting to emerge...

Unaware of her counterpart's thoughts, the girl in black simply removed a list from hammerspace and began skimming over it as she spoke.

"Look at this — the 'Zone' had ideas that could've gone on for over _ten_ of those 'Acts,' and people have been sending in how they think the last form of the boss is gonna go! Look at this — even Uni is on here!" Shaking her head once more, Darker and Neppier set the list down, looking absolutely set in her decision. "I'm definitely better off than you."

"I dunno about that. I, _Neptune_, didn't think they were _that_ bad, Nep_two_..." Noire's Honeybunch grinned sheepishly at the look Darker and Neppier was sending her way. "Ya know, that's what your story needs more of, come to think of it! You've got your regular action and adventure going on, but you need _this_ kind of action much more, know what I mean, Neptune? _Wink wink_."

Following up her comment, Noire's Honeybunch wiggled her eyebrows suggestively. Darker and Neppier, in turn, coughed — initially taken aback by the idea — before she stuck her tongue out.

"No thanks! I'm just fine and peachy without having to worry about all the emotional junk _you_ have to stress out about. The single life is the way to be, sister!" Nodding seriously, the Neptune in black reached for her glass of water to start taking a sip from it — she was thirsty. "I can have just as much fun with anybody I want to like this, but without aaaany of the stuff your story has you getting your panties in a bunch over."

"No fair! You're having way less fun than I am!" Pouting, Noire's Honeybunch crossed her arms as her counterpart shrugged teasingly, taking a longer drink now as if to dismiss the topic entirely. Well, if that was how this girl wanted to play, then so be it! "C'mon... Just think about all the sex I get to have that you're missing out on."

"_PFFFFFFFFFFFFF-_"

As expected, water sprayed everywhere.

"Hahahaha! You should see your face! I don't care how old that gag is getting, I'm never gonna give it up!" Clutching her sides, Noire's Honeybunch happily slapped the table as Darker and Neppier, cheeks burning bright red, shot a flustered glare in her direction as she used her sleeve to wipe up the water she had just let out all over the place. "Hey, don't get mad — you can't get mad at _yourself_, can you?"

"I'm not _mad_ — besides, everyone knows pure, untouched girls like me always get higher on the polls than girls that sleep around like you were in these Special Stages you're so proud of. I can't believe you think Noire will take you back..." Darker and Neppier grinned triumphantly at the look Noire's Honeybunch sent her way, before she leaned back in her seat dismissively. "Anyway, just 'cause my story doesn't have it now doesn't mean it _won't_. Vert and Noire aren't even in it yet."

Noire's Honeybunch tilted her head at that comment. She supposed those two _were_ often the instigators of such shenanigans in the normal games — she wasn't sure if Darker and Neppier over there could pick up on it yet, considering she was in the same place she herself had been before her own story had even started as far as this subject was concerned, but now that she was in a relationship with Noire, and was better adapted to reading her mood, looking back...

... _man_, Noire had had it _bad_. Who knew she had been including "oblivious hero" in her list of awesome protagonist traits for so long?

It was actually fun, seeing an almost... "past self" in the her from this other story — the her that wasn't in a relationship at all.

... Wait...

Darker and Neppier's story was taking place in another universe, wasn't it? So hold on...!

"Hey, hey, spoil me. Spoooiiil meeeeee...!" Forgetting about the fact that they were on camera, or just deciding this was far more important, Noire's Honeybunch scooted her seat closer to Darker and Neppier, leaning in as if to beckon her closer. "Tell me everything you know, all the dirty details! Why's it those two you mention specifically, huh? Huh?"

Darker and Neppier frowned at the request. It wasn't that she was against telling herself about it, but...

"Hold on a sec. Just let me...

**WE INTERRUPT THIS INTERRUPTION TO BRING YOU... COWARD, THE COURAGEOUS DOGOO SHOW! STARRING... COWARD, THE COURAGEOUS DOGOO! ABANDONED AS A DROP, HE WAS FOUND BY UNDERLING, WHO LIVES IN THE MIDDLE OF SOMEWHERE, WITH HER HUSBAND, A DIRTY RAT! BUT DIIIIIIIRTY STUFF HAPPENS IN SOMEWHERE! IT'S UP TO COWARD TO SAVE HIS NEW HOME!**

... don't know if I could handle that..." Noire's Honeybunch sat back in her seat, an uncharacteristically contemplative look on her face as she considered what Darker and Neppier had told her about the future of her story. "Okay, so like, if _my_ Noire ever wanted to do that stuff to me, if she buttered me up a little, just 'cause you can't agree to that kind of thing without a fight, then I'd be all _over_ that — and her! — but your Noire sounds like... hey, don't look at me like that! You'll become a big girl someday too, and when you do... seriously! Quit it!"

Viewers at home might recognize Darker and Neppier's expression — she was making "the Nepgear face." Yes, that one. _That_ face.

For a few moments, the two identical faces stared at each other... before sighing in unison and letting out their same trademark comment in stereo.

"Neppu..."

"So, back to the news?"

"Back to the news!"

Turning back to the screen as if absolutely nothing had happened, brushing off prior events and ignoring all emotional obligations in the way only the super awesome protagonist that is Neptune could, the pair of Neptunes put on their most professional looking faces and turned back to the camera.

"There are a couple of big reasons we're interrupting the Crackombo Zone for this special news bulletin, so let's get right down to them! Here's the first one...!" Whipping a remote control out of her inventory, Noire's Honeybunch twirled it around like a gun before dramatically tapping a button to bring the screens behind her to life. "While we've been screwing around in these Special Stages, the big wigs have been _busy_ putting out stuff about the super awesome new game! Check it out!"

While Noire's Honeybunch was somewhat familiar with the upcoming feature length Nepstravaganza supreme, having checked it out in a previous Special Stage, Darker and Neppier, a Special Stages first timer, could only look on wide eyed at the different pictures of the upcoming adventure and new characters that were being displayed on the screens.

"First on the agenda...! In the exciting new installment of our super awesome series, there are gonna be Dark Goddesses! And no, I don't mean like Plutie!" Tapping away and her remote, images flashed on the screen, revealing all the new information that had come about since the last time the Special Stages had been enveloped by the hype train. "These devious divas are the bad guys, or something, don't ask me, of the alternate universe where this part of the game takes place! There, you'll also find..."

However, seeing this, Darker and Neppier could only tilt her head. After all...

"Sexy Nep! Her highlights are her looking different and having a black hoodie instead of a white one, like me! She's not as sexy as the two of us, and I'm betting her butt's lost a lot of points to _rack up_ those boob points, but she's a strong contender for third place!" Noire's Honeybunch grinned in the direction of the camera, a stupidly sort of silly expression crossing her face — it was the kind of expression someone only wore when they were about to admit something revealing in public or on the internet. "If you're curious, we're second and Noire's first, but don't tell her I said that."

If not for the fact that her counterpart was being so shameless, almost as shameless as her being featured in this story at all, Darker and Neppier might have continued to feel a little distracted by the trend she was noticing here. After all...

"Did I mention the hoodie? Look at how form fitting and black it is!"

... this was starting to sound _kind of_...

"Oh, and appaaaarrently, she's got this _thing_ going on with this new and different Arfoire! Not many details yet, but hey, who cares? Look, here they are together!"

... familiar!

"I feel like I've heard something like that before... But it must not have been very important, huh?" Smiling playfully — _too_ playfully — at the screen, Noire's Honeybunch shot a glance at the girl next to her — the Neptune in the black hoodie who knew a new Arfoire and was dealing with noticeably "darker" goddesses next to her — and grinned at the camera. "Whatever it was probably doesn't matter, huh?"

Needless to say, Darker and Neppier was feeling a bit concerned. If this trend continued, wouldn't it mean her story might come under a legitimate risk of cancelation? Her ratings! Her merchandise deals! Her action figures! Her video game spinoff! The movie! The other movie! The novelisation of the movie based off of the novel! All gone before they ever had a chance!

It was too much! She had to do something about it... Something drastic...! Something... Something like...

"Oh, are you still here?" Noire's Honeybunch crossed her arms, shaking her head as if she was disappointed in a young child for making a mistake no adult would ever make. "I guess I can't expect anything else from a _faker_..."

That was all Darker and Neppier needed to bust her sword out of her inventory and take a swing. Luckily, as any good viewer knows, Nepstations all function under the rules of a certain action title — in other words, the only damage anyone can take in this lovely slice of nonsense is to their clothes, and both Neptunes present were well aware of this naughty, saucy fact.

"Wowzers...! You are Darker and Neppier!"

"Am not! Now hold still so I can strip you!"

"Are too! Anyways, you guys at home, the most important piece of news of all, and the _real_ reason for this whole chapter, is that the Crackombo Finale is gonna be it for Special Stages for a while!" Noire's Honeybunch grinned as she ducked under Darker and Neppier's sword, breaking her own sword out of her inventory to get this strip off started in full. "In case you haven't noticed, they've kinda started to get out of hand- So until further notice, we're shutting down the Special Stages after this finale!"

"But hold on to your panties, kids, because there's more!" Darker and Neppier didn't get to say much, as in that moment, Noire's Honeybunch retaliated with a quick thrust, forcing her back and away from the view of the camera, where Noire's Honeybunch resumed giving lines.

"You said it, slighly-less-attractive-Neptune! Keep an eye out for a new Proposal story somewhere on the site sometime in the super near future, 'cause unlike this, it'll be tying directly into the main one! There's also something pretty exciting in in the works, but that's a long way off for now..."

"As for the upcoming thing, they'll update the last chapter of the main story when that happens with the title of the new thing added to point you guys in the right direction once it comes out, so stay tuned!" Darker and Neppier took over making the last news announcement as she pressed Neptune back with her sword, the other CPU's sleeves falling to the wayside. "And as for _me_, you can see more of me in my story whenever you want — but right now, I've got a Nep to strip before the viewers mistake a great protagonist like me for the likes of a fake Neptune like her!"

"Fake protagonist? I think you're the fake Neptune around here. You're comparing yourself to me...? Hah! You're not even Nep enough to be my fake!"

"I'll make you Nep those words!"

From behind the camera, as the bizarre spectacle of the two Neptunes duking it out — losing more and more of their clothes and making more and more out of context gaming references all the while — continued, the mysterious camerawoman removed her director's hat and pulled down her coat, which had been hiding her face, revealing herself to be a CPU.

She continued watching the two Neptunes battle, eyes not moving a centimeter. After a moment, she wiped away the trickle of blood that had started flowing from her nose.

And as one of the Neptunes cried out as her top was torn to shreds, Noire was sure of one thing and one thing only.

"Worth it."

**WE NOW RETURN YOU TO YOUR PREVIOUSLY SCHEDULED PROGRAMMING, ALREADY IN PROGRESS...**


	32. Crackombo Zone Finale

Neptune was nervous.

Not because she had to make a confession to anyone.

Not because she wanted to sneak up on anyone.

Not because her sweetheart was lying in wait for her.

Not because she had lost a battle against a mirror image of herself and had to walk around the Basilicom naked to get new clothes.

Oh no.

Oh no no _no_.

This was not a whimsical, pitter pattering, heart fluttering nervousness such as those.

On her left sat Noire — Neptune's wife. The real one. The one she had been married to for over 60 chapters, a year, and most of the previous Special Stages before this one. _That_ Noire. Her fists were clenched in her lap. Her jaw was set. Her gaze was directed at the television that had just finished its screening of the new Special Stages. She had gone into shock at some point during the first one, and hadn't made a peep throughout the rest of the showing.

This was not good.

This was not good at all.

To make matters worse...

On Neptune's _right_ sat her "co-stars" of those Special Stages. First of them, and closest to Neptune, was Blanc. Despite the events of the Special Stages that had followed hers, Blanc was glowing more than Neptune had ever seen her... which wasn't a lot, mind, because this was Blanc, but it was still pretty darn noticeable. She wasn't saying anything, just quietly smiling at the screen, looking strangely fulfilled for reasons an oblivious protagonist like Neptune would need a much higher Understanding stat to ever understand.

That... was not going to help the Noire situation any at _all_, was it?

Next to Noire sat "co-star" number two. While Blanc was sitting quietly, like she was... ruminating over what she had seen, Vert was doing anything but. She had a palm pressed against her cheek and seemed to be _gushing_ about the whole thing, occasionally making comments to Nepgear, seated on a chair furthest away, who was looking rather annoyed at the attention the blonde was giving Neptune for some peculiar reason. She even kept giving Neptune obviously repressed dirty looks! She hadn't done anything here! She was the victim! The _victim_!

But wait. There was another. For though the viewers at home hadn't gotten to see it, as they had been stuck with an emergency news bulletin while it had been airing, the CPUs here had gotten to watch a special showing of a third "Special Stage" in the Crackombo Zone — the true final form of the boss, so to speak.

That's right.

Last but not least, next to Vert...

... was _Plutia_.

For some reason, after the first two Special Stages, a condensed version of Neptune's time in the other world had shown up on the screen that took the place of a third Special Stage. Neptune didn't see the harm in _that_, especially compared to the things the other two had shown the group, but from the way Plutie was looking over at Noire, she was starting to wonder if there was some subtext she had missed. Was it a big deal that she and Plutia had been like that for all those years? She wasn't sure. To tell the truth, after the second Special Stage, she'd kinda stopped paying attention considering...

"N... Noire? Those weren't real, you know that, right...? I mean, the one with Plutie was kind of real, but, uh, there was a lot that it left out...! So..."

... the situation on her _other_ side.

Yeah, Neptune was definitely nervous. This was completely new territory for her — what the heck was she supposed to do with this? She had been macking on two of Noire's former enemies and then... okay, she _really_ didn't get why the Plutie thing would be considered bad, but the other two had to be getting to Noire! They were getting to _her_, for Histy's sake!

"It's okay, Neppy." To her surprise, it was Plutia who spoke up. All heads in the room turned to look at the CPU from the other dimension, and she faced the various expressions with a beaming smile that could only be described as clueless... perhaps purposefully so. One had to be careful when it came to her. "Just because you two will neeeeeever raise or even get to be _part_ of such a _loving_ family like _we_ had... That doesn't mean your relationship with _her_ isn't as _real_ and _beautiful_ and _magical_ and _meaningful_ as ours was... It's just _different_. That's aaaaall..."

All eyes widened and all jaws dropped as the CPU, her devious mission accomplished, hopped off her seat, started humming, and began her way out of the room. She wasn't allowed too many lines with the main cast yet, after all, but it was nice to be able to drop by and play with them like she had just then. She was starting to understand why Neptune liked messing with her dimension's Noire so much — they were so similar, but the dynamics were just so _different_! It was so much _fun_!

Even with the speaker now gone, Plutia's words had been like a bomb. After all, while those Special Stages may have been peeks into things that could have been or were in some crazy other universes and stories, things just as real to those places as this story was to this one, they _weren't_ real to this one. On the other hand?

Neptune absolutely had lived with Plutia in a way just like or fairly similar to what they had watched on the screen for over a decade — no, she had lived that. All of it. It had just left out all of the times where she had interacted with anyone other than Plutia... which still left _years_ of material of just the two of them and their "kids" at times. There was another Noire who had spent a good deal of that time secretly jealous of it out there who could testify to that.

"Neptune..." Neptune gulped audibly as Noire spoke her name. That was not the tone of a forgiving woman. In fact, that was not the tone of a woman Neptune wanted to be near at all — which was not good, because it just so happened that the woman talking like that was someone Neptune happened to like being near very much. "You have three choices. Get them out, get me out, or get yourself out."

A bead of sweat rolled down Neptune's neck as she considered the three "options."

Even though she'd made it sound like this situation was really, really bad with her other "choices," that was really just the tsundere talking — the _angry_ tsundere. Basically, Noire was saying she wanted to talk to Neptune alone and Blanc and Vert needed to leave before that could happen — she needed to reaffirm that Neptune cared about her and not either of them. Her "ultimatum" was just her way of asking.

Boy, Neptune was _really_ glad she had gotten that Tsunderese diploma in her spare time.

Before Neptune could start the process of getting Blanc and Vert out of there — she was really glad Plutia had taken care of leaving herself — someone unexpected spoke up.

"Oh goodness, I'll go get the sheets, sis! You know, just in case you have to sleep on the couch after this..." After finally recovering from Plutia's comment and starting on Noire's, Neptune found herself gaping once more — this time thanks to _Nepgear_ of all people! Seriously, Nepgear, have mercy...!

There was nothing she could say to her little sister, for she had already gone the way of Plutia and left the room, leaving Neptune to wonder what the heck she had done to deserve this.

* * *

><p>As soon as she was off screen, Nepgear found herself leaping into the air and delivering a high five to Plutia (who did not leap into the air, much to Nepgear's embarrassment and disappointment), who had been lying in wait after her own exit to see how that went for her remake buddy. She had <em>finally<em> gotten to say something with the rest of the main cast around! Sure, it had only been because the line was a way for her to leave the scene, but it was a huge improvement — and it was the cause for celebration for sure!

She just wished she could have gotten to do it over something that wasn't so... so...

"Uwaaaaah... Neppy Jr... You _are_ mad...! You're _really_ mad! Your jealous face is so _cuuuuute_...! I wanna eat it right up..."

"W-W-What the goodness?! I am _not_ angry, not at all! That was just a pretense for me to be able to leave...!"

"Suuuuuure... I believe you. Reeeaally..."

"P-Plutiiiiiaaaaa...! Stooooop...!"

* * *

><p>For some strange reason, Neptune felt like she should be worried about something, something <em>other<em> than Noire, but at that moment, she just couldn't quite place what it was or why she should invest the time to figure out why she should care. More importantly, she had the situation right in front of her to deal with. Whatever was happening elsewhere was none of her concern with this happening right before her very eyes!

Three pairs of eyes were watching her expectantly — though Neptune only was particularly invested in the red ones.

"Okay, you heard her. Go on home before she gets _really_ mad." Taking the bolder approach, Neptune stood up and put her hands on her hips, turning to Blanc and Vert and waiting. There wasn't _really_ a reason for them to stay here, right? So her asking should have been enough, but strangely, this... didn't seem to please Noire — nor did it have any effect on the two CPUs she was addressing.

Instead of getting up, which is what Neptune was really going for here, Vert and Blanc exchanged looks. They weren't very agreeable looks — at least agreeable as in "we're going to abide by what Noire is asking and leave," at any rate. They _were_ looking pretty agreeable with _each other_, though, and that was definitely not a good sign for Neptune. Exasperation already started sneaking its nasty way in, and they hadn't even started talking yet...

"My, I don't think she has a problem with us being here at all. What do you think, Blanc?" Looking far too pleasant given the circumstances, Vert looked cheerily at Blanc, practically ignoring Neptune's existence at this point.

"For someone who was looking so pleased with hooking up with me, I'm starting to feel kinda left out here..." Neptune grumbled under her breath — perhaps it was lucky no one heard her saying this. She didn't want Nepgear to have to get her sheets for the couch in Plutia's Basilicom rather than this one, after all.

"For once, I agree. She looks like she's just fine with us sticking around." Neptune might have expected as much from Vert, but Blanc too? This was starting to feel like she was still in one of those crazy Special Stages! Since when did those two ever agree on anything? "Why don't you ask her? I'm sure she'll tell you the same."

"Guuuyysss! You both know she wants you to leave! Don't make me find a Powerful Pellet, because I know Histy has some around here." Stomping her foot, Neptune looked back and forth from one of the two normally opposing CPUs to the other, who were just looking at her knowingly. Neptune didn't like this one bit. "I know! I'll let you have some of my special, limited edition pudding that I've been saving if you do what Noire wants and leaves. Whaddya say? Pretty sweet deal, right?"

Nothing.

She held her ground for a moment just in case, but... No movement from her enemies. Seeing this was going nowhere fast, Neptune sighed, turning to Noire helplessly, waiting for her to reiterate how she felt about this. After all, Neptune wanted to talk to her too, but she couldn't do that if they didn't have any privacy. Even Neptune understood, no, _wanted_ that much. She had a lot of things she wanted to say to Noire after seeing those videos too.

"They're right. _I_ don't care one way or the other." Instead of agreeing with Neptune... She says that?! "If you don't mind them being here, I don't mind giving you time with them. You must have a _lot_ to talk about them with."

Neptune blinked.

That was not at all the answer she had expected to hear.

"So... You're okay with them staying after all?" She was really confused now. Had she missed something? Had there been an exchange of notes that she had missed while she blinked? Was there some secret narration going on somewhere that she wasn't able to see? What was it? "Because a minute ago, you said..."

"I never said I wanted them to leave... Jeez, Neptune. If _you_ want them to stay, then I have no problems at all with them staying. Not. One." Looking even more upset — Neptune was definitely sure she was upset now — Noire crossed her arms and looked at the wall. No... No, she was glaring at the wall. "Just pick your choice and just... Just do what you want!"

"Did you hear that, Blanc? Noire doesn't mind us staying at all. If that's how it is, well, I don't see any reason for us to leave." Smiling much too pleasantly for her own good, Vert turned to Blanc and tilted her head ever so slightly. "Do you? I rather like it here. Maybe I'll even... stay the night! Why don't you join us? After all, we're being welcomed!"

Neptune's eyes widened at this suggestion — and she was downright flabbergasted that Noire wasn't protesting it. Something had to have happened during that break when Nepgear left. It was the only explanation! At least Neptune could count on Blanc not to put up with this ridiculous idea. After all, logical, smart, testy Blanc would _never_ not only want to stay over here with all the tension, but do it by agreeing with _Vert_ on top of-

"Yeah, that's good. I'll let Mina know I'll be crashing here for a while." Nodding as though this was the most natural course of action for her to take in the world, Blanc gave her assent to Vert's plan without missing a beat. She glanced at the other CPUs in the room, before returning her gaze back to Neptune. "No one wants us to go after all."

"But... Noire... She..." The purple haired CPU looked over at her wife one more time, hoping against hope that Noire would finally say what she must have wanted from the start. And yet, even with Neptune looking at her at her like that, desperation clearly starting to seep into her voice, Noire didn't budge an inch. It didn't take a genius to see what she really wanted, so why was she acting this way?

"Noire... What? She said she was fine with it, Neptune."

"She did. So it's settled. We're staying."

"Thank you _both_ so _much_ for having us."

With their plan of action seemingly decided, the two troublemaking CPUs began taking things out of their inventories and making themselves right at home. Vert pulled out a handheld and got right to playing some game or another, while Blanc had a book in her hands and had switched out her hat for a nightcap despite the fact that it was still early in the day.

Confusion at how things had gotten to this point was one thing, but more than that, Neptune was starting to just get _frustrated_ now. What were they doing? What were they _thinking_? Didn't they realize...?

"My, Blanc, what book is that? Is it new?"

"It is. I can loan it to you sometime."

"That would be lovely."

Noire stood up. She wasn't looking at anyone else — her eyes were trained in the direction that Plutia and Nepgear had gone in earlier... The way out of the scene.

It made sense. Neptune wasn't making a move to leave and Blanc and Vert were making themselves at home. If she was going to follow through with her ultimatum, then that meant she had to leave.

Neptune looked helplessly from the pair acting like they were in their own Basilicoms to the other person besides herself who actually did belong in this Basilicom — because it was hers.

She was leaving.

Noire was leaving.

_Noire_ was _leaving_.

_Noire was leaving._

_Noire was-_

"Would you two just _leave_ already!?" She hadn't meant to raise her voice — she hadn't, she really, _really_ hadn't — but she couldn't help herself. Neptune just couldn't let Noire leave. She ached just thinking about it, even in a Special Stage like this. "I don't care if Noire is okay with you staying! Maybe her tsun limiter is broken and it's taking over her brain, I don't know, but I don't _care_, 'cause you know what? You're being more annoying than _me_ on a bad day, and I want you out! I don't care what it takes, but you're not staying another Nepping minute! I have to talk to Noire about a lot of things right now, so get going! Shoo!"

The three CPUs stared at her. Awestruck? Surprised? Angry?

Whatever it was, Neptune was ready to take them all on if it meant she...

"Well, I suppose there's no helping that, then. If we're not wanted, there's no reason to stay, now is there, Blanc?"

"Yep. I don't think it makes sense to stay either."

"Indeed. It was lovely chatting with you two — we'll see you later."

"Later."

Neptune unclenched the tightly held fist she hadn't even realized she had clenched as she watched what seemed like something more absurd than anything else that had happened today transpire. Before she knew it, she realized she felt like a deflating balloon as she watched this — like the steam that had been building up within her from the moment Noire had declared her "ultimatum" and Vert and Blanc had rejected it had just fizzled away into nothingness.

Because, without putting up so much as a fight or even a single comment to the contrary, Blanc and Vert both packed up their things and were heading out of the Basilicom, and both of them were _smiling_.

It was like they had wanted that to happen all along. It took the wind right out of her, confusing her once again — but only for a moment.

After looking over the scene again later on, Neptune would come to notice the abundance of triggers and flags that had been waving around throughout the course of the scene — they had _all_, even Blanc and Vert, wanted _Neptune_ to be the one to want Neptune and Noire to be able to be alone. Obvious, no?

Well... To Neptune? No. Not so much.

Sadly, that's just what someone has to deal with when they get their Tsunderese diploma online instead of taking the proper classes.

None of that mattered to Neptune at the moment, though. Not one bit of it. All she cared about, as soon as she was sure those two pests (or... helpers...? nah... couldn't be!) were leaving for real, was the last CPU left in the room besides herself.

Then, just as Neptune had declared she had wanted, they were alone after all.

Collecting herself as best she could, Neptune approached Noire, not even sure what to say now that she had her alone. There was a lot she _wanted_ to say. She wanted to tell Noire that no matter what any other Neptune in any other dimension or story or game felt or did for anyone else, she only cared about Noire. She wanted to tell Noire that no matter how many Special Stages came about with her with anyone else, she still only cared about Noire.

She wanted to do all that and more, but as she found herself standing before the taller CPU, ironically, raising her face just to look at her was proving to be a challenge. She hadn't _really_ "cheated" or anything, yet from seeing Noire's reaction, she felt like she had all the same. Slowly, she raised her head, preparing for whatever may come — she had gotten Noire alone and stopped her from leaving, so now was not the time to be chickening out.

"Noire, I..."

To Neptune's surprise, and stopping her words then and there, rather than a face with disappointment and pent up tsundere rage, with nothing stopping it from being unleashed now, what she saw when she looked up at Noire was a smile. An honest to goodness smile, shining at Neptune and looking _happy_.

Had Neptune woken up in a different story all of a sudden?

Did it matter with Noire looking at her like that?

Actually, did _anything_ matter with Noire looking at her like that?

"Geez, Neptune... I didn't even know you knew how to mad like that. Why did you go and do that? They didn't... They were just... Oh, never mind. I-I'm actually... Really glad that you didn't figure them out. This way was a lot better." Trying to force her gaze away from Neptune, because she just couldn't bring herself to stop smiling despite the need she felt inside to bring out her tsun, Noire sighed. "Still, I didn't think you'd go that far... Actually, I was starting to worry you wouldn't do anything at all."

"S-Shut up-! Of course the main character would do something!" Her cheeks starting to burn, Neptune looked away from the tsundere that was being way too mature and held together compared to her earlier attitude for her to be able to handle it. Then again, someone had to be right now. With Noire right in front of her, looking like that now, Neptune couldn't find the words she had wanted before — rather, she felt like Noire probably already knew them after what she had done. Knowing this, she could only manage to gaze downwards and speak quietly. "It's your fault, y'know... This is all your fault. You're the one doing this to me. Take responsibility, Noire."

_Ba-bump._

Noire felt her heart skip a beat after that — quite possibly due to all the blood rushing to her face in that moment.

"H-Hold on a minute, you're messing with our dynamic too much now. I'm the one who says things like that, remember...? You can't... You can't do that or I... I'll..."

Their roles somehow completely reversed from normal, Neptune gently reached for the fabric of Noire's dress and looked up at her with an expression only Noire would ever get to see.

Open.

Caring.

Vulnerable.

As she looked into those eyes, lost for words, Noire was pretty sure her heart stopped completely then and there.

"I can. I can do whatever I want if I have you... I can do anything, even if it ends up hurting, because of it. You did this to me, Noire." The shorter of the two closed her eyes, raising herself onto her tiptoes. Her voice got lower and lower with every sylable that left her lips. Noire could feel Neptune's warmth, her breath, it was so close she could practically... "So take responsibility already... Would you? Stop making me wait, or I'll be the one to leave."

Even as she said it, it was clear she wasn't planning on going anywhere.

Not that Noire was about to give her a chance to after that.

_The Special Stages _  
><em>Fin<em>

_... for now_


End file.
